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that deep-seated fear of not being "in character" enough. and the self-doubt. ah yes, if i say or do something "ooc", everyone who knows anything about my source will execute me at dawn. sure.
identity issues with imposter syndrome on top of identity issues with imposter syndrome pretending to be a dick grayson. yuuuup. nothing to see here doc! a perfectly stable specimen!
- dick grayson/nightwing, #🪶featherwing #fictive
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rule of fictive number one: be yourself and have fun. rule of fictive number two: change body's haircut to fit your source appearance asap without giving it a second thought. rule of fictive number three: eat hot chip and lie.
anyway i'm dying our hair black. wish i was able to cut our hair properly as well but i have one (1) mirror and like 15% experience cutting my own hair so i'm not risking giving myself a bowl cut again. sighs sadly. i do miss the wavy hair i had in source. right now they're still in a similar haircut, but longer, and are as straight as a ruler. i've been debating getting a hair curler so i could give myself some waves/volume, but the debate has been going on for over a year already with no visible results XD
- nightwing/dick grayson, #🪶featherwing #fictive
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when you're in a "feels ashamed about one's source relationships" competition and your opponent is me 💪😎✨
- dick grayson/nightwing, #🪶featherwing #fictive
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i can't not take to heart any negative comments about my source character. objectively, i understand that they're not talking about me me, but it still stings. i also unfortunately have an-unrelated-but-still-annoying "everything-is-about-me" disorder, so that's double whammy,
- nightwing/dick grayson, #🪶featherwing #fictive
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out of nowhere it's slade missing hours. damn. okay. miss my man or whatever he was to me #MyToxicSituationship
- dick grayson/nightwing, #🪶featherwing #fictive
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pros: i got to keep a good 70% of my flexibility from past life!
cons: my Everything Hurts and also the hypermobility is Not a good type of flexibility to Have. Ow #MyOw
- dick grayson/nightwing, #🪶featherwing #fictive
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been thinking about logistics of me ending up in this system. i know a bunch of folks here are perfectly fine with thinking of themselves as fragments of the original person & perceptions of the character rather than the character. and i know a bunch believe they just jumped universes and ended up in this body and were ultimately alive when the jump happened.
and then there's me. i know for a fact i died before being reincarnated here. i don't know when or where or what was the situation, but i know it was vigilante-related. can't remember anything more than that though, i start getting brain fog if i try. the curse of a dissociative disorder i guess </3
but! well! i should probably be grateful for the second chance? even if this life kind of sucks and i don't have my family here (i cant even call them or message them or hear their voices again or—) and yeah. yeah okay. i'm still alive though! and even if i can't have my family the same way i would have them in my past life, i can have them. they still exist. not all is lost!
- dick grayson/nightwing, #🪶featherwing #fictive
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encountered a member of my family in the wild today ("the wild" does not include syscords/fictfolk-servers where i know there's at least one member of my family exists). i was very normal about it also. totally didnt freak out and go quiet and overthink everything!
("oh my god thats my family!!! yay!!! my family spotted!!!!" tail wagging reaction VS "oh my god thats my family fuck fuck fuckfuckfucjfucj what do i do" panicked thoughts.)(overwhelming.!)
i'm usually better at this, honestly. the intensity of today's reaction is. embarrassing. –_–" eugh
- dick grayson/nightwing, dc, #fictive #🪶 featherwing
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