Quinlan: Well...you were dead.

Something along the lines of like, I don't need x I just want to be with you. Or spend my life with you? Ugh I can't remember. But that line BROKE me the first time I read it.

thought from the cover it was going to be a Ventress + Quinlan buddy adventure, fully my bad, I should have read the plot blurb.

I don't think Jedi in general are celibate, I think they just let Quinlan specifically believe he had to be celibate because they like him better when he's repressed. he literally got one kiss and said he wanted to leave the order I'm not joking. I don't mean this as a plot hole I think Quinlan is just Like That.

again I'm only partway through, but I'm wondering if Obi-Wan is going to have to keep 2 Jedi's relationships secret after the end of this, which is fucking hilarious knowing he was so close to leaving the order himself.

I was really surprised by Asajj's characterization in this. I really like her in the show, but this book kind of recontextualizes her appearances in the show to have sexual undertones that I was NOT picking up on. It's not necessarily a bad characterization, there's a bit of commentory in there on Ventress being brought up in patriarchy unlike her sisters (but you really have to look for it imo) I just wish there were still some Nightsisters around who were actually brought up in the matriarchy so we could see their differences, since their brief show appearances didn't lend them much characterization. I really need to get around to playing the RPGs because I hear there's a Nightsister character there and I'm very curious about her! anyways this one derailed ummmmm yeah the book gives Ventress alot of depth but also kind of emphasizes her sexuality more than i would have liked for this particular character.

that being said, part of that characterization comes from male characters talking about her when she isn't there and even before her pov is introduced (we get multiple POVs outside the protags) and I really thought this book was going to lean into a male entitlement kind of perspective, of like "she knows exactly what she's doing and I'm a manly man who understands her like no other man" because in the beginning there was definitely some of that going on, like the jedi men definitely presume to know alot about Ventress's inner thoughts in a way I felt was kind of project-y, and Quinlan's descriptions in the beginning are all about how he can handle Ventress's challenging personality because he's not just a jedi, but a Super Special and Different jedi (I learned through this book that Mary Sues specifically bother me when they're male romance protags jesus christt) but pretty soon that goes away.

also I'm pretty sure Obi-Wan accidentally implied that Ventress was homophobic. I don't think she is tho.

anywayysss right now I'm up to the part of the book where Quinlan is unlearning his jedi programming and it's pretty dang good! but also is making me realize that Ventress is Not a good partner in this case omfg. like there are worse ppl who could have gotten ahold of that man *cough*palpatine*cough* but there are definitely. better ones as well. in the first part of the book both characters are super reserved and hiding stuff or whatever but now it's like. Boundaries are nonexistent. Ventress has a veryyyyy specific idea of what it takes to complete their mission and as far as she's concerned Quinlan has No Other Choice unless he wants to call it quits. and given the training regimen she decided on I don't think it's advisable for them to be romantically involved at tthis time. but hey, it makes for an entertaining book! also I'm not that-that familiar with the romance genre but I'm pretty sure some of this counts as dubcon??????

in other news: we get some non-sexual choking in this section! no, I'm not giving context.

also: this book is apparently based on unaired episode concepts from TCW! I think parts of it were reworked bc there are scenes that I don't think would fly on Disney Channel (posing an unconsious man to look like he was jerking off) but I wonder how much of the original concept was changed. Like, was there always supposed to be a romance arc? and knowing this was probably supposed to be one arc aka 3 15-minute episodes definitely highlights how much plot TCW was fitting into these arcs bc Holy Shitttt. and was there always supposed to be a romance arc here? maybe as like. a foil to Anakin or something, because Quinlan would leave the jedi and still be a good guy or smtg??

the library was kind enough to put a "sci-fi" genre sticker on the spine of the book. just in case you've never heard of Star Wars.

I'm kind of dreading the ending bc I know they have to fail at their mission for the story to work in canon :(

The book offhandedly mentions that after her jedi master died, Ventress like, took over a city???? and I think that got retconned because there's an animated scene where Dooku straight up finds her finding the dead body.

I think this is supposed to be gendered trope subversion because Quinlan's the one who literally goes undercover to flirt w Ventress. cool.