#dongmin

and you weren’t alone, either. given that the apartment was a two bedroom one as opposed to his, it was only rational that you brought a roommate with you - a roommate he’d learned to be your childhood best friend, minju, one that you’ve grown so close with that the two of you not only stuck together throughout the entirety of high school but also all the way to university.

he saw the two of you on your first day, carrying numerous boxes of various sizes, chirping excitedly about finally being out of your family house and getting to be more independent. he walked a few meters behind, carrying his weekly groceries, headphones on but no music playing. he had to discreetly learn something about his new neighbours - and listening intently to your conversation was a great way to do that without having to actually get to know either of you. a perfect solution for dongmin, especially considering that you were far from silent: mumbling about anything and everything all the way up the stairs and down the hall right to the door of your apartment.

normally, he would lend a helping hand and offer to carry some of the boxes - neighbour courtesy, or whatever people called it. but he had deadlines to meet for his job and a project he couldn’t wait on continuing. he quickly slid into his apartment and locked the door behind him, leaving the introductions to his new neighbours for another day. not that he was particularly awaiting that moment: he was rather indifferent to it at that point.

but he couldn’t escape the chaos that ensued from the moment you stepped foot into the building.

dongmin first met you when getting back from a particularly long hangout with his friends - a monthly game night arranged by jaehyun. the evening was full of chaos and arguing over whose house rules were closest to the actual rules of the games played. when the meeting finally wrapped up, it was already 2am. the only thing dongmin wanted was to quietly retreat to his apartment and get straight into bed.

he stood inside the elevator, eyes half opened, waiting for the doors to close. as soon as they started moving, he noticed someone slipping inside at the very last minute - stopping the doors in its movements for a few seconds.

his eyes laid on you and he couldn’t keep a straight face, brows furrowing in confusion, amusement, even.

there you stood, breathing heavily, a bag of snacks in one hand and your phone in the other. it wasn’t anything special - he completely understood the idea of late night cravings from time to time. what caught him off-guard more than anything was your outfit.

dongmin liked to think of himself as someone who dresses well. he took pride in the curated collection of clothes he owned, a collection perfectly encapsulating his personal style and the way he wanted to present himself. despite that, he was never the one to judge.

but the sight of you in a shrek themed bathrobe, pink sweats and the cutest pair of wiener dog slippers definitely made him chuckle a little too loud.

you shot him a look the moment you heard the sound come out of his mouth, a slightest hint of embarrassment visible by the deep pink shade gracing the tips of your ears.

‘oh, come on. it’s not like i went out for a fancy dinner wearing that.’ you argued, voice cutting through the silence in the elevator.

‘noted.’ dongmin nodded, now staring at the elevator doors in front of him, waiting for it to get to its destination. ‘still quite an odd choice, though.’

‘it’s called dressing for comfort, mr. emo. do you own any clothes that aren’t black?’

he could hear the playfulness in your tone, giving you a slightly offended look . still, you didn’t miss the way his lips curved up into a grin at your comment.

‘i do.’ he stated.

‘socks don’t count.’

‘i still do.’ he could hear you chuckle as he mumbled, the elevator doors finally opening on your floor. the two of you stepped out of it, heading down the hallway in silence - the only sound being from the plastic bag and snacks inside of it. ‘and don’t call me that.’ dongmin added, right as he was about to open the door to his apartment.

‘what, mr. emo?’ you asked jokingly, purposefully repeating the nickname. the boy frowned. ‘well, i don’t know your name.’

‘it’s dongmin.’

you quickly told him yours, a smile on your face as you saw him nod, disappearing inside his apartment a few seconds after.

dongmin couldn’t help but sigh. he could already tell you were a chaos incarnate - something that would throw him off of his perfect routine of tranquility and peace. and yet that wasn’t the worst thing.

the worst thing was that he caught his lips curving up into a smile while thinking of you.

dongmin has grown accustomed to living across from a chaos incarnate - the past few months might’ve changed his life greatly, but he didn’t seem to be complaining much. at least not anymore. he still wasn’t the biggest fan of the unpredictability of your actions, never knowing whether he’d not see you leave your apartment for a week or have to get through your bizarre stories during an elevator ride together for five days straight.

to him, you were like a hurricane - he never knew what you’d do next, where the wind would take you. it was quite amusing, though, your irregularity. he had to admit.

dongmin stepped out of the elevator, grocery bags in both his hands, headphones on as his newly perfected playlist graced his ears. the day had been particularly good for him - no changes of plans, no disturbances at work, no crowds cramming in the public transport on his way home.

then his eyes landed on you.

first thing he noticed was that you were sitting on the floor in front of your apartment, which seemed strange enough on it’s own. still he could’ve chalked it up to an argument with your roommate or anything of that sort. but the more he noticed, the less sense it made for him - the fact that you were still in your work clothes, the bag you used everyday propped against the wall right next to you, the frown on your face.

he took out his phone to pause the music, taking his headphones off in one swift motion.

‘something happened?’ dongmin’s voice cut through your thoughts, you finally noticing his tall frame hovering over you as you looked up at him, his expression full of confusion.

you sighed. deep. frustrated.

‘it’s stupid.’ you muttered standing up, dusting off your pants in the process. ‘you gotta promise not to laugh.’

dongmin gave you an amused smirk, tilting his head to the side just slightly.

‘what, did you forget your keys or something?’

you looked away in embarrassment. that action alone was enough of an answer.

