dating objects around your house and understanding their sentient thoughts, stories and emotions? that was sick as fuck, totally fun and interesting! do you know what wasn’t? having the sudden realisation that all these inanimate objects have watched you laze around the whole house in a way that’s less than appropriate.

we’re talking ass out with a baggy shirt for the bare minimum modesty; occasionally, topless when the AC decides to work good that day; a cozy robe after your bath, showing just the slightest tantalising slope of what’s beneath; and when you’re particularly lazy? just a towel.

there was no way you were going to be doing any of that while holding the frightening knowledge that they can see, and worse, comment on your habits.

because what’s worst than your neighbours catching a glimpse of a naked shoulder? all the objects in your house having front show tickets. to fight that inherent embarrassment, you clung to your clothes like a shield—with little thought as to how the others would react to your sudden shift from playboy bunny magazine cover to nun. (spoiler; they hate it!)

ദ്ദി(˵⎚ᴗ⎚ ˵ ) ᢉ𐭩 AMIR

‪♡ he noticed immediately.

‪♡ how could he not? he’s your mirror, your confidante, your lover—nothing pains him more than seeing less of the form he used to admire so freely especially when it’s very evident from the sweat patches pooling where your limbs meet that this sudden dress change has caused you even more discomfort.

‪♡ “azizam, what reason do you have for dressing yourself like…” his voice cuts off, his captivating grey eyes giving you a completely overt once-over. “well, that—in such weather? i’m sure i can fit you in something much more suitable.”

‪♡ he’s not one to particularly pry on what you wear because anything you wear is perfection, but part of him really does miss seeing your bare shoulders…the gentle curve of your back, the soft fat of your thighs—simply, some sights shouldn’t be reserved.

‪♡ he’s a little more subtle with his pleading—it’s your decision at the end of the day, but if you ask him? he will not shy away from telling you that he really misses getting to look at your bare form, and somehow, when it comes from him? it doesn’t feel demeaning or disrespectful, he looks at you the same way the sun looks at the moon.

‪♡ oh, but if you do decide to go back to wearing so little? rest assured he’ll find it impossible to not go on long rants about how gorgeous you look (while sneaking in a few gentlemanly kisses).

ദ്ദി(˵⎚ᴗ⎚ ˵ ) ᢉ𐭩 BETTY

‪♡ she sees you every day so she was definitely the first to notice this sudden change in wardrobe, and while normally she wouldn’t comment…what do you think you’re doing?

‪♡ it’s not the fact that you’ve been sweating through your sheets for days now, or the fact you’ve kicked off nearly every blanket on the bed due to the excess heat, it’s the fact that you don’t even consider letting her cover your naked form!!

‪♡ dress up like a nun all you like baby, but for the love of god take off the sweater and hide under the covers if you’re really that worried she can FEEL you tossing and squirming from overheating.

‪♡ part of her wants you to go back to the free wardrobe for your comfort and another much louder part of her wants you to do so because the silk of your skin feels so much more alluringly sweet than the scruffy fabric of your dusty shirts.

‪♡ then again…she has to look at it in the more pleasing way too—this way, she can spend hours fantasising about what exactly you’re hiding beneath those clothes. sometimes the chase is better than the reward, no?

ദ്ദി(˵⎚ᴗ⎚ ˵ ) ᢉ𐭩 FREDDY

‪♡ the fridge is one of the first places you go to during the summer: ice cream, fresh fruit, cubes of ice to slot in whatever drink you need to refresh yourself with and that absolutely lovely immediate cooling from the freezer whenever you open it? pure bliss.

‪♡ so how come it seems like freddy has been ‘malfunctioning’ more than usual nowadays?

‪♡ “oop—sorry, cool kid, i’ll get you another right now!” as the nth ice cream drops into a splurge of vanilla on the floor, alongside the cumulating puddle now soaking the edge of your sweats.

‪♡ you can’t even count how many times he’s told you how he can’t allow you to sit in front of the freezer while you’re waiting for food to cook to “save energy” (it’s totally not because he’s patiently waiting for you to take off that cardigan, no way! you know, it’s just…the energy, yeah!)

‪♡ he doesn’t even do any of this with the intention to creep on you, he just loves and absolutely misses how squishy and adorable you look when you’re lounging on the kitchen counter while waiting for the timer to tick for your chicken nuggets, it’s so cute!!

‪♡ yes, maybe the way your thighs press together and the way you lean back to show off a sliver of stomach also gets him antsy but he swears if you don’t want him looking, he won’t! (but also please let him see something, he promises to keep you real cool if you do).

