I haven't been present on social media or my blog for a while. I have struggled with mental health issues and for the first time I decided to ask for help, so in last months I have been supported by professionals to understand what it's happening to me and how I can change that for the better. I am still continuing the therapy and remain under mental health team, facts that are reassuring and give me strength. I have been very emotional and suffered panic attacks, had outbursts of tears and constant worries for a very long time. I postponed the moment of calling for help thinking these may be normal, everyone is stressed, everyone has problems and hoped everything will be okay. It got to a point when I got behind with house chores so bad, I had mountains of clothes and dishes everywhere, and thought I cannot finish these tasks. The more I tried to be proactive and organise myself, keep my motivation up and even made a to do book where I wrote down what needed to be done and treated each day like I was at work, the more I struggled and felt useless, a bad role model for my daughter, a bad wife, daughter and friend. I felt I am disappointing everyone around me and that everyone would me better off without me. Each day was dragging and I could not understand how I got to this point. The thing that made me realise I need help was my daughter trying to reassure me when I got upset and wearing the mum clothes for me, when I should've been the one supporting her. That's when I knew that things have to change and I have to become more responsible for this tiny human being in front of me That I love so much. Now, after almost 2 months of therapy and support I feel out of the woods. I still have good and bad days and I still struggle at times, but the quality of my life changed amazingly. If you are struggling too, please seek help! I contacted my GP and from there I was advised what to do next and I was given options of treatment and support. I was told I suffer with depression and anxiety. Please look after yourself and know you are not alone! #mentalhealthawareness #dealingwithdepressionandanxiety #stressedmum #motherhood #youarenotalone (at Rotherham) https://www.instagram.com/p/CN75EVSltBd/?igshid=1hpuxsprg6z7u
