#darkestwolf

Parker! Really I think I love this character too much, but he’s such an individual, I personally think it’s hard not to.

So, this episode was so so hilarious to rewatch.

i’m still a little unsure as to why Alan is sleeping on the floor... considering he tends to fly in his sleep, I’m going to say that he rolls out of bed often so the floor seems easier to sleep on.ms easier to sleep on to save the fall.

“Alan, get up!”

“What is it?”

“We need you. Now.”

Thinking there was a rescue to go to and ending up at Lady Penelope’s is just classic. I would so love love love to have seen the other Tracy brothers driving lessons. I have my own theories - like I reckon Gordon’s was a nightmare and John and Virgil would have been very good at the ‘perfect gentleman’ part, and Scott would have been a speed merchant - but if anyone would like to make those potential visions come true (I don’t mind in what form) then go for it!

“Has The Hood redirected a comet towards the Earth? An underground earthwork in the Tokyo subway system? Oh, a fusion reactor about to melt in - I’m guessing here - Belgium?”

“Bigger than all of those things.”

Alan has such an imagination. Although they probably are all based in fact if we’re being honest.

“Driving lessons, are you serious?”

“hOh, yes, Mr hAlan, Sir. hI’ve taught hall the Tracy brother’s to drive, hand your father hand hall ‘is brother’s before ‘im. hAnd ‘is father hand hall... hoh no, wait ha minute, hI’m not quite that hold.”

“Great, Parker. Hey, do you teach Parking? Ha-ha.”

“No lip hat Parker’s Motoring School, hif you please, Mr hAlan, Sir.”

“Nobody drives FAB One hexpect me.”

Prepare to swallow those words, Parker...

And now we get to Parker! His acting is even more superb than I thought it was.. There’s kinda hints towards TOS ‘Lord Parker’s ‘oliday’ in here. Not obvious, and nothing big, but the whole idea of Parker acting like a high born.

“So, where (h)are we (h)off to today, Tracy?”

“I dunno, London?”

“Jolly good. (h)I (h)imagine (h)I’ll be meeting Baron (h)and Baronness ‘(H)igh-Falutin’, hand their cousin, Cecila Von-Posh Face.”

I wonder if Parker has based them on real people Lady Penelope’s met? I reckon he has. By the way, for anyone wondering, I’ve transcribed the h’s in brackets because you can tell Parker is trying not to say them with his high, posh voice.

“Thank you so much, Tracy.”

“Mmm-hmm.Very good, Parker. Beautiful deportment. But if you’re going to be playing me, you may as well go the whole dog. You know, for authenticity’s sake.”

“Yes, M’Lady.”

There’s is nothing that can lessen my love of this particular scene.

“When do we get to do the, you know, real driving?”

Yeah... I reckon Scott was the same.

I love this shot just because it makes it look like Sherbet is about to do the driving! Poor Parker though with his broken arm. That wasn’t one of your best moments, Alan.

“You just broke my h’arm, Mr hAlan, Sir.”

“Sorry!”

Now to introduce Sylvia Anderson’s little cameo character. She plays, drum roll please... Lady Sylvia. Not that much of a difference I know, but she’s very well picked for a voice actor and the character is perfectly well designed to fit in with Lady Penelope. it’s a nice little tribute over all and one that couldn’t have come any sooner, considering life and death.

“By the way, Parker, Lady Sylvia is coming for tea today.”

“You’re great hAunt, Ma’am? Lady Sylvia Creighton-Ward, coming for tea?”

“Yes, Parker. You know that drink we pour out of pots and cups.”

Anyone else get the feeling Parker has a thing for Lady Penelope’s great Aunt?

“hI ‘appen to like hantiques. Lady Sylvia for hexample.”

Oh, yeah, there we go.

“You keep TEA in kitchen?”

“Yes, Aunt Sylvia, where else would it be?”

I completely adore this cross-talk going on about tea and TEA. It made for such a nice twist to the episode.

The next characters we meet are this episodes villains, bad guys, whatever you want to call them’s...

And we’re seeing here some elements similar to TOS ‘Brink of Death’ with the attempted robbery at Lady Penelope’s Stately ‘ome (and the car looping around the well element, but we’ll get to that). Terry, the blonde with the top hat. And Bill, the red-head with the beanie.

“Young geezer” - I wonder how Alan would feel about that name...

“So, where’s the treasure?”

“What treasure?”

“Don’t call it treasure! We’re not pirates.”

“Well what would you call it?”

“Well... er... valuable um... stuff.”

“Oh, that sounds rubbish! Where’s the ‘valuable stuff’? You see? Not frightening.”

“It is if you say it frighteningly. Where’s the valuable stuff?”

“They don’t look frightened.”

Of course they don’t mate, they’re both super spies and way more bad-ass than you could ever hope to be...