ദ്ദി(˵⎚ᴗ⎚ ˵ ) ᢉ𐭩 HECTOR

‪♡ he’s too attentive to your every want and need to ever play about with the air conditioning during the summer, but, he’d be a massive fool to deny how much he absolutely winces when he watches you walk around the house clothed head to toe with a clear discomfort shadowing your face.

‪♡ the others have certainly attempted to try bribing him into warming the house up solely because they think your new attire is ridiculous. okay, frankly most of them are complaining because they can’t peep a glance at you now, but can you blame them? they’re so used to you being so languid and free, this shit sucks!

‪♡ his voice is low and gentle when he randomly mumbles: “my love, is there…are you not feeling overheated in those…clothes?” when you mention how weird it feels walking around knowing everyone can actively see and have opinions on you…he gets it completely! it’s not like he has any right to judge you and all…but it doesn’t make him any less sad…

‪♡ because to him? you’re so beautiful :( and lovely :( your body is perfect and deserves to be shown without shame :( what do you mean it sounds ironic coming from him? :)) ‪

ദ്ദി(˵⎚ᴗ⎚ ˵ ) ᢉ𐭩 MITCHELL LINN

‪♡ he’s a gentleman, so he wouldn’t dare outwardly comment on your chosen apparel…ooh but does he loathe it though.

‪♡ the slick slide of ice cream as it pools down the naked slope of your chest; the way you lick your fingers clean from a melting ice-lolly when it sticks to your skin; the sound of a slurp when you eat watermelon, the fresh juice dripping down your chin: those are some of the delicacies that mitchell wouldn’t trade for even the highest quality truffle.

‪♡ now?? food drops onto your shirt, mingling into the sharp scent of sweat, you curse and gasp every time you ruin another pair of shorts and while he does feel the slightest bit guilty, he does find it simultaneously humorous how each time you hesitate to take your ruined clothes off. those little hesitant flickers of your eyes? his new favourite thing to watch.

‪♡ when you come to him to ask for meals that you could make and or snack on to get rid of the heat he very eagerly wants to tell you: “please, just change into something shorter.” but that would be way too distasteful for a man of his calibre.

‪♡ if you do ask him whether he misses it or not, he’ll try to sugarcoat it as lightly as possible because honestly…the softness of your skin is so much more tantalising to touch and caress than the sturdy material of a sweater. he won’t look…too much.

ദ്ദി(˵⎚ᴗ⎚ ˵ ) ᢉ𐭩 TYRELL

‪♡ NOOOOO!!! PLEASE! this is the one thing he had above most of the others…getting to be fully skin to skin with you, having you trust him enough to wrap around your luscious body to soak up all that warm water…this was unfair (he’s not jealous of bathsheba or river for getting to feel your body in its full regardless if you were embarrassed or not…he isn’t!)

‪♡ and don’t think he hasn’t noticed you using him much less or at least much more hesitantly!! he’s never complained about it before but this was starting to bother him because eating dirt off the floor is so much less fun than getting to dry you from your own sweat.

‪♡ so yes, maybe he has started to discreetly write notes and place them on the towels shaped exactly like your favourite animals just to garner your attention…is it working? :3c please say yes.

‪♡ don’t blame his hand for wandering beneath your shirt to wipe away at the sweat that’s glistening at your navel, he’s like a siren to water (quite literally). it’s in his nature!

ദ്ദി(˵⎚ᴗ⎚ ˵ ) ᢉ𐭩 CURT & ROD

‪♡ “okay, but why though?” — “because it feels weird knowing all of you can just see my ass 24/7, this isn’t a free show.” — “but why can’t it be.” that’s basically their entire mindset.

‪♡ honestly they’re about to crash out, man. they’re willing to draw close (sorry wyndolyn) to make sure the neighbours can’t see, but come on!! why can’t they?? >:( not even one slither of thigh?? not even an arm?? what is this, the victorian days?

‪♡ just to tease you they will not hesitate to list all their favourite outfits of yours: that very specific set of underwear with the cute cats and whatever shirt you find in the clean pile, a cliche but a goodie is some sweatpants that have seen better, oh and did you know your tummy does this cute thing where it turns squishy? and that your chest—what do you mean they’re making it worse? honesty is the best policy.

‪♡ they’re one of the few that will actively comment about it when you walk past, because why wouldn’t they? maybe they still hold a little bit of a vendetta when you tugged too hard on the curtain tassels to draw them closed or because the house is 50x more entertaining when you’re giving everyone brain lag from being too fine—either way; they’re not gonna be stopping any time soon.

BONUS (⁎⁍̴̛ᴗ⁍̴̛⁎)

‪♡ telly hates it. genuinely. you used to sit there so cozily on koa, shorts riding up to reveal those creamy thighs, shirt barely covering your stomach—it was great!! it was the one time he could only focus on you instead of the sound of plates shattering in whatever soap opera you picked to watch.

