#dimension hopping

Sean: (playing his guitar) 🎶Look for the bare necessities, the simple bare necessities. Forget about your worries and your strife. I mean the bare necessities, Old mother nature's recipes that bring the bare necessities of life wherever I wander, wherever I roam, I couldn't be fonder of my big home, the bees are buzzin in the trees to make some honey just for me, when you look under the rocks and plants and take a glance at the fancy ants and maybe try a few, the bare necessities of life will come to-

Campus security: Hey do you have a permit to preform here?

Sean: um, permit?

Campus security: Our campus has a strict no soliciting policy. So get to class.

Sean: Oh I'm not a student.

Campus security: (growing more irritated) let me get this straight-

Sean: Not something I'm used to-

Campus security: (glares) You're soliciting money, distrubing the peace and you're loitering on college grounds while impersonating a student?

Sean: Holy shit is that a streaker! (points behind him)

Security guard: (immediately turns) Where?!

Sean: (absolutely booking it in the other direction)

Security guard: (turns back to see Sean running) Get back here!!

Sean: (opens the door to the first building he sees running up the stairs)

Security guard: (follows him into the building and sees him up the stairs) Get back here!

Sean: (panics and immediately opens the first door and runs in closing it behind him, then looks and sees a bunch of people in seats in a giant lecture hall and walks down a few rows before taking a seat to blend in)

Professor: Alright, class I'm Dr. Choi, welcome to philosophy 101. Our first lesson is what is philosophy?

student: the study of existence?

Professor: Close. It is the study of general and fundamental questions about existence, knowledge, values, reason, logic and language. Philosophy in English comes from the greek Philos- love and Sophia -(wisdom) so in translation it means the love of wisdom. Now the fathers of eastern philosophy are Lao Tzu, Confucius and

-much later-

Jack: Dude you okay? You've been staring at the ceiling for like 20 minutes since you got back?

Sean: Have you ever thought about existence? Like how do we really know what is real? Like just because this bed feels real, does that make it real?

Jack: (excited) Did you get weed while you were out?

Sean: (sits up and puts his hand on this brother's shoulder) I found something better.

Jack: Shrooms? Lsd? Acid?

Sean: Philosophy.

Jack: what.

Sean: For example! (he lifts up the 10000 won note) This is just special paper printed with ink, it's inherently worthless but because it serves a social function it gains value.

Jack: Are you sure you didn't find drugs?

Sean: Like why do we call this a won? And if we never heard of it would we call it something else and still be able to understand what it means?

Jack:(calls out) Emmett, Mimi, I think college broke Sean's brain!

Mimi: (from the bathroom) You can't break what isn't there.

Emmett: (opening the door holding the ice bucket) What happened now?

Jack: (pointing at his little brother) Sean says he's sober but is questioning existence and asking if shit is real or not.

Emmett: Oh god, he discovered philosophy.

Jack: What do we do?

Emmett: Give me your emergency weed.

Jack: pffffffffffffft I don't have emergency weed-

Emmett: (grabs his brother's custom shoes, finds a spot on the side of the heel, pops open a compartment and pulls out a small faux velvet bag that has a small metal waterproof capsule that has a marijuana leaf etched into it)

Jack: What? How did that get in there?

Emmett:

Jack:

Emmett: bruh

Jack: (rolls his eyes) How did you know?!

Emmett: Mimi.

Jack: (sighs) So what does it make him normal?

Emmett: (grabbed some rolling papers from Mimi's bag) That or it will make us high enough not to care.

Jack: Oh if that's the case grab my other shoe, that one has LSD.

Emmett: That'll work.

Mimi: (opening the bathroom door but still on the toilet) I have shrooms in one of my shoes, that might be a bit gentler.

Emmett: (pocketing the weed capsule) Which shoe?

Mimi: Right. Left one has ecstasy.

Sean: Hey! Is it really that bad that I'm asking you deep questions about the nature of reality?

