hey, sorry to bother... but I was wondering if you could help me a little bit...(??
Lately I've been having a lot of problems with my labels. I started identifying myself as bisexual (this was like 5 yrs ago) and then I also start doubting about my gender and start identifying as demigirl too...
But this past month I haven't feel really comfortable with my labels, I tried to look for new ones and I've been constantly changing, and every time i try to use any of them it just doesn't feel good at all.
Rn I'm so done with labels (idk if at this point I hate them). So I want to know if it's okay if I just "explain" my gender and sexuality by saying I'm queer.
I'm tired of giving explanations, I'm just a human being that loves all human beings.
Thanks for sending this in, you are no bother at all. Before I answer your question directly, I want to make a blanket apology to anyone following—a lot has been going in my life, and I haven't been able to be online very much, but I am still more than happy to answer any asks sent in. Hopefully I can be interacting and reblogging with more queer content soon 😁
Now to address your question. Your struggle with labels hits very close to home right because it mirrors my own. I have felt at home for a long time with the pan label (among a few others), but the more I discover about my gender and sexuality, the more those labels feel like they fit like a too-small sweater.
The wonderful thing about queerness is that it's not just a community or an umbrella term or a political ideology, it can also be your label. You can just be queer, in regards to your gender, your sexuality, the way you approach relationships, etc.
Sometimes, specific labels are helpful and validating. Sometimes though, they are the opposite of that. It is 100% okay to just say you are queer. You never have to divulge the intricacies of the way you experience gender or attraction if you don't want to. If other labels feel wrong, then don't use them.
You are not alone in this at all. And from one queer to another, I hope you find the label(s) that feels like home.
- Riv (they/them)