‪♡ honestly everyone in the bathrooms think it’s funny. seeing you hurriedly shut the door and take the quickest showers or baths of your life is pretty much better than drama. those little slip ups of skin though? now that’s what they live for. plus, it’s quite fun to hear the others complain about how it’s unfair that the rest of the house doesn’t get a chance to see your body so intimately any more—sucks to suck doesn’t it?

‪♡ hank 3 specifically hated this change because your body is nice to look at, why the sudden shift in confidence? ass out, baby!! the others don’t want to pry buuut…when you come into the laundry room they do look at each other very excitedly knowing full well they could very easily hide all those long-sleeves and baggy pants of yours (hey, it would make harper very happy too to keep it for a little longer!)

‪♡ dirk just finds it all hilarious. seeing everyone crash out over not seeing some skin basically all because of him? call it trashy, but he revels in the rage.

‪♡ speaking of trash, cam doesn’t care…because he can make anything filthy and he’s pretty sure you know it too. he kinda adores how annoyed you get when he can make you flustered just by looking at you a bit too sultrily. you think wearing a few too many layers is going to make him forget the curve of your back when you bend over? or the way water and sweat mingle on your skin?

‪♡ mac is gonna create a whole damn word file simply titled “RIP MC’S NUDIST LIFE” to commentate the end of an era. all those days of you taking your shirt off in front of the screen when it gets too hot…watching your fingers flex on the mouse and sometime write pure filth while clearly getting a little heated—that’s worth at least a special digital funeral.

Shelley

She’d actually be so nervous about bringing up sex for the first few months of your relationship, if you want anything to happen you’re going to be the one that initiates.

She’ll get carried away easily, she really doesn’t know her own strength, which will be really apparent when her strap is deep inside of you and your ass feels like it’s bruising up.

Actually prefers to watch you suck on her strap rather than getting eaten out, it gives her such a rush of heat throughout her entire body as she watches you take her strap all the way down. Doesn’t matter if it’s a strap where she can get some friction or not, the noises you’re making and the way you’re looking at her will make her cum.

Doesn’t matter how much you weigh, doesn’t matter how muscular you are, she will be manhandling you. It turns her on so much when you let out a little sound of surprise as she picks you up and throws you over her shoulder, giving your ass a smack, “You’re comin’ with me, hot stuff.”

She wants to see you cum just from her fingers, no matter if you’re AMAB or AFAB, she’s committed to make you a moaning, drooling mess just from her fingering you. Will talk you through it too, saying things like, “look at you, so close already, just from my fingers”, and, “say it, say that you love this, c’mon.”

When she starts to grope your ass or thighs, not letting go as you’re making out that’s when you know the strap is coming out, and she’s going to fuck your brains out ‘till you pass out, she has insane stamina. Loves to make you moan her own name as she’s fucking into you, her hips stuttering as you cum, crying out her name as she feels herself get even wetter if that was possible. After that one lick to her clit, and she’s cumming on the spot, at least let her cum on your tongue so it won’t be that embarrassing for her.

This woman will sit down and as you get on her lap, you just can’t help your hips as you start to hump her thigh. She’s very turned on by this and discovers that watching you hump her thigh and making yourself cum on her thigh is something she’ll have wet dreams about for months. Moan her name and tell her how good she feels, then she’ll combust on the spot, hugging you by your waist, bringing you flush against her chest as she starts to hump against you too. That’s when she starts to be a whiny mess.

She absolutely gets off on your voice when you’re so close to her ear, and you’re breathlessly moaning her name. Your voice gets her so turned on, so much that she can’t stop the way her body shivers when you moan her name as she’s thrusting into you.

Wants to make you scream so bad, wants the whole house to hear just how good she’s ruining you, how good she’s making you hers as her grip on your thighs tightens, and she starts snapping her hips down into you, her strap reaching even deeper into you. Will not stop fucking you until you at least cry out her name loudly.

Gets so rough when she’s fucking you, she just can’t control herself when you look like a mess like that. Her hand won’t leave your throat as she makes you arch your back into her, using said hand on your throat as an anchor while she’s fucking into you like a woman that wants to make you a dumb, drooling mess on her strap (she does).

Smell really gets her too. Especially after either a good shower, bath or an intense workout session, she just loves any smell that stands out, and it feels like you’re wrapped all around her. Her senses clouded by how good you smell, how hot you look as she’s fingering you, her nose always finds its way to your neck as she gets to smell you and leave a bruising hickey that won’t heal for at least three days. 

Look, for aftercare, she’s stiff. She’s inexperienced, although she fucks really good, she needs a few instructions as to what to do and what you need, but she’s excellent at following orders so she makes up for it. She can get a little awkward after sex, just cuddle up to her and she’ll relax.

