#dickori

Don't ever touch your Batling in view of the Big Bat. Holding hands is OK but only when necessary. Kissing is forbidden. Arm around the shoulders? Waist? The Bat will glare until you back off. It's important to retreat as soon as possible. "He carved a hand out of Kryptonite and smacked me with it" an anonymous source added.

Don't ever taste or steal something from the plate of your Bat even when invited because the Bat won't take kindly to you "taking food out of his child's mouth," as another anonymous source says.

Don't ever bring your Bat back late. The Bat can have his kids up all hours punching clowns and headbutting back robbers but his kids come in from a date ten minutes after curfew? Expect to find Batman rapping on your window, pointing to "what looks like a clock they teach little kids to tell the time" stated a redacted source.

Don't ever honk when you're outside to pick up your Bat. It doesn't matter if they told you to do so to avoid their siblings and the stiff small talk with the Bat. "Walk to the door, knock and wait for the Bat to drift by," one author of the list insists, "If he ignores you, that's good. If he nods, you can come in. If he just hovers and speaks only to his kid, you're in danger."

Dick got a letter from Jason

Jason is a good artist, did you know that?

He's not bored.

Archie comic/reference under break!