#dad!jaemin

Your eyes widen a little, ‘oh, of course not, I’m sorry.’

Mark chuckles, ‘it’s okay, it’s important he gets to know his mama. I’ll keep an eye on him while you nap, okay? I’ll wake you if he needs anything.’

‘Okay,’ you sit up slightly. The handover is awkward, it being the first time you’d done it, but eventually Mark has the tiny baby in his arms, kissing your forehead before murmuring a ‘goodnight, I love you,’ and settling into the armchair beside your bed.

‘Love you. Please keep him here,’ you mumble, turning onto your side and closing your eyes.

‘I will, don’t worry sweetheart.’

Mark is quiet for a few minutes, gently yet stiffly rocking the baby back and forth, examining his face and all the details. The baby looked so much like him, and he knew it, feeling an enormous sense of pride at the boy’s identical nose and eyes, that he’d seen in baby photos of his own over the years. Once he’s sure you’re asleep, he begins to talk to his son, wishing the infant to get used to his voice.

‘Hey, baby boy,’ Mark begins, lightly shushing the baby when he fusses, ‘it’s okay, everything is just fine.’

You were just on the verge of falling asleep when you hear Mark’s voice, heart warming at the sound of the love of your life talking to your firstborn.

‘I didn’t even know you existed a few hours ago, but God, I love you. More than anything. You’re so perfect, such a beautiful baby, all from your mama. She did so well, didn’t she? Carried you for all that time… I promise I’ll be here for you, always. Everything I do from now on is for you and your mummy/mommy.’

You still lay awake, eyes filled with hot tears at the pure love that overcomes you. 

Mark is silent for a few moments, staring back into his son’s deep brown eyes, ‘I promise I won’t let you down. I love you, son.’

renjun

This was the moment Renjun had been anticipating since the moment you found out you were pregnant. He’d been terrified at the time, the pregnancy was unexpected and Renjun wasn’t sure he was ready or capable of being a father. At the same time, Renjun’s thoughts were filled with questions and worries about your baby. What would the baby look like? How big would the baby be? Would they come during the day or the night? But his biggest fear of all, was that your baby wouldn’t like him. He didn’t have the best luck with other member’s babies; generally they would cry and protest in his arms. He tried to prevent this, doing any and every bonding exercise with your bump that he could think or read about, hoping that when your son arrived he would feel comfortable and safe with him.

‘Jun?’ You’d been holding the baby for over an hour, having some skin to skin and your first feed. Renjun froze a little at the expectant look on your face, like he knew what you were about to ask.

‘You should hold him.’

Renjun blinks, ‘are you sure? you’re bonding with hi-‘

‘Jun,’ you repeat, softly, ‘he’s your son. He’s not going to hate you. Besides, I want to see my boys together.’

‘Okay,’ Renjun reaches down for the baby on your chest, cringing when the baby whines and fusses, ‘hey, don’t cry, please don’t cry.’

Renjun rocks and bounces him awkwardly but to no avail, and he sends you a look screaming for help.

‘It’s ok, Jun,’ you smile, ‘keep talking to him.’

‘He doesn’t like me,’ Renjun begins to panic, ‘he was happy with you, maybe you should-‘

‘Junie,’ you retort softly, ‘he just doesn’t like that he’s been moved. Keep talking to him, he’ll know your voice.’

Renjun gives himself a mental pep talk, slightly relaxing when he looks at the face of his baby boy.

‘It’s okay, it’s just me, I’m your daddy.’

You give Renjun an encouraging smile, and so he continues, ‘I really hope you like me from now on. Most babies don’t.’

The baby is gradually calming down at his father’s voice, so Renjun keeps talking.

‘Good boy, do you know my voice? I tried to talk to you as much as possible while you were in there so I hope you recognise it.’

The baby is now settled, staring up at his father with big brown eyes. Your heart melts at Renjun’s wide, toothy grin.

‘He likes me,’ he says to you, before turning back to the baby, ‘I think you look like a Tengfei.’

‘I like that name,’ you hum, ‘Huang Tengfei it is.’

Renjun’s smile gets impossibly wider, pride filling his chest knowing he’d just named his firstborn baby boy.