‘well, when is minji coming back?’ he asked and your expression shifted uncomfortably, like you couldn’t bear to say the answer out loud.

‘in two days.’ you mumbled.

‘oh.’

dongmin kept his poker face for around five seconds before letting out a laugh, the frown on your face deepening even more as a result, as well as the redness of your cheeks.

‘it’s not funny!’ you argued, trying to sound convincing. but it was all to no avail - dongmin just couldn’t take you seriously at that moment, the whole situation being so bizarre to him he couldn’t help but continue laughing.

‘alright, alright.’ he seemed to calm down only after you threatened to hit him with your bag, hands up in a pacifist pose. ‘can’t you stay at your parent’s house?’

‘they live three hours away.’

‘friends?’

‘i tried, but they all either have plans for the weekend or are out of the city.’

dongmin nodded slowly, taking in all of the information provided.

and then he sighed.

‘you can stay at my place.’ he muttered, and your head shot up so fast you swore you could feel it in your neck for the next few hours.

‘you don’t have to do that.’ you quickly answered, afraid of inconveniencing him. dongmin shook his head.

‘i know i don’t.’ he stated, voice stoic and flat, as if he’d just said the most obvious thing on the planet. ‘if i didn’t want to help, i wouldn’t even offer.’

you let out a little hum, still sceptical to the idea.

‘are you sure i’m not inconveniencing you?’

‘i’m sure.’

your arms loosened up hearing those words, finally giving in. dongmin saw the change instantly, hand reaching to grab the keys to his apartment from where they rested in his pockets the last few hours.

his apartment was everything you could’ve expected from him. seeing it for the first time only made you realise that he tailored it to himself almost to a t.

the decor consisted mostly of anything music related - vinyls and cds of his favorite bands, an electric guitar standing in the corner next to the sofa, an old vinyl player placed, ironically, next to a new and fancy gaming console. most of the furniture was black, with the exception of the sofa and the armchair settled right next to it.

you stood in the hall, admiring the interior, while dongmin excused himself to his room.

and then you heard it.

a quiet meowing sound emerged from the kitchen and, soon enough, you were met with a tiny head full of black fur, green eyes carefully looking out from behind the kitchen island. the creature moved. slowly. carefully. assessing whether or not you were a threat to her meanwhile you stood frozen in place, eyes locked on the little ball of fur heading your way.

then the realisation hit.

dongmin has a little kitten.

a little kitten that was currently standing right at your feet, sniffing you with the carefulness so visible on her tiny face it almost made you melt right then and there.

‘i see you already met mochi.’

seeing her owner coming out from his room, mochi immediately ran up to him, a purr of satisfaction as dongmin scratched her behind the ears and patted her head gently. a warm sensation ran through your body at the sight of this sweet moment and you swore you’ve never seen dongmin smile as brightly as he did at his kitten right now.

‘i didn’t know you had a cat.’ you commented quietly, careful to not startle the kitten by being too loud.

‘yeah. i guess i don’t share that much about myself.’ dongmin’s answer came out almost like a whisper as he looked up at you from where he was crouching down. ‘wanna pet her?’

the sparkle in your eyes upon hearing that proposition was enough for the boy to know you were more than happy to do so, slowly but surely leaning down and eventually kneeling right next to him. you fought to ignore the uncomfortableness of your outfit as you did so, all your focus on mochi and her sweet purrs.

she noticed your presence and tensed up for a second, as if alerted of an intruder.

‘don’t worry, she won’t bite you.’ dongmin’s words cut through the sudden silence, a soft smile gracing his features. ‘reach out your hand slowly. let her get settled in with your presence.’

you did just as he said. mochi moved towards you slowly, big green eyes focused on your hand, then your face. she sniffed you just like before - this time a bit longer, as if deciding whether or not to trust you. you didn’t make another move, too afraid to startle her, but then you noticed mochi’s body leaning into your hand, almost asking for you to pet her.

and you obliged, with the biggest smile on your face, so in the moment that you didn’t notice dongmin’s soft gaze was not on mochi now, but rather on you, his smile barely noticeably growing bigger as well.

‘i also got you some clothes.’ dongmin mumbled after a minute or two, handing you a folded pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. ‘figured you’d want to change into something more comfortable after work. oh, and you can use the bathroom if you want to take a shower or anything. i’ll give you a towel.’

you thanked him quietly, tips of your ears turning red. you prayed he wouldn’t notice.

mochi could sense her time with you was slowly coming to an end by the way you stopped petting her for a moment and meowed, as if asking for her attention back. dongmin chuckled at her antics, gently taking her up into his arms as he stood up.

‘mochi seems quite fond of you already.’ he stated, giving the kitten light pats on the head. ‘that’s surprising. she usually hides in my room or under the sofa whenever new people come here.’

your face was beaming with satisfaction at that statement. being appreciated and chosen by people was surely a great feeling but getting that blessing from a kitten was on a whole other level and you weren’t exactly sure whether you’ll recover from that level of praise. you’ll probably be raving about it to your friends for the next few weeks, you thought.

‘i guess i’m just that likeable.’ you chuckled standing in front of the bathroom door as dongmin handed you the towel you intended to use. the boy nodded.

