i'm feeling so many things about supriya leaving the pitt. i'm confused because i don't feel like this is where her storyline this season was intended to go, and i don't think it's in line with the character we saw last season & how much she grew.
i'm upset for supriya, who is so talented and deserved better material if this was going to be her final season and not just part of an ongoing arc.
i'm so sad we'll never get to see how her story concludes. we'll never get to see her having the kind of conversation every single other character has gotten this season, where she's told that she's valued & given the support she needs. we'll never get meaningful resolution between her & robby. we'll never get to see the continuation of her dynamic with abbot which, platonic or romantic, has been such a big part of both of those characters from the beginning.
i'm really angry and i don't know where to direct that anger. and i'm just selfishly so disappointed that two of my favorite characters were the first to leave this show.
i've been thinking about that interview noah wyle did a while back, when he said something like, "people relate to these characters basically one-to-one, so the most important thing is that we keep honoring their stories."
i feel really, really let down by that right now. samira reminded me a lot of myself; someone who spent so long focusing on self-improvement, on success, on getting to the next thing, and then turned around one day & realized i'd neglected most of what mattered. someone who got pushed out of pursuing a career i'd wanted by teachers & mentors who didn't see me. someone who was capable of tremendous empathy but also had a temper, was impatient, was bad at friendships & relationships. someone who talked back and stood up for herself.
and as someone who has also spent a lot of time in emergency rooms, she's the kind of doctor i would have loved to have when i was sitting there alone & scared & feeling like my pain was an inconvenience.
she's not the only reason i watch the show. the show has been & still is bigger to me than any one actor or character. but samira meant so much to me, and i know she did to a lot of other people as well. i wish i was able to write about this more eloquently, but mostly right now i just feel like screaming.