‘I love you so much, Huang Tengfei.’

jeno

You had never felt so at peace. You had just given birth to your first child, a daughter Moonbyeol in your bedroom at home a few hours earlier. Already, Moonbyeol was a very chilled baby, rarely fussing or crying. She was perfectly happy just laying on your chest, staring back at you. Jeno had been laying beside you for several hours now, engaging in hushed conversation with you about your newborn, all while unable to take his eyes off her. It hadn’t even crossed his mind that he hadn’t properly held his daughter, as you’d been snuggled together so close. As time passed, you grew more and more exhausted, the energy you had spent during the birth beginning to weigh you down. 

‘How long has it been since she fed?’ you wonder aloud, ‘the midwife said every three hours..’

‘I think it was at six,’ Jeno says, ’so three and a bit hours ago.’

‘She needs more,’ you mumble, sighing deeply, already pulling your top down to give Moonbyeol access. Jeno helps you guide her head to your chest.

‘Agh,’ the pain is sharp when she latches, and Jeno kisses and rubs your hair in encouragement.

‘You’re doing so well, look at how well she eats.’

‘It hurts so much Jen,’ Jeno’s heart hurts at the look on your face.

‘I know, I know,’ Jeno frowns, ‘it’ll get better, with time.’

‘I hope so,’ you say, ‘I feel sore all over.’

‘You’ve been so incredible,’ Jeno praises, ‘we did so well with her.’

‘Yeah, we did,’ you grin, the and the two of you settle into small talk while Moonbyeol eats. After some time, she pulls away, ready to be burped.

‘I don’t want to move,’ you admit, ‘too tired.’

‘Hey, I’ll take her,’ Jeno offers, ‘you can stay in bed. Plus, I.. I haven’t got to hold her yet.’

‘Oh. I’m sorry.’

‘It’s okay, don’t be silly,’ Jeno presses a kiss to your cheek, ‘I’ve been so close this whole time. You should get some rest.’

You suddenly realise how drained and exhausted you truly were, eyes and body heavy with fatigue.

‘I think I probably should,’ you mumble tiredly, ‘Moonie, daddy’s going to get all that horrible air up for you.’

It takes perhaps a little longer than it should have, but eventually the baby is successfully passed into Jeno’s arms.

‘Hey, Moonie,’ Jeno rests her on his shoulder, gently patting her back, ‘you’re so tiny.’

You move to lay down on your side and rest your eyes as Jeno talks to your daughter in a hushed voice.

‘You’re so beautiful,’ Jeno meets his daughters eyes, seeing his own staring back at him, ‘look at those brown eyes! So pretty. No boy will ever be good enough for such a beautiful girl.’

Jeno slowly wanders out of your room and into Moonbyeol’s nursery, wanting to give you some peace to sleep.

‘This is your room,’ Jeno turns the baby in his arms so that she’s facing the majority of the room, ‘this is where you’ll sleep, where you’ll play… I hope you like the way we decorated. If you don’t, we can change it later.’

Moonbyeol’s eyes flicker around the room, although her expression is blank.

‘Look, Moonie,’ he walks towards her unused crib, looking at the silver mobile that hangs over it, white and yellow moon and stars hanging down, ‘it’s like you! You’re our little moon star.’

Moonbyeol burps at that exact moment, and Jeno chuckles, not sure whether he should be offended or not.

‘Well, that says what you think of that.’

haechan

Donghyuck naturally comes across as a conceited and cocky person, you know that’s just his humour. He’s cheeky and bold, but at the same time down to earth and a total sweetheart. He acted quite similarly when it came to his impending fatherhood, on the outside appearing as though he was completely confident, that he would take being a father in his stride. But on the inside, he was terrified. Sometimes he would catch sight of you, his pregnant wife, and would feel a deep sense of dread alongside the rush of love that would bubble up in his chest. When you went into labour while eating dinner together, he thought he was going to be sick, the crashing realisation that this was it. You’d done so well, going through hours of contractions before your son began to struggle, and you were taken into an emergency c-section. You were crying softly as they prepared you for the surgery. Donghyuck emerged from the bathroom in his scrubs to see you laying there, and you immediately you’d reached out for him. In that moment, he knew how much you needed him, how much both of you needed him. In that moment he knew he’d do anything to be the best father and husband.

Your son Dalgun was eventually delivered through the C-section, laying on your chest for quite some time as you were stitched up and wheeled back to your hospital room. Donghyuck hates the look of discomfort on your face as you try to move around on the bed and feed. You’re exhausted, in pain and in need of a good rest, but you had to stay awake for your son.

Donghyuck tries to make himself useful, keeping the hospital room tidy and making sure your water cup was filled and you hadn’t bled too heavily onto the pad beneath you.

