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i make myself laugh

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You guys I found a brush for the clothesss
They donât make men like this anymore
Oh, itâs evil, babe. The way you let your grace enrapture me.
Oh lord I need him now

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the idea that sam is just healthier at handling trauma/emotions is such bullshit. like that man also ignored, deflected and dismissed every single thing that ever happened to him. he is not healthier than dean in any way. i think collectively that needs to be accepted better
â¨Beekeeper - 12/13â¨
Summary: Four years after Dean disappeared, he comes back to find the life he left behind⌠waiting for him in the shape of a little girl with his eyes. Now itâs ghosts in the walls, love that never died and a second chance that might heal everythingâor break it for good.
-requested-
Pairing: Dean x Reader
Warnings: 18+ only! Smut, Language
Word Count: 8790
DISCLAIMER: Everything is purely fiction. I do not intend to attack or hurt anyone. The story is, of course, entirely made up and meant for entertainment purposes.
It was hot for June. You shifted your weight on the little stool, tugging at the hem of the stretchy dress youâd worn in, your belly impossible to disguise now at eight months.
Sally fanned herself with a catalog, perched in the plush chair by the mirrors. âOnly Dean Winchesterâ, she muttered with a grin, âdecides on a Wednesday heâs getting married by Saturday. God help usâ.
Lilah was twirling between the racks, her bee backpack bouncing, her curls springing loose from her braids. Every time you came out of the dressing room, she gasped like it was Christmas morning. âMommy, youâre a princess! Daddyâs gonna say âwow! so prettyââ.
You smiled, but it was a shaky thing. Because, yeah. This was Dean. Impulsive, stubborn, impossible. Heâd kissed you across the kitchen table last night and just said, âMarry me. Nowâ. Like it was the simplest thing in the world. And the thing was⌠youâd said yes.
Now here you were, trying to wedge yourself into gowns clearly not designed for women who could barely see their feet. One zipped halfway, another refused to go past your hips, and the third made you look like youâd been swallowed by a cloud.
Sally caught your expression and snorted. âRelax. Youâll find something. Or weâll hack one of these into shape. I donât care if Deanâs a certified panty-melter, he doesnât get to demand a wedding without giving you a dress to match.â
Lilah bounced over, hugging your thigh as you stepped down carefully in another gown, this one softer, flowier, hugging the bump instead of fighting it. Her eyes went wide. âThat one! Mommy, that one!â.
You met your own reflection, hand smoothing over the curve of your belly where Henry shifted under the fabric. For the first time that morning, your throat tightened.
Sally was already on her feet, grinning like sheâd won the lottery. âOh honey. Thatâs the one. No contestâ.
You blinked hard against the sting in your eyes. âItâs just⌠the first one that actually fitsâ, you mumbled, brushing a trembling hand over your bump. Henry kicked right on cue, like he agreed.
Then Sally peeked at the discreet little tag dangling behind the zipper. Her eyebrows shot up. âOofâ.
âWhat?â, you asked, instantly suspicious. You craned your neck, saw the numberâand nearly burst into tears. âOh, no. Nope. Forget it. Thatâs⌠thatâs insaneâ.
âSweetheartâ, Sally said carefully, âitâs a wedding dress. Theyâre all insaneâ.
But your chest was already tight, your pulse too fast. Between the heat, your low blood pressure, the hormonesâGod, the hormonesâyou actually felt your eyes blur. âI canât. I canât spend that much. Not on one day. Not whenââ. You broke off, pressing your palms to your cheeks.
âMommy?â, Lilahâs little voice piped up, muffled against your skirt. âYou donât like it?â.
You crouched as much as the dress and belly would allow, gathering her face between your hands. âBaby, I love itâ, you whispered, kissing her curls. âI just⌠itâs a lotâ.
Behind you, Sally fished your phone from your purse with zero shame.
âSallyâdonât you dareââ.
But she already had it against her ear, pacing toward the window. âHey, Winchester? Yeah, itâs me. Donât panic, everyoneâs fineâ. She smirked back at you, ignoring the daggers you were shooting her. âI just need to know how much money your fiancĂŠe is allowed to spend on looking amazing for youâ.
Your mouth fell open. âSALLYâ.
On the other end, you could hear Deanâs voice, tinny but sharp: âWhat? What the hell are you talking about? Put her on the phoneâ.
âNopeâ, Sally said cheerfully, twirling the dress tag around her finger. âSheâs currently hyperventilating because she thinks she canât buy the only dress that actually fits her eight-months-pregnant self. So. Whatâs the number, Dean?â.
There was a long pause. Then Deanâs voice, incredulous and rough: âThe number? Itâs whatever the hell it costs. She likes it?â.
âShe loves itâ, Sally said firmly.
âThen buy itâ, Dean snapped, like it was the easiest thing in the world.
Sally grinned triumphantly and mouthed, youâre welcome. Then, into the phone: âGood answer, Winchester. Iâll make sure she doesnât faint before the cashierâ.
Deanâs voice softened, muffled but unmistakable. âPut me on with herâ.
Sally handed you the phone like sheâd just won a prize. You pressed it to your ear, your voice already trembling. âDeanââ.
âSweetheartâ. His voice was a low rumble, steadying you through the line. âYou look beautiful, donât you?â. You let out a shaky laugh. âI donât even know what I look like right now, Deanâ.
âI doâ, he said simply. âI can see it in my head. And I donât give a damn about price tags. You hear me? Youâre my wife, and youâre gonna walk toward me in the dress that makes you feel like you. Thatâs it. Thatâs all that mattersâ.
A few minutes later, you stood at the counter, carefully draped over the attendantâs arms. Sally had one hand on your elbow like she didnât trust you not to faint, and Lilah was twirling in the middle of the boutique, humming to herself about how bee-utiful you looked.
The attendant cleared her throat gently. âWill this be on your card?â.
You fumbled for your purse, already wincing at the thought of the number. But before you could pull out your wallet, your phone buzzed in your other hand, Deanâs name lighting up the screen. A new text.