Skips/xxXShadowlord420Xxx

This freak will most certainly initiate after like two weeks of being together, if not that, he will pounce when you say want to fuck. He becomes insatiable real quick.

Likes role-play, especially if you take it seriously, might stutter when you’re looking at him like you’re going to eat him up, but he’s trying his best to turn you on as much as you do him.

He says a lot of, “you’re mine”, “mine” and, “only mine” as you’re having sex, especially if he’s close to cumming. He’s possessive, he not only lets you know that with his words, but also by how bruising his grip is on your body. He holds you like you’re going to disappear.

Although he adores you, he loves to have sex in the dark. The suspense of you not knowing where he’s going to touch you next, the small noises you make when he peppers kisses on your thighs out of nowhere when you two first had sex, never leaves his mind.

For fan fiction reasons, I’m going to say his shadow form can interact with you physically. With those long and slender fingers, get ready for the best fingering and/or the best hand job of your life. His tongue would also be freakishly long;

For AMAB, he will not suck you off rather his tongue will be wrapped around your cock stroking you non-stop, the tip of his tongue never leaves the tip of your dick, he’s going to milk you ‘till you’re shooting blanks, until you’re crying and whining your name. The way your voice cracks spurs him on more though…

For AFAB, get ready to feel that tongue in places you didn’t even know were reachable before. His tongue just adds to your wetness, the way his tongue thrusts inside you, you’d think this creature was starving for pussy before meeting you.

For his human-ish form, he loves to watch you bounce on his dick from behind as he’s groping your ass and biting down on your shoulder like he’s claiming you in a way.

If you want to make this man cum so hard he forgets his handle and his own name, tie him up, take his dick in your hands, and while you’re sucking on the tip make sure your hands are busy with his balls. He’ll start to actually cry from the sheer pleasure of it all, he’s going to try to stop himself, but it’s just too much, and he can’t stop his hips from thrusting up as he’s cumming down your throat.

His favorite thing to do, especially when you’re having sex in the dark, is to use the shadows as like a second touch. Instead of just his hands and dick, you’re going to feel five pairs of hands all over your body; some playing with your nipples others teasing your sex, and a pair of them opening your mouth up for you to take another shadow in your mouth which feels exactly like Skips’ dick. Same length, thickness, and same in how much it throbs inside your mouth when you moan around it.

This man loves a good edging session. Especially if you’re on the receiving end, if you tell him you're close suddenly all the shadow hands disappear, and he stops his hips; “if you cum right now, I won’t stop until you cum at least 6 times,” it’s up to you whether that’s a threat, a good time or both.

Whichever gender you identify and present yourself as, if you both have makeup on, especially generally ‘edgy’ makeup, he’s not going to stop fucking your mouth ‘till he sees the lipstick prints on his dick. He also won’t stop fucking you until all of that eyeliner and or mascara is running down your face, you look ruined, and he very much gets off on that.

Anyway, his aftercare is nice! He knows the basics like bring water, clean you up, cuddle; although he is very cold, it helps to ground you back to reality after that most likely hours of sex you two had. Peppers kisses all over your body and calls you his gorgeous penumbra.

Dirk/Clarence

As Dirk, cannot hide the freak that he is, he loves you he loves sex, and he wants you, but Clarence has more decorum about the whole thing.

Remember how Scandelabra says that your clothes have been unusually tighter around your nether regions when you and Clarence got together? Yeah, especially after you just masturbated. This man wants all the juices coming out of you, even Tyrell can’t compete with him in this department, that one minute of you getting up to clean yourself up, and you still have some sort of bottoms on? They will be unusually tighter.

Dirk likes it rough and fast, while Clarence enjoys a slow, passionate love making.

Pull on Dirk's hair as roughly as you can, dig your nails into his scalp, and tell how fucking useless he would be if it wasn’t for his dick as you’re riding him. He will moan and start to beg you to ride him harder, fuck yourself on his dick so good, he can only cum if he’s inside you and only you.

Ride Dirk’s face/fuck his mouth and call him an impatient whore when he cums just from the sensation of your sex in his mouth. Make sure your cum is inside his mouth or down his throat, he’ll make sure to make you suck on his tongue as you’re making out to taste yourself from his tongue.

Bite Dirk’s neck as hard as you can, claw at his back when he’s pounding into you, pull on his hair and bite his bottom lip so hard it starts to bleed, he likes it rough.

Now, for Clarence, he still likes it rough but in a slower way. He’ll press down on your shoulders while fucking you from the back still, but now his thrusts will reach deeper, you’ll get to feel so full because he’s going slow, because he’s letting his dick throb inside you as you moan his name; it’s different but still him.

