#dad!shotaro

Renjun laughs, ‘they won’t be very tall though.’

Renjun laughs, ‘they won’t be very tall though.’

Renjun laughs, ‘they won’t be very tall though.’

’Still absolutely beautiful.’

Suddenly, Jinghua splutters and begins to cry. When your oldest, Tengfei did this for the first time, you remember the way that Renjun panicked and froze up, not knowing what to do. But now, he handles his third child with ease, a concerned pout spreading across his face as he reached for a bottle.

‘It’s okay, my sweet girl, daddy’s got the food,’ he speaks in a hushed tone, guiding the nipple of the bottle to her mouth, ‘there. That’s better, isn’t it sweetheart?’

Renjun wanders towards the window, where the hospital’s communal garden can be seen.

You can no longer see her, but you can hear Jinghua gulping down milk. Renjun begins to murmur words that you cannot hear.

‘You’re my most perfect girl…’ Jinghua just watches him, eyes still glassy with tears.

‘You have two older brothers who are just itching to meet you. They’re going to take such good care of you. I’m going to take such good care of you. You don’t have to worry now…’

jeno

You felt warm. Warm underneath the blankets, warm in your heart. It’s nearly pitch black in your bedroom, apart from the soft orange glow from the multitude of candles dotted around the room. Fresh tears roll down your cheeks, your brand new slightly pink baby girl’s face peeking out from her own lilac fluffy blanket on your bare chest. You’re still laying in the same place that you gave birth to her, while Jeno is curled up next to you, head on your shoulder. It’s a type of staring contest you don’t think you’ve ever had, the way you’re examining each others faces.

’She is so so beautiful,’ Jeno whispers, not wanting to shatter the peace that you’re in.

‘I can’t believe it myself,’ you remark, ‘and I pushed her out.’

‘You were incredible,’ Jeno’s hand finds his way to your hair, still matted with sweat and water that leaked down from the wet flannel that had been on your forehead.

With every passing second you notice something new about her face, a new noise that comes from her tiny mouth or a different coloured hair on her head.

’I can’t believe she is all ours,’ you stroke her black head of hair, ‘our little Moonie.’

‘Gorgeous, with a full head of hair,’ Jeno adds, ‘she’s so perfect. But then again, you gave birth to her.’

‘You helped make her,’ you point out, ‘she has your face. Your nose and your mouth.’

When Jeno shifts slightly closer to you, Moonbyeol’s gaze moves from you to him. Her mouth is slightly open, so much that you can see her little tongue as she gurgles and makes baby noises.

‘Hello Moonbyeol,’ Jeno says, softly than you’ve ever heard him speak before, ‘it’s very lovely to finally meet you. Aren’t you beautiful? It’s so strange, I only just met you but I love you so so so much. I promise I will love and protect you forever.’

haechan

‘I love the baby smell so much,’ Donghyuck admits as he sniffs Kyungah’s head as she lays in his arms.

’Stop sniffing her like that,’ you grumble, ‘you’ll disturb her.’

‘It’s not like she’s asleep,’ Donghyuck rolls his eyes playfully, ‘she’s awake. Looking at me with those big beautiful brown eyes. God, I’m never going to be able to say no to her.’

‘You can hardly say no to the child we already have.’

‘He is just incredibly persuasive. She is just cute,’ Donghyuck brings her head to his nose again, ‘with a smell that I’ve really missed.’

‘Our daughter isn’t a candle,’ you giggle, ‘I know she smells nice, but you have years to soak in the baby smell. Let her be still, she has the right to be tired.’

‘Fine,’ he jokingly huffs, sinking down into the armchair next to your bed, ’she can lay on my chest and sleep and I can soak in the baby smell and she’ll have no idea.’

Despite saying this, Kyungah is more laying in his arms than on his chest. His eyes are still fixated on her face.

’We make some gorgeous babies,’ Donghyuck muses.

‘They’re both the spitting image of you,’ you say, ‘Dalgun is your double and she… she has your nose and your lips.’

‘With your eyes,’ Donghyuck grins, looking up at you finally with the smile you love so much, ‘you wanna make another?’

‘Fat chance,’ you splutter, ‘I’m still in pain.’

‘I can’t believe I saw you do all of that again. It’s so surreal that you’ve done that twice now.’

Kyungah has fallen asleep at this point, soft snores coming from her. You yawn at this point, your mind filled with thoughts of sleep.

‘You need to go to bed too,’ Donghyuck stares sternly, ‘you’ve had a long day.’

‘So have you,’ you point out, ‘come cuddle me to sleep, please.’

Donghyuck yawns too, using a spare hand to brush back his hair.

‘Yeah, you’re right.’

Two minutes later Kyungah is in her hospital crib, still fast asleep, and Donghyuck is laying next to you.

’Goodnight Hyuck,’ you murmur, ‘I love you.’

‘Goodnight baby. I love you so much.’

jaemin

‘You like the song?’ Jaemin coos, the acoustic music quietly playing as he tries to rock Chaeyeon to sleep.

It’s completely silent in the birthing centre. You feel almost in a cocoon of warmth with the multi-coloured glow of the bubble tube being the only light. Jaemin’s phone is connected to a bluetooth speaker, playing gentle music.

‘Look, it’s the moon,’ he smiles, using a free hand to point out the blinding full-moon in the sky, ‘it seems like they knew you were coming tonight, huh? The moon is perfectly between the earth and the sun. That’s why it looks so bright.’

