#eartheater

new eartheater album is maybe the most interesting thing she's released, like there's a lot there about complicated feelings towards pregnancy, motherhood, and having a daughter specifically. last few days I've been listening to it while walking and whenever she says "nice to think nothing my daughter will do will shock me" there's such a doom and resignation to it. like yeah it would be nice to think. starting the song off with this body isn't mine it's my mothers and hers before hers and hers before hers - the way this body exists in the song, it's also the house her family is too big for - this body is like a structure, housing all these women inside. they give birth to each other and then return back into the body, the house, which is neither big enough to give birth nor house them. and like she's so beaten down on the chorus, saying she's always been so scandalous, she was blamed for her mothers wrinkles, but at the same time it's this tacit acknowledgment; her mother wasn't shocked was she, and neither was hers before and hers before. the family is too big for the house, there isn't room for a daughter. "daughter" and "mother" themselves contrasted with these pornographic caricatures of women, slut-nun, bimbo, these caricatures are used to describe the house itself, which is the body, all of their body. no matter who is mother and who is daughter all of them are each other, they are all perceived as the madonna and the whore. did she ever shock her mother or did she just scare her? she has to wonder if she's ever really shocked her mother, and she has to wonder what else she'll inherit. in a way she's lived out the weirdest impulses of any of them and doesn't plan to stop to create a wholesome image of a mother, so maybe her daughter will do things she did. but the actions are irrelevant. the feeling doesn't happen because of the action, it happens because of your daughter.