Part of him aches to hold his baby boy. He so desperately wants to just reach out and take the baby into his arms, shower him in all of the love he had to give. But at the same time, he didn’t want to. He was frightened that his son would be unsettled with him, that he would do something astronomically wrong like drop him. After some time, the nurse knocks softly on the door, coming to check on your surgery site.

‘Donghyuck,’ you croak, his heart hurting when he sees you laying there, exhausted and in pain with your son on your chest, ‘will you take him?’

‘I-‘ 

‘Hyuck,’ you notice the way he freezes, but he melts and relaxes at your tone, ‘its okay. You’re his daddy. You did so well at the classes.’

Donghyuck shakes himself. You’re vulnerable, you’ve just had invasive surgery and you need him. And he’s terrified of holding his own baby.

‘Okay.’

The nurse helps with the handover as it pains you to lean too far, and suddenly there’s a seven pound baby wriggling around in his arms. Dalgun cries shrilly at being moved, Donghyuck cringing as he wails.

‘Dalgun-ah,’ he clumsily rocks the baby, ‘won’t you be a good boy while mummy/mommy gets looked after? I’m not a stranger, I’m your daddy.’

Donghyuck sways on his feet, soothing Dalgun, ‘your mummy/mommy is so so brave. She is so incredible, Dalgun-ah, she’ll be the best mummy/mommy in the whole world to you, I just know it. And I’ll try my absolute hardest to be the best daddy. I love you.’

jaemin

Jaemin thinks that his daughter’s birth was nothing short of perfect. You had given birth to Chaeyeon in a birthing centre, early in the morning in a birthing pool.

Jaemin had sat right behind you, in his swim shorts, with you between his legs, not even wincing when you near crushed his hands while you pushed. Jaemin had been the one to cut the cord, before the baby was taken away to be weighed and given her first injection.

Jaemin had felt new foreign feeling of resentment towards the nurse, who he knows deep down is just doing her job and ultimately protecting your daughter from disease, but at the same time, she made his baby girl cry.

Chaeyeon is bought back to you, now with a band-aid covering her injection site. Jaemin holds you in his arms, resting his chin on your shoulder and just soaking in your daughters face. For some time, the two of you get used to Chaeyeon, taking in her appearance and mannerisms and sounds. Jaemin doesn’t even really care how dirty the water is.

‘Y/N? Why don’t we get you cleaned up a little?’ the nurse suggests, and you’re more than happy to be helped out of the pool and herded into the shower in the conjoining bathroom. Another nurse had held Chaeyeon as Jaemin carried you bridal style into the bathroom and gently setting you down on the shower seat. He hangs around for a few minutes, eyes darting between you and Chaeyeon’s general direction, clearly conflicted as to who to stay with.

‘Go and be with her Jaem,’ you hum.

’Do you need me?’

‘I’m all good here,’ you answer honestly, ‘I think this may be quite gross, anyway.’

‘Okay,’ Jaemin leans over to kiss your cheek, ‘I’ll look after her.’

‘Oh!’ The nurse left in the delivery room is holding the little bundle in her arms, ‘lets go to daddy, shall we?’

Jaemin beams as his baby girl is handed to him for the very first time. His heart feels like it may burst out of his chest as she gurgles, tiny fists waving around above the pink blankets.

‘Oh, angel,’ Jaemin coos, ‘you’re killing me.’

Jaemin knew that this baby in his arms officially completely owned his heart. He knew it was over for him, that there was nothing he would not do for his little girl.

‘You’re such a pretty girl, Chaeyeon,’ his heart aches at her glistening eyes and nose that mirrors his own.

‘You’ll have so much love in your life. You already do. You have so many uncles who are just dying to meet you, you have a godfather who would do anything for you. I.. I would die for you, I love you more than anything in this world.’

Chaeyeon waves her arm around, peeling back the blanket slightly.

‘Oh, you don’t have any clothes on,’ Jaemin brings her over to the changing table, lowering her down as slowly as he possibly can.

‘Which should be your first ever outfit?’ Jaemin sifts through the folded up baby-grows in the small suitcase you’d brought along. He picks out a white one, patterned with little brown teddy bears.

‘Uncle Mark bought you this one,’ Jaemin buttons up the onesie, ‘like I told you, everyone loves you Chae. But not as much as I do!’

Jaemin nuzzles their noses together, before cradling Chaeyeon in his chest, pressing a kiss on top of her head.