Emmett: Seany-boy, We're quarterish demons who were conceived via a magic dildo conjured from a magical barrier between realms and we are currently stuck in an alternate dimension and timeline where our parents are normal humans in college. If we question the logic of our own existence the duct tape and bubble gum holding it together will explode.

Sean: What kind of bubble gum?

Emmett: And with that I'm going out to smoke everything in this. (holds up metal capsule)

Jack: Hey that's mine!

Emmett: (holding up above his head as he opens the door to the hallway) Not any more shorty.

Jack: At least fucking share!

Sean: Wait.. Can I have some?

Emmett: You can if you catch me

Sean: Coming!(runs out the door)

Mimi: (pushes Sean off her cause he was cuddled up to his big sister in his sleep and sits up)

Sean: (tiny sad moo)

Mimi: (rolls her eyes and then gets out of the bed, she teleports downstairs to the continental breakfast, grabs coffee for all of them drops them off, teleports again, now holding a bunch of food and drinks, then grins evilly before yanking open the curtains) Rise and Shine Boys!!

Boys: (moos of hungover betrayal)

Mimi: Yeah yeah, shut up. Now drink something non alcoholic and put on clothes. (Mimi grabs a shirt sniffs it and gags) Ugh I think you got some back splash on this- wait- Who's shirt this?

Sean: (squinting, grabs his glasses) I- don't know? But I think Jack was wearing it.

Mimi: Of course he was, Wait. Sean those aren't the boxers you were wearing?

Sean: How do you know what boxers I was wearing?

Mimi: Because they were the SpongeBob ones and I threw at you that morning because I washed them for you.

Sean: (glaring) Will you stop stealing my boxers for sleep shorts?

Emmett: Please.

Jack: It's irritating.

Mimi: 1. I washed and returned them and 2. what is the point of having brothers if I can't steal your clothes? I mean I basically have an unlimited supply of sleep shorts, T-shirts and hoodies.

Boys: (staring annoyed and hungover)

Mimi: Hey I stole you Gatorade from the sundry shop! Also I'm not the one wearing some stranger's underwear! And those aren't your shorts Em! (realization then immediate glaring) Who did you do?

Jack: sooo like I may have sucksd off the chapter president, the vice president and the treasurer and then it kinda turned into a free for all.

Emmett: Wait, the president? The brunette twunk with the stupid tribal tattoo?

Sean: Did he have frosted tips?

Jack: (cringes) Yeah, not my proudest bang.

Emmett: Wait? Did you fuck him or just suck him?

Jack: Both.

Sean: Same.

Emmett: I hate how similar our tastes are- Wait Sean topped him?? Shit, talk about a bottom.

Mimi: wait what did he look like?

Jack: Oh (shows photo of him)

Mimi: (looks at the pic) Oh yeah I'd peg him- ugh We need to not have the same tastes- Wait- (zooms in and sees someone who looks like Jinu in the background) Who is that?

Emmett: (takes pic) Oh that guy? Yeah I don't know, he was being passed around between four of the other pledges like a blunt.

Jack: Oh shit- Yeah dude he was getting spit roasted by that Abby guy and his buddy Roman?

Sean: I saw him getting fucked by some purple haired twunk and some guy named BB? Baby? or were they calling the guy that?

Mimi: Umm did you know what his name was?

Emmett: Jay?

Sean: Gin?

Mimi: Jinu?

Boys: Yeah that was it!

Mimi: oh fuck- Wait you three didn't do anything with him?

Boys: (all shake their head no)

Jack: Those four weren't fucking sharing him.

Sean&Emmett: (nods)

Mimi: (groans) well good cause in this dimension he's technically our uncle-

Boys: (all start gagging)

Mimi: (teleports and is now standing outside fraternity row waiting for her brothers)

Roman (Romance): Hey~

Mimi: (turns and immediately snorts) Not a chance in hell.

Roman: Fair. Rude. But fair.(walks away)

Mimi: ugh where are those three?

Emmett: (very loud for him) MImi!!

Jack: We fouhd yooooou

Sean: *hic* Hi.

