#enemys

I'll go first:

-tottaly not Samuel

"WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING HERE? GET FUKING OUT."

(tag samuel account i dont know how to-)

I just logged into such an old account. It was the one I used before this and honestly...

I feel so much better now that I've deleted it.

Don't get me wrong, I wanted to go back and save the good memories, but there were just so many fucking bad ones.

There were so many dark places and toxic people in those memories. So I just deleted it.. And honestly, I'm so happy.

I was looking through messages and stuff and I found so many things that didn't even seem like me from in there.

My inbox had a single anonymous message that said something along the lines of "Hey. You know you've hurt people. You've hurt people to the brink of them not being able to trust anymore. I want you to live with that."

For those of you who didn't know me before this account, I used to be a really broken, toxic person. I was in so much shit at the time, I hurt a lot of people and a lot of people hurt me.

And honestly about that message? Yeah. I do remember that, and I do live with it. I don't really know how long ago it was sent or who sent it, but honestly I've always remembered the people who I hurt, and I've always regretted it and wondered what I could've done on the past to fix it from happening.

I remember a lot of the arguments and traumas from it too. I'll never forget it. But I have thankfully moved on.

I may not be able to make amends or take it back, but I can try to help myself heal past it. I have too after all, there's nothing anyone of us can do to fix who we used to be besides learn from it, and I did.

I'm living my best life and moving on and I honest to Buddha have no ill intent with any of those people. Yeah, I still have bad feelings, but I can at least leave it in the past.

That's why I got rid of the old blog and have decided to stay here ❤

So to the person who left that: I don't know who you are since you used anonymous, but I'm sorry about whatever interaction we had in the past and I hope we can both respectfully move on and do better. That's all we can do for now and while I wish it hadn't happened, it did, and while I apologize I know there's nothing I can do to take it back. All we can hope for is better now.

And to my friends and family who are listening: Thank you so much for being here and reading. I love you all with all of my heart and while I can't say I enjoy my past, I enjoy our moments together bad or not and I can't wait for what we will be through together now. I love you all so much. Thank you.

Almost at Alpha!

Few small tweaks tomorrow and then it’s mostly art before completion. I’ll do a bigger post then, followed by artwork the coming week.