‘Giving her a science lesson, are we?’

Jaemin jumps a bit at the sound of your voice, ‘I didn’t realise you were awake.’

‘My stomach hurts,’ you smile weakly, ‘and I woke up to you going on about the position of the sun and earth.’

‘I’m just starting her early! When our Chaeyeon becomes an astronaut or an astrophysicist one day then it’ll be because of me!’

‘Whatever,’ you laugh, shifting around in your bed to get more comfortable.

‘I was just up because she was crying,’ Jaemin explains, ‘but she stopped when I held her, and she wouldn’t let me put her back down again.’

‘Oh,’ you whine, still stretching, ‘wake me up if she needs anything else.’

Within the minute you’re back asleep, much to Jaemin’s relief. You seemed so peaceful, as well as the fact that you weren’t just in constant pain.

‘You could go to sleep too,’ Jaemin whispers at the baby in his arms, ‘you’d be a lot less bored.’

Chaeyeon is just examining his face, eyes darting around between his mouth to his forehead.

’But I suppose, everything is so new and interesting to you. You have plenty of time to explore the world though. Here’s a fun fact about the world- when it’s dark outside and you can see the moon, that means it’s time to sleep. You close your eyes- like this, and you dream all about lots of different things.’

Chaeyeon’s eyes are heavy, although she is refusing to close them.

‘It’s okay to sleep,’ Jaemin murmurs, still gently rocking her, ‘the world will be here when you wake up.’

Not long later, Chaeyeon is sound asleep.

‘Goodnight my angel,’ Jaemin whispers while he lowers her into the crib, ‘I love you.’

yangyang

‘She is unbelievable,’ Yangyang has your newborn daughter in his arms, while you watch him from your hospital bed.

You lay there, warm drink in hand, fighting the urge to close your eyes. You’re exhausted and in pain. Yangyang was finally having his first hold after your skin to skin time.

‘You were unbelievable,’ he adds, ‘that was so surreal, I can’t believe you did all of that.’

‘It was nothing,’ you shrug, ‘it’s what I am made to do.’

‘It’s still amazing,’ Yangyang retorts, eyes never leaving the face of your daughter.

You’re so tired, erratically fading in and out of sleep.

‘If you need to go to sleep, you can,’ Yangyang’s tone calms all the way down, so that he is nearly whispering.

‘I couldnt,’ you shake your head, ‘too overwhelmed. I don’t think I can take my eyes away from her.’

‘I’ve got her,’ he reassures you, shifting her around in his arms a bit so you can see how secure his hold on her is, ‘don’t worry, lovely, if there’s a problem I’ll wake you up.’

Yangyang uses a spare hand to push hair from your face, before taking the drink from your hand and placing it on the table beside you.

‘I know you want to,’ he sings, and your eyes flutter shut.

‘Finally,’ Yangyang sighs, ‘your mummy/mommy getting the rest she deserves.’

The baby girl in his arms kind of feels like an alien to him, an unknown being but still something undeniably a part of him.

‘You’re so pretty Julia. I cannot believe you’re mine. How is it that you’re half me? You can’t be, you’re 100% your mother. Beautiful.’

Julia gurgles, while Yangyang continues to speak to her.

‘You have many- and I mean many uncles who are excited to meet you. There’s sort of… a humongus family waiting for you. And I hope that you know how much we all love you…’

shotaro

‘Oh dear, oh dear, oh no,’ Shotaro holds the coughing Saori in his arms, standing at the window of your city apartment.

Shotaro woke up to the sound of Saori crying. You hadn’t woken up, probably still passed out due to the exhaustion of having just given birth a few hours previously.

‘You can’t cry that much sweetheart, because then you’ll cough like that.’

The bright lights from all of the billboards and the cars below are the only source of light in the nursery where they’re stood.

Shotaro continues to bounce Saori in his arms, tapping her back to help her stop coughing and just breathe.

‘Good girl, just breathe.’

Saori lets out a few weak cries before reducing it down to regular gurgles.

Shotaro moves Saori to that she is laying against his shoulder, looking behind him.

’This is the first time we’ve really been alone together huh?’

The distant sound of car horns kept Saori awake as Shotaro just drank in the sight of his newborn’s face with the red and white lights reflecting on her face.

’Are the cars keeping you awake?’ He asks, as if she could answer, ‘who knows where they’re all going at this time. Let’s close these blinds, maybe it’ll be a bit quieter.’

It’s now nearly pitch black in the nursery, Saori’s cries winding down a bit.

‘Oh I see,’ Shotaro whispers, ‘the light was too much. We’ll keep it off from now on.’

Saori begins to drop off, but every time she comes close to it her eyes snap back open.

‘Are you being this stubborn on purpose?’ He grumbles, ‘sleep is nice, you know. I like sleep. When you’re an adult you’ll appreciate a good nights sleep. But you’re just little. Maybe if we put you back in bed, you’ll be able to sleep.’

Shotaro begins to lower Saori back into her crib. But the second her head makes contact with the pillow she erupts in tears again.

‘Oh I’m so sorry,’ Shotaro’s eyebrows furrow, ‘how about you come sleep with mummy/mommy and daddy, just for tonight?’

Saori isn’t crying anymore, but gurgles, which Shotaro takes as an affirmative.