#effort post

On the 25th a 13 yo kid named Gabriel M. armed with a blank g†n and fishing kn†fe st†bb†d his french teacher repeatedly to the neck and chest in front of three other students. motive is believed to be a long series of ab†sive behaviors that this and other teachers perpetrated against him, other than a generic misanthropy and hatred for the mundane. said psychologically ab†sive actions culminated in said french teacher writing him a disciplinary report the week before. the student had a personal hatred towards this teacher and was believed to have damaged her car before. according to the papers his grades had started to sink before the accident, he seemed more closed off and "rebellious" despite being overall a good student. the day of the attack he came to school wearing a white shirt with the red writing "vendetta" meaning "revenge", camo pants and makeshift shoulder holsters (made with belts). he also streamed the attack on telegram by using one of the belts to tie the phone to his neck. on his socials he posted a letter / manifesto called "the final solution". after the attack he was quickly apprehended by other teachers after a brief escape attempt. the teacher he attacked (his french teacher) survived and is now doing better. at home, the kid had too some illegal explosives and explosive making substances. one of his telegram friends also revealed that he had initially planned to too k†ll his father by h†tting him with a h†mmer. he had intended to go to his mother's house the next day and k†ll as well. the method of this last circumstance is unknown. he had planned to later go to school and k†ll his teacher. he didn't follow up with the plan because got scared of h†rm†ng his parents. said plan was made the day his ADHD diagnosis was supposedly rejected.

according to the news 18 people were in the telegram groupchat where he broadcasted the video but only 5 people watched it live.

He apparently was involved in 🍵🌊🌊 tok, his telegram pfp was rira as well as his tiktok one. he reposted a great deal of sinister stuff.

all of this happened in a small city in the province of Bergamo: Trescore Balneario.

here's the integral version of the final solution / manifesto:

I have come to the conclusion that I can't live a life like this anymore. A life filled with unfairness, disrespect and mundanes, I'm tired of this so I decided the perfect solution to this is taking the matter into my own hands.

I'll k†ll my french teacher. the choice isn't casual, it's targeted, she loves to pick on me, hum†liate me in front of everyone, make mean comments, unfunny jokes, and justifying vi†lence against me even when I was clearly the victim. When I got punched by a scrawny kid I didn't fight back, the teachers didn't even notice, and they were 2, I had to go up to them and tell them what happened, and this just highlights how much the school is failing.

When my fr†nch teacher had the audacity to say I deserved it, the principal didn't do anything about it, she went unpunished for something so severe. Since apparently "kids" can't understand what's good and what's not, I'll use this in my favor, I can't be imprisoned, since in Italy the minimum age for criminal liability is 14, I can't be trialed at all, so I'll do what I always wanted to do, k†ll her and everyone that tries to stop me from doing that.

It's not only an act of revenge, it's something to break a boring routine in the most extreme way possible. I'm tired of being a mundane myself, having to do the same things over and over again. rules aren't something I should follow, they're something I should break, and there's nothing better to do that than vengeance, pun†shing those who have wronged me. I always loved to break rules, whether they were ethical, moral or l†gal, all of these are just things that limitate me, and if something challenges my freedom, I feel like it's a personal attack on my autonomy.

if somebody tells me not to do something, most times I'll feel inclined to do that even more. The last straw that made me choose this radical decision was my ADHD diagnosis, I struggle with attention and that's a fact, yet when prompted to complete a test on my behavior, my teacher gave low scores on being distracted, but she doesn't hesitate to point that out when I'm in class, and this just makes me mad. It feels like sabotage.

She's chaining me to this life of struggle all because she dislikes me. Since being only 13, im entirely helpless in this situation and I cant do much to change the path thats been chosen for me. My life is being dictated by adults who don't care for me, my french teacher wants nothing but to fill my life with p†in and suffer†ng by abus†ng her power, she's so powerless in her life that she decides taking her anger out on a bunch of middle schoolers is a great way to unwind.

My clothing choices. The military uniform isn't a random choice. I chose it because I see myself as a soldier fighting for my rights that got neglected. I also feel superior to all my peers. yes, sometimes they're funny, but I feel like I'm way smarter than them, and wearing a uniform shows how im superior to all these mundanes. I'm no longer one of them, I'm someone better, someone who had the strength to do what many don't, someone who has the intelligence to realise that no one really advocates for us and our needs. Every part of my outfit was thought for a reason. the skull face masks isn't to express a specific ideology, it's just visually pleasant and I like the aesthetic. For the shirt, the choice wasn't random. I didn't choose the usual n†tural sel†ction crap. I'm unique and I'm not a copycat of any previous school attack.

i want to be recognizedfor going against the norm: I want to bring novelty. vendetta isn't a random word. it represents how I feel, I'm getting the sweet revenge I deserve by k†lling people that wronged me.

