songs that i think represent spider socorro so go listen to them rn
"Oh, and you'll find somebody you can blame. And you'll follow the creek that runs out into the sea. And you'll find the peace of the Lord." OH MY GOD?? THE SULLYS? JAKE AND NEYTIRI SORT OF BLAMING SPIDER AFTER HE WAS CAPTURED BY QUARITCH, JAKE SAYING THAT 'SPIDER KNOWS EVERYTHING', HINTING AT THE FACT THAT THEY HAD TO MOVE FROM THE FOREST BECAUSE SPIDER WOULD EVENTUALLY GIVE THEM UP!!! 'follow the creek that runs out into the sea' chat. do NOT tell me that that line doesn't represent the Sully family leaving the forest, QUITE LITERALLY RUNNING OUT INTO THE SEA. 'and you'll find the peace of the Lord' THE SULLYS SHOWN BEING HAPPY WITH THE METKAYINA WHILE SPIDER WAS BEING TORTURED IM SOBBING.
"And the cancer spread, and it ran into her body and her blood. And there's nothing you can do about it now." Neteyam. Just Neteyam. Oh my god, there's nothing they could've done about it once he got shot im crying. This also relates to 3/4 of the fandom blaming Spider for Neteyam's death, and saying that it should've been Spider instead. I think the line 'theres nothing you can do about it now' just proves that it wasn't anyones fault, like once Lyle Wainfleet caught Neteyam in his line of sight, it was over. It wasn't anyones fault, and blaming Spider is just downright stupid! Anyway after this verse, a beautiful instrumental begins with just voices singing, no words, and I think that it perfectly encapsulates Spider's character, specifically the youthful joy he carries with him, and the upbringing he had with the Sully children.
"Older father, weary soul, you'll drive. Back to the home you made on the mountainside. With that ugly, terrible thing. Those papers for divorce and a lonely ring." Quaritch. Sigh. Just Recom Quaritch and his sad, recycled life. Spider having a father but he's old and weary and ugly and terrible, and who wants to kill his other father-figure, and who keeps trying to hold his friends hostage, and who saved him from being tortured, and who threatened to beat him, and who protected him from being stabbed, and who burns down Na'Vi villages, and who hurts the people, and who renounces Eywa, and who killed Neytiri's family, and who begged him to go with him. SIGHHH SPIDER SOCORRO YOU WILL ALWAYS BE LOVED BY ME.
500 Miles - Peter, Paul and Mary
"Lord, I'm one, Lord, I'm two. Lord, I'm three, Lord, I'm four. Lord, I'm 500 miles from my home. 500 miles, 500 miles, 500 miles, 500 miles." CRIES. SPIDER YOU WILL ALWAS BE LOVED BY ME. This song literally represents Spider's time as a captive with the recombinant squad. One, two, three, four. One, Kiri. Two, Lo'ak. Three, Neteyam. Four, Tuk. Spider counting the people he loves the most, the people he fights for and the reason he keeps going. '500 miles from my home' SPIDER HAVING TO LEAD THE RECOMS THROUGH THE FOREST, HIS HOME, WHERE HE GREW UP, BUT HE CAN'T RUN FREE LIKE HE USED TO. One, two, three, four. Four people who aren't in the forest anymore but Spider is, and he's so alone </3 this doesn't even make sense im just upset and typing bullshit atp.
"Not a shirt on my back, not a penny to my name. Lord, I can't go home, this away." Spider reflecting on how much he's lost over the course of his time with Quaritch, he literally has nothing. Not a shirt on his back, not a penny to his name. And when he finds Lo'ak and Neteyam on the ship, he's finally so close to home but they have to fight their way out and Neteyam gets shot and he dies and suddenly it's one, two, three, four, five hundred miles away from home again because an aspect of the home in his heart is dead and gone. And Neytiri holds him hostage and threatens to kill him and he'll never find his way home again.
"Been traveling these wide roads for so long, My heart's been far from you. Ten-thousand miles gone. Oh, I wanna come near and give ya. Every part of me." Spider traveling with Quaritch and the recoms, reflecting on the Sullys and Kiri. Ten thousand miles gone, so far away from his family in spirit but not in body. He's so close, he can feel it. They're in the same ocean, feeling the same breeze. He wants to come near them and give every part of himself like he used to,
"But there is blood on my hands, and my lips aren't clean" BUT THERE IS BLOOD ON HIS HANDS, NA'VI BLOOD AND TULKUN BLOOD THAT HE WASN'T RESPONSIBLE FOR SPILLING BUT HE FEELS IT ALL THE SAME. THE NA'VI PEOPLE THAT QUARITCH HAS INJURED, THE ILU HE'S SHOT, THE TULKUN THE SKY PEOPLE HAVE HARVESTED. He feels ashamed for what the sky people have done, what he's witnessed and yet been unable to stop. His lips aren't clean either, he's translated for his father and his squad, aided in their interrogations. Even if none of the Na'Vi blame him for it, he'll still blame himself.
I'm just imagining Spider seeing Kiri again, perhaps in a universe where Neteyam didn't die and Spider's guilt and self-hatred was amplified tenfold. The Sully family, whole and complete, shelter together on the same rock that Neteyam had died on in a different lifetime. The air is still, the calm before the storm of grieving and burying the dead. Spider bursts from the water, scrabbling up and onto the rock. He's deathly pale, his eyes wide and bloodshot. He's seen death before, but not like this. The Sully family rushes to grab ahold of him, but Spider flinches back. Blue hands, blue like Quaritch's who he'd seen drown. Blue like Wainfleet's, who he'd lost sight of half-way through the assault on the ship. Blue like Mansk, like Z-Dog, like Fike and Prager and Lopez and the Tsahik of the Ta'Unui clan, blue like the water around the dying Tulkun before it ran red with blood. Guilt, heavy and sweltering, presses down on Spider's stomach. He heaves and shouts, and falls still. Kiri presses close while the rest of the family retreats, their eyes wide and their mouths hanging agape in shock. Spider was strong, always strong and happy and so, so loud. Now he is quiet in all the wrong ways. Kiri presses close, her hands lifting to press palms against his mask, above where his cheeks are. Spider looks up, up, up into her golden eyes and sees Amrita flowing from the Tulkun's head, so much death for such a small prize. He sees Quaritch's eyes, hears his voice and feels his heart punch at the inside of his ribcage. Kiri whispers sweet nothings into his ears until he doubles over-- the saltwater that had managed to push through the seal of his mask puddles at his chin as tears replace it.
"In my darkness I remember, Momma's words reoccur to me. Surrender to the good Lord, and he'll wipe your slate clean."
Spider's darkness swallows him, drowns him, yet he prays to Eywa, and then to Kiri, and then to Neytiri and Jake and the Tulkun mother and calf, and then to Neteyam and Lo'ak and Tuk, and Norm and Max, and the Tsahik and Olo'eyktan of the village they'd burnt down. And then to Quaritch and the recoms. He prays for forgiveness, bent over with his knees cutting into the rock, with Kiri's warmth burning away the chill settled deep into his bones.
"Take me to your river. I wanna go. Oh, go on. Take me to your river. I wanna know." idk just Spider begging and praying to be taken away. Or praying for his guilt to fade, to wash away by the river's current. I love Spider and Kiri's bond, whether you see it as platonic or romantic, I don't mind either way I just love it so much. Spider's guilt and Kiri's ability to see the good in anything, Kiri is Spider's river, able to cleanse him of his self-imposed sin.
idek chat this is too sad now and im tearing up. listen to the songs please <3 half of this doesn't even make sense but yk when does my writing ever make sense