Dean: Use the black one with the gold stripe. Trust me.
You frowned, thumb tapping back.
You: Dean. Please tell me this isnât one of your fake ones.
His reply came instantly.
Dean: Doesnât matter. Itâll go through. Just swipe it. Iâll handle the rest.
You shook your head, laughing despite yourself. Only Dean Winchester could make dropping thousands on a wedding dress sound like hustling a pool table.
The attendant gave you a polite smile as you handed over the card. It beeped green on the first swipe. Approval.
Sally whistled low. âGuess your man knows what heâs doingâ.
âOh, he knowsâ, you muttered, half to yourself, pocketing the card again. Your phone buzzed once more.
Dean: Told you. Now stop worrying. Canât wait to see you in it. Iâll probably forget how to breathe.
Heat crept up your cheeks. You clutched the phone to your chest like a teenager, even as Sally caught you blushing and smirked knowingly.
The second you stepped through the door, Lilah exploded like a firecracker. âDaddy! Daddy! Mommy was a princess! Like a shiny, sparkly, twirly princess!â. She bounced in front of Dean, tugging at his hand with little fingers. âShe got such a pretty dress! You wonât believe it!â.
Dean crouched automatically, catching her mid-bounce and settling her on his hip. âA princess, huh?â. His eyes flicked to you, soft and amused. âGuess Iâll have to see this for myselfâ.
You felt your cheeks heat instantly. âIâuhâŚâ. You smoothed your hair back, suddenly nervous. âDo you⌠want me to try it on? For you?â.
For a moment, Dean looked tempted, his lips parting just slightly like the thought of you in that dress alone with him was too much to resist. But then his grin curved softer. âNahâ, he murmured, shaking his head. âNot yet. I wanna see it for the first time at the chapel. When youâre walking down to meâ. His throat bobbed. âThatâs the picture I want burned into my brain for the rest of my lifeâ.
Your heart thudded so hard you almost swayed where you stood.
Lilah frowned dramatically, her little nose scrunching. âBut Daddy, it was so pretty. I can draw you a picture!â.
Dean chuckled, pressing a kiss to her temple. âIâll take you up on that, Buzzâ. Then, his gaze shifted back to you. âBut the real thing? Thatâs mine to see on the dayâ.
After you and Lilah got out of your shoes and jackets, Dean guided te two of you up the stairs. âClose your eyes, Buzzâ, he teased as he scooped her into his arms halfway up the hall. âNo peekingâ.
Lilah squealed, throwing her hands dramatically over her eyes. âIâm not peeking!â, she promised, then immediately cracked one finger open.
Dean snorted. âThatâs cheatingâ.
At the top of the stairs, Sam leaned in the doorway with his arms crossed. âYou ready for the grand reveal?â.
Lilah nodded furiously, hands still slapped over her face.
Dean nudged the door open with his boot, carried her inside, and finally whispered, âOkay, Buzz. Lookâ.
Her hands dropped and her gasp nearly broke you.
The room was new. Not patched up, not just painted over, but hers. The old walls were gone, replaced with soft honey-yellow paint and white trim. A little desk sat under the window, already stocked with jars of crayons and glue sticks. Bookshelves lined one wall, filled with her picture books and in the corner was the brand-new bed frame Dean and Sam had built. Above it, painted carefully, a mural of flowers and bees dancing across the wall.
Lilah wriggled out of Deanâs arms and bolted across the room. âItâs mine! Itâs my room!â. She scrambled onto the mattress with a bounce. âThere are bees, Daddy! You painted bees!â.
Dean rubbed the back of his neck, a little sheepish. âWell, Sammy helpedâ. Sam raised both brows. âYou mean I held the stencil while you got glitter in the paintâ.
âItâs sparkly bees!â, Lilah crowed, already hugging the wall like it was alive.
Dean leaned against the doorframe beside you, his grin stretching ear to ear, pride practically glowing off him. âTold you sheâd love itâ.
You pressed a hand over your belly, smiling so wide your cheeks hurt. âShe does".
After dinner, Dean scooped Lilah up, sticky with sauce, and announced bath time. From the kitchen, you and Sam could hear all the splashes and giggles and Deanâs exaggerated monster voices.
Sam, drying the last plate, cleared his throat. âUh⌠heyâ.
You glanced at him. âWhatâs up?â.
He hesitated, eyes flicking to the hallway like he was making sure Dean couldnât hear. âYour friend. Sally. The one from the partyâ. Your brows lifted, but you stayed quiet. Sam rubbed the back of his neck. âShe, uh⌠is she⌠single?â.
You blinked, then smiled. âShe is. Sheâs a single momâ.
His shoulders eased just a little, but his cheeks went faintly pink. âShe seemed⌠niceâ.
âShe is niceâ, you said warmly, nudging his arm with your elbow. âSmart, too. And she doesnât take crap from anyone. Youâd like herâ.
Sam gave a little half-smile, trying to play it cool, but you saw the flicker of something hopeful in his eyes. Before you could tease him, a loud splash echoed from the bathroom followed by Deanâs exasperated, âLilah, did you just dump water on the ceiling?â and Lilahâs unapologetic giggle.
When the bathroom door finally creaked open, Dean cam out with his shirt clinging, jeans splattered and his hair a mess. In his arms was Lilah, swaddled tight in a towel and grinning ear to ear.
âShe wonâ, Dean muttered, trudging past you with mock defeat. âEvery damn timeâ.
âDaddy got wet!â, Lilah announced proudly, her curls plastered to her forehead.
You covered your laugh with your hand as Dean shot you a look that said donât even start. Then he carried her down the hall, still dripping, muttering about pajamas and clean sheets.
Sam was still leaning against the counter, shaking his head with a smile. âHeâs⌠good at thatâ, he said softly, almost like he couldnât believe what he was seeing.
âHe isâ, you agreed, watching Dean disappear into Lilahâs room. âBetter at braiding than me now, too. She wonât even let me touch her hair anymoreâ.