‘I love you, angel. I’ll be here for you always.’

chenle

Chenle was the best partner throughout your entire pregnancy. He did absolutely everything for you and your baby’s comfort, fulfilling your every need and wish, whether monetary, physical or emotional. 

It seemed everything had to be perfect, the quality of your care, your baby’s nursery, your birth plans, everything. If you showed any slight indication of discomfort at any point in your pregnancy, Chenle was instantly at your side, going out of his way to somehow alleviate your pain. He was almost jumpy in that sense.

He was strangely calmer than you thought he would be when you went into labour. You had been taken to the hospital where Chenle and his family had naturally made sure you would receive the best treatment, with a spacious private room and a dedicated team of familiar doctors and nurses. You laboured for hours on end. For nearly twenty hours, you’d suffered through some of the most immense pain imaginable, completely supported by Chenle who fusses over you and holds your hand through it all. Frustratingly, you had been dilating excruciatingly slowly, and eventually the doctors decide a c-section would be best for both you and your baby. 

Your beautiful baby girl joined you in the early evening. Chenle was so overcome with love for his daughter. You both knew that she would be his little princess, that he would spoil her rotten and that nobody would ever lay a hand on her. He came up with the name Caihong, meaning rainbow. She was the rainbow that brightened up his life.

When Caihong came out, they had taken her away briefly to be weighed and checked over, before returning her to you.

‘You did so so well,’ Chenle stands as close to you as he can get, still in his scrubs as they stitch you back up, ’she’s beautiful. I can’t believe it.’

‘I’m so tired,’ you laugh, having been awake for the entirety of your labour, ‘she’s ruined me.’

Chenle chuckles, ‘they’re going to wheel you back into the room once they’re done. We’ll turn the lights down. You can nap soon.’

‘M’kay,’ you roll your head back down to look at your baby, ‘she’s perfect.’

’She is,’ Chenle nods, leaning down and pressing kisses into your hair, ‘I love you both so much.’

The first hour with your daughter is so precious. You are taken back to your private room in your bed, Caihong resting on your chest the whole time. You’d done your first feed, burping her while sitting up in your bed. Once you’d finished, the nurses left, and the three of you were alone together for the first time.

‘Are you tired?’ Chenle asks, running a hand through your hair, fussing over you.

‘I’m exhausted,’ you murmur, ‘never been so tired.’

‘Why don’t I take her?’ he suggests, ‘you can lay down and have a nap.’

‘Are you sure?’ the offer is so unbelievably tempting, ‘I don’t want to just leave you on your own.’

‘I’ll be just fine,’ Chenle reassures you, ‘you just fed her. I can change her myself, if she needs you I’ll wake you.’

‘Okay,’ you nod, moving your arms so that Chenle can easily take Caihong from you.

He grunts dramatically as he raises her up, as though he was lifting some massive weight, ‘hi baby girl.’

Chenle holds Caihong in one arm as he helps you lay down comfortably, reclining your bed back down with the remote so you were laying down.

‘Comfortable?’ Chenle checks, rubbing your upper arm with his spare hand.

‘Yes,’ your eyes are already closed, ‘love you, Lele.’

Chenle grins, ‘I love you too.’

As you fall asleep, Chenle slowly does a few laps of the hospital room, rocking Caihong in his arms. Once he’s sure you’re mostly asleep, and that talking won’t disturb you, he speaks to Caihong in a hushed voice.

‘Hi my little angel,’ he stares into her shining brown eyes, absolutely entranced by her, ‘we’ve waited for so long for you. Ever since your uncle had your cousins, I’ve wanted a baby of my own. And now you’re finally here. You’re already so loved, Caihong. I’ll do anything for you.’

Caihong looks at him almost as if she’s listening and understands what he’s saying. Chenle’s heart seizes and threatens to break out of his chest, he loves her so much. 

‘You own my heart, Caihong. Daddy loves you so much.’

jisung

Jisung was the first to hold his baby girl, and although it wasn’t for long, it was a fact he took great pride in. Jisung had completely frozen up when your midwife had asked him if he wanted to deliver the baby. His mouth had dried up, completely unsure of what to say, until he caught your gaze, face slightly screwed up in discomfort, but still encouraging him to say yes. He had taken the midwife’s offer, and under her guidance, caught your baby girl as she came out. Jisung had worried that he would drop her, due to the baby being covered in blood and various bodily fluids, but thankfully he manages to keep her in his grip, holding her up for a few moments before placing her on your chest.

