#esketamine

The nurse practitioner decided yesterday that they will increase his esketamine dose. He goes back Monday so the change will probably not go through until Thursday due to insurance lag time.

I am beyond despair at this point. I’m not sure what comes after that. DH basically said he didn’t want to face the day today which is why he couldn’t get out of bed. Meanwhile I’ve been up with kids doing all of the chores, herding them through their routines and getting them out the door to where they need to be since 7am.

I’m tired. And just completed defeated. I’m married to someone who cannot find the energy to face the day for his wife or his kids. It’s a 💩y feeling and difficult to want to keep trying.

I wanted to share how well Spravato (esketamine nasal spray) has worked for me.

Ketamine-based treatments like Spravato promote neuroplasticity, essentially helping the brain "rewire" itself. This boosts the formation of new neural connections, making it easier to break free from negative, repetitive thought patterns and build healthier ones. As a result, many people experience reduced depressive loops, less intense anxiety, and more positive, uplifting thinking.

Spravato is particularly effective for treatment resistant depression and has shown strong results in reducing suicidal ideation. It can also support people dealing with tough life events (like breakups, death of family...etc) or long-standing harmful habits. Especially when combined with active efforts to change those patterns during treatment. I think on the issue and tell my subconscious to knock that shit off.

In my own case, I used to have 20+ panic attacks a month, including once-a-month episodes so severe that my blood pressure spiked to dangerous levels, leading to ER visits for what felt like impending stroke or heart attack. These started after a surgeon messed up and almost killed me during a surgery. Since starting Spravato, I've gone from that to just a handful of manageable panic attacks that I can usually handle at home with anti-anxiety medication. In the past 20 months, I've only had one ER visit for panic.

Hugs to my good friend who talked me through some of the roughest recent episodes — you know who you are, and thank you.

Bottom line: If you're struggling with severe anxiety, depression, or treatment-resistant symptoms, Spravato is absolutely worth discussing with a healthcare provider. It's administered under supervision in a certified treatment center due to potential side effects like dissociation (awesome), sedation (fun as well) and increased blood pressure (not mine).

Nobody will tell you this... Magnesium L-Threeonate increases the fun side effects turning it into a visual and mental trip. Very fun.

i wonder if theres any xenodrugs you can compare spravato to?

Finally done taking this med. I know its supposed to take 6 months. I took 4 years, but it did the trick. I dont need any antidepressants at all now. I'm just on gabapentin for a variety of reasons.

I'm not sure how it's supposed to work, but it really started working once I got comfortable enough that I could push myself. It's like it expanded my window of tolerance and continuously pushing that window is when the recovery really started to snow ball. I kept pushing until I found a new normal, and I'm still startled by how... stable I feel. I still get little dips every now and then, but I know on a deeper level that it will pass. I just have to hold on and use my coping skills until then, and it's usually gone in 6 or so hours.

That being said, it didn't fix everything. My anxiety is probably 50% less now but its not gone. And like... trauma gonna trauma. I still go to counseling and all that. But I have hope now. It's wild.

If you're reading this cause you're thinking about it, here's advice for the sessions themselves. I could taste it and I haaaated it. It helped immensely to have some sort of candy on hand to drown out the taste. It always made me dizzy for 2 hours, but apparently that isnt common. They only prepped me to know it will effect your sight (Colors brighter or duller). For me, it mostly impacted my sense of taste. I absolutely could not eat anything even remotely greasy for 12 hours after every treatment. Do NOT drive for at least 6 hours after leaving the appointment. Even if you feel physically fine, it is still impacting your judgment. And for me, it would make my mood wonky for about 24 hours, even at the end of treatments. Just be gentle with yourself.