Sam chuckled, then grew a little quiet. His gaze shifted back to you.
You tilted your head, catching it. âSo⌠do you want her number?â. His brows rose. âSallyâs?â. âMhmâ. You smirked, folding your arms. âBecause sheâs been talking about you for days. I think sheâs just waiting for me to play matchmakerâ.
Samâs ears went pink again, his mouth twitching like he couldnât hide the smile even if he wanted to. ââŚYouâre serious?â. You nodded. âDead serious. She asked if you were âas good in real life as you are with glitter and pizza dutyââ.
Sam groaned softly, running a hand over his face, but he was still smiling. âGodâ. He shook his head. âYeah. Okay. Maybe⌠give it to meâ.
After Sam left, you let out a long breath and dropped onto the couch. Every bone, every muscle, every inch of you felt heavy. The baby was pressing low and your feet were aching.
Dean walked into the room a minute later. He stopped dead when he saw you sprawled there, one hand over your bump, your head tipped back. âYou okay?â.
You cracked one eye open, half a smile tugging at your lips. âIn three daysâ, you whispered, âIâm gonna be married. To the most unusual man aliveâ. Dean huffed out a laugh, lowering himself onto the couch beside you. âUnusual, huh?â.
You turned your head, studying him. âYeahâ, you said, a lump rising in your throat. âBut mineâ.
Dean leaned back against the couch, tugged your legs gently across his lap, and caught one of your ankles in his big hand. âSoâŚâ, he drawled, his thumb already circling against the sore arch of your foot, âno cold feet?â.
You let out something between a laugh and a groan, tipping your head back against the cushion. âYouâre literally making sure my feet arenât coldâ.
He smirked, kneading deeper, finding the spot that had been aching all day. âYeah, well. Just covering all the basesâ.
The pressure made your whole body sigh, your swollen ankles grateful for the attention. Your hand drifted over your belly out of habit, Henry shifting under your palm.
Deanâs grin softened as he watched. âYouâre really not nervous?â.
You cracked an eye open to look at him. âAbout marrying you?â. You paused dramatically. Then: âNeverâ.
-
The day before the wedding, Dean had been up early, kissing your temple before you were even fully awake, whispering, âMe and Buzz got errands. You restâ.
Errands, it turned out, meant a mission.
Heâd bundled Lilah into Baby and driven straight into town. She sat shotgun, swinging her legs, chattering the whole way.
âDaddy, does my dress have to be white like Mommyâs?â. âNot unless you want it to be, Buzzâ. âCan it be yellow? With sparkles? Like a real bee princess?â. Dean chuckled, one hand on the wheel, the other drumming the beat of her enthusiasm on the steering wheel. âYeah, weâll see what they got. But sparkles? Sparkles are non-negotiable, huh?â. She gasped. âDaddy, of courseâ.
At the boutique, every head turned the second they walked in. A man like Dean Winchester carrying a five-year-old who was already announcing, âI need the sparkliest dress for my mommyâs wedding!â, was a sight to stop traffic.
The saleslady blinked at him, then beamed. âFor the flower girl?â. âYes!â.
Dean crouched beside her, eye level, his hand braced on her little shoulder. âBuzz, what do you think? Wanna try some on?â.
She looked at him very seriously. âWill Mommy smile when she sees me?â.
Deanâs chest tightened. He smoothed a curl out of her face. âGuaranteedâ.
Dress after dress followedâpink, blue, ruffles too big, bows too itchy. Lilah twirled in each, her laughter ringing off the mirrors, Dean clapping like sheâd just won a medal. But when she stepped out in a soft yellow dress with tiny embroidered daisies scattered across the skirt and a sash that glittered faintly gold, her whole face lit up.
âDaddyâ. Her voice was a whisper, awed. âCan i have this?". Dean swallowed hard, his throat thick. âYeah, Buzz. Thatâs the one. You look perfect, baby girl. Just like Mommyâ.
âPerfect like Mommyâ, she repeated softly, like she was tucking the compliment into her pocket to keep forever. Then she launched forward, skinny arms wrapping tight around his neck, her little chin digging into his shoulder.
Dean caught her easily, pressing a kiss to her curls, breathing her in like he needed the anchor.
Her voice came muffled against his collar. âIâm glad youâre done saving the world, Daddyâ.
His arms locked around her automatically, his throat going tight. He shut his eyes for a beat, the memory of all those empty years pressing down on him. Then he leaned back just enough to look at her face, serious despite the sequins on her sash.
âYeah, Buzzâ, he rasped, brushing his thumb over her cheek. âIâm done. World can save itself for a whileâ.
She beamed, satisfied, and patted his stubbled jaw like she was sealing a deal. âGood. âCause Mommy and me need you moreâ.
-
The little chapel by the lake smelled faintly of lilacs and wood polish, the stained glass catching sunlight that spilled warm across the pews. It was smallâjust how Dean wanted it. Just how you needed it.
The guests filtered in with quiet excitement, not a crowd but a family. Jodie with Alex and Claire. Donna, bright as the morning itself, hugging everyone twice; Cas. And SamâSam with Sally at his side, her daughter Mia clutching a little basket of petals she kept peeking into like treasure.
Dean stood up front in a black suit that Sam had all but strong-armed him into wearing. The jacket fit snug across his shoulders, the tie sat crooked until Cas leaned in and straightened it without a word. Dean fidgeted anyway, rubbing his palms down the thighs of his pants, heart jackhammering like he was walking into a hunt he couldnât back out of.
And then the doors opened.
Lilah marched first, scattering petals down the aisle from her little daisy-yellow dress. She kept glancing back at you, making sure you were following. Every time she did, Deanâs hand twitched like he wanted to clap but remembered he wasnât supposed to.
And then he saw you.
The dress clung where it needed to, floated where it should, hugging your swollen belly like it had been made for you and Henry both. Your veil trailed just enough to brush the aisle floor, your bouquet trembling faintly in your hands.
