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Character Prisoner/Dating Profiles: Main (Base Game) Dateables

(Some) Of the Side Characters / Secondary Dateables

I had to ask my parents why fish pictures are considered unattractive on dating websites! I genuinely did not understand this one. I have about a million pictures of myself and people I love with fish we caught (and released). There is a reasonably even number of silly "kiss the fish" type pictures and more generic "holding up the fish to demonstrate how big it is" pictures.

I cherish each and every one of these as they all carry memories of beloved fishing trips, and would consider many of them prime candidates for putting on a dating profile if I was into dating. Hence my confusion.

Their explanation was multifaceted and illuminating.

Allow me to break it down:

A) The problem originated not with fish pictures, but with an entire profile full of only fish pictures, and "fish picture" in the singular only gained negative association after dating sites became inundated with the latter.

B) Dating website pictures are supposed to give a snapshot into your life and hobbies (I did know this). An entire profile full of just fish pictures indicates you have no other hobbies. I also knew this, but I also know there are people who get away with just having yarn craft pictures or just pictures of them with animals, so why the ire for fishing specifically?

C) "Fishing," in the mind of the general populace who doesn't fish, is considered an activity where you keep and eat every fish, meaning it inherently requires killing something. This is a misconception BTW. Me and the vast majority of people I know who fish do catch and release. You pull a fish out of the water. You take a picture. You put it back in. Unless it's invasive, then you keep it because it doesn't belong there. Occasionally we fish to eat, but this is mostly a camping activity.

C2) This is not to say the majority of people who have a singular hobby of fishing do catch and release. It simply says the majority of people I know who fish are like this, which is a rather biased pool since it mostly consists of my extended family.

D) Even to those who are aware that fishing doesn't necessarily equal murder, it is still seen as a "macho" hobby, and not something that people who are sensitive and romantic and emotionally available would engage in.

This is objectively incorrect and I believe rooted in mysoginistic thinking patterns.

You want to know who taught me to fish? My mother. Who has been in a stable and loving relationship for over two decades. And my father also fishes, although not quite to her level. You know who else took me on a lot of fishing trips? My paternal grandparents, who would say at the end of their lives when they were both failing in health: "Between the two of us, we make one whole person."

You know who else fishes? My aunts and uncles who have all been in loving stable relationships long enough to have grandchildren in the 5th grade. And my cousins who are the parents of said grandchildren. And my maternal aunts who have children in high school. And my maternal grandparents who aren't quite as hopelessly romantic as my paternal ones but have still been together for like 40 years and haven't murdered each other yet.

Fishing does not equal "unsuitable romantic partner." It doesn't even make you inherently butch or masculine---my mother is very girly. She makes her own earrings and likes dress shopping and sparkly makeup and interior decorating. She also likes fishing. And camping. And cadavers. People can be multifaceted.

I also maintain that fishing TOGETHER with people you love makes a great date! You need to pick a spot where you can sit close enough to talk to each other and not get your lines crossed (boats are good for this). But it gives you multiple hours with nothing to do but stare at the water and be with each other.

So In Summary:

Fish pictures aren't unattractive, you just need to be open to trying a new hobby

And examine why you think fishing equals masculine and/or non-ideal romantic interest

Also maybe don't fill your dating profile with only one type of picture in general, I can understand that one

You have to admit, Felony Carl’s profile sends up the least amount of red flags; his is honest and to the point. ;) XD Love that Hiro had such a problem when he got to Carl’s page; maybe he should have mentioned how much he loves animals. XD (I'm betting he took his profile down after “Countdown to Catastrophe” ;) ).

Send ‘💟’ and I’ll write a potential blurb for my muse’s dating profile.

“Mom, stop sending me these shady dating sites!” Zeta was growing increasingly more exasperated with her mother, the advertisement of, what she believed to be yet, another dating show forcefully popped under her nose. She got it, her mother was concerned. Academics kept her busy; teaching the undergraduates while pursuing her own Ph.D. and then the long, long functions that lasted well into the early morning hours. Whatever spare time Zeta was left with was spent catching up on work she hadn’t gotten to before, paperwork mostly, or sleep. Whatever holidays she had were also taken, with sleep and her own research, for what was time but robbed from those wicked enough to sign for an academic career?