‘yeah. be careful, though. she might like you too much and you’ll have to come over here more often.’ he joked. you could feel your cheeks turning pink for some reason, that familiar tingling feeling settling in your stomach. his words shouldn’t have that type of effect - he didn’t even say anything about him wanting you there.

and yet the blush on your face continued to spread at a rapid pace after you closed the bathroom door and looked at your face in the mirror above the sink, exhaling a deep breath you didn’t even know you were holding in.

you could hear sounds of the tv when you exited the bathroom. dongmin’s shirt was loose on you, and you wondered whether the sweats he’s given you to wear were truly his - they seemed surprisingly small to belong to him, but you’ve chalked it down to them being from when he was younger.

dongmin’s eyes shot up from the tv when he heard you approaching. he was sitting down on the couch, legs spread comfortably, already having changed into some home appropriate clothes, too.

he looked up at you and, for a moment, his expression changed. it was barely noticeable - pupils dilating ever so slightly, the corner of his lip lifting up into a small smile.

‘the shirt suits you.’ he commented, back to his neutral expression, now facing the tv. ‘you should keep it.’

the comment left you a little puzzled and even more flustered than before as you sat down on the other end of the couch.

your eyes turned to the tv screen, watching as he searched through the game catalog on his console, the focus on his face indicating he was looking for something specific. soon enough, he found it - putting the controller down next to him to turn to you once more.

‘wanna play?’ his question echoed through the room, the boy motioning towards the tv screen. ‘or are you too tired after being so scatterbrained today?’

even in his words you could feel the slight smile tugging at his lips, your situation still greatly humoring him.

‘it’s not funny.’ you mumbled.

‘it very much is.’ he answered, the grin on his face only growing when he saw the annoyed look on your face. ‘come on, humor me. i can’t play this one alone.’

you looked at the screen then back at dongmin, eventually giving in. your fingers brushed his when you took the controller from him - the touch lingering just a second too long for you to disregard it, the warmth of his fingers being all that remained from it.

dongmin seemed unfazed, though, as he stood up from the couch under the excuse of going to get some snacks and quickly hit the bathroom. he came back soon after with a bowl of popcorn in hand, tactically placing it in between the two of you. instinctively, you scooted closer - now not occupying the very corner of the couch but rather the middle of it, close enough to comfortably reach for the snacks as he focused on turning the game on.

it was no secret that he was attractive, but you never really got to see him outside of the elevator run-ins and small talk on the way to your respective apartments. this time, though, you got a chance to finally look at dongmin - and somehow, from up close, he looked even better than from afar.

not only that, but he also had an annoyingly perfect side profile.

you redirected your focus onto the tv the moment his eyes moved, as if being caught staring would’ve been the end of the world. and maybe, in your head, it was - but for now, to not draw suspicion, all your focus was on the opening scene of the game.

it was extremely fun to play - apart from dongmin’s little digs at your skills and the annoying boss fight you had to finish with your eyes growing heavy and your focus shifting from the screen to the idea of going to sleep.

dongmin noticed.

he paused the game right after you’ve defeated the boss, earning an annoyed grumble from you.

‘come on, i was watching the cut scene!’

‘your eyes look like they’re struggling to stay open.’ he stated matter-of-factly, arms crossed as he looked at you. ‘you should probably get some sleep.’

you looked up at him, opening your eyes a little wider almost as if to prove a point.

‘nuh-uh. i’m good.’ you protested, body reclining further into the sofa. ‘i wanna watch a movie.’

dongmin raised his eyebrows, amused.

‘you won’t even survive through the first fifteen minutes.’ he stated, a sly grin pulling at the corners of his lips.

‘wanna bet on it?’ your words came out almost like a challenge and from the change in dongmin’s eyes you immediately knew he was in. ‘if you lose, you pay for my next groceries.’

‘and if you lose?’ he asked. you shook your head.

‘that won’t happen.’ you said confidently, arms crossed over your chest.

dongmin just chuckled, plopping down on the couch next to you.

‘sure it won’t.’

you woke up to the smell of clean sheets and coffee.

the pillows were soft and almost too comfortable, so much so that you didn’t want to move from the bed. the sheets shielded you from the outside world, keeping you warm and satisfied. but then your mind slowly started waking up and realising a few things. main one being that you do not remember falling asleep on the bed.

you jolted up into a sitting position too fast, your head feeling a little dizzy from the sudden motion. a few seconds passed and you stood up slowly, making your way out of dongmin’s room.

he was standing by the kitchen counter - back facing you, a one of his playlists playing quietly in the background. he was in his own world. mochi was walking around her owner, taking little steps as she looked up, hoping to see what dongmin was doing up there where she couldn’t reach.

although you tried your best to be quiet, dongmin still heard your steps as you approached the kitchen. he turned around, eyes scanning your still half-asleep frame and smiled softly.

‘good morning.’ he said, his focus back on whatever he was doing in the kitchen. ‘your coffee’s on the kitchen counter.’

you sat down on one of the tall stools, the smell of coffee already taking over your senses. a chuckle left your lips as you picked up the cup and examined it - it must’ve been a gift from one of his friends, a silly picture of dongmin and one of his friends wearing cherry-shaped hats adorning it. as much as you didn’t enjoy the bitterness of coffee most times, dongmin made the taste a perfect balance between sweet and bitter.

‘you lost the bet.’ dongmin broke the silence, setting two plates of homemade pancakes down on the kitchen counter: one in front of you, one in front of the empty chair next to you. ‘five minutes into the movie and you were already snoring on my arm.’

dongmin could see the embarrassment creeping up onto your face with each passing second, a laugh escaping his lips at the sight.

‘don’t tell me you carried me to your bed.’

‘i did.’

the tips of your ears were bright red by now. you decided to focus on eating to at least partially ignore heat that was now rising to your cheeks, too. but you couldn’t really stay quiet for too long.