Jisung didn’t get her back for another hour or so, not that he minded. You handled your first hour of motherhood expertly, Chunae was an extremely calm baby who fed easily. She was so intrigued by the both of you, as you both were with her, her brown eyes studying your faces. Jisung had never felt so many overpowering emotions at once. Firstly the feeling of pride that he’d been the one to bring Chunae into the world, and the fact he had a part in creating what he believed to be the most beautiful baby in the whole world. And of course, he felt such an overwhelming and intense love for both you and your baby, after watching you go through hours and hours of labour and delivery in his family home. You had been giving skin to skin for over an hour before you offered the baby to Jisung.

‘Hey, Jisungie,’ he is immediately by your side.

‘Do you need something? Water? Another pillow? The pad changed? Are you in a lot of pain?’

You smile at how flustered and caring he is, shaking your head, ‘no, I’m alright. I just thought you might want to hold her.’

Jisung softens, heart suddenly hammering in his chest, ‘oh, y-yeah. Yeah, of course I’d love to.’

Jisung leans down and gently picks Chunae from your chest, taking a few moments to get her into a good position.

‘Hi baby girl,’ he murmurs, strangely nervous, as though it was somebody else’s child.

‘Ah, good timing,’ Jisung’s mother suddenly enters the room, ‘I made soup for you Y/N.’

‘Oh, amazing, I’m starving,’ you welcome the bowl of hot soup with both hands.

Jisung wanders the room, rocking the slightly gurgling Chunae in his arms as he approaches the bedroom window. He doesn’t really notice you watching him, his thoughts all consumed by Chunae. His mother even points it out, catching your eyes and nodding towards him. 

‘Hi,’ Jisung shakily removes a hand from underneath her to play with her own tiny hand, melting when she curls her hand around his finger.

‘You’re so small,’ he whispered, ‘like a doll. And so well behaved too, you didn’t cry one bit when I picked you up.’

Chunae just looks back up at him, and Jisung gently wipes at the spit collecting at her mouth with a cloth.

‘I promise I’ll look after you angel,’ he nuzzles his nose against hers, ‘no one will ever hurt you. They’ll have to go through me first.’

Jisung suddenly can’t get the image of his baby girl as a teenager out of his head, his getting her heart broken by some worthless teenage boy. He imagines comforting her, giving her encouraging talks and building her confidence back up, utilising the skills he would have learned as a father to his little girl over the years. But for now, he knows nothing, only what he has read in pregnancy and parenting books.

‘I don’t know much,’ Jisung rubs his thumb up and down on her face, ‘but I promise I’ll be the best father I can possibly be for you. I’ll try so hard to do everything that’s right for you. I already love you more than anything in this world.’

Chunae yawns, tiny fists flailing weakly as she does.

‘Am I boring you?’ Jisung chuckles, ’you can’t be tired, not when I’ve just got you.’

‘You should sit down with her,’ you suggest, taking a short break from your soup, ’she’ll fall asleep on you.’

‘I think I may fall asleep also,’ Jisung chuckles, although settling into the armchair near your bed. 

‘Group nap?’ You suggest, your own eyes feeling heavy.

The two of them lay there for fifteen minutes or so, talking quietly so that you don’t wake up. 

The two of them lay there for fifteen minutes or so, talking quietly so that you don’t wake up. 

The two of them lay there for fifteen minutes or so, talking quietly so that you don’t wake up. 

The two of them lay there for fifteen minutes or so, talking quietly so that you don’t wake up. 

‘Alright my love, should we go and make some breakfast?’

Yewon gasped, ‘can we have pancakes?’

‘Hmm, I don’t know…’

‘Please, daddy,’ Yewon gives her best puppy eyes, pouting.

‘Ok, just because I love you,’ Jaemin kisses Yewon’s cheek, gently lifting her down to the ground and getting out of bed himself.

‘You wanna go wake your sister?’

‘Yeah!’ 

Yewon swiftly toddles to the other side of the house, stopping in front of her older sister’s room. The two of them enter, and Yewon rockets towards Chaeyeon’s bed. 

‘Wake her gently,’ Jaemin whispers, knowing how agitated his pre-teen would get if her toddler sister jumped on her head first thing in the morning.

‘Sis,’ Yewon shakes Chaeyeon’s shoulder. 

‘What, Yewonnie?’ Chaeyeon mumbles. 

‘Time to get up for school, sweetheart,’ Jaemin feels bad for waking her up, knowing the pain from his own high school days.

