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The fact that I made a Spidersona whose whole thing is Being Up In Hobie's Face is because if Hobie Brown was real and I had the privilege of working with him
I would in fact be, All Up In Hobie's Face.
Like.. Look at that face!! Sculpted by the gods!!!
And it's like I could do that because you can't even tell me I'm being unreasonable or over-exagerating cause look at him!!!!
What, you want me to just pretend he's ugly? You want me to make believe that he isn't fine? NO!!
I got every reason in the world to be. Can't even tease me over it.
Like 'What are you starin' so hard at me for?π€π'
Shut the hell up you know what I'm staring at. You know you cute. Don't even try to play. Now shut up you're distracting me from staring π³
Like forreal if you met him wouldn't you be like 'this dude is funny and cool and handsome and PUNK and also he hasn't told me to piss off and kick rocks yet so until he DOES imma just follow him around and laugh real hard at his corny ass jokes mkay?'
Well, that's one way to say 'thank you'. | Its tea time, innit. (Hobie x DiscoSpider Diane)
A.N: This was SO SO fun to draw and I'm really happy with how it came out :') - Also, I hid a lot of personal fanon-lore in this drawing so, here's some easter eggs below! As always, huge thanks to @the-kr8tor!
Easter Eggs:
Hobie lives on a boat with his lovely stray boatcats.
Hobie is proudly Jamaican (in my head).
His favorite colour is Green, though only Diane knows that.
Hobie didn't tell her, but somehow she managed to figure it out on her own.
Someone asked him, but before he could answer, she simply said 'Green'.
When he later asked her how she'd known, Diane told him it was obvious.
His carpet was green, and so was his bonnet, and his favorite shirt - to her it just made sense.
He calls her Duchess, since their first night out.
Diane sleeps with her guitar pick necklace on her left wrist.
She says she's afraid if she wears it to bed, it'll choke her to death in her sleep.
Hobie tells her that's not possible - considering she's superhuman. Green Goblin could hardly choke her out if he wanted to.
She doesn't believe him. She's 'not taking no chances'.
Diane only sleeps in high quality pastel pajama sets - with fuzzy socks to match. Hobie is the type of guy to turn any shirt into a 'sleep shirt' if he owns it long enough.
Diane likes her nails long, acrylic, and consistently manicured.
Hobie could never. After raiding Diane's extensive varnish collection, he paints every finger a different color. Sure, he could pick one. That's no fun, though!
When Hobie is enamored - or near Diane - his outline with turn her favorite color, pink!
Not only that, when Hobie's being a loverboy, pink origami hearts may start fluttering around his head - literally.
Diane knows Hobie's tea order by heart.
Another thing she'd learned by sheer observation.
Irish Breakfast tea, not British. One sugar, not too sweet, with the bag steeped a little too long.
He likes it 'her-coloured' - tea with just enough milk to match the tone of her skin. Anymore makes it taste 'like rubbish', in his opinion.
Hobie endorses tax evasion.
Happy Octobie Week #3!
Remember, if you have a spidersona, you can do whatever you want forever <3
Gold chains instead of silver spikes. Gator shoes in place of thrifted boots. And an afro bigger than Hobie's -
Spider-Funk is Hobart Brown - Earth 831
Hobie Brown maybe Artie's chiller, rougher, and louder self - but somehow, they get on like a cop car on fire (or whatever the saying is).
And Artie Brown maybe Hobie's cockier, flirtier, and flashier self - but they just tell people they're twins.
Or at the very least - they call each other 'brotha' and 'bruv' all the time.
When people ask about the accent thing - you know, Artie being American, they say 'Ever seen The Parent Trap?'
[A LONG ASS post - Below is Artie's Origins, Fighting Style, Relationship to Hobie, and how he got recruited - All About the Brown Bros! Artie & Hobie, FunkPunk!]
It's Hobie 2 - Electric Bugaloo!
And just when Miguel thought he could only stomach one of them.
Though he calls himself the older brother, being born over a decade earlier, Artie is Hobie's less mature, more materialistic, but just as kind variant.
He's a pacifist instead of an anarchist - Full of Soul instead of bursting with Rock.
And he still hates cops.
Origins:
When Artie was drafted for the Vietnam War in 1969 - the first thing he did was burn his draft card. Then he joined the Black Liberation Army.
He wasn't the only one - Artie was part of the almost half a million draftees to do so.
And then President Osborn was elected.
To fill the gap in enlistment, Osborn came up with a solution.
V.E.N.O.M - A highly toxic, unfeelingly aggressive, and wildly bloodthirsty symbiote. A solution to the protests and draft dodgers.
Engineered by Oscorp - if you didn't induct yourself as a soldier, the V.E.N.O.M would make you one. And suddenly his friends were disappearing one by one.