Deanâs breath left him in one ragged exhale. His throat worked, his jaw flexed, and his eyes went glassy. He grinned, but it cracked halfway, breaking into something rawer, truer. He swore under his breath, so low only Sam caught it, and Sam just grinned like heâd been waiting for this exact moment.
Every step you took, Deanâs chest rose higher, like he was holding back a thousand words and could barely manage to stand under the weight of them.
When you finally reached him, Dean reached out. His fingers threaded through yours instantly, squeezing like a lifeline. And the moment your vows slipped into the air, his hands were already cradling your face and his lips found yours like theyâd been waiting all day.
The kiss wasnât rushed or showy. It was home. It was slow and deep, a little shaky and full of reverence. Like your lips were a promise heâd waited half his life to keep.
You smiled against him, tears slipping down your cheeks, and he brushed them away with his thumbs without breaking the kiss, just breathed into it, pulling you closer until there was no space left between your swollen belly and his trembling chest.
From the pews, someone sniffled. A second later, Lilah squealed, âUgh, youâre kissing forever!â, and that broke the spell just enough for laughter to bubble around the room.
Dean laughed into your mouth, resting his forehead to yours, eyes still closed. âDamn right we areâ, he whispered and then kissed you again.
-
The backyard glowed under strings of warm lights Dean and Sam had strung up that morning. The grill hissed and smoked as Sam worked it like while Donna kept stealing hot dogs straight off the platter and Jodie tried to swat her hand. The girls played tag with Lilah. And you? You were barely holding onto your plate.
Dean was behind you, his arms wrapped snug around your middle, hands splayed over your bump like he couldnât stand to let go. He swayed you gently from side to side in the rhythm of a song only he could hear, his lips brushing over the slope of your neck.
âCareful, Winchesterâ, you teased, trying to spear a piece of potato salad without dropping your fork. âYouâre making me look like I canât stand on my own two feetâ.
âYou donât have toâ, he murmured into your skin. He kissed just below your ear. âNot anymoreâ.
You shivered, your plate tilting dangerously until Dean steadied it with one hand. He chuckled, kissed the corner of your jaw, and drawled, âGoddamn. Miss Winchester lookinâ too good tonight. Think I married outta my leagueâ.
You rolled your eyes, but your lips curved anyway. âYouâre insufferableâ.
âYeah?â. He pressed another kiss, then another, like he couldnât stop. âCanât help it. My wifeâs gorgeousâ.
From across the yard, Donna whistled. âGet a room, newlyweds!â. Lilah popped up from behind the picnic table, hands on her hips, and yelled, âEwww! Daddyâs kissing Mommy again!â.
âBetter get used to it, Buzzâ, he called back, still swaying you softly. âIâm never stoppinââ.
A while later, youâd started to fan yourself with a paper plate, your dress clinging in ways it hadnât hours ago. The heat, the belly, the weight of the dayâyour body was calling time. And Dean caught it instantly. âCâmon, Mrs. Winchesterâ, he murmured in your ear, already sliding a steady hand around your back. âLetâs get you outta this before you meltâ.
You swatted him lightly with the plate. âSmooth, Deanâ.
âNot complaininâ about the viewâ, he shot back, that boyish grin tugging at his mouth. âBut youâre sweatinâ through silk, sweetheartâ.
He guided you inside. Upstairs, in the dim of your room, it was just the two of you again. He shut the door with his boot, the laughter outside muffled into nothing.
âArms upâ, he said gently. His hands were steady as he found the zipper at your back. Slow, deliberate, dragging it down inch by inch. His knuckles brushed bare skin, raising goosebumps despite the warmth.
The dress loosened, slid over your shoulders. Dean caught it before it could fall, easing the fabric down like it was precious. His lips found your shoulder.
"Dean".
âRelaxâ, he murmured, his mouth brushing your collarbone now. âJust gettinâ my wife comfortableâ. Then he knelt to slide soft cotton shorts up your legs, his hands a little slower than necessary, his lips pressing a kiss just above your knee.
Deanâs hands paused at your hips, thumbs hooking the soft cotton at the waist. He gave you one long look, then slid the shorts down again.
When his mouth came back up, it was higher: soft kisses along the line of your hip, along the side of your belly. His finger traced just under the edge of your panties, but instead of tugging further, he eased you back with a firm, steady hand at your hip. âSit, sweetheartâ, he murmured, guiding you down until you perched on the edge of the bed.
The mattress dipped beneath you. Dean dropped to his knees between your legs like heâd been born there, broad shoulders parting your thighs as he leaned in.
The second your weight settled, his mouth was on you. No hesitation. He hooked your underwear aside and sealed his lips to your center, sucking deep and hard like he already knew exactly what would rip the air out of your lungs.
You gasped, hands clutching instinctively at the sheets, then at his hair. âDeanââ. He groaned low at the sound, the vibration of it sparking through you.
Your thighs trembled instantly, knees trying to close around his head, but his big hands pinned you wide and steady against the mattress. âStay right there, sweetheartâ, he mumbled into you. Then he sealed his mouth over you again and sucked hard.
âDeanâoh my ââ. Your voice cracked, fingers yanking at his hair because it was too much, too good, too fast. He groaned again when you pulled his hair, the sound feral, hungry. His tongue worked in deep, slow strokes while his lips tugged and sucked like he was determined to wring every ounce of you out.
The pressure coiled hot and sharp in your belly within seconds. He slid one hand up, splayed it over your bump with a tenderness that contradicted the filth of what his mouth was doing. That grounding touch broke you. You cried out, thighs clamping helplessly around his head as your orgasm ripped through you. Dean held you steady, never letting up, swallowing every twitch and pulse, dragging it out until you were shaking against him.
When you finally slumped back on your elbows, gasping for air, he pulled away only long enough to lick his lips and grin up at you, chin slick and shining. âStill got itâ, he rasped, before diving back in like he wasnât finished.