‘Ok,’ she begins stretching, reaching around for her phone.

‘We’re going to make pancakes, so come down once you’re dressed.’

‘Alright dad.’

Jaemin keeps an eye on Yewon while she watches TV and he makes pancakes. 

Yewon is old enough to recognise the smell of nearly done pancakes, and toddles into the kitchen. 

‘You know when food’s ready, don’t you,’ Jaemin chuckles to himself, ‘what do you want on them?’

‘Syrup please!’ Yewon squeals, hauling her small body up onto the chair. 

‘Oh, ok, just a little bit ok?’ 

Chaeyeon joins them not long later, fully dressed with her hair already done.

Jaemin places her own plate in front of her, pancakes covered in fruit and a small amount of sugar.

Jaemin then goes to wake up Yewon’s twin brother Jejun so he can also eat breakfast.

‘Pancakes?’ He had lisped, holding up his hands and asking to be carried.

Once Jejun was in his seat and Chaeyeon had an eye on the twins, Jaemin’s next job was to wake you up.

‘I’ll get Chae to school,’ you murmur, rubbing your eyes, ‘can you watch the twins?’

‘Of course love,’ he holds the back of your head and lightly kisses your forehead, ‘they’ve all had breakfast. Just throw something comfy on. I’ll sort shoes and everything.’

‘You’re perfect.’

‘I try my best,’ Jaemin grins, letting you start getting dressed.

Once he reached the kitchen again, both of the girls had finished eating and Chaeyeon was tidying away the plates and cutlery. Jejun was still eating.

’Thank you Chae,’ Jaemin smiles, ‘mum/mom’s just getting ready so meet her at the front door and she’ll get you to school.’

‘Kay, thank you for breakfast dad.’

‘You’re welcome angel, just have a good day, alright?’

‘I will!’

You and Chaeyeon leave not long later, leaving Jaemin with the two youngest.

‘Come on, let’s get you cuties dressed.’

From a few years practice, he manages to carry both toddlers at once to their shared bedroom.

By the time you’ve finished your school run, the twins are dressed and Jaemin has done quite a good job. 

’Nooo!’ Jaemin whines when the two of them begin toddling towards the door you’re standing in, showing fake hurt at being abandoned.

He gently grabs the nearest twin, Yewon by the waist and pulls her to him.

’Not so fast!’ He exclaims, tickling her sides prompting her to begin squealing.

‘Yewonnie!’ Jejun giggles, racing back to Jaemin and trying to free his sister.

’Stop tormenting them,’ you laugh as you kick your shoes off, ‘come on, you two, daddy’s got to get ready for his schedule.’

’No,’ the twins whined, ‘why?’

‘I have a photoshoot, babies,’ he explains, gathering them in his arms and holding them by their waists, ‘but I won’t be too long. I’ll be home by dinner time, and we can eat whatever you want!’

‘Dino nugs?’ Jejun suggests.

‘Dino nugs it is,’ Jaemin grins, ‘but you’ll only have dino nuggies if you’re good for mummy/mommy, okay?’

‘Okay, I promise I will,’ Jejun smiles.

Jaemin’s heart aches as he gets dressed. Yewon follows him up to your bedroom, playing with a plushie she found while he goes from room to room getting ready.

‘What are the pictures for?’ she asks, curious about his photoshoot. 

’They’re for a magazine, Yewonnie,’ Jaemin explains, stroking stray black hairs out of her face.

‘Will you be on the front again?’

‘Yeah, I’ll be on the front with uncles,’ Jaemin beams, ‘so I have to go and take the photos!’

‘I’ll miss you until you come back dada,’ she pouts, ‘I’ll be stuck with mummy/mommy.’

‘Hey,’ Jaemin giggles, ‘that’s mean.’

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All day long Jaemin thinks about his babies. What kind of day Chaeyeon was having at school, whether Yewon was behaving herself, which toy helicopter was Jejun’s favourite today.

Once his shoot is over, he calls you.

‘Jaem,’ you answer.

‘Hi baby,’ he grins, even though you can’t see it, ‘we’ve just finished up, so I’ll be on my way home in a few minutes.’

‘Great,’ you sigh without realising it.

‘Long day sweetheart?’ He questions, ‘I’m sorry.’

‘I’m just tired, you don’t need to worry about me,’ you hum, ‘the little ones have really took the life out of me today.’

‘Did they not behave?’