‘so what do i have to do for losing?’ you asked, curiosity getting better of you instead of pretending the bet never took place. ‘you didn’t give any rules of your own.’

‘yeah. because you were oh so sure you’d win.’ he mumbled.

you shot him a deadly glare, fork halfway to your mouth.

‘alright, alright.’ he pleaded, hands up in a defensive position. ‘i think i have something in mind, though.’

‘hm?’

‘you have to come stop by my apartment more often.’ dongmin’s words were fast, so much so that if you weren’t listening intently you wouldn’t have been able to catch all the words. you caught the slight awkwardness in his voice, the way his eyes drifted away from you. ‘because mochi seems to like you a lot, you know.’

you smiled slightly, eyes falling down to the plate in front of you. any hopes of your cheeks not being flushed were long gone by now.

after a minute of silence, your eyes drifted to the side, towards where he was sitting. dongmin was already facing you, staring intently as if awaiting an answer.

‘well, i guess i cannot disappoint her then.’ you chuckled, taking another bite of your food. ‘i’ll just make sure that next time it won’t be a result of my stupidity.’

‘i don’t care what the reason is, as long as there is a next time.’

the way dongmin mumbled it quietly under his breath made you think he didn’t intend for the words to leave his lips - like a thought that he accidentally made out loud.

“Taesan, this is the guy I like…” you showed your cell phone to the dark-haired boy in front of you, while munching on some noodles, while in a restaurant that you guys combined to meet. He looked up to see the profile picture, and nodded his head upon seeing. “But uh, he's pretty cold when messaging…I don't think he actually likes me, y'know” you commented. He ate the stands of noodles before saying “Well, you told me that you didn't really really like him…So where is the problem?” he looked up at you. “Ugh, It's just I want a boyfriend so bad…” you say while letting your head fall down the table. It was not that. It was because you wanted to move on from the boy in front of you so badly that… “Well…you got me, y'know?” Taesan said, quite casually. Your ears burned. What did he mean by that? He quickly noticed what he said, cause he almost immediately threw the chopsticks and waved both of his hands “Ah…not in that…way! I mean- like a friend”, his cheeks and ears fully red.

“What?! It wasn't like that!” you cried, marching forward to run away from them.

“Yeah, okay…” one of your friends answered, and even if you couldn't see her, you knew she rolled her eyes.

It didn't take long for them bring more stories, but you always stopped them:

“But do you remember…” “DON'T YOU DARE…”.

They found it funny that you were really embarrassed about it, because why in the world would you think that your feelings didn't get reciprocated by Taesan, the Taesan, the most obvious and lovesick guy that they ever met.

Truth is, you couldn't see it, even the more obvious it was, because you always thought that there was no way that Han Taesan, the guy who, at uni, had a thousand girls at his feet, would ever like you?

Then, you felt an embrace, followed by both of your friend's arms appearing in your vision, while she, with her fingers, tried to zoom in on a non-existent cell phone…

“Ah…YN, you're too pretty here…” she says, still in a mockery tone, still imitating Taesan. “YA! Stop it” you groaned. 

Even if your friend stopped, you couldn't let those memories appear again…

You were showing your vacation photos that you took while on a trip to Taesan, most of them were taken by your pinterest addicted friend, and maybe why they looked so good. “This was at one random park…” you explained “it was a really beautiful scenario there, really pic worthy". But Taesan did not say a word, instead he started zooming the photo, reaching only your face. “You look…really pretty here” he mumbled, forming a slight smile. It made your face completely red, and after some minutes, his too.

You arrived at home, entering by the door, but still letting it open, just to sign a goodbye to your friends. As you made your way to collapse at the sofa, your cell phone started vibrating. You open it up noticing the notifications:

Messages App… 34 messages?!

From Taesan?!

You almost immediately unlock the phone, and in a matter of seconds you were already looking at the messages, reading them at such a crazy speed that surprised yourself.

Usually, reading fast can normally scramble the words, and easily misread, but not this case, because those words were already all messed up. 

fakeass emo⛓️🖤  

+33 owcsvaahjaaccsvdv

you

TAESAN???? WHATS WRONG BRO💔

fakeass emo⛓️🖤

ihann aannssdddd iiiiiiiiiii to much sojj 

you

are u drunk??? 🤨

fakeass emo ⛓️🖤

myybe???????

you

where are u now

fakeass emo ⛓️🖤

uhhhhhbbhhhhbbbbnnnnn bsar tghe cioool okne 

you

xxxxxxxx bar?

fakeass emo ⛓️🖤

yesssssssssssaaa sporinglre ptrincess

you

uh 😐 

You arrived there, almost not finding the black-haired, who had his head collapsed on the menu, while Leehan waved at you, somehow drunk but not as much as Taesan, and you waved back, smiling nervously.

“How much soju did he drink?” you asked Leehan, trying to get Taesan out of the chair “a…lot” he answered, quite seriously despite being tipsy. “I see you have too, do you want me to take you hom…”

Taesan, with his eyes half closed let a groan escape his mouth. Leehan lets out a small chuckle in response before explaining “I already got someone coming over for me, don't worry”.

He looks at Taesan and says something, but you didn't hear it, focused on getting Taesan out of the chair.

When you both finally arrived at his home, you didn't let Taesan leave. He was so drunk that you already knew how bad he would be the next morning, completely involved in a hangover.

“Wait” you said, looking straight at him, “stay here for a while, ok?”.