A subtle but sudden-onset disease, the V.E.N.O.M variant was nearly undetectable, very persuasive, and incredibly effective.
More primal than animalistic, the symbiote's function didn't raise one's bloodlust, - instead it lowered, and at worse cancelled, your empathy.
The symbiote subtly normalized dehumanization - attacking neurons in the cerebral cortex to destroy one's capability of empathy, compassion, and at times - recognizing faces. Able to follow commands without a second thought - the perfect soldier.
Convincing the host of necessary order and their own biological superiority, over the course of 72 hours the host would lose their ability to recognize the people around them as anything other than sub-human.
In 138, V.E.N.O.M turns you into an animal.
In 831, V.E.N.O.M turns everyone around you into an animal.
It could make anyone into an unfeeling, unrelenting soldier - no guns needed.
The best of them got sent overseas to the War - and the rest, he turned on the people, hunting down all those who dared to dodge their call.
While on tour in DC, Artie was bitten by a radioactive spider, as he attempted to burn draft papers at a government facility.
He burned the papers. Plus he got some sick powers out of it. Plus Plus he gets to beat up The National Guard on a weekly basis. Ain't that a score.
And Hobie may hate the name Spider-Punk (or so he says), but Artie loves being Spider-Funk.
He calls them Funk & Punk. Hobie calls them that too, but like in a cool ironic way.
Artie & Hobie:
Personality:
Hobie knows that Artie is going through his 'Pavitr Phase', so he cuts him some slack. Artie's only been Funk for a year and some change.
He's got more Ws than Ls, so he's always one to be a bit cocky and reckless - though never at anyone's expense.
He's more talkative than Hobie - and WAY more flirty than Hobie, ready to wink at anyone willing to stare.
Like Hobie, Artie has his own groupies. And the pair on campus do get stares (and whispers. and giggles); Two 6'5 dudes with enough hair to cause an eclipse, walking around in loud ass boots, they're sure to draw attention.
Something Artie loves.
Artie considers himself a Ladies' Man. And a Man's Man. And what gender you have to offer really. (He's still a 'Hobie' - he doesn't discriminate)
He's got a waterbed in his boathouse, shag carpets, and wine at the ready. He loves sweet-talking people, and showering them in compliments. Whereas Hobie's love language is Physical Touch, Artie's is Words of Affirmation.
But all Hobie has to do is open his mouth and Be British and suddenly Artie's date is swooning and he's like 'Brotha, I'mma need you to shut the hell up for a second right quick.'
If you hang out with them, get ready for Hobie hanging off your shoulder, while Artie is in your ear complimenting your outfit.
Fighting:
Artie's fighting style is a lot more fluid than Hobie's with a lot of martial arts involved - similar to blaxploitation movies of the era.
Hobie thinks he looks bloody ridiculous meanwhile Artie is like 'if dem damn jeans weren't so tight maybe you could get like me and have some flair in your fight, my man.'
He also has an INCREDIBLY MEAN backhand.
Ideology:
The two of them are fairly close, hanging out with each other a lot. Though the two of them are fairly different. Artie is far more pacifist than Hobie, but that doesn't mean he's above violence.
He's just not one to talk about it, or threaten it. He's more of the 'let people talk - don't start none, won't be none'. Camp - and he'll almost never throw the first punch. Though he absolutely considers intimidation, selling hard drugs, and fucking with the general population 'starting some'.
Their ideology may clash heads everyone once in a while, but they hardly ever fight. At all. Instead, they have frequently heated, in-depth debates.
Artie may not be as radical or educated on things as Hobie, plus Hobie has ten years of extra history to pull from, but the two of them do it often, and it keeps them spry.
The only problem is, they get so into it, it SO HARD to understand what they're saying. Accents, slang, cutting each other off, roping other people into the conversation to back them up. It's WILD.
Artie is a lot more materialistic than Hobie. Not as critical of capitalism, Artie likes to game it rather than complain about it.
Unlike Hobie, Artie LOVES the finer things in life, and spoiling those around him. He likes gold over silver, and wears more rings than spikes.
He's a bit full of himself, and he carries a rag in his pocket to whip blood off his nice white boots. Something Hobie wouldn't be caught DEAD doing.
And Hobie clowns him for it everytime. Artie doesn't care. 'True playas never play sloppy.'
But how can he afford all of this? Well,
He's not as uhh,..honest as Hobie. But he has a heart of gold (get it?). And he never lies just to lie - if he's doing it, it's probably for work, or to Miguel, because he does not respect Miguel.
Artie be stealing. He's a master at sleight of hand. If it's a big corporation, it's free game. He never steals money - but to put it concisely: He's a smooth mfer.