‘No, it’s not that, they’ve just been running round like crazy, didn’t want to stop playing when we had to go pick Chae up..’

‘I’ll make them dinner as soon as I get in the house, and you can have a bath,’ you can almost picture Jaemin’s face live in your mind, bare face and tired eyes, if his deep slurred tone is anything to go by.

‘I should really be offering you that,’ you laugh, considering his hard day at work.

’No, you’re the real hard worker here,’ Jaemin argues, ‘I just took some photos today, you looked after the babies.’

‘Oh, I hear Jun calling for me,’ you yawn, ‘I’ll see you soon Jaem.’

‘See you sweetheart,’ the call clicks off, and you’re left to deal with Jejun’s problem.

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As soon as Jaemin comes through the front door, his youngest girl comes hurtling towards him.

‘Daddy!’ She yells, giggling when he scoops her up into his arms and hugs her tightly.

‘Princess!’

‘Dada,’ Jejun toddles behind her, ‘have you got dino nugs?’

‘Let him get through the door Jun,’ you chuckle as you appear from behind them. Jaemin gets the urge to come up to you and give you his attention, but he knows that he must attend to his needy babies first. 

‘Dino nuggies coming right up little ones,’ he grins, and the twins squeal and run back up to their bedroom.

‘Are you sure you don’t want me to put the dinner in? You should go shower,’ you begin fussing over him, hands flying around in his hair and around his face.

‘I’m just fine sweetheart,’ he smiles, ‘like i said on the phone,’ he kisses the palm of your hand, ‘go run yourself a nice bath.’

You realise that he won’t back down, so you press a kiss to his cheek, ’thank you.’

You disappear up the stairs as Jaemin begins gathering the items he needs to make dinner, including the dinosaur nuggets for the twins, rice, as well as the ingredients for the soup. 

‘Hi sweetheart,’ he greets Chaeyeon who is sitting at the kitchen counter doing some homework.

‘Hey dad, how was your photoshoot?’

‘Long,’ he sighs, ‘but good. I think we got some good photos. Your uncles were asking about you.’

‘Oh really? They ok? How’s little Sanghoon?’ She asks, referring to Jeno’s one year old son.

‘Yeah, just asking how all of you are and how big you are now and stuff like that. I did ask, apparently he’s talking moe and more everyday.’

’That’s crazy, I remember when he was just born.’

’Tell me about it,’ Jaemin smiles, ‘anyway how was school?’

‘Alright,’ Chaeyeon purses her lips, ‘got assigned a ton of homework. Mrs Cha is a sadist, I’m telling you she wants to see me suffer.’

Jaemin laughs, ‘you’re funny Na Chaeyeon. I would offer you help but I don’t think you’d want that.’

‘I don’t think Mrs Cha would want that either.’

‘I can’t argue with that.’

You reappear when dinner is a few minutes away from being ready.

‘Something smells nice,’ you comment, stumbling towards Jaemin and giving him a quick kiss.

‘Gross!’ Chaeyeon shrieks, causing you and Jaemin to start laughing.

You round up the twins from where they’re playing in the living room as Jaemin is dishing out the banchans. 

The five of you tuck in, and you spend most of the dinner asking the twins not to play with their food when they begin making their dinosaur nuggets fight.

Chaeyeon goes back to her homework while you and Jaemin bath the twins separately (together is just too much chaos). 

‘Daddy, please can you read us a story?’ Jejun asks as they climb into their own beds on either side of the bedroom.

‘Which one do you want?’

‘Caterpillar!’

‘The zoo!’

‘We can’t read both!’ Jaemin exclaims, and the twins groan.

‘How about the very hungry caterpillar tonight and the zoo tomorrow?’ Jaemin suggests, hoping to appease them. 

‘Ok,’ they drone, burying themselves under the covers. 

‘Ok so,’ Jaemin settles on the floor between their beds, ‘in the light of the moon, a little egg lay on a leaf.’

Yewon falls asleep practically during the first sentence, but Jejun manages to stick it out until the end.

‘The end,’ Jaemin concludes, gently closing the book and placing it back on the bookshelf. Jejun silently waits for Jaemin to come back and give him a kiss goodnight.

‘Night little one,’ he gives Jejun a kiss, ‘I love you.’

‘Love you too daddy,’ Jejun mumbles, settling further into the covers and closing his eyes.

Jaemin makes his way to the opposite side of the room, where he kisses Yewon on the forehead, mumbling a ‘goodnight, love you.’