He only hummed a response looking at you, his eyes half closed, half awake, since he had been sleeping all the way home.

You went to the convenience store, took a hangover medicine, checked out, and fastly and then were already at your car's door. Taesan was still with his adorable half-closed eyes, locking with yours across the window.

Something started fluttering with your chest, that made you grip the small medicine's cardboard packaging.

You open the car's door, handing the small cardboard box to the black-haired, “drink it” you ordered, still outside the car.

He takes it, takes out the small straw that was glued to the packaging and drinks it, then shyly gives the packaging back.

“Thank… you” he murmured slowly, looking up at you. 

“You're too nice, y'know?” he commented, bringing himself more to the light of the car, his eyes glossy, hair messy, flushed cheeks.

“I-” he starts, lowering his head leaving the light from the car “I- think you're so pretty…too…smart…uh- Leehan told me to talk about…it with you…but uh…I don't want to…stop our uh friendship…” he looks back at you, your ears bright red “look at you…!” he chuckles “too cute…” he frowns “I'm…so stupid…Y'know, I shouldn't have those feelings…I should keep it to myself…They are stupid…”

“I’m making a mistake right? I'll probably regret this once I sober up…”

A tear drops at his jeans.

Oh no.

He is shaking. Oh…

But you finally got it. You let a small smile escape.

“Taesan!” you say “do you want to know something?”

He looks at you, his eyes still showing a sign of drowsiness, but intense. 

“This doesn’t need to be a mistake” 

You move closer, still standing in front of the open car door, but positing your hands for sustentation on the seat beside him, slowly reaching his lips with yours.

Just a small peck.

But enough to make you both start smiling like fools.

“Thank…you” he says, upon breaking the small peck.

・・・・・

bnd taglist: @ziziforsan

actually, scratch that. working with han taesan is not for you.

you don’t know what you did, but you’re almost 100% sure he has a personal vendetta against you. for such a pretty face, his mouth only spits out the nastiest of things, at least to you.

actually, scratch that again. han taesan only does that to you.

because you shared all the core modules with him, you had foolishly decided to group up with him for all the assignments you had in your first semester of university. to put it simply, that was probably the worst decision you’d made in your life.

why? for every idea you gave, he’d step over with another. for every suggestion you offered, he’d pinpoint every aspect to shut it down. sure, he may have had better ideas, but you didn’t think it was necessary to stomp at your input so readily. you definitely didn’t think it was necessary to smirk like he’d won a battle after every instance.

you thought you’d be able to escape his belittling remarks and irritating smugness after that one semester, but why did he have to share the same plans as you as well? the day you stepped into the student council office and saw him sitting in the seat next to yours, you already felt dread clawing at you.

fast forward to the present, you’re both running for student president for the next year. you had already lost the role of vice president to him this year, so you’re determined to not let him pick at you again. not that he could even if he wanted to, because you practically transform into an iron shield whenever he enters your vision (which is more times than you’d liked, considering you share the same environment with him everywhere. he seems to enjoy this, though).

you’ve been preparing diligently for your student president pitch, but that’s also on top of having 5 tight assignment deadlines and planning the biannual festival happening in the next month. for the past weeks, the student council office had turned into your place to work, eat, and even sleep, though the last was never intentional.

today, again, you’re sitting at your desk, your laptop opened in front of you, but it’s unlike usual—a cup of hot-turned-lukewarm tea next to you, a pile of tissues scattered around the table, an oversized hoodie draped over your frame, your sniffles echoing across the empty room, and your body which felt heavier than usual.

you’ve tried your hardest fighting the urge to fall asleep, the dimness of the room not helping, but when the clock struck 3, you decide to give yourself mercy and lean forward, resting your head on your arms over the table. it’s far from comfortable; your back is aching, your neck is sore, your nose is uncooperative, and the screech of the door is hurting your head.

you open your eyes briefly at the intruder by the door. they’re frozen for a beat, as if surprised to see you there, then they’re tilting their head in what seems to be confusion. soon, they’re taking small steps towards you. you should be alarmed, but your defenses have shut down from the fatigue, so all you can think is that if you die, you hope you die a climactic death.

the intruder, thankfully, does not appear to have any intent of killing you. they are, however, intent on disturbing you.

“y/n?” there’s a soft tap on your shoulder. you squint, trying to decipher the blurry face in front of you before deciding against it. your act of protest comes out as a small whine that unintentionally escapes the back of your dry throat.

the figure stands there in shock, hand hovering your back. they blink a few times, as if trying to register what they just heard, before they decide to squat next to you, patting your shoulder again.

“y/n? don't sleep here.” the voice is familiar, but uncharacteristically soft. and fond. why is it fond?

you open your eyes again. seeing han taesan mere inches away from your face is something you’d never expect, but you’re too tired to even be shocked. instead, you blink slowly, as if you’re a newborn reacting to stimuli you’ve never experienced before.

“han taesan,” you mumble against your arm. your voice comes out nasally from your cold and as a result, more whiny than usual.

“y–yes?” he ignores the stutter and moves his hand to brush away the strands of hair covering your face. it comes so naturally that he freezes when he realises and quickly pulls his hand back to himself.

“prick.” you shut your eyes as you say this, missing the widening of his eyes. “annoying.”

he frowns, “i'm annoying?”

“very.” you don’t miss a beat to reply. “why do i have to see you everywhere . . . .” you trail off, your voice decreasing in volume as you speak.

taesan is silent for a few moments, during which the only sounds that can be heard are the tick-tock of the clock and the whirs of the air conditioner. he takes one glance at your hoodie and the tissues around you before promptly turning off the AC.

