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"Listen, I heard what you said. I really listened, I tried. I understand your wants, but I really do need you although you may not be able to see it. It's pretty deep down inside. If you walk away now, well you'll need a composite sketch of my chalk line. That when our eyes locked in that bar, I knew one day we would have to walk the line. I just didn't think it would be now, it just doesn't make any sense. I want you right next to me, each and every moment. That as long as we're next to each other, the real world doesn't have to exist and we make ours the best."
- A Pillar Of Love II
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DISPATCHES FROM 2ND ST. STUDIOS: Fatboi Sharif & DRIVEBY in session
I went to DRIVEBYās apartment in Jersey City because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of documenting musical exxxprrrimentation, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I knew witnessing Fatboi Sharif in the studio would be morbidly rewardingāI felt it in my critikās skull-and-crossbones (memento mori, pirate flag, poison pictogram). It was New Yearās Day in the year of our Lord Have Mercy 2024, and I had to pull myself away from a tree documentary that had, sadly, begun to disappoint. I had opened a stocking-stuffed box of Goobers and was reluctant when Sharif sent the invitational text. I had settled in for the night. But it was my idea to watch the man work his black magikal esoterika hammer-donāt-hurt-them-witches recording session, so Iād be a real punk to rebuff the offer. I got into the Toyota and headed down Route 3 toward Jersey City. I was on the 1&9 in no timeāthe truest highway to hell, if one ever existed. Ate de Jong could never scout such a location. AC/DC roadside appliance wasteland. Potholes pave the way, but in a De Nah Soul manner. I finished eating the Goobers in the car, by the palmful, and lost one to an erratic lane merge. I motherfucked and shitted at the thought of a chocolate stain on my upholstered driverās seat, or worse, the seat of my pants. My dad delivered Blimpieās for thirty-plus years in Jersey City, long before it became Brooklyn-of-the-West, so I know parking spots there are at a never-dream-of-āem premium. I parked several blocks away from DRIVEBYās studio and cloven-hoofed it while huffing brick air. Texted from outside, but Sharif was already ushering me through a wrought-iron gate (suitable for guttings and impalements) and into the basement apartment: DRIVEBYās 2nd St. Studios. That gate was like an entrance into a secret gardenāoverblown and overflowinā with a riot of root rot, weeds, and (of course) crumbling-but-still-grumbling gargoyles, most with the medieval motif of mooning jutting out from the church buttresses. DRIVEBYās had a William Shatnerās TekWorld comic next to his speaker. Dusty keyboards lined the floor. Sega Genesis cartridges, a Sharp boombox, and the requisite vinyl collection on bowing crates completed the scene. The space stored antiquated and dead mediaāghost machines humming and haunting.
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Sharif told me heād be recording some tracks for his upcoming album with Blockhead, something for Bigg Jus, and several features. When I arrived, he was in the middle of recording one of the Blockhead tracks. The mic and the iso shield were directly inside the door of the apartment, and I sat on the couch to the left of that. Sharif would be spitting at me, beyond me, as he did his thingāan intimate setting, to say the very least. Beans of Antipop Consortium sat on this same cushion months earlier, I thought. They recorded āSex With the Leopard Print Ladyā here. While I pondered the legacy of stylist berzerkers of past and present, Key & Peele played on the television in front of me. I wanted to make myself scarce, invisible as possible, Brundlefly-on-the-wall, non-participatory, so I watched the āLaron Canāt Laughā sketch on mute and registered how Laronās noiseless convulsions and eventual shriek expertly pantomimed Sharifās vocals. These layers of silence allowed me to hear some of what Sharif was spewing forth and commit it to memory. He spoke of avenging the death of Candyman. The words loom like Tony Toddātall as a ponderosa pine in a Cabrini-Green courtyard. Caroline crossed eyelidsā¦90 degree pressure⦠Closing in on 400 degreez, but weāre talking below zero. The winter of our disconnected selves. Sharif tells DRIVEBY he wants his voice to sound āfucked up.ā Heās snorting, super sinusy. He wants to cultivate a specific soundāit coats the inner concavities of his skull. He just needs to externalize it into a self-portrait in a convex DAW interface. āThe soul establishes itself,ā John Ashbery writes. Sharif is shoeless, I should add. Heās black socked as he cuts the songās first of three adlib tracks. The first is completely muddled, barely audibleāa grumbly grumble grumb. The second is a helium-huffed high pitch mania. The third, a yellāāthe banshee,ā as DRIVEBY calls it. Sharif slackens the headphone wires and walks across the room. He does āthe bansheeā from as great a distance as possible. Youāve no doubt heard the banshee adlib track before (B.A.T. for short, as in, the hematophagic vampire bat). If youāve heard a Fatboi Sharif recording, youāve likely heard a hotly desperate and deranged voice coming from the depths of a hellmouthāsinners swallowed and still writhing, quasi-alive, anticipating rigor mortis. DRIVEBY captures the natural reverb. Sharif asks him to put distortion and echo on the last word of the verse.Ā
