The Greatest Show on Earth: Decision-Making Processes 3
This occurs around the age of 45. At this juncture, you may have been working for 20 years.
If you have children, they could be in high school or just starting college. It might be that youâre committed to pay for their education. It might be the first time you have the house to yourself, or the first time in a long time you have your partner to yourself. You may have a certain amount of freedom and a moment in which to reflect. At this moment in your life, you may have the chance to change directions, downsize, relocate, expand your social circle, go back to school, or rededicate your efforts to your work. If your career has been a priority, the coming period between ages 45 and 65 could be your most productive and rewarding, both personally and financially. You may have climbed the corporate ladder or be in private practice.
You may have secured your credentials. You may have mastered the fundamentals of your profession and even its finer points. Your network of colleagues could be welldeveloped. Your position in your industry and your community might be established. You could have credibility, perhaps influence, perhaps affluence.
During this time, you can mentor. You can teach. You can write. You can impart your wisdom, bootstrap other womenâs and menâs careers, give to charity, or start a charity. This is a moment you may have the freedom, resources, experience, and vision to soar in any direction you choose.
Where do you want to be? What position do you want to be in career-wise? Financially? Personally? Is this the time youâd like to jump ship and start a second career? Go into business for yourself? Take that âgapâ year off and live in a foreign country? Volunteer in your community?
All these things may seem very far away and almost impossible to attain if, right now, youâre a college senior with a mountain of student debt and shaky job prospects or a 30-something mom with a desire to do more. But I will tell you this: time flies. I will also tell you quite honestly that you can do almost anything you want to do. What is required most often is that you:
get the idea in your head;
figure out what needs to be done;
develop necessary skills;
work toward your goal consistently;
learn from your mistakes, and;
Again, set a tangible goal. Know whatâs required to achieve it. Get your ducks in a row. Do the work. Improve. Persevere. Achieve one goal. Then the next. Youâll astonish yourself.
This occurs around the age of 65. You may have been working for 40 years, longer than some people you work with have been alive. Youâll think of them and may refer to them as âkidsâ. Theyâll refer to you as âmaâamâ, and this may be irritating.
You may have the inclination to retire from the workforce. Your boss, if you have one, may invite you to lunch and subtly or not so subtly mention that youâve had a great career and that youâve made a great contribution to the company. Regardless of how successful youâve been, how much money youâve made, it might sting a little bit when someone directs you to the exit.
Another scenario is that you may voluntarily scale back your hours, work part-time, or quit completely. âRetirementâ, I will tell you from the many friends Iâve known whoâve done it, is great. For about three months. Then boredom sets in. Even those with all the money and resources in the world choose to work even as they age. Music icon Rod Stewart, who has sold over 100 million records worldwide since he started singing in 1961, mentioned not too long ago that he gets âanxiousâ after sitting around the (obviously very comfortable) house for a couple of weeks. As a person who can buy or do anything, or go anywhere and meet anyone, he just wants to go back to work, all these years later. That should tell you something.
Remember: time flies. I would suggest that you have some sort of vague idea right now about what you might like to do from the age of 65 to the age of 85. I would also suggest that you start right now: work hard at something you care about, live wisely and below your means (read âThe Old Money Bookâ for guidance on this). Save your money, invest astutely, and be in a position to do more than survive. Youâll also want to exercise, eat right, and be happy now so youâre healthy in your golden years.
Now, letâs take a moment and take a deep breath. You canât know all this stuff right now, or ever. You canât plan all this stuff. You can have a plan, though, and start to work on it. You can be aware of the span of your life and appreciate that it is finite. You should always try to maintain Your Perspective on Your Life as you meet people, set goals, accept or reject limits concerning what you think you can or cannot do, what you will or wonât do, what you can or canât be.
If youâre 18 years old and you think youâve met the Love of Your Life and youâre ready to get married, start a family, and be a mom and wife for the rest of your life, take a moment. Look at this piece of paper weâve just drawn out together. Is that really the best choice you can make right now?
18 to 85. Thatâs a long time, but it goes by quite quickly. You can learn, grow, and change tremendouslyâŚin just a year or two. Give yourself the benefit of the doubt. If youâre 30 years old and single, or just married, gaze toward the horizon and imagine where youâd like to be in 15 years. With children? Without children? Different city? Different country? If youâre 45, or 65, or at any point along the way, you have the chance to examine where you are, reflect upon the choices youâve made, consider the goals and dreams you have and have had, and assess the resources you have at your disposal to make them a reality. If you have made a choice youâre not happy with, give yourself the opportunity to make new choices. As you implement these choices into your daily life, you get to experience the rewards or consequences they bring.
Note: if you feel like you donât have options, then you arenât sufficiently aware of your situation, or you are not willing to change your habits, or both. So take a moment and get some perspective.
Brief fairytale: once upon a time, a young princess was lost in the woods. She came upon a frog who wore a small gold crown on his tiny green head. âIâm sorry to bother you,â said the princess, âbut I was walking in the woods, and now Iâm lost. Can you help me get back to my castle?â âCertainly, your highness,â said the frog. âDo you know where your castle is?â âYes,â replied the princess. âItâs near the river, on the highest mountain in the land.â âDo you know where you are now?â asked the frog. âNo, I donât,â replied the princess. To which the frog replied, âThen you canât get there from here.â
The moral of the silly story is this: in order to get to where you want to go, you have to know where you are. Otherwise, no one, not even a prince of a frog, can give you directions. The â18 to 85â chart and our review of lifeâs common tentpoles will help you determine where you are so you can decide how to get to where you want to be. (Weâll go into more detail on âdirectionâ in a later chapter.)
Another concept to keep in mind and apply to many of the issues weâll discuss in this book is B.A.S.I.S. In this case, the acronym refers to the following:
Budgetâbudget or limit your focus to where you think you are right now in life. Think in the short, narrow term to get started. Then broaden your field of view later.
Acquireâacquire the necessary perspective to determine what the next big tentpole is for you and how you can make the best choice.
Saveâsave your energy and apply it to competently and thoroughly executing the choice you make for your next big tentpole.
Investâinvest in resources that can help you make the most of your choice.
Spendâspend time in quiet reflection in order to acquire and maintain perspective on your life and to firmly establish the tentpoles that give your life shape.
Remember: âDo or do not, there is no try.â Make a plan, donât try to, do it.