#dadtony

(This is on text)

Y/N: Hi dad, I heard mom got stung by a bee, is she okay?!

Tony: She's fine sweetie, she just had to take the deep penis.

Y/N: The... What?

Tony: I had to inject her with an EPIC PENIS

Y/N: Omg dad, I don't need to know about your sex life with mom ;C

Tony: Oh for god's sake...

Peter ParkerxReader

Dad!Tony

Word count: 1,170

Request by @katiemcrae: Part 2 of Happy Birthday, Dad! But it is the reader's birthday instead.

A/N: This probably isn’t exactly what you were asking for but I felt so bad having put this off since you asked for it back in May. My most sincere apologies, I hope you can forgive me. Format is weird bc I'm posting from mobile. I will fix it if I ever get the chance to turn my laptop on again since I'm so busy...

You were half way through your day and frankly, it was the worst day ever. You couldn’t believe this, not a single person remembered that it was your birthday.

And you weren’t the kind of person to say something about it either. So, you waited and waited.

Not even your dad wished you a happy birthday while he was rushing out that morning, saying he was late for a meeting.

Then worst of all Peter wasn’t answering any of your texts. You hoped he was alright. You knew you would know if it wasn’t but it probably just meant he was busy.

It was just peaking 8 o’clock by the time Peter showed up at the tower and you were beyond upset by now.

“Hey baby,” he greeted entering your room.

You barely cast him a glance.

“You okay?” He asked, sitting down on your bed beside you.

“Fine,” you stated.

Now, Peter knew exactly what was wrong. He didn’t really like your dad's idea of pretending to forget what today was, but that was Tony's plan, so he had to go with it. “You’re lying,” Peter stated. “We’ve been together long enough that I know. So what’s up?”

You rolled your eyes, refusing to tell him the truth.

“Okay well then let me take you out on a nice date, so maybe I can cheer you up?” He suggested.

“Nope, I’m fine staying right here tonight. Like I’ve been all day since no one seemed to care.”

“Baby I’m sorry I wasn’t around today but you know how I get caught up in stuff… and I know your dad was in meetings all day so let me make it up to you.”

You knew he would continue to pester you, so you decided to give into him. You changed into something more acceptable and the two of you were off.

Peter brought you to your favorite restaurant. Only as you approached it looked closed.

“Guess they aren’t open tonight,” you offered. “Guess we’ll have to go home.”

“Maybe they’re just trying something new with the lights,” Peter suggested quickly as you started to turn around. He went and opened the door for you. “See? Open, come on.”

With such a quick response you eyed him skeptically. However, you went into the place anyway. The lights were all out but suddenly they all came on there were loud shouts of “happy birthday”.

You jumped some, only slightly surprised. You had a feeling this is what was going to happen. But frankly, you were more pissed off than anything.

Your dad was front and center. The huge smile on his face quickly dispersed seeing you scowl.

With a shake of your head you turned and walked right out of the restaurant.

Peter quickly followed you. “Baby-?”

“Don’t Peter,” you snapped.

Tony stepped out the door next. “What’s going on?”

“You guys!” You said, a bit too loud, people passing on the streets were staring, making you completely uncomfortable. You pinched the bridge of your nose. “I would have loved this, if it wasn’t for the fact that the majority of my birthday was spent alone with everyone pretending to forget it was my birthday! I couldn’t even get a text of acknowledgement! How is that fair at all?! This doesn’t make up for that!"

Peter rubbed the back of his neck and Tony sighed.

“We knew you’d suspect we were up to something if we said anything about it.” Your father stated.

“You know how bad I am at lying, you can read me like a book,” Peter offered. “I’m sorry for making you think I didn’t remember your birthday.” He reached out to take your hand but you snapped it away from him.

“Apologies don’t make up for it either, Peter.” You told him.

“I promise I’ll make it up to you…”

“You better. And Dad?”

“Well of course I’ll make it up to you sunshine. Sorry I wasn’t thinking about how it might make you feel… that wasn’t right. Let's get back in there though I’m sure you’re hungry.”