Mimi: (groans) Are you three all drunk?! Emmett! You were supposed to keep them out of trouble!

Emmett: Hey! *hic* I did! They're not dead or arestited! So, they're ooookay!

Sean: *hic* We're Fiiiiiine!

Jack: Hell yeah!

Emmett: Helll yeah!!!

Sean: Hellllll yeahhh!

Mimi: WILL YOU THREE SHUT UP!!

boys: (sniffle)

Mimi: seriously?

Emmett: s'not nice to yell at people, Mimi.

Sean: Yeah! We didn't yell at you!

Jack: mean to me.

Mimi: (groans) I'm sorry I yelled at you. Now did you figure out where we're going to sleep tonight?

Jack: Yeah! (makes a very bad trumpet noise) Tada

Emmett and Sean: (stand on either side of the frat house they just walked out of)

Mimi: Can we please sleep in a place where touching the furniture doesn't come with something I'll need antibiotics for.

Sean: Well where are we gonna find a place to sleep for freee? Nana Celine's?

Mimi: Yeah she called the cops on me so no.

Jack: (tapping his head) think think think think, lightbulb! hotel room!

Emmett: But our cards don't worky cause they don't exist?

Jack: pffffffffffffft, we don't need money. We can go to that Holiday inn I worked at.

Mimi: You don't know anyone there. You haven't worked there since high school. How will that help?!

Jack: (pouts) if you're gonna be a meanie I'm not helping!

Mimi: (groans) fine. Sorry. What's your idea?

Jack: Soooo if they're as cheap as they were in our dimension, their cameras don't actually work work! One of the back doors dodn't *hic* lock, like at alllll. So we can just walk in that way!

Mimi: Okay so that's how we get in, how do we get a room?

Jack: That is where Jacky-boy does his thing~ (trying to look sauve) I'll seduce the person behind the counter and then one of you can make a master key and mark a room as out of order. Then we switch rooms every few days. Eaaaasssy peesy lemon *hic* squeezey.

Mimi: How are you smarter drunk than sober?

Jack: Cause I'm injellitent.

Mimi: (groans) I can't believe I'm saying this but I don't have a better idea so lets go.

Boys: Woooo!!!!

Mimi: shhhhhh!

boys: (quiet)wooooo.

Mimi: please let this work.

-later at the hotel-

front desk guy: (sitting at the desk, looking at his phone)

Mimi: (outside the front of the hotel, just out of view) Alright, you distract him while I teleport behind the desk. You think you can do this?

Jack: (drunk smug smile) N- *hic* never met a man who didn't question their sexuality because of my pretty face and my fat ass. (spanks his own ass) ow.

Mimi: (pinching the bridge of her nose) just go inside before I change my mind.

Jack: Yoooooou got it! (stumbles inside and walks over to the desk) wooo, your flooor is wobbly. You should get someone to look at that.

front desk guy: (immediately done) can I help you, sir?

Jack: Yeahhh you can *hic* hot stufff.

Front desk guy: sir. I'm at work.

Jack: You can take a break for some cake~

Front desk guy: Sir, do you have or plan to book a reservation with us or not.

Jack: yeahhhh, where do you wanna go handsome?

Front desk guy: home.

Jack: Oh damn, I love someone who can host. Soo you a top? Bottom? Side? tell- *hic* me what you need~

Front desk guy: sir, if you don't have a reservation or plan on booking a room, I'm going to have to ask you to leave

Jack: (looks absolutely confused) what?

Front desk guy: Do you or do you not have a reservation?

Jack: (big hiccup) ugggh

Front desk guy: sir.

Jack: (gags)

Front desk guy: No. No. No!

Jack: (immediately bolts away from the desk and barfs all over the floor)

Front desk guy: (eye twitching) get out.

Jack: I'm sorry, I'm just- (gags again before puking more this time closer to the exit door)

Front desk guy: FUCKING LEAVE!

