#deathcare

It may seem like an unlikely combination: Pizza Hut, 24 Hour Fitness and a funeral casket and urn maker. Subscribe to read this story ad-free Get unlimited access to ad-free articles and exclusive content. And yet those are the companies with which the pizza chain stalwart now finds itself under the same roof. On Tuesday, Pizza Hut’s corporate parent Yum Brands, which also owns Taco Bell and…

“There are two major trends in how people are dressed. First, older people are far more likely to be wearing formal outfits like suits or dresses than those who die before they’re about 40. Young people are generally buried wearing casual clothing. Second, shoes and other foot coverings are far more likely to be brought if the deceased is male. Most women are buried barefoot regardless of outfit, but very few men are. So a blouse, jeans, and bare feet would be realistic for a woman in her twenties and a suit with polished shoes for a man in his seventies.”

Does this seem accurate? I’ve never really given this much thought. I’m a girl, and I suppose I’d rather be barefoot if my family insisted on burying me in a ridiculous plush casket.

Hey there! Sorry about the delay, it’s been a busy time for me 🥺

As far as I have ever experienced it is not common for anyone regardless of their gender to be buried without shoes. Burials and funerals are regional, meaning they have local customs and change from funeral home to funeral home, town to town, cemetery to cemetery and state to state.

Burials in my experience, if you’re an ethical director, should include fully dressing the decedent in plastic protective garments, then undergarments & socks. Your families chosen outfit for you would them by cut up the back and laid over top/tucked around you to give it the appearance of being worn. (This cut is because it is outstandingly difficult to dress an embalmed body, which is most common in the case of burials)

Large pads of cotton are then stuffed into the bra (as needed; to give the allusion of breasts the way they look while standing since they sag into the arm pits when laying back flat) as well as in the arms, tummy, and legs (as needed) to help fill out any weight loss, or shrinkage. With shoes being placed on last, often being tied together in situations of broken hips (your feet will look like a Penguin stands if your hip breaks at some point in life) to keep the hips looking natural. The split top casket drape only covers upper/mid thigh, down.

I have only ever buried children without shoes, but only because they were not brought to me. And children are most often buried and cremated in a “full couch” style casket (it’s completely open). So their feet were visible.

As far as cremations, you’d likely see less shoes there (regardless of gender) as most people put less thought into the outfit they cremate their loved ones in.

Also, hospital deaths do not have shoes or clothes on them at all. Just an open back Johnny (if you had a room), absorbent pads covering sensitive bits (if you died in ER/OR), or sometimes naked (inside a bag). Religious accommodations most always respected.

Some caskets are VERY comfortable, usually pillow top satin or velvet. Good stuff. I have laid in many.

This section is dedicated to the "Death-Care Professionals" of the community—those already licensed, those currently in the "prep room," and the students working toward the threshold.

🏛️ The Path to Licensure

Becoming a funeral professional is a marathon, not a sprint. We’ve archived the essential steps to help you navigate the journey:

The Academic Phase: Choosing the right mortuary science program (ABFSE accreditation guide).

The Board Exams (NBE): Resources for studying for the Arts and Sciences exams without losing your mind.

The Apprenticeship: How to find a mentor, what to ask during your first interview at a firm, and the "unspoken rules" of the first six months.

Licensure by State: A growing directory of state-specific requirements (US/International).

🛠️ Industry Tools & Reviews

We test the gear so you don't have to waste your apprentice wages.

Restorative Art Kits: Deep dives into waxes, cosmetics, and feature-setting tools.

Software for the Modern Firm: Comparing case management systems (from cloud-based apps to traditional legacy software).

The "Funeral Director's Uniform": * The Shoe Guide: Our community-voted list of the best footwear for standing 12 hours on marble floors.

The Suit Guide: Durable, professional fabrics that hold up in the prep room and the chapel.

🧠 The Mental Toll & Longevity

This industry has a high burnout rate. We believe in "sustaining the server."

Compassion Fatigue: How to tell when you've reached your limit and how to recharge.

The "Off-Call" Life: Strategies for maintaining a personal life while tied to a pager.

Peer Support: Connect with other "Across the River" pros who understand the unique dark humor and heavy heart of this work.

Death avoidance is not an individual failing; it’s a cultural one. Facing death is not for the faint-hearted. It is far too challenging to expect that each citizen will do so on his or her own. Death acceptance is the responsibility of all death professionals—funeral directors, cemetery managers, hospital workers. It is the responsibility of those who have been tasked with creating physical and emotional environments where safe, open interaction with death and dead bodies is possible.

-Power of Attorney expires upon death, it is NOT the same as an estate executor (I will repeat this every single dang time I make one of these posts)

-If you have found family who you want to take over your death plans upon passing, because you know your birth family will not honour your wishes - GET THAT SHIT IN WRITING.

Seriously!! If you are age of majority (most places 18) and legally able to look until putting together a will, do so!! (And make sure to regularly update it as needed, and notify the people who should know that you have done so!!)

Let the people close to you know what you want done! (Ex: burial, cremation, body donation, if you actually want a funeral service etc.)

ALSO- LOOK INTO PUTTING TOGETHER AN ADVANCE DIRECTIVE.

Death waits for no one, and I get it is a scary topic to address for a lot of folks, but it's even scarier for your loved ones to lose you and have absolutely zero idea on how to move forward (or absolutely zero say in how your community says goodbye to you if you werent on good terms with your immediate next of kin whose now in charge of your arrangements.)

Okay cool? Cool.