You nodded and went back into the restaurant. Your two guys following behind you.

At least your dad knew how to throw a party. And Peter definitely made it up to you that night.

You were cuddled up in your bed beside Peter. Your head tucked under his chin.

It was well past midnight, your party was so much fun. You spent a lot of it with your dad by your side. Dancing and laughing. It's been a while since you could all let go like that. And as tired as you were you just wanted to relish in the quiet time with your boyfriend. It was rare that the two of you could have a night together like this.

Peters hand stroked slowly through your hair, his fingers toying with strands. He seemed so calm, but something was off.

With your head on his chest you could hear his rapid heartbeat.

You shifted and looked up at him in the dark. “You okay, baby?”

His eyes widened like he hadn’t realized you were awake. “Y-yeah, yeah I’m good why?”

You tapped his chest. “I feel like your hearts gonna burst under my head.”

He was glad the room was only lit softly by the lights from the city below, or you’d see the blush take over his face. He stared at you for a moment. “Um well uh you just, you make my heart go crazy.”

You snorted at him and pat his chest. “Good one, Parker. Seriously though, everything okay?”

Peter sighed he knew he wouldn’t be able to lie to you for long. You would just keep pestering him. He was silent for a moment before sitting up and taking you with him. He scooted out of the bed and went over to his pants.

You watched him quietly as he went, curious about what he was doing.

He came back, fumbling with something behind his back. “I-... I wasn’t planning to do this tonight. May says it’s bad luck on holidays and stuff so I figured your birthday would be a bad time too. And you were having such a good time anyway. And then I started thinking about when I could. And we were getting some time alone together and I started working myself up and how badly I don’t want to mess it up by rambling which is exactly what I’m doing and-”

He dropped down on his knee beside your bed. “Will you marry me?”

Your eyes widened as he brought a beautiful ring up and the world tumbled out of his mouth. Tears sprung from your eyes as you sat up. You nodded and pulled him back up into your bed. You placed a very smiley kiss on his lips. “Yes, Peter yes.”

He smiled and let out a very small happy chuckle. You could tell he was holding back his excitement as his shaky fingers slid the ring on your finger.

Peter: its snowing Mr Stark!...it would be wrong to not play in it..

Tony: No No No No

*Peter huffs and sits on the ground looking sad*

Tony *sighs*: What are you doing?

Peter: Making you feel guilty

Tony: That's not gonna work kiddo..

Tony:...

Peter: *puppy sounds*

Tony*sighs*:You little piece of shit!

Tony pov

Uncomfortable was a understatement tony was sitting in the shitty apartment of His young intern with the hot aunt. his husband next him just as uncomfortable. as he is

"may its just for a little while two weeks at most "I DON'T CARE STARK you are not using my nephew as you test subject" S thats not it may after. Thanos and soul stone thing peter bonded with us we just want to spend some time with :M I SAID NO STAR SPANGLED ASS HOLE.

T(she push us our of the door slamming it loud as possible )that bitch is keeping us away from Our KID keeping him in this rat infested dump when they could be living in the lap of luxury but no

steve Babe calm do

Tony our baby is living in this hell hole steven we cant let underoos stay in this dump. We have to do something its for hus own good

Dad!TonyxReader

Word Count: 1,192

Request from anon: hey could you do a dad!rdj x reader, where he catches her smoking weed? thanks!

A/N: Sorry if this isn’t good. I didn’t really know what to do with it... I hope you enjoy it though anon!

-No picture-

Loki is alive!

Think abt it. If Loki takes the tesseract and escaped due to the botched mission of antman and Tony stark, His future changes.

The events of infinity war becomes null and void because of what past thanos does. He goes to the future from a time way before he even killed Loki. Seeing that he dies there, Loki should still be alive right??

Time travel conundrum

But then again, due to all the time level shit the avengers did, infinity war should have never occurred since past thanos is dead and he never gets the infinity stones in the first place.

So either the time travel conundrum is being ignored or that the reality the survivors are living in is a reality where infinity war happened and theres is another reality where it didnt.