“fine,” he huffs as he stands up. “i’ll be annoying for a bit more.” he taps your shoulder again. “go home. you can't sleep here. it's so late.”

the deprivation of sleep is getting to you, because your immediate response to him is to let out another whine that would immediately shatter your image of the cool senior and president-to-be if anyone heard you.

which, of course, brings us back to the first line.

taesan is flustered.

he’s never seen you this… babyish before. ever since the first semester, all you would entertain him with were glares, furrowed eyebrows, and the occasional roll of your eyes if you were really salty. you had never been this defenseless around him, to which he feels something tug at his chest.

he stretches his lips into a line and squats down again. “what do you want me to do then?” his voice is soft. too soft. “i’m not letting you sleep overnight here.”

you slowly open your eyes, sniffling as you look at him in disbelief. “if you're not willing to carry me home, just go.” you shut your eyes again.

it’s silent once again. at this, you dig your face deeper into your arms, having zero expectations. you furrow your eyebrows slightly when you hear shuffles above you, followed by the clash of stationeries, the crackle of the plastic bag-slash-makeshift trash bin, the sudden cease of the whirring of your laptop fan, and finally the sound of a zipper.

you open your eyes in time to see taesan cupping your face in one hand and pulling your arm with the other to make you sit up. you let yourself be handled without evident resistance, though your confusion is blatant. once he sees that you’re up, he quickly squats down in front of you, back facing you.

“climb up. this annoying prick will carry you home.”

from bliss. this may or may not be insanely self-indulgent due to a cold i may or may not have. i also may or may not have thoughts about a pt. 2. (edit: pt. 2 is out!)

anw, first post! just fitting for it to be about han taesan bcs this man (read: bnd as a whole) has been living in my brain for the past month (case in point: me literally writing this note at 3am when my headache is killing me).

i hope this was as enjoyable to read as it was for me to write <3

you stand outside his dorm, shifting on your feet as you wait. when the door finally opens, it’s not taesan... it’s jaehyun. he leans against the doorway, a smirk already in place like he was expecting this.

"well, look who it is," he drawls, arms crossed. "taesan’s boyfriend."

you roll your eyes, used to his antics. "is he ready?"

"oh, he’s ready, alright," jaehyun says, stepping aside so you can see inside.

taesan is sitting on the couch, pretending he doesn’t hear anything, but the tips of his ears are red. woonhak, who’s sitting beside him, nudges him not-so-subtly.

"you sure you’re going out?" woonhak teases. "you never take anyone shopping. not even us."

"shut up," taesan mutters, standing up and brushing invisible dust off his jeans. he looks effortlessly cool, as always. baggy black ripped jeans, a vintage band tee, silver jewelry catching the light. "we’re leaving."

jaehyun grins. "aww, look at him. he’s flustered."

"i’m not flustered," taesan says, clearly flustered.

woonhak elbows him. "make sure to buy your boyfriend something nice."

taesan glares at him before grabbing your wrist and dragging you out, his grip warm but firm. you hear jaehyun and woonhak laughing as the door shuts behind you.

"ignore them," he mutters, still not meeting your eyes.

"i don’t mind," you say, smiling. "they’re not wrong, though. you never ask me to go shopping with you."

taesan exhales, rubbing the back of his neck. "yeah, well… i thought it’d be nice. that’s all."

you don’t push him on it, even though your heart flutters a little. instead, you just squeeze his hand and let him lead the way.

the mall is buzzing with life, neon lights reflecting off polished floors, the air filled with the scent of food from the nearby food court. taesan walks beside you, hands stuffed into his pockets, looking as effortlessly cool as ever.

"so what are we looking for?" you ask, peeking at him.

he shrugs. "clothes. maybe some accessories."

"you planning on getting anything specific?"

he hesitates for a moment before glancing at you. "i was thinking… maybe you could get something too."

"me?"

"yeah." he looks away, pretending to be interested in a store display. "something that matches me."

you blink, processing his words.

taesan, who has always been particular about his aesthetic, wants you to match him?

you try to hold back a grin. "so you want us to match?"

he groans, dragging a hand down his face. "don’t make it weird."

"it’s not weird. it’s cute."

"oh my god..."

you laugh, bumping your shoulder against his. "alright, let’s find something."

the first store you step into is one of those alternative fashion boutiques, dim lighting and rock music playing overhead. taesan immediately seems more at home here, flipping through racks of clothing with ease.

you, on the other hand, are a little less familiar with his style. you like how he dresses, obviously, he looks good in everything... but pulling off the same look yourself is a different story.

taesan seems to notice because he pulls out a black graphic tee and holds it up to your chest. "this would look good on you."

"you think so?"

"yeah. here, try this too." he grabs a silver chain necklace, placing it over your palm. "and maybe these rings."

you watch as he gathers more items, fully invested in styling you. it’s endearing, really, seeing him this focused. eventually, he shoves a pile of clothes into your arms and nods towards the fitting rooms.

"try them on."

"yes, sir." you salute playfully before slipping into the fitting room.

as you change, you realize how much this actually means to him. taesan isn’t the type to do things half-heartedly. if he wants you to match his style, it’s because he wants you to be part of his world in some way.

when you step out, taesan is leaning against the wall, scrolling through his phone. he looks up, and for a moment, he just… stares.

"…well?" you prompt.

he blinks, clears his throat, and looks away. "it’s good."

