Yasmin Benoit is a British aroace activist and model. She is arguably the biggest aspec activist in the Western world right now. Because she is a Black woman who makes a living modelling, she has faced a lot of sexualization, being told she doesnât âlook asexual.â In response to this, she started the hashtag #thisiswhatasexuallookslike, to prove that asexuality doesnât have a specific look.
There is a long history of Black people being hypersexualized in media, and many people have the attitude that asexuality is a âwhite thing.â Within the asexual community, Black aces are very often overlooked, excluded, and erased. As minimal as ace representation is, there is even less Black asexual representation, and what little does exist is often ignored even in the asexual community. Black asexuals deserve to see themselves represented and their identities uplifted, so for @creatingblackcharactersâs Black History Month event, I did some drawings of some of my Black asexual characters; however small my audience may be, I hope that for any Black asexuals who may (now or in the future) be part of it, you can see this part of yourselves reflected in Aros Against Fate.
[ID: a drawing of LĂ, a dark-skinned Black teenager with curly red hair. They are wearing a dark blue sweater-vest with yellow stars and using forearm crutches. /end ID]
LĂ (they/them) is a main character and greyromantic asexual.
[ID: a drawing of Daanah, a Black girl with long locs pulled up in a bun. She has golden-brown skin and glasses. /end ID]
Daanah (she/her) is a main character and alloromantic aegosexual.
[ID: a drawing of FiitsĂŁn, a Black boy with rosy dark brown skin and a big pink Afro. /end ID]
FiitsĂŁn (he/him) is a main character and lithsexual.
[ID: a drawing of LÄ«s, a Black teenager with blue braids and golden-brown skin . /end ID]
LÄ«s (he/they/she/xe/fae) is a main character and demisexual.
[ID: a drawing of Maaziariitna, a young woman-man with hairy blue skin and her hair in microbraids. /end ID]
Maaziariitna (she/he) is a main character and lesbian asexual.
[ID: a drawing of Fiyavu Ozast, a young Black woman with dark skin and silver hair. /end ID]
Fiyavu Ozast (she/her) is Rovian and Daanahâs older sister and aromantic greysexual.
[ID: a drawing of Juraji, a Black teenager with long black locs. /end ID]
Juraji (xe/xem) is Halekâs queerplatonic partner and demisexual.
[ID: a drawing of Saafeera, a dark-skinned black woman with a very short Afro. /end ID]
Saafeera is Rovian and Daanahâs mother and recipromantic recipro-demisexual and sex-repulsed.
Honorable mentions:
Taehogh (he/him), Halek, LĂ, and Maaziariitnaâs grandfather, aroaceflux.
Kjotar (he/they), teammate of KaelĂa, LÄ«s, and ZheâÄrani, lithromantic and listed in my notes as âprobably acespec.â
Abhaonai (he/him), teammate of KaelĂa, LÄ«s, and ZheâÄrani, alloromantic aceflux.
Yna (she/her), princess seeking to marry Jue and later Sei, frayromantic asexual.
Mkera (she/her), betrothed to Jue, asexual.
One of my major goals in Aros Against Fate is to celebrate aspec experiences, and Black aspecs are so often left out in conversations around aspec experience. Here I have specifically asexual characters as it was inspired by #thisiswhatasexuallookslike, but (as the title implies) aromanticism is huge in AAF, and Black aros (and aplatonics, and afamilials, and all Black aspecs) of course equally deserve to see themselves recognized and uplifted. I hope that one day we have a vast amount of diverse aspec characters in media much more mainstream than my little unpublished, unfinished, tumblr-and-google-docs story, and that Black aspec stories by Black aspec authors can gain traction within and outside of our community.
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"Well, you know," said Ausse. "I might happen to be in the area then."
"Okay."
"Can't believe you haven't even been of age this whole time," Ausse said.
Daanah shrugged. "I'm fifteen. My birthday is just a lot earlier. I actually turned fifteen ages ago, but in Kulainestainer we don't have the coming-of-age until almost the end of the year."
"Are there a lot of you this year?"
"About a dozen," Daanah said. "It's never very many. Kulainestainer's not very big."
"You Dalahe tend to have pretty small communities, don't you?" Ausse said. "Not like us." Ausse was Schwany Norve, like most of Sautgurotays.
Ausse raised her eyebrows. "Alright, then. I'll see you."
This would be Daanah's first time actually getting her hair cut more than a trim to keep it healthy. Her hair was a different texture than most other Norves, so Saafeera always took her to the Gathiya Na Theenan hair salon in the city. They'd had a consultation the other day about what Daanah wanted.