He gets turned on by corny pickup lines now, if you’re awkwardly trying to turn him on romantically, he’s getting you on all fours and making sure you can’t sit properly for a few days. When you just do your best to show your love, it gets his dick so hard that the only way he can ever get it down is by thrusting it down your throat.

Both versions of him love to watch you touch yourself as he strokes his dick. He’ll match your pace with his own strokes, he won’t ever cum before you do, he’ll tell you to suck on the tip then to “open up,” as he thrusts his dick inside to cum and fill you up properly.

Loves a strip tease, the way your clothes—by extension, him—feel against your skin as you take them off slowly feels like heaven. Drags his cock over your inner thighs, teases your hole by grinding his tip on the entrance but not fully putting it in, it’s his way to tease you back.

A good make out session is the number one way to get him as hard as he possibly can get, get on his lap and tease his half hard dick from under his clothes, and you’ll feel pre-cum leak in no time.

Both versions of him are good at aftercare, although his body is on the thinner side his body is impossibly soft and comfortable as he wraps his arms around you, he’ll kiss your eyelids and tells you how much he loves you as he sees you slowly falling asleep. Overall very good, just remind him to bring water.

Curt & Rod

They usually prefer to have sex with you one on one, but they won’t say no to a threesome every now and then, they find each other attractive too! Plus, now there’s the benefit of fucking you so it won’t get awkward.

Curt loves foreplay, how he feels for the rest of your activities is dependent on it. It's not hard to please him either, you can just sit there and look gorgeous, just be sure to whimper his name as he’s sucking on your bottom lip and his hands are already teasing your clothed sex.

He gets off on you being in control, using his dick for your own pleasure as he just takes it. Pull him close by wrapping your arms around his shoulders as he’s already fucking into you, tell him to go faster, deeper or both, and he’ll do so, snapping his down in the way you told him to, whining every time you tighten around him; leaking pre-cum inside you.

Give him a good blowjob, take him all the way down, massage his thighs, stroke him while you’re sucking on the tip, and he’ll give you the best head of your life. He goes slow, his tongue never in a hurry, pressing down hard, sucking deep- as if he’s really trying to taste every bit of you. His eyes will never break contact with yours while he’s going down on you, too, he gets off on your expressions.

His preferred pace when he’s fucking you is slow, deep, and hard. He loves how you throw your head back with a whine of his name as his tip brushes against that sweet spot inside you again and again. When you let him cum inside, and it overflows from your hole, dripping down to the sheets? It turns him on so much that his pace picks up out of nowhere.

Adores the way you moan his name, he gets so horny just from that, even if he wasn’t close before now he’s cumming on the spot with an embarrassed whine. Whether you exploit that or not is your choice.

For Rod, let him take control and he’s got you.

He thrusts deep and fast, loves to watch your ass bounce off of his hips as he’s thrusting inside you so good, you can feel almost every vein of his dick inside, he gets so deep, he’s also really good at finding the spot that makes you cry out his name while arching your back into him.

Loves giving head more than receiving, the way your thighs clamp up when you’re so close, when you’re so spent that your voice becomes hoarse, the way you can’t help but thrust your hips up when his tongue presses down on your tip/clit, then to suck on it, he just loves it all. Gets off on seeing how much he affects you. 

He’ll look at you like you hung the moon and the stars in the sky while he’s pounding into you, so close to bruising your ass with the pace he’s going at while telling you how gorgeous you look all fucked out like that.

Really tuned in to your emotions, if you for some reason cam’T say what makes you uncomfortable, he’ll notice it anyway and shift to a position that’s comfortable for both of you or adjust his pace.

Gets off on watching your facial expressions, whether that’s when he’s deep inside you, when he’s giving you head or you’re just making out, his dick will always leak pre-cum when he sees how wet your lips are, your half lidded eyes and the way you’re looking at him gets him so worked up.

They love to fuck you at the same time. Rod’s chest pressing up on your back as the back of your knee slung over Curt’s shoulder while he’s holding you up from your thighs and Rod is holding you up with his hands groping your ass, both of their cocks in one of your holes. Rod’s peppering kisses on your nape, Curt’s giving you hickeys as they both settle down to a slow but deep pace while they thrust into you at the same time, all of you whimpering and moaning breathlessly as the tight fit makes the friction inside you and the friction of their dicks grinding against each other overstimulating in the best way possible.

They will kiss above you as Rod’s fucking you and Curt’s dick is in your mouth, just to get themselves even deeper inside you and see how it feels to kiss each other when you're so tight around them with your mouth and your hole.