âDean?â, Sam called muffled through the door but tight with concern. âLilah burned her hand on the grillâ.
Your heart stopped. Dean jerked back immediately. You scrambled upright, tugging your shorts back up with shaky fingers just as Sam added, âSheâs okay, just⌠some tears. Can youâ?â.
Dean was already wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, guilt and adrenaline snapping him into motion. When he opened the door, Lilah was on Samâs hip, her little face blotchy with tears, her other hand cradled carefully in Samâs palm. She sniffled the second she saw Dean. âDaddyââ.
Deanâs entire chest softened. He scooped her into his arms like she weighed nothing. "Buzz, what happened?â. His voice was low, soothing, a complete 180 from the man whoâd been between your thighs seconds ago.
Sam gave you an apologetic look over Deanâs shoulder as he explained, âShe touched the edge of the grill. It wasnât badâred, but no blister. I ran it under cool water, just figured sheâd want her dadâ.
âCâmere, lemme see that hand, baby girlâ, Dean murmured, already stroking Lilahâs damp cheeks.
Lilah sniffled again, holding it up for inspection. Dean pressed her palm gently to his chest. âItâs okay. Daddyâs got youâ.
-
Later, is was just you and Dean. In the bathroom, the tub full and steaming, the faint flicker of candlelight bouncing off the tiles. You leaned back against him, your head tucked under his jaw, his chest broad and warm behind you. His legs bracketed yours and his big hands rested over your belly. Every few minutes, Henry gave a thump against his hand, and Dean would huff a soft laugh like he still couldnât believe it. âKidâs already got my right hookâ, he murmured, pressing a kiss into your damp hair. âBet he comes out swinginââ.
You smiled faintly, your hand sliding over his, squeezing. âHeâs just stubborn. Like his dadâ.
Dean chuckled, his stubble scraping your temple as he nuzzled close. âYeah, but you love that about meâ.
Your laugh came out tired but true. âMost daysâ.
Another kick jolted against his palm, stronger this time. Deanâs hand tightened instinctively. âIf it werenât for him in there, Iâd have you bent over this tub alreadyâ.
You laughed, breathless, tilting your head back on his shoulder so your lips brushed his jaw. âThat a promise or a threat?â.
Dean groaned, squeezing your hips gently but firmly. âDonât tease me. I meant it. Four weeks, Iâve been goodâ.
You shifted a little on his lap, enough to feel him stir beneath you. âWho said I donât want it?â.
He swore under his breath, his forehead pressing to the side of your head. âYouâre eight months, Iâm notââ. His hand spread protectively over your bump. âIâm not takinâ chancesâ.
âDeanâ, you whispered, turning just enough to catch his mouth in a kiss. âIâm horny. And youâre hard. So maybe stop worrying so much and justââ. You nipped his lower lip. ââtouch meâ.
âSweetheartâŚâ. His voice was ragged. âDonât make meâdonât do this to me. Itâs notââ.
You twisted in his lap enough to face him, your knees bracketing his thighs, the swell of your belly pressing against him. You cupped his jaw with wet hands, kissed him deep, slow, messy, until his breath stuttered.
âItâs our wedding nightâ, you whispered against his mouth, your voice breaking into a whine that wasnât entirely put on. âI want you. Please, Deanâ.
He groaned, low and guttural, like youâd just torn his last thread of restraint. His forehead pressed to yours, his eyes squeezed shut. His hands slid up your thighs, trembling with the effort it took to hold back. âEight months pregnant, and youâre still the sexiest goddamn thing Iâve ever seenâ.
You rocked your hips against him, deliberately brushing the hard length trapped beneath the water, making him hiss through his teeth. âThen stop talking and fuck meâ.
Deanâs jaw clenched so hard you thought it might crack. His hands fisted at your sides, fighting himselfâand losing. Finally, he snapped. âFuck itâ.
His mouth crashed against yours, his hands hauling you closer, angling you over him in the tub. âYou win, Mrs. Winchesterâ, he mumbled against your lips, already lining himself up beneath the water. âBut donât blame me when you canât walk tomorrowâ.
The water sloshed up over the porcelain lip as Dean shifted beneath you, the heat of him pulsing against you before he slid home, slow but so deep it stole your breath. You gasped, nails digging into his shoulders. âOh, fuââ.
Deanâs head tipped back, jaw locked, a broken groan spilling out of him. âShit, sweetheart⌠been weeksâ.
You braced against his chest, moving as best as you could, but eight months in, your body didnât have the speed it used to. You rolled your hips instead, grinding down, and his answering growl vibrated right into your bones. âThatâs itâ, he whispered, kissing the damp skin of your throat. âJust like thatâ.
Your body betrayed you almost instantly. You were too sensitive now, too raw from the weeks without. Every slow grind had you clenching down hard around him, and every time you did, Deanâs whole body jolted like youâd shocked him.
âDamnââ, he hissed. His hands clutched your hips, holding you steady when you trembled. âYouâre squeezinâ me so tight, sweetheart⌠how the hell am I supposed to last?â. Your laugh broke into a gasp as another wave of sensation hit you. âThen donâtââ.
âDonât tempt meâ, he growled, thrusting up suddenly, hard enough to splash water over the tubâs edge. You whimpered. âDeanââ.
A few minutes later, you let Dean haul you up out of the tub. He wrapped a towel around your shoulders and knotted another low around his hips, then kissed your wet temple like he couldnât help it. âSit tightâclothes coming right upâ, he said, already stalking toward the dresser.
You reached for your bra on the counter⌠and felt three warm trickles slide down your thighs. You froze. Then a heavy pressure, your body deciding for you. Oh oh. You eased onto the toilet just as another swish hit the bowl. Well. Hello, Henry.
âDean?â, you called, weirdly calm. Second baby calm. âBabe⌠my water just brokeâ.
He reappeared in the doorway with an armful of clothes and went stock-still. âSon of a bitchâ, he muttered. âI knew itâI knew we shouldnâtâveâfuck, I knew itâ.
