#dirtyblond

“And another thing. Did you know that Iceland let their banks fail and they’re doing just fine?” 

Iceland this and Iceland that. Iceland, Iceland, Iceland!  

“Have you heard  Jón Þór “Jónsi” Birgisson?” 

Huh?

“Jonsi from Sigur Rós?” 

Yeah, I’ve heard of Sigur Ros and Björk Guðmundsdóttir and Monsters and Men-although if I never hear that trumpet line from Little Talks again, I’ll, I’ll…..look up Jonsi.

”How about Júníus Meyvant Iceland’s whitest hottest soul singer?”

 No!!!! Dammit!

“Here have a piece of omNom’s Icelandic white chocolate. I’m usually a dark chocolate fan, but this is made with Icelandic milk powder.” 

I bet it is. How about the cacao beans, are they from Iceland? 

“I don’t know, the ingredients only say ‘organic cacao butter’-nothing about beans.” 

Thanks, I know. 

“You’ve had it before?” 

No, but white chocolate is made only from the cacao butter, not the beans. AND CACAO BEANS DON’T GROW IN ICELAND! 

“Alright, alright, don’t get so uptight. Try the chocolate, it’s called Dirty Blonde. What do you think? Isn’t the packaging amazing?”

I haven’t tried the packaging. 

“I mean the design-you’re so funny today. So…the chocolate, how’s it taste?”

I don’t know, let me have another few pieces. 

“Mmmm, I don’t know, it’s $14 a bar.” 

What!? $14 a bar! It should be called Dirty Money or Blonde Gold! 

“Here, let the next piece melt in your mouth and taste the ‘sweet cacao silkened with creamy butter and caramel.’” 

Mmmm, it is good. 

“Yeah, I know right? Kind of like licking Bjork’s skin only better.” 

You’re a sick, sick dude. 

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