You're sucking off Curt, sucking on his tip and stroking the rest while on your knees on the bed, Curt’s eating you out/stroking you at the same time. After you both cum, Curt will hold your head/jaw gently to guide you as you suck off Curt next.

They definitely get into a competition over who can make you cum the fastest or make you moan the louder.

Curt making out with you, playing with your sex, his fingers never leaving it while Rod’s fucking you from behind.

Rod, holding you by the hips and guiding you as you fuck into Curt—with strap for AFABs— leaving a trail of kisses and nibbling on your earlobe as Curt’s a whining mess below you, “Look, he’s all cute ‘n obedient for you, work those hips and make him cum, and I’ll fuck you just how you want it, baby.”

☆ﾟ°˖*Amir

Amir does his job best, to reflect back your gorgeous visage with gusto and an ongoing stream of praise even though you won’t be able to hear any of it in this lifetime, but that hardly stops him as he always finds himself cooing and muttering how beautiful you are when you grace him with your presence in his many reflections.

So really, it’s both a blessing and a curse for him to be placed by your dresser where he can reflect back the whole view of your bed and your shivering form.

How he aches to have you turn yourself towards him, to let him see and watch how you work your fingers on you. It’s torturous, only being able to hear your quiet gasps, the muffled whining from your pillow or the desperate moaning as you reach your peak.

Oh, how you torture this poor mirror azizam.

Don’t blame him when he starts thinking of various positions you can do to properly show your beauty in all angles.

But what he truly longs for is to be able to see your face clearly, without anything obscuring your beauty so he can see how you would close your eyes tightly and grit your teeth to keep your sounds from spilling out once you climaxed.

Oh how he longs to see it, and hopes that he would be able to be the one to bring out all kinds of faces you can make for your pleasure.

☆ﾟ°˖*Betty

Your bed is the last thing you see and feel, and the first thing you wake up to when your alarm rings or when some stream of sunshine manages to slip past your curtains to rudely wake you up.

Betty always tries to savor that feeling of your body sinking down the mattress or you using and clutching your pillows in your sleep. With your job, you’re always so quick to leave her in the morning and only have so little time to sleep in her after having another overtime.

And imagine her happiness when you have a day off today! Despite the sun already up and Timothy already done with his job of waking you up, you just quietly slip back under the covers and not a minute later until your breathing slows that you’re back in dreamland.

She’s glad you decided to sleep in, you definitely needed it after many sleepless nights in that dreadful job of yours. And she won’t deny that she missed you.

You weren’t exactly immune to wet dreams, a fact that Betty knows with her whole being. So when she feels you grinding yourself on her sheets, well, she missed this too.

It’s really hard for her, being this close to you yet never being able to touch or hold you in the way she wants. She watches you with lidded eyes, wondering just what kind of dream has you this hot and bothered.

Oh she fantasizes so many things, maybe it was a hot coworker of yours, or ohh maybe it's a gorgeous stranger that asked you for directions, hell maybe it's that favorite barista of yours.

“Please…” You mumbled in your sleep. How she wants to help you, to embrace you and whisper sweet nothings in your ear as she works you off.

“Go ahead honey, grind on me.” She whispers to you, watching as your hips go frantic before stilling and a quiet moan following. Then you’re fluttering your eyes and she imagines that you’re actually seeing her, that your silly smile was for her.

But it’s not, she watches you rise and a curse falls from your lips seeing the mess on your pajama pants, then you’re already leaving her to start your day.

☆ﾟ°˖*Celia

The first time it happened was an accident really, the other times though, we’re not.

Really it’s hard to not watch you when she's literally the ceiling for crying out loud. There’s only so much she can do in this state.

With how chaotic the house can get and the growing piles of complaints (most of them being Beverly and her bar or Lux) Celia needed a way to wind down from her duties.

Chairemi’s plays and her dearest Florence is a big help until Chairemi is on her day off and she doesn't want Florence to worry for her.

Watching you hump on your pillow was… quite entertaining. The way your hair clings to your sweaty face or that tantalizing arch of your back when you speed up.

Well, don’t tell Chairemi but she much prefers watching you get yourself off than her plays.

You were a delight. Even when she tries to look away or busy herself with reading another one of Tony’s projects, just a little sound from you has her turning her head to your form.

Enthralled on the way you chase your pleasure and those shivers of yours– there’s no object in this house who wouldn’t watch you.

She may not show or say it but she’s always waiting to watch the next time you’re feeling particularly horny.

☆ﾟ°˖*Curt and Rod

Oh lord…

“Did you see that?”

“Shut your mouth, I’m trying to watch–”

“So am I but you got to admit that was really cute when they–”

“Shhh!”

Not even when they’re watching you fuck yourself, they still wouldn’t shut up.