You blinked at him, caught between a laugh and disbelief. âDeanââ.
âNo, donâtâdonât tell me this ainât my faultâ. He was already scrubbing a hand through his damp hair, water flicking everywhere. âWeâJesus, sweetheart, we just⌠in the tub, and now your water breaks? Thatâs not a coincidence. I did thisâ.
You had to cover your mouth to keep from laughing, partly because he was so dead serious, partly because the truth, that Henry was just ready, wasnât going to stop him from spiraling. âDean Winchesterâ, you said firmly. âYou did not break my water by having sex with meâ.
His eyes snapped to you, panicked and stubborn all at once. âHow do you know?!â. He gestured helplessly toward you, toward the trickle down your legs. âLook at you! We finallyâyâknow, after weeks, and nowâbam! Kidâs knockinâ at the door!â.
You shook your head, laughing now. âHenryâs been sitting on my bladder for weeks. It was gonna happen anyway, Dean. Tonight just⌠happens to be the nightâ.
He stopped pacing, staring at you like maybe he wanted to believe but couldnât let go of the guilt yet. His chest heaved. âNot my fault?â, he asked finally, quieter, almost boyish. You reached out, catching his wrist. âNot your fault. Promiseâ.
Dean sagged, shoulders slumping with relief, but he still muttered under his breath as he crouched down in front of you, one big palm spreading protective over your belly. âStill feel like I should apologize to the kidâ.
Dean crouched there for another beat, his forehead pressed against your belly. Then he pushed back, stood and started moving. âIâll, uhââ. He bent to scoop up the pile of clothes heâd dropped, only to set them right back down again. âThe bag. Right. Whereâs the bag?â.
âIn the closet, by the doorâ, you said softly, watching him.
âRight. Okay. Bagâ. He nodded to himself, pacing to the doorway. His leg bounced once, twice, like he couldnât stop the nervous energy from spilling out. He gripped the doorframe, tried to make his voice calm. âWeâre good. We got time, right?â.
âPlentyâ, you assured him, leaning back against the toilet tank with a steadying breath. âContractions arenât even regular yet. First babies can take forever. Second ones still take a whileâ.
âRightâ. He nodded again, over and over, like he was trying to tattoo the word calm onto his own brain. But his leg bounced harder.
You reached out, catching his wrist as he passed. His pulse was hammering under your fingers. âDeanâ. He froze. âYouâre hereâ, you whispered, searching his eyes until he met yours. âThatâs all I needâ.
For a second his expression cracked. That raw grief he carried for missing Lilahâs first moments, for the years he wasnât there. His voice was rough when he spoke. âI wasnât there last timeâ.
Your throat tightened. You shook your head firmly. âYouâre here now. For me. For him. Thatâs what mattersâ.
Dean swallowed hard, then nodded once like he was trying to force the guilt down where it couldnât touch you. He bent again, kissing your damp forehead. âOkayâ, he murmured, steadying himself with your steadiness. âWe got this. I got youâ.
Dean practically sprinted around the house, bag in hand, keys already in his fist. By the time he got you settled in the passenger seat, towel exchanged for your favorite pants and a shirt, his leg was bouncing again, and his knuckles were white on the steering wheel. âSeatbelt on?â, he asked for the third time, glancing over at you.
âYes, Deanâ, you sighed, hiding a little smile.
Babyâs bag was wedged at your feet, your phone in your lap. You scrolled quickly, thumb hitting Samâs contact, and pressed speaker as Dean pulled out of the driveway.
On the other end of the line, Sam finally answered, voice groggy. âHello?â. Dean didnât even let you speak first. âHer water brokeâ, he blurted, voice rough. Sam was instantly awake. âWhat? Now?â.
You gave Deanâs hand a squeeze and cut in steady. âYeah, now. Weâre heading to the hospital. Is Lilah asleep?â.
âYeahâ, Sam said. âIâll keep her as long as you need me to. You focus on Henryâ.
Dean muttered a gruff, âThanks, Sammyâ and hung up before his brother could say more.
-
You were propped against the raised bed with a hospital gown loose around you and the IV already taped to your hand. The nurse had finished the first round of checks and slipped out with a smile, promising to check dilation again in a while. Translation: this was going to be a long night.
Dean sat in the chair beside you, knees spread wide, elbows braced on them like he was ready to jump into a fight at any second. His leg bounced restlessly and his eyes hadnât left you in twenty minutes. âYou okay?â, he asked again, for what had to be the tenth time.
You gave him a tired little smile. âDean, Iâm fine. Contractions arenât even bad yetâ.
âNot bad?â. His brow furrowed. âYou just winced like someone stuck a knife in youâ.
âThat was a crampâ, you corrected gently. âWeâre not even closeâ.
He scrubbed a hand down his face, muttering under his breath. âGod, this waitingâs worse than a huntâ.
You chuckled weakly, reaching for his hand. He gave it to you instantly, his palm hot and solid against yours. âDeanâ. You squeezed, forcing him to look at you. âYou donât have to do anything right now. Just be here. Thatâs itâ.
His eyes softened, but his shoulders stayed tight. âYeah, well, not sure Iâm cut out for the whole âjust sit thereâ jobâ.
âFunnyâ, you teased lightly, ââcause youâre actually killing itâ.
That pulled the smallest, crooked grin from him. He leaned forward, kissing the back of your hand, then held it against his chest like he needed the contact more than you did.
You watched his eyes keep flicking between your face and the green line of Henryâs heartbeat. When the next mild squeeze passed, you squeezed his hand back.
âHeyâ, you said softly. âCome sit up here. Youâre hovering a hole in the floorâ.
He huffed, dragged the chair closer so his knee bumped the mattress, then laid your joined hands over your belly. Up close, the tough-guy edges slipped; he looked a little younger and a lot more scared. âThis part⌠it just keeps reminding meâ, he murmured, eyes on your fingers instead of your face. âI wasnât there when Lilah came. Four years she had to do it without a dad, and she still turned into the kindest, loudest little miracle. I missed everythingâ.