Jack: I'm going I'm going! (teleports as soon as the guy turns away)

-outside the back door of the hotel-

Jack: *hic* ooo teleporting not great on the tum tum.

Mimi: It did however work for the plan (holding master key) I marked room 324 as out of order.

Sean: Would now be a bad time to tell you I puked in that bush?

Emmett: I pissed on it when he was done.

Mimi: Just get inside and keep your bodily fluids inside til we get to a bathroom!

(in Zoemira's dorm)

Zoey: So..... that Mimi girl is insane right?

Mira: (snorts) definitely..... she kept saying you and Rumi were both in love with me

Zoey:

Mira:

Zoey:

Mira: Are you in love with me?

Zoey: Yes.

Mira: And Rumi?

Zoey: I have no idea if she's in love with either of us.

Mira: No, I meant- Are you in love with her too?

Zoey: ...... yes

Mira: (immediately kisses Zoey while tearing up) I love you, I love you both so much.

Zoey: (sniffles) I love you too, We need to tell Rumi!

-meanwhile-

Rumi: So what are you exactly?

Mimi: Quarter demon- well quarterish.

Rumi: are you the only one?

Mimi: (still digging through the cabinets before resigning herself to stale cheerios) hmm? No. My brothers are here. They thought about helping me but Jack and Sean never went to college and wanted to see what it was about and Emmett when with them to prevent them from getting arrested or at least caught.

Rumi: W H A T

Mimi: (eating the cheerios) Will you relax? They're probably at some all you can eat place because I'm sure they fucking starving. Ugh why am I so hungry in this dimension?! (shakes her head) Anyways, they're harmless. Hell they're probably taking nap somewhere

-cut to fraternity row-

(Shots by LMFAO blaring at a frat house)

Emmett: (dominating beer pong)

Sean: (doing a keg stand)

Jack: (totally not blowing the other frat guys in one of the bedrooms)

-back to Mimi-

Mimi: (mouth full) anyways you gonna come out of the closet or what?

Rumi: I'm straight!

Mimi: Sure and I'm a purple leprechaun. See now we're both lying.

Rumi: W-well, even if I wasn't straight. I'm still with Jinu!

Mimi: (groans) ugh why are you obsessed with that bisexual twink? Also he was clearly checking out his friend while he was working out.

Rumi: He was not! He was just spotting for Abby!

Mimi: He cancelled your date, to 'spot' his friend at the gym. Girl. Do you hear yourself?

Rumi: He loves me!

Mimi: I mean does he though? I mean I think he cares about you, but like he seems like he's his own bundle of closeted issues. He can't fix you, You can't fix him. So please stop trying.

Rumi: (genuinely pissed off) STOP ACTING LIKE YOU KNOW ME!

Mimi: (rolls her eyes then looks up at the ceiling) this is a karmic punishment for when I was a teenager isn't it?

Rumi: LEAVE

Mimi: Fine. Fine. I'm going, but I'm taking the cheerios. (teleports)

Rumi: (wiping her eyes, angry crying)

-Celine's house-

Celine: (in her robe with a cup of tea, clearly going through it, then hears a knock on her window) what? (pulls back the curtains) AHHHH!

Mimi: (holding up a sign with Celine x Therapy drawn in a big heart and mouthing it's you!)

Celine:

Mimi: 😀

Celine: 😡

Mimi: 🤨

Celine: (presses her phone to the window)

Mimi: (looks at the phone and sees it's to the police) 😨😱

Celine: 🖕🏼

It doesn’t have to be Snyderverse Batman, but I do love him for this concept. But any Bruce that has somehow lost Dick finds out there’s a universe with like an All Star Batman kinda situation, where an alternate Bruce kidnapped Dick and makes him hunt rats in the Batcave and whatnot. And he just sees red.

Because Dick was the light of his life. He didn’t know true happiness until he adopted Dick. His entire life crumbled the day Dick died.

He can’t fathom any version of himself hurting Dick, or being a poor guardian to him, or doing anything that would make Dick anything but happy. Why would he do that? What is wrong with this alternate version of him?