This is one of their favorite things to watch, more than throwing shades to poor innocent strangers just walking by outside. It’s almost at a tie with throwing shade at each other. And you should be honored (even though you wouldn’t know that until a certain sunglasses arrives).

One of their favorite positions of yours is when you’re on your back and just when you’re about to get your release, the way you throw your head back jussst right has them seeing your blissed out face as you ride out your high.

Damn you really do look cute like this.

And that’s the ONLY time they’re both quiet, greedily watching your chest rise and fall as you bask in pure endorphins.

But there are those moments where they’re both spewing absolute filth while watching you, and if you could only hear the kinds of things they say…

“Look at that.”

“I’m looking.”

“Don’t they look cute riding that pillow?”

“Yeah but I think they look better bent over.”

But most of the time it’s just them arguing.

“Wow they’re close already?”

“Oh so you can talk but I can’t?”

“Yeah cuz I can’t listen to them with your grating voice.”

“Grating?! Now I know that’s a lie–”

“SHHHH!”

☆ﾟ°˖*Dirk

He’s your clothes.

There’s literally nothing else I can say.

He’s the first to know your arousal, the one who can feel your growing wetness in your underwear when you’re busy writing away your very erotic smutty fanfics on Mac. The one who can feel your desperation as you squirm in your seat when the heat is getting too much.

Dirk absolutely revels during your writing session.

The way you cross your thighs together has him reeling, and if he closes his eyes then he can imagine he’s in between it, the feeling as you wrap your thighs around his head, and he can almost practically taste you.

But it never last long when you start stripping him off of you. Depraving him from the main course.

He almost cried when you had to throw him back to Harper.

If there was a ranking on which object has touched you the most: Dirk is winning that one (sorry Stepford).

☆ﾟ°˖*Hector

He didn’t mean to watch you, honest!

But he is a weak HVAC and he cannot stop himself when he’s being lured in by your breathing and groans that are akin to a siren's call.

He already sees you so highly and perfect but watching you has whet an appetite he didn’t knew he had.

Some part of him is aching to help and be of use for you, watching you pleasure yourself is a blessing but oh how he wishes to help you. You don’t even have to say a word, you just need to lay down and beckon him– ever the servant he is for your needs and pleasure, he will do everything he can to make you happy.

But alas, he is not the object that is deserving to be near you let alone touch you. His looks will surely disgust you. :(

After seeing you so exposed and in your most vulnerable has plagued him with such haunting images and thoughts.

And maybeeee he wrote those things into a story, a very detailed story of things he’s only finding out about himself. :3

Oh darling not only are you so perfect and lovely, you even inspired him!

☆ﾟ°˖*Mateo

Another he-didn’t-meant-to-watch! Pt.2

Unlike Hector who can only watch through the vents, Mateo has himself tangled in between your thighs.

Is this heaven? Yes, but he’s so embarrassed and flustered and it only got worse as you started grinding against your blanket (him).

Oh god, it feels good and you feel good so this is alright, right?

He doesn’t know if he can survive this honestly… And he actually doesn't want to survive it.

Because with how soft and warm your thighs are, he doesn’t want to leave or for this moment to end quickly.

He watches, he hears and he can feel you all at the same time. This is too much for him! It's both overstimulating but yet still not enough - and he feels horrible for thinking about how your skin and touch would actually feel on him.

The way you clutch onto him as you’re nearing your peak is almost like you’re pulling on his hair - which he didn’t know he was into.

You pulled your blanket closer to you, exhaustion already pulling you to sleep, aftercare thrown out the window as sleep takes you over.

With your slow breathing and your calming heartbeat is starting to lull Mateo to sleep as well, and his day was exhausting helping and caring for the inanimals, so maybe it’s fine for him to take a rest.

That was the best sleep he had in a while.

☆ﾟ°˖*River

There’s hardly a moment where you aren’t using water in your day-to-day life. Cooking, washing, cleaning and bathing as well. Your literal body is just water. Through it River has gotten to know you so well and quite intimately.

You were off to relax in your bathtub as a reward for surviving another horrible week at work and god you deserved this. The water, warm and filled with scents of lavender and roses from a bathbomb you used, is just the remedy for your aching muscles.

River is more than familiar with your body. She has each slope, curve, and beauty mark of yours memorized, and once you step inside your bathtub she was more than happy to embrace you once more.

Everything was the perfect definition of relaxation, your stress and frustration melting away and instead leaving a heady feeling as you slowly caressed your thighs, inch by inch your hand nearing closer to your nether region.

It’s the first time you’re doing this in your bath but unfortunately your horniness prevails as you slowly work yourself up with each touch.