“What about just valuables? Forget the stuff?”

“Suppose.”

“Where are your valuables?”

“Still think treasure sounds better.”

Considering they managed to get you sat down and debating that... yeah, super bad-ass.

Lady Penelope trying to put them off the scent and Lady Sylvia messing up all of those attempts was absolutely classic comedy.

“Treasure!”

“Valuables!”

“Either way, something that’s worth a lot of money!”

And money makes the world go round!

“He’s the fourth richest man in Europe.”

Hmm... nice to know just how much money this family is sitting on.

“Bill, are you thinking what I’m thinking?”

“I hope not, Terry, because you are stupider than a bag of rocks.”

Let’s leave that argument there shall we.

“Oh this is a dumb idea, ‘Mr Clever-than-a-bag-of-rocks’ man.”

Yeah... or not.

“No hone steals FAB One.”

“Now you’ll realise, you burglar chappies that you’ve met your- match.”

Yeah, you should have been prepared to have to eat those words again.

Now this is how to do afternoon tea.

And this is so how to do an awesome car chase. It had a little bit of everything: stalling; circling; bumper-crashing; cut-offs; wheel spins; running out of petrol; getting stuck on a roof; a bit of bog standard jet-powered engine flight, and just your every day flight and TEA. You know, just the bog standard Italian Job style affair.

Yeah, yeah just your usual car chase, nothing to see here.

I love that Alan gets to drive FAB One and Scott seems so upset by this! I’m guessing maybe he’s now been made the second best driver of the Tracy brothers?

“Wow! Even I never got to drive FAB One.”

I thought The Mechanic had been a little bit too quiet since ‘Up from the Depths’ (really it’s been five episodes without our new main villain).

Oh, and this one, really is photo heavy. I have no apologies.

Parker kicking a door in? Yes, I will accept that start to the episode!

Another ominous location though, I see. Sherbet tagging along behind though is quite sweet.

“Mind your step Parker. Dead end, indeed!”

“Someone’s been digging.”

Someone had been... The Mechanic, by any chance? I think so.

“What is it, Sherbet? Is something down there?”

“Not something. Someone! That’s Morse Code for SOS.”

Good thing someone knows what that means! And there’s someone trapped! I‘m going to say wasn’t part of the plan, because I doubt The Mechanic really wanted IR called to the scene of his grand plan.

Nice shot of the Island.

“We were looking through buildings once linked to The Hood when we came across this.”

That was good thinking by Lady Penelope and Parker though. See this is why you have a London Agent to do some ‘agenting’ (Gordon, ‘Ring of Fire’).

“I’m not waiting. Parker, bring the car around.”

And there we go, she’s always a step ahead of the rest.

“Destruction on this scale could only be The Mechanic.”

“But where’s he going?”

And this was a pretty cool gear up, you have to admit.

This is Hoarse, appropriately named, as he will talk himself hoarse. He’s a plumber as well.

“That’s why they call me Hoarse. Cause I can talk myself Hoarse, you know.”

“Can’t complain. Got me holiday’s coming up. Have you ever been to Spain? What am I kidding, you boys have probably been everywhere...”

“This one’s a talker.”

Yeah, I’m just gonna’ leave it there.

“We need to track where The Mechanic is going, and that means getting through this debris.”

“FAB.”

Yes, did someone call for a removals service? Virgil is brilliant at shifting things, demolition is one of his areas of expertise as we all know. And Scott only reminded us last episode that we could leave the “heavy lifting” to Virgil.

The soundtrack for this episode was pretty on point from the off as well.

“He’s still talking.”

“Whatever keeps him occupied.”

You’ll thank him for it later, Gordon.

“John are you still locked in on my signal?”

“Yes. And based on your current heading, I’m calculating your path now. This isn’t good. Lady Penelope, you’re heading straight for Parkmoor Scrubs Prison.”

“Parkmoor Scrubs? That’s where they’re holding The Hood. This is a prison break.”

Really? The title wasn’t giving the possibility of that away to anyone? Anyone other than lonely little me here?

So remember in ‘City Under the Sea’, The Mechanic was searching the Creighton-Ward building for a safe containing plans for a prison, and Parker stopped him? Yeah, well unfortunately this guy is clearly too smart, because he’s managed it anyway.

“But breaking The Hood out of Parkmoor Scrubs Prison is impossible!”

Are you sure you want to say that?

“But Colonel, we know The Mechanic has already made one attempt at the designs for the place. Maybe he found something.”

You can bet that he did - he can rival Brains after all.

John’s smart thinking comes a little bit too late. If only they’d searched for that signal again after ‘Earthbreaker’.

“It’s coming from his eye.”

“If he’s had that the whole time he’s been in there-”

Which he kinda must have, just saying.