Maybe his Dick didn’t come into his life until he was already a teenager, and this alternate version is a child. Maybe the alternate Bruce kidnapped him when he was 8, maybe he even killed the Graysons so he could take him and turn him into a sidekick.

So the good Bruce sees this tiny little version of his son being mistreated, and he just scoops him up and brings him home.

Maybe Dick is terrified of him at first. Maybe he doesn’t realize right away that he’s in an alternate dimension with an alternate Bruce. Maybe he’d never even met Bruce, he’d only ever met Batman. He doesn’t know what going on. He doesn’t know why he’s suddenly in this big manor.

Maybe Bruce eventually brings him to meet the Justice League, but Dick’s version of Batman was at odds with his version of the JL. He did nothing but speak poorly about them, make Dick afraid of them. So when good Bruce brings him to meet them, Dick is so worried that they’re going to hurt Bruce. It takes a lot of convincing to get Dick to understand that they’re all friends.

In this alternate universe, Dick fell with the rest of the Flying Graysons. Bruce never had the chance to adopt him, it never even crossed his mind, because it was never even a possibility.

Having a child is something he never knew he was missing. He’s still friendly with Superman and Wonder Woman and he’s in the Justice League, but he’s more closed off. He doesn’t open up as much as he would have if he had a brightly colored little Robin at his side.

So when this terrified and frantic child appears in his cave one night after patrol, he doesn’t really know what to do.

“I have to go back!” Dick shouts at him, and he’s breathing heavily, he’s panicking. “I have to go back, I have to help him!”

“Alright, alright,” Bruce tries to calm him down. “Where did you come from?”

Bruce keeps trying to grab hold of him to keep him still and calm him down, but Dick keeps squirming away.

“I need to go home!” he cries. “Stop! Stop, I need to go home! You’re not my Bruce!”

Bruce freezes, because he’s still in his batsuit. He still has the cowl on. There’s no way this child should know who he is.

It takes a while, but he eventually figures out what’s going on. Once Dick calms down. Once Dick explains that his Bruce sent him away. That his Bruce came back from a mission with the JL, and he was hurt, he was hurt so so badly, and the world around them was crumbling. He wouldn’t let Dick help him. He grabbed a bag and gave it to Dick and sent him away.

This Bruce has no idea what to do. He has a distraught, panicking child in his cave. He can’t send him back to the world he just came from. What is he supposed to do with him?

He brings Dick upstairs to the manor and gives him a room. Well, Dick picks the room. He says it’s his. Bruce doesn’t argue.

Later that night, as he broods in the cave, he receives a transmission from the Bruce who sent Dick here. It’s a video explaining why he picked this universe, why he picked this Bruce. He pleads for him to take care of Dick. To keep him safe. He explains what’s going on in his universe, how it’s not going to survive much longer.

“You’ll love him, I promise you will,” this other Bruce tells him. “He’s the best kid from any universe. He deserves the best. He deserves to live. I know you’ll do right by him.”

And, well, shit. Now he’s gonna have to keep the kid. He just needs to figure out how to go about it from a legal standpoint. He can’t just say the kid appeared in his basement.

Maybe he’ll say Dick is the product of some fling from a decade ago. That’s plausible. That could work.

So when they start looking around the cave (he never had an eight year old Dick Grayson around to convince him to call it a Batcave) and the manor and start talking major shit and knocking things over and saying it’s not as good as theirs, he gets so annoyed.

“Will you get out of my house!” he shouts at them.

And they all turn to him and just:

It allows others to travel through other dimensions safely. Not only for their safety but the entirety of Anomalous too.

Traveling through The Middle without your DHL (Dimension Hopping " License " as they now call it for the modern folk) isnt dangerous as the places you go loop back (its the deeper levels that are incredibly delicate), you must find the loop breaker, which is passing the first Lord, then you will gain access to the DHL handler. (Atticus)

The only things you need, is your place of origin and your vow. Break the vow and you lose the DH privileges.