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Fatboi Sharif was reading lyrics off his phone, but by then he was Loosifa looseāengaging me, inviting me to dialogue, reveling in the job.Ā His feet are light and nimble, like McCarthyās Judge. He says that he will never die. And, you bet, he dances in light and in shadow. Heās a craftsman and possesses an engineerās ear, an ant-infested and severed one he probably plucked from a manicured lawn in Scotch Plains, NJ, Jeffrey Beaumont style. For the second verse of the song, he makes an alteration and decides to end the verse earlier than he had written it, stopping at the phrase ārole modelā because he likes the āswing of it.ā Okay, Nuke Hellington. I see you, Benny Badman. A natural performer, the recording session reflects both technical know-how and impassioned delivery. He doesnāt quite lose himself as he does on the stage (or the audience floor where he so often ends up), but heās unequivocally locked in, as he kids say. Locked in a room with padded walls, more apropos. On the next, he requires a seemingly endless run of retakes. I begin to wonder if my presence is a burden, a distraction. But the session keeps its devil-may-care air intact. Still, Sharif has a sonic vision he yearns to achieve. He wonāt settle for less. He eventually gets the take he desires and tells DRIVEBY heās gonna do three adlibs. These two men work in harmony to develop their songs of disharmony. Theyāve been boys, and so that keeps the chemistry alchemical for the duration. Open and honest, DRIVEBY tells Sharif that three tracks of adlibs is ātoo many.ā FUCK THAT! Sharif shouts at him. Sharif wants the adlibs to sound beneath everythingāsix-feet deep, or āburied alive and will come forth later in uglier waysā (unexpressed emotions, that is), as Freud or a Freud-fraud once wrote. Sharif wants echoes. He wants to sound like heās a signal coming in and out of the radio as you drive through the night. These are the requests he makes, delicately selected from his mental doom board as DRIVEBY adjusts the mix, adds effects. āDo you do a lot of vocal mixing on the spot?ā I ask. Sharif shakes his head, points to DRIVEBY slumped over his computer monitor, clicking and dragging, random access memory maybe lagging: āHeās on his Bob Power shit.ā Listening to the playback, Sharif tells me he wants to be like Joker in the childrenās hospital scene. What kinda clown carries a fuckinā gun?! Iām waiting for the next Sharif release, crossing my fingers into an arthritic mass of flesh and bone in hopes of his cover of āIf Youāre Happy and You Know Itā appearing on the tracklist.Ā
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DRIVEBY puts Joker on the TV. Itās the bus scene; he canāt stop laughing. He hands a fellow passenger his card: Forgive my Laughter: I have a Condition. Sharif still sleeps to beats. Heās told this story numerous times to various media outlets, and so itās beginning to take on the tone of lore. But itās not. Even wilder, heās not listening on headphones as he sleeps; he blasts the beats on speakers. Sharif prefers to record late, well into the wee hours of morning. DRIVEBYās couch often becomes Sharifās bed. āHeāll have the same beat on for five hours,ā DRIVEBY explains. Heāll be in his bedroom, unable to sleep. Sharif grins and tells me, āThatās when Iām in the mindfuck.ā Sharif reapproaches the mic. Another Blockhead track. āHe told me he made this one especially for me,ā Sharif says. The beat sounds like a Gregorian chant in a cavern. Beware of the Shroom Monster. Sharif has managed to amass an intimidating number of releases over the past several years while not indulging us to excess. Heās conservative with his run-times. Clocks aināt shit to him. Many of his projects are EP-length, but categorizing them in any terms would seem to discredit his ingenuity. As the session unofficially ends and we settle into more casual conversation, Sharif implores DRIVEBY to play selections from their unreleased album, currently on ice like a corpse. I listen and hear of an exorcism of Antoinette, of Elvira and death resurrections, of Basquiat painting in Transylvania, crossroads, and plosive sonic samples from The Pagemasterāa film I have absolutely no recollection of but DRIVEBY speaks almost as highly of as his Fantastic Damage instrumental CD-R. OneShotOnce shows up, presumably for a session, but not before he and Sharif pillage DRIVEBYās fridge. They feast on cold chicken while I gather myself to leave.Ā
Images: Astronomical table detail from the Almanach Purpetuum of Abraham Zacuto (c. 1500)