He likes gold - he thinks it looks nice. But he knows for a fact that the worth of it is completely manufactured my human and capitalism, and that it's literally just a pretty metal.
He knows that paying hundreds for a chain or gold is exploitative, especially when it's stolen to begin with. So to him, it's justifiable, gimmie.
He also does it mostly for fun, a magic trick - in the same way Hobie makes stuff 'disappear' while talking to Miles, and doing hand tricks.
Artie does that, but more often, and more skillfully.
He doesn't do it all the time, but the first time he did it in front of Hobie - snatching Hobie's homemade watch of his wrist - Hobie was genuinely surprised.
Mostly he does it to make things disappear from your hand, parts he finds lying around, and playing pranks on people like Miguel. Generally, just being a lil shit.
He's a sweet-talker and a big steppa.
Unlike Hobie, Artie knows better than you force his way in. Artie slides in. He can talk them in to anywhere.
He'll pretend to be someone else, pretend to know someone else, steal passes and key cards to get in, and try to attack from the shadows when he can.
In battle, Spider-Punk is the louder, chattier, more immature one. And Spider-Funk is the chiller, sarcastic one.
Like twins, the two of them have their own in-jokes, and they hang at each other's places all the goddamn time. Though they live in different universes and decades, Artie & Hobie are kinda a package deal.
They may not always be together - they both got their own shit to do and they're not actually brothers - but if you hang with one, it's only a matter of time before you meet the other.
"Why is your brother American?"
"Divorce." - "Adoption."
........
"Adoption." - "Divorce."
"One of you or the both of you are lying."
Diane & Artie & Annie -
[This section is about my main OC Disco-Spider Diane, and her variant Annie P. Disco-Spider is Hobie's....something and they are happily....a something]
Every Hobart needs his Diane, and Artie is no different.
Artie & Diane:
And like usual, it all starts at the beginning.
Diane was the one to recruit Artie - because of course she was. And Lyla had told her two things: He was a guitarist, and his name was Artie. That's all she needed to know.
Lyla wanted it to be a surprise.
She snuck back stage to his show, brushed off the nearly palpable feeling of deja vu in the air, broke into his dressing room, and then tried to flirt him into joining the Society. Easy peasy.
Diane is a very oblivious woman. They spoke for nearly 10 minutes - and Artie decided to hear her out. He sat down on the couch in his dressing room, pulled back his hair and-
Diane goes -
"Hobie??? Is that you?! Oh my goodddd, you look so cute! Your hair!! Hobarrrrt - Why you ain't say nothing, had me standing here doing all this."
Speech completely forgotten. Mind you, she still hasn't explained anything. Diane is destined to freak out every Hobart she meets.
Artie is starting to think he should stop flirting with weird ass groupies that break into his dressing room.
Diane takes out her watch, the watch he doesn't know she has. She pulls up Lyla, the AI he doesn't know she has. And Diane asks her -
"Lyla! Does Artie stand for-"
"It does!"
"Oh my god!!! That makes this SO much easier! You're soo sweet, awww!!"
"You know I saw the mission and thought of you-"
"Am I on drugs right now?"
Needless to say - Diane's recruitment was successful.
Diane and Artie actually get on well, really well. Like weirdly well.
Artie and Diane are both extroverted, flirty, and a bit full of themselves. They're expressive, and more into their hair than they're willing to admit. They're perfect for each other - and people notice.
And Diane finds it a TAD BIT WEIRD
I mean, the differences between her and Hobie is what Diane loves about them - they're like sugar and spice, PB and J.
Sometimes Artie and Diane may accidentally finish each other's sentences - and Diane will be like 'Hey don't do that :)'. Other times, Artie will playfully be like 'Why are you standing so close to me, mama?' Just to piss her off.
Of course, Diane thinks he's 'cute'. But not Hobie Cute. And unfortunately, he 'speaks American'.
Besides, Hobie is the only Hobart for her.
Artie is definitely into Diane, but more in the 'she's a catch I would go for' kinda way. He did hit on her a couple times early on in their situation - but once she made it clear that she was 'seeing Hobie', he took the hint.
There's no jealously there - Hobarts are incapable of it. In fact, he's kinda proud the only other guy who could pull the hot girl is ..another him.
Now, Artie is a lot more like a big brother, kinda like the ones Diane grew up with in the Panther's house.
He's protective of her, in a 'Be mean to her and I'll deliver an ass whoppin on a plate' way. He thinks she's cute in the way a platonic sense, and finds her groupie mode to be as amusing as it is adorable.
It's ironic though that his ACTUAL girlfriend is - well, Diane's Opposite.
Artie & Annie:
[This section is shorter, and will be longer in Annie's post]
Diane Pastors is Annie P. is Mod-Spider.