“Just give it a chance!” her mother begs, and Zeta resists the urge to roll her eyes, knowing that this will not do her any favours in the conversation to follow. “Besides, this isn’t a dating show, or a site,” her mother continues, hushing up whatever protest there is as she shoves the paper towards Zeta, “these are dating profiles. Just pick one you like and go on a date, no strings attached, and no cameras either!”

Nothing felt more mortifying than having a mother play matchmaker, and Zeta felt herself flush at the thought of whatever type of man her mother could have picked for her. Definitely not a ginger, she knew from past judgements coming from her mom, but what was the rest of the criteria to which her mother had picked? “Just read through the profiles and pick one, if you don’t like the date I will treat you on lamb chops the next time you are home,” her mother promises, and that’s what ultimately has Zeta convinced, carefully peeking at the list of suitors presented:

Dating Profiles: 

Date #1: Male, average height and of renowned beauty equalling his intelligence. Responsible and dependable, he is someone with great career prospects and greater loyalty. Looking for a partner that shares a love for poetry and academics. Hoping to find someone sweet in character that will match his great pride, but also of gentle temperament that can coax his confidence.

Date #2: He is someone who is known for his unwavering faith for his friends and what he believes in. His friends may describe him as brash and stubborn but they also admit it also traces back to complete loyalty for the people he cares about. While only being average in height, he makes up for it in physicality. With almost no experience in the dating world, he can be a bit shy with women. He is looking for someone who will be able to match his energy; he wants someone to be completely himself with - who he can joke around with but also be vulnerable with.

Date #3: A connoisseur of all that is sweet and appreciator of sugar. Tall when standing straight and fluent in at least seven languages. Dedicated to his job and well-travelled, this is a man that is looking for a lady that likes pastries as much as he does, and won’t judge him for his habits. 

Date #4: Well traveled male, tall, unusual coloured eyes and of lean built, with a talent for cooking and business alike. Looking for someone who is not too shy to try out new things and open for the occasional adventure out on the sea between working days. His person shouldn’t be too sensitive with words, since he has a rather sharp tongue and little up to no filter. Despite the lack of understanding of social cues, he is an intelligent conversation partner and values a civil talk about anything else.

Date #5: Male. Rarely fully betrays his full height for a slack posture alongside his easy and calm composure. Dates will be arranged with a loosely set time considering a busy schedule. Easy-going, relaxed and utterly dedicated to his friends, he is looking for someone with a brighter outlook in life; honesty and a directed passion. Keep in mind working hazards - allergies to dogs will make this impossible.

Date #6:  Male. Has the education and license of a doctor, but head emptier than a mutton-headed dolt. If you can get passed his fruitless womanizing, his sore loser attitude (he never plays a game he won’t win), and his coffee addiction, then you’ve got yourself a hopeless romantic who’s exceptionally clever. There’s never a dull moment in his company, and he does owns a little playful pup, so that’s a plus. Expect lots of dog walks and mystery adventures together because that’s about the only things that he can boast about without getting smacked.

Date #7: An average statured male whose eyes will captivate you with one glance. He is someone who has yet to settle down since he’s been ‘dating his job’ since he got it. Armed with wit and a sharp tongue, you can’t take him at face value - he needs someone he can slowly let break down his wall. With a keen eye for beauty, he can easily identify the most beautiful masterpieces - including personalities. When asked what he’s looking for, he said someone who would follow at his heel with complete loyalty. Most of his friends seem to think he needs a strong woman who isn’t afraid of speaking her mind and can hold her own.

Date #8: A rare beauty with a good appreciation for a good drink. Protective to a fault of those he loves he inspires and commands great loyalty from all whom he encounters. A natural within his field with a hidden sensitivity buried deep within the many layers in which he covers himself. A man looking for someone worth fighting the world for!