"just good?"

"great. it’s great." he rubs the back of his neck, avoiding your gaze. "you should get it..."

you grin. "you’re so bad at hiding your feelings, you know that?"

"shut up."

but when you catch his reflection in the mirror, you see the small smile playing on his lips.

after picking out a few more pieces (including a matching leather jacket that taesan insists isn’t couple wear, even though it totally is), you both head to the register.

as the cashier rings up your items, taesan pulls out his wallet.

"i got it," he says before you can protest.

"taesan—"

"just let me." he doesn’t look at you, focused on tapping his card against the machine. "i want to."

your heart does that stupid fluttering thing again. you don’t argue. instead, you reach for his hand, intertwining your fingers.

"thanks," you say softly.

he squeezes your hand in response.

after taesan pays for your clothes, you don’t let go of his hand. instead, you tug him toward another store, a mischievous glint in your eyes.

"where are we going?" he asks, though he doesn’t resist.

"you got to dress me up in your style," you say, stopping in front of a streetwear boutique, the kind with oversized hoodies, cargo pants, and chunky sneakers displayed in the windows. "now it’s my turn."

taesan looks at the store, then at you, eyes narrowing slightly. "no."

"yes."

"absolutely not."

"taesan," you say, giving him your best pleading look. "come on, it’s only fair."

he exhales through his nose, like he’s already regretting every decision leading up to this moment. "i don’t wear streetwear."

"it’s not that different from your usual style," you argue. "it’s just… a little less emo, a little more cool boyfriend energy."

"i already have cool boyfriend energy."

"let me prove you could have more."

he glares at you, but there’s no real heat behind it. after a long pause, he mutters, "fine. one outfit."

you grin, dragging him inside before he can change his mind.

picking out clothes for taesan is fun—mostly because he’s so reluctant about it.

"try this," you say, handing him a beige oversized hoodie.

he stares at it like it personally offended him. "why is it this color?"

"neutral tones are in."

"i wear black."

"expand your horizons."

taesan groans but takes it anyway. you pile on more, cargo pants, a crossbody bag, sneakers that aren’t his usual beat-up converse. by the time you’re done, he’s looking at the fitting room like it’s a death sentence.

"i hate you," he says before stepping inside.

"you love me," you call back.

when he finally steps out, you can’t help but stare.

the oversized hoodie drapes over him perfectly, the cargo pants fitting just right. the streetwear aesthetic somehow works on him, making him look effortlessly stylish but in a different way than usual.

"see?" you say, grinning. "you look good."

taesan folds his arms. "i feel weird."

"you look hot." you say, holding back the urge to fully make out with him right then and there.

his ears turn pink. "shut up."

"no, seriously, you could wear this all the time and no one would question it." you approach him, admiring your work. "just imagine, us walking around in our matching outfits. everyone would be jealous."

"you’re insufferable," he mumbles, but you can see the way his lips twitch, like he’s trying not to smile.

"so… are you gonna get it?"

he hesitates, looking at himself in the mirror.

and then, to your surprise, he sighs. "yeah, whatever."

your jaw drops. "wait, really?"

he shrugs, shoving his hands in his pockets. "you like it, right?"

you smirk playfully. "no..."

taesan stands there, stunned, "what? then why-"

"i absolutely love it"

before you can say anything else, he grabs the clothes and heads toward the register, leaving you standing there, absolutely smitten.

the sun is starting to set by the time you leave the mall, the sky painted in shades of orange and pink. taesan carries the shopping bag in one hand, his other still holding yours.

"so," you say, swinging your intertwined hands slightly, "was this a date?"

he scoffs. "obviously."

"oh? so you’re saying you planned this because you wanted to spend time with me?"

"i mean, yeah?" he glances at you like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. "why else?"

you grin. "just making sure."

he rolls his eyes but doesn’t let go of your hand.

when you get back to his dorm, jaehyun and woonhak are waiting.

"back already?" jaehyun muses.

woonhak eyes your bags. "did you guys get matching clothes?"

taesan doesn’t answer, but his grip on the shopping bag tightens.

jaehyun smirks. "oh my god, you did."

woonhak gasps dramatically. "that’s so cute."

"shut up." taesan pushes past them, dragging you with him into his room. before he closes the door, you hear jaehyun laughing.

"taesan, you’re so whipped!"

taesan groans, pressing his forehead against the door. "i hate them."

"you don’t."

"i do."

you laugh, wrapping your arms around his waist. "well, i like them. they make you flustered, which is adorable."

he sighs, leaning into your touch. "you’re lucky i like you."

"i know," you tease, resting your chin on his shoulder.

he turns his head slightly, pressing a soft kiss to your temple.

"but don’t push it."

you just smile, holding him a little tighter.

just as you’re basking in the warmth of taesan’s arms, the door suddenly swings open.

"alright, lovebirds, break it up—"

jaehyun’s voice cuts off as he takes in the scene: you wrapped around taesan, his head resting lightly against yours. taesan barely has time to react before woonhak appears behind jaehyun, eyes widening.

"oh my god," woonhak breathes, pointing accusingly. "you guys are so gross."

taesan tenses immediately. "get out."

"no way," jaehyun grins, crossing his arms. "not before we see you in those matching outfits."

taesan scowls. "not happening."

woonhak gasps dramatically. "but taesan, you spent all that money. what a waste."

jaehyun nods sagely. "yeah, what a shame. if only there were some way to make sure the outfits were worth it. like, i don’t know… wearing them right now?"

taesan looks like he’s considering murder. you, on the other hand, are having the time of your life.