You turned his chin gently until he met your eyes. âYou didnât make her kind by being gone, Dean. Sheâs kind because thatâs in her, because itâs in you. The cars and the glue and the buzzing? Thatâs you all over her. I just kept her safe till you found your way backâ.
He swallowed. âSometimes I look at her wall and⌠it feels like a ledger. All the pictures Iâm not inâ. âIt isnât a ledgerâ, you said firm. âItâs a map. It led you homeâ.
He let out a shaky laugh that wasnât really a laugh, then nodded. âHomeâ, he echoed, like he was trying the word on again.
You slid your thumb over his ring. âYouâre here for this one. For the midnight feedings, the diaper blowouts, the boring Tuesdays. For her, too⌠school plays, swing pushes, braids with glitter if she demands itâ.
âIâm already the braid guyâ, he muttered, a ghost of a smile tugging. Then, quieter: âIâm gonna spend the rest of my life showing up. Even when itâs not exciting. Especially thenâ.
âGoodâ, you whispered. âThatâs all either of them needâ.
He leaned in and pressed his forehead to yours. âIâm sorry I missed her first breathâ, he said, voice rough. âI wonât miss hisâ.
âI know", you whispered.
Deanâs throat worked, and for a beat he just stared at you, raw and open in a way that made your chest ache. Then, like clockwork, that need to cover vulnerability with something else crept in. His mouth tipped crooked. âYâknowâ, he drawled, thumb brushing slow over your skin, âlast time I had you spread out like this, there were a lot less wires involvedâ.
You groaned, smacking his shoulder weakly. âDeanâ.
âIâm just sayinâ, if you need a distraction, I got about a hundred ideas. Hell, I couldââ.
âDean Winchester, shut upâ, you hissed, half laughing, half horrified.
And of course, right then the door opened. The doctor walked in. âLetâs check your progress, shall we?â.
Dean sat up straighter instantly, clearing his throat like a guilty teenager. âUhâyeah. Great. Progress is good. We love progressâ.
You buried your hot face in your pillow as the doc pulled on gloves.
The doctor glanced between you two with the faintest lift of her brow before focusing on the exam. âNot quite there yetâ, she reported after a moment. âAbout three centimeters. Still some time to goâ.
Dean exhaled hard, like heâd been holding his breath through the whole thing, then muttered under it, âThree centimeters. Huh. Usually I can get you toââ. âDean!â, you cut him off, mortified, smacking him again.
The doctor pretended not to hear, tugging her gloves off with a snap, though you swore you saw the corner of her mouth twitch.
As soon as the door clicked shut, you groaned into your hands. âYou are insufferableâ.
Dean just grinned, kissing your temple. âAnd you love me for itâ.
Hours unspooled in soft beeps and low light. The lake-black outside the window turned slate, then pearl. You dozed in ten-minute scraps between the milder waves; Dean didnât blink. He timed every squeeze on his phone, then looked up with a brand-new question each time.
âSo when he comes outâdoes he, like⌠breathe right away? Orââ.
You smiled, sleepy. âHeâs been practicing in fluid. Once heâs out, heâll clear it and cry. The cry helps open everything upâ.
Dean nodded, storing it like intel. âOkay. Crying is good. For onceâ. He glanced at the monitor. âAnd he canât⌠yâknow⌠drown before that? I know itâs a dumb question, butââ.
âItâs not dumbâ, you said. âCordâs still doing the job till he starts on his ownâ.
âRight. Backup lineâ, he murmured, oddly comforted. âCan I cut it?â.
âIf you donât faintâ.
He snorted. âI delivered a ghoulâs head once. I can handle a cordâ.
-
Three hours later the room had shifted. The contractions had teeth now. Every time one hit, it tore a groan right out of you, your nails biting into Deanâs hand. He never pulled away, even when your grip went white-knuckle.
âBreathe with me, sweetheartâ, he tried once. âIn through the nose, out through theââ. âShut up, Dean!â, you snapped, heat and pain slamming through you.
He winced like youâd shot him, but nodded fast. âYep. Shutting. Quiet as a church mouse. A very helpfulââ.
âDEANâ.
âRight. Silentâ. He pressed his lips together.
Another wave hit. You curled forward, sweat slicking your brow, a low, guttural sound breaking out of you. Dean made a noise with you half instinct, half helplessness, like his body thought it could share the pain if it just tried hard enough.
The doctorâs voice cut through: âOkay, weâre close. Next one, I want you to pushâ.
Deanâs hand was shaking in yours. He swiped his thumb across your knuckles. âAlmost there, babyâ.
The doctor leaned forward, her voice steady but firm. âWeâve got crowning. Keep breathing, almost thereâ.
Dean risked just a glance. He shifted at your side, craning his neck despite himself. One look between your legs and his face went slack, eyes wide. âHoly shitâ, he breathed. âSweetheartâI can see him. I can see him. Heâsâheâs got hair, oh my god, heâs right thereââ.
You let out a furious hiss, teeth bared, sweat dripping into your eyes. âDEAN. Not helping!â.
He snapped back upright instantly, squeezing your hand like a lifeline. âRight. Sorry. Justâyouâreâheâsââ. He made a helpless noise, a wrecked mix between laughter and a sob. âGod, heâs⌠heâs right there. Push, baby, pushâbring him outââ.
Another contraction slammed through you, and you bore down hard, everything inside you clenching, burning. Dean groaned right along with you.
Then the room filled with the sharp, wet cry of a new life.
Dean blinked hard, jaw tight, his throat bobbing as he forced down the swell rising like a tide.
âStrong set of pipesâ, the nurse quipped, but Dean barely heard her. He was staring like heâd never seen anything holy before.
When they laid Henry on your chest, the crying stuttered, softened, the tiny body rooting instinctively against your skin. You gasped, tears spilling, both hands trembling as you gathered him close.