"It will take a while," Ghiyafee, the hairdresser who always did Daanah's, had said. "You have a lot of hair. I'll be gentle, but the combing will probably hurt your scalp somewhat."
So Daanah had brought the mystery she was reading and a second book in case she finished the first. She wasn't really one for chatting. Saafeera and Ghiyafee always talked while Daanah got her hair done.
"You said you want it short like your mama's?" Ghiyafee said.
Daanah nodded. She had the urge to pull at her hair. Dalahe Norves usually got their long childhood hair cut very short for their comings-of-age. It was symbolic of the transition into a new phase of life.
"How has the picking been lately?" Ghiyafee asked.
Daanah shrugged. "Reyal helps."
"Good, good." Ghiyafee pulled one of Daanah's long locs over her shoulder so she could see it in the mirror and pinched her fingers around it just above the height of her glasses. "I'm going to cut it here to begin with so there will be space to fine-tune the ends once it's all picked out."
Daanah nodded again and reminded herself that this was a good change.
Saafeera smiled at her encouragingly.
"This is my first real haircut," Daanah said quietly. "Like⊠ever."
"It's her coming-of-age soon," Saafeera said.
"That's certainly exciting," Ghiyafee said.
Daanah swallowed. "Yeah."
"You nervous?"
"âŠYeah," she said. "A little."
In the mirror, Ghiyafee nodded. "Well, if I have anything to do with it, your hair will look perfect for it."
Ghiyafee had been right about the tugging hurting her scalp. She gritted her teeth and read as Ghiyafee cut- the change in weight as the locs fell to the ground one by one was disconcerting- and then combed and talked with Saafeera.
She had been right about it taking a while, too. Saafeera left and came back with lunch at one point and they took a break. Daanah nearly finished her book. She did her best not to look up, not wanting to see it until it was done.
She had worried about how expensive all that work would be, but Saafeera had told her that her coming-of-age was one of the most important days of her life and she wasn't going to let Daanah have anything less than what she wanted for it and that it was her aunt Chaariya's gift too.
Ghiyafee was especially careful working in the conditioner afterwards; she knew how sensitive Daanah's scalp always was. "You'll want to be gentle with it for a little while. It's fragile now; don't try to braid anything in. Let it rest."
Daanah made an affirmative noise.
"Alright," Ghiyafee said excitedly. "Take a look."
Daanah cautiously looked up at the mirror. "Oh!"
"Do you like it?"
Daanah touched her short, tight curls, careful not to let herself pull. "I⊠had forgotten what my hair looks like loose."
"It looks beautiful," Saafeera said.
"I think so," said Daanah. She mostly felt overwhelmed. It was very different and would take a bit of time for her to get used to, but she was sure she would like it a lot once she did.
The evening before Daanah's coming of age, AilĂt tapped her on the shoulder and signed "I have something for you."
She pulled Daanah into her and Fiya's section of the starhouse. Fiya lay asleep in the middle of the bed, the baby monitor next to em paired with the vibrating one AilĂt wore on a string around her neck.
Daanah looked at the lack of barriers around em anxiously.
"Ey doesn't roll yet, and your mum says it will be a good while before ey does, so I'm not worried about looking away for a couple minutes," AilĂt signed. "I wouldn't do anything that wasn't safe."
Daanah nodded.
AilĂt turned away for a moment to open her jewellery box while Daanah watched Fiya's tiny chest rise and fall.
AilĂt put a handful of metal revaap pins with little beaded flowers on the ends into Daanah's hands. "These belonged to Fiyavu Ozast," she signed. "I want you to have them. I know Rovian wears her revaap more, but they're not really her style, and I thought you would like them for your coming-of-age."
Daanah burst into tears.
All of Kulainestainer was here- and then some.
"This is exciting for you," said TalĂ, sounding semi-confident.
Daanah nodded. "Yes." She fiddled with one of the pins AilĂt had given her and added, "I wish Fiyavu Ozast were here."
TalĂ held her hand in an attempt at comfort that Daanah appreciated.
The thirteen of them were lined up based on birthday order, which meant Daanah was fourth.
A very small stage had been erected in the village square, about a foot off the ground- a ramp, then space for the senior priest and one other person to stand comfortably, then a ramp back down, and that was it. Daanah had been on a lot of stages recently, but this was the one she had always anticipated. This was, in some ways, the most important one.
She winced slightly as she accidentally ripped a hair out of her arm. Reyal was with her family, but maybe Daanah should have kept her with her to help her stay calm. She didn't want to freeze.