It’s also the first time for River and a few denizens inside the bathroom to see and hear you pleasure yourself outside the bedroom, they can sometimes hear you but really they only get scraps of information from the others who gotten front row seats, but even then they only had to use their imaginations to paint the picture of you.

And how truly lovely you look as you work up a sweat on your forehead, glistening all the while under the light. Those descriptions the others gave did not do you any justice at all - or maybe it was just the lack of imagination for them, who knows.

Waves of water splashed and spilled but River couldn’t care, too focused on watching you and all the little twitches and shivers you made. Right now it feels like it’s just you and her in your own little bubble. (If you only noticed how the water started to get a little warmer but your head is long gone into that familiar space.)

There’s something so intimate to all of this, her embracing your body and being able to touch and feel you in her liquid state. The way the water surrounds and drips from your body is quite alluring.

When you finally come, River watches the way your release mixes and fades in the water, leaving no traces of your debauchery. Maybe later after seeing Winnifred she’ll have to paint lavenders and roses as a souvenir.

(Bonus, because I love the second bathroom objects)

As you go and start cleaning yourself off with Tyrell, unbeknownst to you there’s a lively chattering in your bathroom happening right now.

“Ohh, didn’t they look so cute!” Bathsheba was only the one so excited and gushing over your little show, the others lost into their own worlds all except for a certain rubber duck.

“That was really pathetic, I mean- coming already when it hasn't even been 10 minutes? Really ducking embarrassing.” Rebel said with a sneer as they floated around inside the bathtub.

“But they were cute, weren’t they Rebbie?” There was silence until a groan and Rebel swishing across the water.

“Ducking… I guess…” That reply seemed to be enough for Bathsheba as she glanced around the room to see the other’s reaction.

“Oh I know I have the exact same blush color to match around here… hmm, did I place it in the plants collection or the food collection…” Barry was off looking all over for that blush, Tyrell and Amir are busy doing their jobs while Jean Loo… Is busy staring into space, red faced and all that.

☆ﾟ°˖*Tyrell

It’s his job to clean and soak up all kinds of liquids you encounter or spilled (except mud), he takes pride and does his job dutifully.

Doesn’t mean he isn’t embarrassed when you go and start rubbing him over your chest, to your stomach and down, down to your sweet thighs.

Look, he is a professional. He has dried you up multiple times, he’s made for thi– OOOKAY NOW YOU’RE DIRECTLY WIPING HIM TO YOUR STAINS, OKAY.

This part of his job is a privilege only he has– unless you decide to use your clothes to wipe down your mess (damn you Dirk, that’s his job).

Even through his embarrassment, he prioritizes you and your comfort, so he has to be extra fluffy and warm when you’re doing your aftercare.

Too bad towel buddy isn’t here - they’re a kitchen towel - if he could, he would shape towel buddy into your favorite animal.

Something for you to smile at after you're done with your ‘activity’.

☆ﾟ°˖*Skips

He’s there, he always is. Just creeping at the crevices between furniture and even under your bed, once the sun’s down he’s free to move room by room, watching and listening to the happenings between objects but that’s not what he wants to see.

Slipping past Dorian’s shadow it seems he’s just right on time, your clothes thrown in a corner and you, the most gorgeous human he has laid his eyes on, just started with your little ‘show’.

He wonders how you’ll react, that your once empty and lonely house is actually filled with so many people, and all of them who are so curious about you.

How would you react after finding out that almost a dozen pairs of eyes are hungrily watching and taking in your naked body, your wanton moans that reverberate in your bedroom or how you leak and stain the covers and blankets of your cum.

It’s unlikely it’ll happen, but that hardly stops anyone from fantasizing about you and what they could do to you, their dear human.

So he watches just like the others, taking it all in as you sped your hand to chase that high, your other hand settling on teasing and pulling your nipples, cheeks red and a bead of sweat trickling down your neck.

He watches and waits with bated breath, you’re getting closer to cumming, just a bit more and– there you go.

Those sharp inhales and gasps you take is music in his ears. The tension in your shoulder drops and you sink back into your mattress, you’re probably feeling quite content now he’s sure.

He stays to watch you after you’re done cleaning up and once you're settled under the cover he’s quietly slipping past back to the shadows of a globe.

Your nightly activities became his respite. And it’s embarrassing but you somehow bring such comfort from your presence alone.

He wonders what you would be like if you met him, would you play along with Shadowlord and his ritual of collecting his armaments back? Would you like his true form – Skips Shadley even when he looks completely different as Shadowlord? He wonders if there’s a possibility for something to bloom between the two of you.

But then he thinks about Benji, and his hurt and loneliness is back crashing in waves.

Besides, it’s silly and stupid about thinking of being able to talk with the human, it’s just wistful fantasy and daydreaming on his and the other object’s part.