As for my political ideology I don't fit neatly into any clear ideology because the only thing that matters is me, no one else matters, no life matters beyond mine. life is pointless if you decide to live it like a rat, following a routine everyday like a sl†ve. you need to give your life a meaning, and the meaning of my life is to indulge in all my fantasies, disregarding others and the thrill of vi†lating rules is the best pleasure of my life.

I don't have many friends and that's because most people consider me weird or see me as insufferable. I like socializing but at the same time I hate going out, seeing people laughing in groups just makes me mad, they're all just a bunch of stupid mundanes that are all the same, like they were all copy pasted from a boring blueprint.

The only person I get along with well was someone I met a few days ago, her name is Euno. I'm in love with her. she seems relatable, she's funny and she's attractive. I truly wish we could stay in contact even after my att†ck. I highly doubt that. even if I know I'm gonna be disappointed, I want to leave a little room for hope. I wish to live in her memories forever, even if I know nothing last this long.

because of his age his face was never showed on the news, we only have the few pictures of him that he himself and his friends (euno in particular) made public.

also adding this one drawing of himself he or his friend apparently made that made it onto national television lol

Regarding his ideology we have some news: a polish girl recently claimed to have gotten d†xxed by the boy, forced to reveal her secrets and subsequently bl†ckm†iled into s†lf h†rming. Apparently Gabriel had threatened to tell the girl's mom these 'secrets'.

(this post is gonna get updated whenever I find more information)

okay. This might be a long post cause I'm not very good at explaining things, and I tend to speak in very round-about and long-winded ways. Also, I'm using proper grammar and no TQ. That's how you know im smart, and correct. (Sarcasm.)

Alot of people shipping in the Homestuck fandom don't really regard any other quadrants other than flushed romance (Matespritship) and it's not necessarily a bad thing, but I think it speaks alot to how people just... don't really understand the other three quads.

Most of the experience I have seeing people treat kismesiship is as just another word for enemies to lovers, or worse, platonic hatred. I think people should treat characters in Homestuck (Specifically the trolls, I don't think this necessarily applies to the humans) casually hating eachother the same as them casually liking eachother. To trolls, "I love you" is just as intense as "I hate you" and the same for "like" and "dislike."

WHILE I don't want to be that guy who's all "Erm in canon they're friends!" Because, obviously. Fucking look at me. I brand myself as the Eridirk guy. They have absolutely zero canon on screen interraction-- the Eridan we see and the Dirk we see don't even know eachother exist.

I strongly believe everybody has a right to ship and interpret characters however they want. I would be an obtuse hypocrite if I said they couldn't. I just think the way people interpret Eridan's "Pitch Fishing" (MY term I made up. Do not steal. /j) as actual meaningful hatred is willfully misunderstanding Eridan's character. In [S] Kanaya: return to the core, Eridan was very obviously fighting Sollux as a cry for attention, or how I interpet it, as him trying to look "cool" and "strong" in front of Feferi. At the very least he wanted Feferi to assume the position as their auspistice, which would negate Eridan and Sollux from having a proper blackrom. I think Feferi was right in assuming Eridan was just fighting with him to push them out of their flush quadrant, to say the least.

Gay shit I read 2024-2025

Doughnuts Under a Crescent Moon (Shio Usui) Romance; yuri (sapphic), asexuality Complete

A woman believes she can't fall in love and something is wrong with her... and then she falls for her coworker. I enjoyed the story but was worried that the author didn't believe in gays, but then we got a sweet ace lesbian conclusion.

The Bride was a Boy (Chii) Autobiography; transgender Complete

Please forgive this comic for it's misgendering title, the author is talking about herself. Really sweet story about her transition and relationship and wedding, interspersed with "trans 101" informative comics.

Sweet Blue Flowers (Takako Shimura) Drama; yuri (sapphic) Complete

An ensemble story with a sprawling cast, the story of a girl coming out to her old childhood friend, is clearly out to explore the "class S" narrative (of girls dating girls while in sex-segregated high school and then "growing out of it"). The story's big cast allows it to both engage and subvert class S tropes. (Lol that $2 sticker)

Crossplay love: Otaku x Punk (Toru) Romantic comedy; boy's love, crossdressing Ongoing (I've read seven vols.)

As a trans guy, crossdressing manga makes me hesitate, but this one really won me over with its big heart. A boy crushes on a cute waitress at a maid cafe, an establishment he would never be seen in. He starts crossdressing to disguise himself to go to the cafe.... except the waitress is really a boy from his high school, who he couldn't care less about. Very wholesome, very silly mistaken identity manga. I don't think it's heading in a trans direction............ but it should.

The Girl That Can't Get a Girlfriend (Mieri Hananishi) Autobiography; lesbian Complete

The author is a masculine lesbian who is attracted to other masculine women, and this autobiography details her dating adventures with cool, princely women who break her heart. Come for the dating shenanigans, stay for an exploration of mental health and self-esteem.

