. . . πππ ππ π πππππ πππππ πππ ππππππ π ππππ ππππ π πππ πππππ .α£ β« β.Λ
π read part one !
DEANβS HEAD HURTS. thatβs the first thing he feels, when his mind decides to pull him out of sleep. that, and he feels warm all overβbut not uncomfortably so. more like that feeling when a towel is wrapped around you from being freshly out of the dryer.
he also smells something really good. familiar, but he canβt piece together who or what smells like thatβmaking his brain all fuzzy that had nothing to do with his raging headache heβs experiencing. he doesnβt necessarily want to get up, but somethingβ¦ doesnβt feel right, despite the cloud of inebriation hanging over him.
first, this isnβt his bed, he realizes after a few moments, because if it was, heβd be getting a much different whiff of these sheets. instead of smelling like his deodorant and faintly of beer, the sheets smell likeβ¦
you.
he freezes, when the thoughts set in. heβs in your bed. on your sheets. and his face is in one of your pillows.
jesus. deanβs head pounds again, as he adjusts his body slightlyβand his arm catches on something that seems to not be a pillow or your blanket. despite his protesting head, he knows that it is in fact, again, you.
dean has an overwhelming urge to run. to leap out of your bed and never see the inside of your room again. he doesnβt know how he got you to stay here with you, let alone sleep in your bed next to youβbecause he wasnβt that convincing. not sober, at least.
he blinks his eyesβadjusting to the little light in your room. the bunker had no windows, so it didnβt take long. from what he can tell, youβre still asleep.
next to him.
in your bed.
this is not how he imagined things would go between you. he could make a break for it now, he thinks. just slip out and leaveβbut he knew that you hadnβt been drinking last night like he had, so youβd remembered everything dean said and did.
oh, god, what did he say?
he canβt remember. dean tries to recall anything he said last night after sammy had been telling him for the millionth time to tell you how he felt about you, but he canβt remember. the one time he absolutely needs to remember, he canβt.
your voice breaks dean out of his spiraling thoughts. youβre looking at him when he focuses back on you, and you donβt look upset. thatβs a good sign. you donβt want to kill him. usually he says stupid things when he gets drunkβand whatever he said to you wasnβt stupid enough to get him kicked out.
βhey,β dean raspsβthen clears his throat, tries againβbut it sounds the same. you smile at that, and he pretends to be annoyed with his throat being shot to hell. he must have slept with his mouth wide open.
you sit up more, reaching over to your nightstand, facing dean with a water in your hands. the gestureβs small, yet dean almost melts into your bed again. instead, however, he sits up, too, chugging the water down.
βuhββ dean starts after he sets the now empty water down, βdid, i, uh, yβknowβ how bad did i mess this up?β
you tilt your head at him, scanning his face. sleep is still lingering over your expression, your eyes low and voice raspier. you look beautiful. you sound beautiful. βyou donβt remember anything?β dean pauses, then shakes his head.
oh. you donβt know how to tell him what he said. it might make him spontaneously combust if you tell him just what he said to you last night. but you know, deep down, that you canβt keep this a secret. hell, youβve wanted to tell him since he passed out next to you hours prior.
βyou, uhβ¦ kinda said youβ¦ had feelings for me.β you start, eyes on your blanket. βi mean, you didnβt say that verbatim, butβ¦ you were saying how i like, know what youβre thinking. and that your heart does a weird thing when you look at me. so. i just, uhβ¦ assumed thatβs what you were saying, too.β
well, dean wants to crawl into a hole and die. more so than usualβbecause not only did he spill his guts, he didnβt even remember it. he runs a hand through his hair, shaking his head. he wants to take it all back. he rasps your name again, but you cut him off when you continue.
βyou said you couldnβt stop thinking about me. andβ¦β you take a deep breath. βi said, i couldnβt stop thinking about you, either. and i said i care about you, more than anyone. and thatβs the truth. βcause iβ¦ do.β
and dean knows youβre not lying. because youβre nervous, he realizes when youβre not meeting his gaze, probably more nervous than he is. so dean takes your hand thatβs fidgeting with the hem of your blanket, holds it in his own.
βyβknow iβ¦ yβknow i care about you, too, right?β dean asks, searching your face. you nod, meeting his gaze.
βyeah. i know.β
so dean takes that. he might not be able to say what and how he really, truly feels yetβbut he knows you know.
and thatβs enough for him, for now.
π¨ thank you to @beakaleak32 for giving me ideas for a part 2! <3 reminder that august is coming up, so i will not be as active soon! read more here :)
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