He turns the lamp off, so that the only light left in the room is from the twin’s respective nightlights. He leaves the door open ajar so that you’ll hear them if they need you or they can leave the room if they have to.

You and Chaeyeon are both sprawled out on opposite ends of the sofa, Chaeyeon having finished some homework and her chore for the night, washing the dinner dishes.

‘Any room for me?’ Jaemin asks cheekily.

You move your legs away from the middle of the couch, allowing Jaemin to sit down in between you. Once he’s settled you move your feet back onto his lap, and he pats your ankles affectionately.

Chaeyeon plays around on her phone while you and Jaemin focus on the TV, watching a rerun of some reality show you don’t really care too much for. Jaemin draws circles on your bare ankles absentmindedly, eyes occasionally fluttering shut.

‘Gonna go upstairs,’ Chaeyeon announces after a while.

‘Ok, love, we’ll come say goodnight when we come up,’ you tell her, and when she leaves the room, you shift around on the sofa, moving so you can snuggle into Jaemin’s side, feeling the heat radiate from him.

Jaemin just smirks before kissing your hair gently, ‘tired?’

‘A little,’ you admit, ‘feel better after the bath though.’

‘I would’ve liked to have joined you,’ he says and you laugh.

‘One of these days,’ you hum, ‘not a chance now when there’s all these little ones in the house.’

‘It’s our wedding anniversary in a few weeks,’ Jaemin points out, ‘maybe we should book a weekend away or something. Kids can stay with mum/mom and dad.’

‘Good idea,’ you agree, ‘I think your parents would love that, actually. I think they really miss the kids.’

Jaemin sighs, ‘I miss the kids too.’

You smile sadly, ‘you work so hard for them. They know that.’

‘I know, everything I do is for them. But sometimes I just wish that being an idol didn’t mean I had to miss out on so much of their days. It feels like I’m only here in the morning when they go to school and at night when they go to bed. I miss all the in between things. Sometimes I’m not even there at all.’

You spend a few moments thinking of what to say, ‘Jaem-‘

‘I know, it’s just how it is,’ he smiles, beginning to stroke your hair, ‘I’m thinking about reducing the hours I spend at practice. Be here more.’

’They need you Jae-‘

‘You and the kids need me more. This is what I want.’

‘Okay,’ you whisper, smiling when he moves his hands to cradle your face, pressing a kiss to your forehead, and then to your lips.

‘I will, however, be booking that weekend away,’ his face suddenly brightens up, ‘we should do Jeju!’

‘We’ll decide properly tomorrow,’ you laugh.

You watch some more TV for a while, Jaemin occasionally turning to kiss your head or tapping his fingers where they rest on your hips absentmindedly.

‘Wanna go up to bed?’ Jaemin asks when he notices your eyes beginning to droop shut.

‘Yeah, we’ll say goodnight to Chae.’

The two of you ascend the stairs, briefly stopping by the twin’s room. Jaemin sticks his head around the door, heart pinching at the adorable sight of his two youngest, fast asleep, both clutching their respective plushies.

’They’re asleep,’ Jaemin whispers when he comes back around. 

You then gently knock on Chaeyeon’s door.

‘Come in,’ she calls, and you enter to see her sitting on her bed with her laptop.

‘We’re off to bed Chaeyeon-ah,’ Jaemin announces, we’ve come to say goodnight.’

‘Oh, goodnight dad,’ she closes her laptop and pushes it aside.

‘Goodnight angel,’ Jaemin leans down to give her a hug and kiss.

‘Goodnight sweetheart,’ you do the same.

‘Night mama.’

‘Go to bed soon, it’s a school night.’

‘Will do.’

You close her door, leaving you and Jaemin alone. You let out a big yawn, which then sets Jaemin off.

‘We should go to sleep too,’ he suggests.

‘You haven’t showered yet,’ you protest, worried about him and his needs.

‘I’ll do it in the morning,’ he knows he likely won’t have time and that one of the little ones will likely wake him early, but he just wants to crawl into bed with you.

You’re too exhausted to argue, so you just start your trudge into your bedroom. You begin peeling your clothes of the day off immediately, earning you a squeeze on your bare waist by Jaemin, which you squirm at.

He just throws his shirt into the washing basket, burying himself under the covers, and holding his arms out for you. 

’Goodnight sweetheart,’ Jaemin hums, kissing your forehead.

‘Goodnight Jaem,’ you move your head to kiss at where you can reach, being his chin.