I Married My Best Friend to Shut My Parents Up (Naoko Kodama) Romance; yuri (sapphic) Complete

When a woman's parents keep bugging her to get married, she tells them off by marrying her old friend. Pros: The protagonist yelling at her homophobic mom and battling her sexist workplace Cons: I wasn't sold on the relationship, and found the love interest annoyingly pushy. This is the one thing on this list I can't recommend.

I Married My Female Friend (Shio Usui) Slice-of-life; yuri (sapphic) Complete

Deja vu time. For a country that doesn't have gay marriage, Japan keeps producing books about female friends who get married. These two are not fake married, not in a fake relationship. These two women openly going "we're platonic friends but we're married," and the audience waits for them to kiss. It's sweeter and more enjoyable than the last one, but I definitely spent some time going "Why did they get married again??"

Super Late Bloomer; My Life in Transition; It Was So Warm (Julia Kaye) Autobiography; transgender, questioning sexuality, sapphic (Books complete for now, the author is continuing to make autobio comics on her Patreon.)

These heartfelt comics document the artist's transition, exploring her sexuality, her relationship with her self-esteem, her dating life, and grieving relationships. Great series!

The Guy She Was Interested in Wasn't a Guy at All (Sumiko Arai) Romance; yuri (sapphic) Ongoing (I've read two vols.)

A trendy girl secretly likes dad rock and develops a crush on the part-timer guy at the music store... who she doesn't realize is actually her awkward loner female classmate. (She really isn't a guy at all, the other girl just mistook her gender.) Really heartfelt manga about the magical feeling of connection with someone who shares your special interests.

Until I Love Myself (Poppy Pesuyama) Autobiography; non-binary Complete

Really fantastic manga primarily about the author's experience recovering from workplace sexual harassment by their then-boss (another manga artist), and how their trauma is compounded by their gender dysphoria.

Is Love the Answer? (Uta Isaki) Drama; asexuality Complete

This book is a really great asexuality 101 explainer and shows how confusing and heartbreaking it can be to be asexual in a heteronormative society without having other examples of ways to live, and how finding that label can be such a relief.

My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness; My Solo Exchange Diary (Nagata Kabi) Autobiography; lesbian I don't know this series' status; I read 3 vols.

The first volume is an absolute must-read. It's a fantastic examination of severe depression paired with the author's decision to hire a sex worker. The volume ends on a hopeful note, but the later volumes show that the author's serious mental health struggles are far from over... it's almost like real life is narratively unsatisfying.

Even Though We're Adults (Takako Shimura) Drama; yuri (sapphic) Complete

Two women in their mid-thirties meet at a bar, hit it off, and kiss. One of them is a lesbian, and the other is... married to a man. I think the story is a fascinating examination of how a marriage is much bigger than "two people who like each other," and how difficult it can be to figure out what you want while caught between heteronormative family structures.

Bonus: BL Metamorphosis (Kaori Tsurutani) Slice-of-life Complete

I want to reflect on the past few months, especially regarding my transition.

For the past four years, since beginning high school, I have been in a very bad place mentally. The social isolation from covid coupled with a general issue with self-esteem stemming from undiagnosed autism made my transition into high school less than ideal. Without digressing too much, I started to self-harm and stopped, almost developed an eating disorder, attempted suicide and ideated over it for a large part of my high school years. As such, I've developed some very toxic, emotionally dependent social relations, friendships. I was in a dark place. And during all of this I've started to explore gender identity.

What started as me discovering I was bisexual turned into experimenting with being a "femboy" turned into two years of repression. As with everything, I doubted my true gender identity. I was autogynephylic or I wasn't trans "enough", whatever that means. In short, I always found an excuse to tell myself I was a boy. One miserable, lost boy.

Then, in summer of last year, I finally confessed to myself my true gender identity, that I was indeed transgender, transfeminine. I started HRT, perhaps the most consequential decision I have made and will make in my life. I'm glad I did so. Since then, while the road has been rocky to say the least, including relapse and social troubles, the last eight months of my life, since I have genuinely accepted my gender identity, have been the happiest months of my life. Not because I'm jolly or whimsy everyday or that everything goes to plan. Quite the opposite actually. No, for the first time in my life, I am genuinely realizing myself. I am becoming Me. I am finding Me in this world. I am becoming actually sure of myself. I have found so many amazing people. I have started to do things I genuinely like. I have started to live life, not just survive it.

It is hard, still. I still get depressed I still doubt myself, and I still have mental health issues. I don't think I'll ever fully get rid of them, only learn how to cope. That is alright. What Transition gave me was for the first time in my life a genuine sense of self, an actual feeling of autonomy in my life, a true sense of belonging that is not superficial, but one deep within myself.

Transition has been the ultimate act of self-compassion for myself.