Artie's girlfriend, Annie is the farthest thing from Diane while somehow still being just as big of a diva.
An avid feminism campaigner and modern woman, she would never be caught DEAD hanging off of Artie like that. And she can't stomach Diane all that much.
Hobie, Annie HATES. And not in a coy way. She thinks he's obnoxious - she calls him a poseur. She thinks he's a scrub.
Her & Artie are in a committed relationship - officially boyfriend and girlfriend. And instead of Annie, Artie is the one who wears her name on a chain.
Just like Diane and Hobie, Annie and Artie have a musical duo - called ModFunk.
We're almost done I PROMISE.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Random Details:
Artie's design is an inverted version of Hobie's, but it's also inspired heavily by Jimi Hendrix, mainly this photo on the left.
Right is an example of Artie's Style. His universe has a paint-marker aesthetic, a lot more colorful and soft than Hobie's, with dripping paint and splatters, but it tones down a lot - like Gwen's.
Artie plays Soul, Jazz, and Funk.
He has a band with his version of Daredevil, Felicia Hardy, and Captain Anarchy.
Artie has killed cops - and soldiers before. But he doesn't see it as a big deal. He hates cops, but he doesn't focus on it. He doesn't discriminate. Ass Whoopin's for everybody.
He DOES pull his hair back, his face isn't covered all the time. Maybe 80% of the time.
He can get around with Spidey Sense, so he doesn't care much - he loves his fro and is always picking it out.
He Pavitr are like best friends. Pavi and The Brown Twins get LOUD AS HELL when all together.
Gwen thinks he's an absolute goofball - So Artie tries his best to make her laugh. She seems like she needs it.
When not on stage and in battle, he prefers to play an acoustic guitar, which Hobie doesn't like playing. His acoustic is also blue.
Him and Hobie can play on each other's guitars, but it sounds very trippy, and VERY VERY weird, abnormally so.
If their heads are covered, or hair done like each other's, they can seamlessly pass as each other.
Hobie SUCKS at an American accent - but somehow, he can mimic Artie's perfectly.
It's the same for Artie - sucks at British, but can speak like Hobie.
He loves chocolate candy bars, Hobie likes fruity candy.
They do write songs together and go to each others shows, though they don't ever really perform together.
They wrestle A LOT
Artie is a genius as well, and they work on mechanics together, Artie is great at math specifically.
He and Hobie do each others hair care and help oil each other's scalps.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So uh.....that's Artie :) The guy
If you made it this far THANK YOU THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ENTERTAINING ME - Artie platonically gives you a red rose.
ALSO TELL ME Why I tried to draw him like Jimi Hendrix But he looking like the Jackson 5 IM SO SORRY YALL
Here's OG Hobie as a thank you! Just imagine two Hobarts standing on either side of you both tall and with big hair and touchy and talkative as fuck Diane is living the DREAM let your OCs be happy
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
β Live Streamingβ Interactive Chatβ Private Showsβ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch β’ No registration required β’ HD streaming
β‘οΈπΈπ€πΎπ Spider-Punk, but make it cvnty and revealing ππ€πΎπΈβ‘οΈ
Who's better to dress up as than your favorite super-powered, guitar-playing, web-slinging prettyboy? No one, of course!
A.N: you thought I'd forget, but I did not!! I really wanted to add more detail to this and draw Hobie in Di's clothes, but I was SWAMPED with work this week. But that won't stop me! This was all so fun!!
HUGE thanks to @the-kr8tor for coming up with such a fun event!! Octobie was the best way to spend my birth month :)
Diane Pastors of Earth 1294A is Disco-Spider - a roller-skating, record-spinning, bass-playing, web-slinging, Disco Queen!
A freedom fighter by choice and a web-head by chance, Disco has Opal the Funk Machine in hand, and her fingers on the pulse of Spider Society HQ!
She's here to give you the down-low on campus - or (more likely) talk your ear off about Hobie Brown. She's kinda Not Normal about him.
Got a spidersona? I wanna see them! Just jump in my askbox, or tag me in a post!
Catch Disco on Campus and join the
The Spider Society Welcome Committee!
Love Hobie Brown? Have your sona ask about
The Hobie Brown Fanclub!
and get the backstage pass from Diane - one of Hobie's custom guitar picks! (yes ...... rlly)
__________________________________________________
a.n: I realized I never actually posted a Spidersona sheet for DiscoSpider - the Spidersona I made solely to ship with Hobie and my current rp obsession. Soooo here it is!! Just a lot of sketches and ideas from the last month. I really love this sona and the community she's let me connect with - all of your sonas are so cool!!
if you've read this far, have interacted with Disco, or have sent your sona in - thank you so much :) i appreciate it