“-This escape could have been planned from the start!”

Now you’re getting it! He did warn us in ‘Legacy’ and ‘Earthbreaker’ that something worse than him could come along, and that we hadn’t seen the end of him.

“It’s like one big, giant game of pick up sticks.”

“Except this is no game. A man’s life is at stake.”

Not having fun there, then I’m guessing.

“Orange! Don’t cut that one.”

Come on... click, click, click-

“Hoarse, what kind of pipes are near you?”

Well done, Virgil.

“I was working on a green and white striped one.”

A bit easier than pick up sticks now, ey, Gordon?

“Should I be worried? Cause I’m worried.”

I quite like the character of Hoarse. It’s a shame we don’t get to see him again. I think that would have been quite fun. Maybe he could have been a friend for Ned?

“’e can’t ‘ave vanished hinto thin hair. Where did ‘e go?”

You’ll be sorry you asked that, Parker.

“They seem to be in a bit of a rush. I don’t think they’re going to stop for you, or us, or anyone.”

Yes, this is a prison break, remember!

“Well, you made quite an entrance. But you are two weeks late.”

“You’re welcome.”

Yes, I agree, very ungrateful.

“International Rescue is here! Did you send out invitations?”

“They’re not a problem.”

“They are to me.”

Well that says more about you, Hood. I think this really is the first moment where we get to see that maybe The Mechanic isn’t quite as into this as The Hood. They’re actually quite at odds with each other once you put them together, and for me this little interaction definitely foreshadowed that things weren’t going to work with these two. They’re not the super villain duet that they were potentially made out to be in ‘Earthbreaker’ and I think that actually was a really well-written move, and maybe not one which would have been expected by the masses.

Villains can be tricky things to write - there’s always a fine line as to whether people find them and their actions believable or not. See, I never found these two more believable than when they were at odds with each other. I know many of us have expressed disappointment at the eventual motivation for The Hood’s villainy (in TAG anyway), but The Mechanic actually had some kind of exploration going on (even though I would have loved a little more backstory, at least his motivations made perfect sense). The Chaos Crew were another pair of Villains in TAG that I struggle with (I mean, we’re not quite there yet, so I’m not going to go into my reasons until we reach that point - which will be soon) and who didn’t really aid in The Hood’s character development as much as I think the writers thought they might.

They did a good job with The Hood in series 1 (and I know they were trying to both adapt and sustain elements from TOS with him), but I think TAG’s best villain by far is The Mechanic (and not because he was made up, nor because he has a redemption arc), or he’s at least, their best written villain. Once again, this is a conversation that could go on for a while, so I’m actually going to pull it into one big post on villains - might be a wait for it thought as I’m waiting to find a free pocket of time.

See that! A little talking never hurt anyone.

“Green and white. My favourite colours.”

Yes I can see how that is true for Virgil. Gordon might have preferred yellow, but you can’t always get what you want.

“Gordon, step on it.”

“I stepped on a bug once, big as your hand, honest...”

“Why are we stopping? Go out the way you came in.”

“I wouldn’t advise that.”

“I don’t want your advice. i want your absolute obedience.”

Asking a lot, isn’t it?

“I’ve done everything you’ve asked me too.”

“Your machines are impressive; your results are pathetic. The only thing you’ve ever done for me is fail.”

I wouldn’t say that’s quite true...

“Now follow my command.”

I think the clues were finally all there with this interaction - the cybernetic eye is going and suddenly The Mechanic moves to do as The Hood says, despite the only thing they’ve done since they reunited in person be to argue? Yeah, that’s not a believable response, unless you are being controlled or have something held over you. If there was any doubt before, I don’t think there is now to the state of play between these two.

“You had to know they’d be waiting for us.”

“Well obviously. I may be free, but we had to give them some sort of consolation prize.”

And there we have it, the big reveal, doubt eradicated.

“The Hood and The Mechanic must not get away!”

Uhh... they both got away!

“It looks like The Hood and The Mechanic both got away.”

Yep, I’ve already said that.

“So now we have two master criminals on the loose?”

Keep up, Gordon, we’ve already said that - twice in this case.

“I have a feeling it’s about to get very busy for all of us.”

“And we’ll be ready for them.”

“I’m actually speechless.”

Well, by the very fact you’ve just spoken Hoarse, you’re technically not, but okay.

“I mean look at me, I’ve got nothing. I’ve got nothing to say at all. Ask me something now, I couldn’t tell you...”

And I think that was probably a good place indeed to put the credits. Otherwise, this could have been a bumper sized episode just for stories from Hoarse - imagine that!

This was an amusing shot though. Let’s all hide behind the pink car whilst we wait to apprehend the “master criminals”.

Also, as a little bonus, there’s plenty of behind the scenes pictures available for this episode.