#edgebug

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by Edgebug

"Holy fucking shit! Wolvie!" Wade yelps. "Fuck, the one time I don't come armed, this shit happens! I'll be right back, I--"

"That was the last of 'em," the old man says, raggedly, breathing hard. He's a little beaten-up--he's healed everything near-instantly, of course, but Wade can still see the damage to his clothes, the patterns of splattered blood that prove he had been hurt.

"The last of who?!" Wade steps gingerly over a few bodies to get to the old man's side.

"Mutant hunters, I reckon, tryin' to take me in. Happens from time to time."

"What?! No the fuck it doesn't!" Wade feels insane. More than normal. "What do you mean, mutant hunters? This is normal for you?!"

Wade is elaborately ignored. The old man wipes his claws off ineffectually on his corduroys--there's already so much blood on them that a little more doesn't matter. "Goddamn," he grumbles, "y'know, I really liked these pants."

(In which things finally happen.)

Words: 8157, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 6 of the rule not exception

Fandoms: Deadpool (Movieverse), Deadpool - All Media Types

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: M/M

Characters: Dogpool | Mary Puppins (Deadpool Movies), another Wade Wilson variant haunting the narrative dead wife style

Relationships: Logan | Worst Wolverine (Deadpool Movies)/Wade Wilson, Logan | Old Man Variant (Deadpool Movies)/Wade Wilson

Additional Tags: logan being the most passive aggressive bitch on the planet, Angst, Fluff, the allusions are no longer allusions they are simply textual, logan knows transgender, Nightmares, cuddling your bro when he has a nightmare and is still asleep and needs you for physical comfort to feel safe again. bro, Frotting, somehow valiantly managing to bone at quite possibly the least erotic locale imaginable, incredibly poor communication, Not Actually Unrequited Love, vitriolic love confessions, somewhere in the great beyond a red-suited maniac is cheering and high-fiving death herself, mentions of dogfighting and pet euthanasia

like i am by no means saying they all are but everything from the roster construction (lets leave off the best american scorer who happens to not be white) to some of the loudest players does not instil confidence. a year ago noah hanifin said team usa wanted to win 4nations for trump. matthew tkachuk sits on trump's transphobic as fuck sports council and said walking with him after winning the cup with the panthers was worth more than winning the damn cup itself. bill guerin also during 4nations said the players would use trump's attendance as inspiration and they'd love for him to be there. these are things people are saying aloud mind you. they're comfortable sharing this. what is the environment on that team where prominent figures feel comfortable expressing this? certainly not one that suggests the vast majority of the people around them aren't also on board.

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by Edgebug

Wade groans, bonks his head against the old man's shoulder. "No. He isn't into me," he says, slowly, like he's trying to explain poker to a toddler. Which he would never do, unless it would be really funny.

"Nah, that ain't right," the old man says, in apparent disbelief. "Is that why you marched in here lookin' like you'd seen a ghost?"

"No," Wade replies. "I walked in here looking like I'd seen a ghost because something way worse happened. He says he wants to meet you."

The old man's grin could be visible from space. "Well? What'd you say?"

"Before or after I finished shitting my pants?"

(In which Logan meets the old man.)

Words: 9401, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 5 of the rule not exception

Fandoms: Deadpool (Movieverse), Deadpool - All Media Types

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Dogpool | Mary Puppins (Deadpool Movies)

Relationships: Logan | Worst Wolverine (Deadpool Movies)/Wade Wilson, Logan | Old Man Variant (Deadpool Movies)/Wade Wilson

Additional Tags: history's stupidest shovel talk, Jealousy, mutually antagonistic pining, Pining While Fucking, violence against local wildlife, meeting your boy best friend's fuck buddy who is a hot older alternate universe version of you while he doesn't know you love him, Suspicion, Frottage, passive aggressive carpentry, regularly aggressive carpentry, schrödinger's cucking, Praise Kink, unrequited (?) love, humor despite it all, Angst, Smut, Grizzly Bears, "grizzly bears", Self-Esteem Issues, the haunting allusions are no longer vague, Wade Wilson's Inappropriate Humor, YOU get abandonment issues!! and YOU get abandonment issues!!! everyone gets abandonment issues!!!, includes art :), Accidental Voyeurism, accidental exhibitionism. sort of.

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by Edgebug

Wade is in deep shit. He is currently as screwed as a long-tailed cat in a rocking chair factory. A non-Pixar rat at a dinner party. A snowball in hell.

Things could not be worse if it were pissing down literal piss.

(In which Wade Wilson lies in the bed he made.)

Words: 5243, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 4 of the rule not exception

Fandoms: Deadpool - All Media Types, Deadpool (Movieverse)

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Categories: M/M

Relationships: Logan | Worst Wolverine (Deadpool Movies)/Wade Wilson, Logan | Old Man Variant (Deadpool Movies)/Wade Wilson

Additional Tags: Canon-Typical Violence, blowjobs and rimjobs mentioned and alluded to, mutually destructive pining, Self-Esteem Issues, very poor conflict resolution technique, egregious lion king references, Post-Coital Cuddling, cringefail public urination (non-kink), actions having consequences, absolutely miserable middle aged men. just totally sopping wet pathetic miserable sad middle aged men., Non-erotic stabbing, Uncrustables

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by Edgebug

Wade's Inconvenient Feelings about Logan aren't going away. In point of fact, they are getting worse.

Sometimes Wade wakes up in the morning and Logan has inched closer to him in the night, so they're touching--sometimes one of Logan's whole big meaty arms is flopped over Wade's chest or stomach or back, even. Damn near a proper cuddle. And Wade doesn't move, fuck, he hardly breathes, he just lies there, electrified and tingling everywhere their skin is in contact. Scared to let on that he's awake, scared to wake Logan up and cut the moment short.

He feels like a creep. He can't stop.

Words: 6777, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 3 of the rule not exception

Fandoms: Deadpool (Movieverse), Deadpool - All Media Types

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Dogpool | Mary Puppins (Deadpool Movies)

Relationships: Logan | Worst Wolverine (Deadpool Movies)/Wade Wilson, Logan | Old Man Variant (Deadpool Movies)/Wade Wilson

Additional Tags: bad decisions all around, two guys who are allergic to speaking like grown ups, Panties, handjobs, crying during sex (positive), wade and logan both putting their feet in their mouths (nonsexual) (nonliteral), vaguely haunting allusions, Fluff and Angst, humor despite it all, Unrequited Love, Or Is It?, mutually antagonistic pining, wade throwing down for vanessa's honor