Dean leaned in but froze half an inch away, his breath caught, his eyes rimmed red. He clenched his jaw so hard a vein stood out, fighting itâdonât cry, not here, not in front of them. He dragged a hand down his face, muttered a curse under his breath.
But then Henryâs tiny fist flexed, caught nothing but air. Dean couldnât stop himself. He caught that hand with one finger, let it curl impossibly tight around him.
His head ducked instantly, as if he could hide it in the curve of your shoulder, but his voice betrayed him, wrecked and breaking. âHi, buddy. HeyâŚâ. He sniffed hard, shaking his head. âGod, youâre perfectâ.
The doctor and nurses busied themselves, polite enough to let the moment stay yours. Deanâs shoulders shuddered once, sharp, before he forced his breathing back under control. He kissed your damp hair, his voice low, shaky against your temple. âYou did it, sweetheartâ, he whispered.
You stroked Henryâs damp hair with trembling fingers, your lips brushing his crown. Dean hovered, his forehead pressed briefly to yours before he straightened at the nurseâs quiet prompt. âWant to cut the cord?â.
âYeahâ, he rasped. âYeah, I got itâ.
He lined up the blades, heart hammering in his ears while he cut the cord. He let out a long breath, half a laugh, half disbelief, handing the scissors back.
The nurse moved Henry gently to weigh and clean, his cry filling the room again. Dean followed every step like a shadow, his hand unconsciously braced at your shoulder as if tethering you both.
Then she guided the baby into Dean´s arms, careful. For a heartbeat, he froze, his chest barely moving with breath. Fear, awe, disbeliefâall of it tangled in his face. His thumb brushed instinctively over the blanket edge near Henryâs chin, and the baby squirmed, a little squeak tumbling out. Deanâs whole body jolted. âShitâsorry, bud, I didnâtââ. His voice broke, quiet and panicked. But Henry just settled, tucking into the crook of his arm like it was the only place he belonged. Deanâs lips parted, eyes burning as he whispered, almost to himself, âThatâs my boyâ.
You watched him, your chest aching in a way you hadnât expected. Youâd seen Dean bleed out on motel bathroom floors, seen him laugh in bars with a beer bottle dangling from his fingers, seen him broken and stitched back together. But this? This was different. This was raw.
The nurses moved quietly around you with warm cloths, gentle instructions and the kind of care you half-heard and half-obeyed. But Dean? Dean was somewhere else entirely.
He sat hunched forward in the chair, Henry swaddled tight in his arms, the newbornâs face still flushed, eyes little more than slits. Dean kept his head bent close, his lips moving in a steady stream of words you couldnât quite catch.
Every so often, Henry made a tiny sound and Dean would pause, grin like the world had just cracked open, then go right back to murmuring.
âGot a sister waitinâ for you, buddyâ, he whispered, his thumb brushing Henryâs cheek. âSheâs the loud one. Youâre gonna love herâ.
Henry squirmed, his mouth working around some invisible dream. Dean chuckled under his breath, softer than youâd ever heard. âThatâs it⌠already got opinions, huh? Just like your momâ.
The awe in his voice was unmistakable. He was cataloging everything. From the way Henryâs tiny fingers curled against the blanket, the almost-blue shade of his eyes behind heavy lids to the squashed little nose. It was like he couldnât stop staring, couldnât believe this wasnât something fragile heâd only ever dreamed about.
He leaned closer, pressing his lips to the crown of Henryâs head. âUncle Sammyâs across the street. Thatâs your guy. Heâll teach you the boring stuff⌠and Iâll teach you how to drive before youâre supposed to. Donât tell your momâ.
You watched, half-dazed from exhaustion, half undone by the sight of him.
Dean hadnât moved for twenty minutes, maybe more. He hadnât noticed the nurse coming in and checking your IV. Hadnât even heard the clack of the monitor adjusting. He was in his own little worldâjust him and Henry. Youâd never seen him so still.
You smiled softly. âHeyâ. He blinked, like waking up from a dream, and looked over at you. âYou okay?â.
You nodded, slow and tired. âThink I could hold our kid now, or are you planning on raising him from that chair?â.
Dean huffed out a breath. Carefully, reverently, he walked over and lowered Henry into your arms. The second your hands took him, Dean leaned over the bedrail, his arms caging you both in. He kissed your forehead, then your temple, then the shell of your ear, his lips lingering like he wasnât quite done grounding himself. âJesus, youâre incredibleâ, he whispered. âI donât know how the hell you just did that, but⌠you didâ.
Your lips curved into a soft, tired grin as you brushed a fingertip over Henryâs tiny nose. âWell⌠I had a really cute baby to look forward toâ. Deanâs chest rumbled with a laugh against your hair, but you tilted your head up just enough to catch his eye. âThoughâ, you added, smirking faintly, âI gotta say⌠this is getting a little unfairâ.
Dean frowned playfully. âWhat is?â.
You angled Henry slightly so Dean could see the little furrow between his brows, the shape of his jaw already set, stubborn even at just hours old. âHe looks exactly like you. Even worse than Lilahâ.
Dean blinked, then laughed outright, dropping his forehead to your temple. âOh, câmonâworse?â.
âWay worseâ, you teased, though your voice was warm. âItâs like my genes just threw in the towel. Weak. Completely overpoweredâ.
Dean chuckled again, but there was pride in it. Pride and something a little watery in the way his eyes softened. He looked down at Henry, then back at you, his thumb brushing your cheekbone. âGuess that means I gotta stick around, huh?â, he murmured. âCanât have two mini-mes runninâ around without supervisionâ.
You let out a tired laugh, pressing your face into his chest. âGod help meâ.
Dean grinned, kissing the top of your head. âNah. God helped me. Gave me you, Buzz, and now this guy. Canât ask for more than thatâ.
âââââââââââ
A/N: Please let me know what you think.đĽ°Â
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Part 13
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POV: Your camera roll if you were dating Dean Winchester
Sam Version