"you know what?" you say, squeezing taesan’s waist. "they’re right."

"don’t encourage them," taesan groans.

"too late!" woonhak cheers, already pushing the door open wider. "put it on, hyung. let us bask in the couple aesthetic."

"i will actually throw you both out," taesan warns.

"so violent," jaehyun sighs. "is this what love does to a man?"

woonhak shakes his head, looking at you sympathetically. "you deserve better."

you snort. "nah, i think i’ll keep him."

taesan groans even louder, but at this point, he knows he’s lost.

"fine," he mutters. "but if i do this, you two are never speaking of it again."

jaehyun and woonhak exchange looks.

I feel like Taesan would be the nonchalant, popular, emo bad boy that every woman and man alike would want to throw themselves at. He just has that rocker persona that captures everybody’s interest. And you’re no exception.

You’d never spoken to him, only ever seeing him walk into lecture with his new flavor of the week. Everyone knew about his playboy reputation, but when he looks that good who cares that he just sleeps around? You usually sat in the back of the lecture hall, like you currently were, having a perfect view of the door. The layered clothing and heavy metal chains clanking around as he walked in always alerted you of his presence, as if you weren’t already staring at the door waiting for him to walk in.

Everybody knew him from the rock band he was in and that’s when your obsession with him grew. Thoughts of him playing the electric guitar, the way he’d put the guitar pick in his mouth during the end of the show, only to show it lying on his tongue, (lowkey inspired by Huening Kai leaving the guitar pick in his mouth during growing pain) the way his fingers would pluck the strings so skillfully, or the thought of how he could use those fingers on you.

The thought of his hands roaming your body, plunging two fingers in you while his mouth would go to work on your clit had you clenching your thighs in the middle of class. You looked around, hoping no one would see you in this state of heat. Quietly, you get up, making your way to single, gender neutral bathroom.

You wasted no time hoisting up your skirt, rubbing yourself through your panties to tease yourself. ‘Mhmm Taesan…’ you’d moan into your own touch, pushing your panties aside to stick a finger into yourself. You knew it was wrong, but you didn’t care, thoughts of Taesan having his way with you consuming your entire being. You were deep into pleasuring yourself, adding another finger, desperately trying to hit that spot in you that was so difficult reach. ‘Taesan… please’ another moan rolls off your tongue.

‘I thought I heard someone moaning my name’

You were so lost in pleasuring yourself that you hadn’t noticed that you didn’t lock the door. Then it finally hit you, the position you were in: standing in the corner of the unisex stall, two fingers deep inside yourself while Taesan was standing right in front of you, holding on his face the sexiest smirk you’d ever seen. You couldn’t believe what was happening to you, absolutely mortified as you stumble over your words, pathetic apologies falling from your lips.

‘If you’re so sorry, why are your fingers still inside of you? Does me watching you turn you on?’

You wanted to cry at how embarrassed you felt, absentmindedly nodding at his words. ‘Put on a show for me then. I’d love to see how desperate you get’ and you can’t get yourself to look away as you continue your previous actions, one, two, three tears dripping down your face as you continue pushing your fingers inside yourself.

‘Go on, moan my name like you were before, you dirty slut. I don’t even know you and here you are, moaning out my name like a fucking mantra’ he laughs in your face making the humiliation you felt worse. You can’t help the way he’s degrading you, making you clench on your own fingers, clear fluid running down your hands and dripping onto the floor. Tears cascading down your face now, unable to hold them back any longer.

But Taesan walks up to you, wiping some of your tears away with his fingers before tilting your head up to meet his gaze. ‘So good for me, my little slut, maybe I can help you out a little?’ He dips his finger down to your exposed cunt, gently trailing his fingers along your slit as he never breaks eye contact. You gasp, leaning into his touch as he does exactly what you were imagining earlier, plunging two fingers inside of you. You throw your head back but he stops. ‘If you wanna cum, you’re gonna have to look at me.’ You were already turned on beyond belief, bucking your hips into has fingers as you look him directly in the eyes. ‘Good girl.’

His fingers were long, hitting that spot in you with ease. You couldn’t help but moan his name out, sending shivers down his spine at how sweet your voice sounded in his ear. He couldn’t help the blood that rushed through him, his arousal evident by the imprint on his jeans. ‘Fuck darling, clenching around my fingers already,’ he says as you nod, letting yourself go as you cum a second time within 5 minutes. You’re panting, already fucked out as you lean back against the wall for support.

‘Oh cmon love, help me out a little? You kinda owe me,’ he says, watching as your eyes travel down to the obvious tent in his pants. Not that you would’ve objected, but his cockiness has you on your knees almost instantly. You look up through, tear-stained face turning him on even more as you slowly unbutton his jeans, pulling them down along with his boxers.

He watches in agony as you tease him, pulling out his length before giving little kitten licks to the tip. His sweetly tangles his fingers in your hair before harshly pushing your mouth along his length. You don’t complain thought, gripping the back of his lends, determined to give him the best head he’s ever received. Taking as much as you can, licking around, base to tip before going back in. His groans only drive you further, deep throating him as he cums soon after, and swallowing it.

‘Damn baby, what’s your name? Maybe we can do this again sometime?’

‘Y/N’ you choke out, throat dry. ‘Y/N. Come find me after class. This isn’t over yet’ he says before exiting the bathroom, leaving you there to clean yourself up.

༄ ༄ ༄

idk what came over me while writing this 😅