#drakenstoreth

Welcome, friend.

Your pleas have not fallen upon deaf ears.  Contrary to the biased, illogical, irrational, lying, slandering, idiotic, imbecilic, traitorous, odorous, malefic, impotent, meaningless, libelous propaganda endorsed by the Exiles and their ilk, we of the Dominion are not completely without hearts and souls.  We think, we breathe, we live and we love just as you do.

Unfortunately your request has come to my lovely lavender ears… just a tad bit too late.

If it is any consolation, I found to my surprised pleasure that the scent of burning bushberry actually enhanced the atmosphere of my home, lending a comforting aroma to the otherwise carefully laid-out environs.  I hope you take comfort in the knowledge that the cruel, untimely, firey, probably quite painful death of one poor innocent tree who had never harmed anyone or anything (except of course for the composition of one Dominion agent’s government-sponsored dwelling) contributed to two nights’ pleasant sleep for that particular draken (and I think, though I cannot state for certain, the enhanced… vigor… of one of her male companions.  Further experimentation is required on this point).

That said: I came home this morning to an unfortunate new quandary.

It seems you are not the only individual who read my post and decided to take action.  The ones on my porch were marked COD.

The damned things are huge and they are everywhere!

I blame my sisters.

I have of course but one recourse — one solution to this predicament. 

However.  However!  

As I said before, I am not completely heartless. I know even now that the fate to which I must doom these poor plants is going to tear at your soft, tiny, tattered and lovingly-patched, impossibly warm and fuzzy little aurin heart.  

And so, I shall make you an offer.  A deal!  A trade.

One of you —  yes, you!

— for one of them.

I’ll be waiting.

Kiss kiss,Astoreth of Dunemaw

I received this plant of harmless-enough appearance as a welcome gift from Protostar when I took their damnable tour.  I have been trying to place it in my state-provided housing and I have come believe it is cursed.

I have tried it near the door.

I have tried it behind the bar.

I have tried it by the couch.

I have tried it in the kitchen.

I have tried it in the stairwell.

Nowhere does it fit.  Nowhere does it feel appropriate.  Nowhere is the feng shui of its placement comforting and satisfying.  The thing weighs as much as three granok and is unwieldy and unstable.  Even with my catlike grace and reflexes I lost my grip upon the vase while situating it on the stairs and upon ending its violent descent the monstrous piece of decor broke a chair, upturned a table and shattered three glasses.

This is why I am forever content to reside at my sister's dwelling.  I am not meant to be a home decorator, and to do battle with house plants.

And this hateful shrub is good for but one purpose.

easierbythree

"Like Legionnaire Miroes, she’s been an unexpected bright spot on my pilgrimage.  She is learned and kind, but I also feel — and perhaps this is blind hope on my part — that she understands the value of perspective, that my strength may not be Draken strength, but that does not necessarily make me weak.  She’s also, um… quite lovely?