"Your turn, Daanah," the girl behind her whispered, and Daanah almost panicked at the realization that she had lost touch with the now.
Butterfly wings on her bare arms, butterfly wings uncomfortable under her clothes.
She stepped forward.
"Child of Maidallis Leykin and Saafeera Riwazee," Curain said. "What is your name now?"
Daanah tried to speak and failed. She swallowed and tried again. "Daanah Chaariya Addeyn Leykin Riwazee."
She heard Saafeera cheer, and blushed with equal parts embarrassment and pride.
"What gender do you want to live as, Daanah Chaariya Addeyn Leykin Riwazee?"
Curain hadn't approved of her initially, but ze had become a strong ally with time, never tolerating anyone being disrespectful. Everyone in Kulainestainer was pretty much used to it by now, even the most traditional of them. No one who came to their village to see the Scribe of the South got very far if they didn't treat her right.
"I'm a woman," Daanah said. The butterfly wings split into a different shape, belying her anxiety. She reassured herself that even if some people had probably expected her to just grow out of it, no one here would disrupt the ceremony over it.
Curain informed her of her rights and responsibilities as a Dalahe Norve adult.
"When you are next upon the ground," ze said, "you will be an adult of our community."
[ID: A (mostly) pencil crayon drawing of a teenage girl with light/medium brown skin and very long black locs. Her locs are fanned out behind her and are almost floor-length, with spiralling golden jewellery on them. She has golden eyes on her arms and brown eyes in the usual place. She is wearing a gold headpiece, glasses, nail polish, lipstick, and bracelets. She is wearing long yellow and white sleeveless robes and is surrounded by a golden halo. /end ID]
Artist's notes:
The little symbols on the yellow part of her robes is "Alteyr's Quill," one of Hir widely-recognized symbols.
This is. Extremely yellow. I love yellow and even I think this is a lot of it.
I wanted to give her some big awesome sceptre of some sort but I forgot about it until it was all outlined and mostly coloured in... Alas. Imagine it for me. In our hearts she can have a big awesome sceptre.
Stared at this for ages trying to figure out what's up with her mouth/chin (?) and I think it's that I forgot to outline the separation between her upper and lower lip so there's a weird blob-like quality there, combined with the lines of her slight double chin bleeding into the edges of her mouth a little and making it look like her chin might be her lower lip and her whole mouth might be her upper lip, since the gold is not as noticeably distinct from the brown as a more natural colour might be.
Her hair is supposed to be sort of floating behind her in a mystical ethereal kind of way but idk if that comes across.
I drew this for @creatingblackcharacters's Black Girl Magic May, since Daanah is quite literally very magical.
Used wax crayon for her hair to give it some texture, pen/fine-tipped marker for the outlining and her eyes, and pencil crayon (or coloured pencil, for those of you who aren't Canadian) for everything else.
Yes, the bracelets are irritating on the transient magic eyes. At least they're loose. She really doesn't like tight bracelets and she's not going to wear them.
(Trying something new with this "Artist's notes" section. Seems more coherent than dumping all my scrambled commentary in the tags.)
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"Because of the contract," he whispered. "Ei-nai could break my family apart again just as easily as ei-nai gave it back. If I break the contract I will die and they will be split up again."
"Do you want to use me?" she said. "Do you want to hurt me?"
"Never."
Daanah reached down and touched his face like a blessing.
She heard his breath hitch.
"Comrades," she said. She had promised to save him and she would.
He reached up and grabbed her hand against his cheek. "Comrades," he repeated quietly.
Half of Daanah's skin was eyes now. Her head throbbed from what it was doing to her vision.
She wished she was prone to something else. Ausse grew feathers, and Daanah was sure that was painful, but at least it wasn't eyes. They made her so nauseous and her clothes against them was so distracting.
She laid her head down for a minute and tried to close all her eyes to give her brain a break from trying to manage the fractured sight.
Ausse gnawed on the end of one of his short pair of braids. It was the first thing Daanah had ever seen him do that might indicate anxiety. Purple feathers weeping blood were all over his body, so Daanah assumed they had him to thank for the favourable weather. Ffeira lingered close to his side, with Ptoled protectively watching their backs.
jumping on @oh-no-another-idea's WIP Acrostic tag for the word "DREAM"
All of these will be from the last two chapters + part of the epilogue of Empires Always Fall because the document got too big so I had to have a separate one for chapter 69 onwards and it's a pain to open the main one and find anything in there right now
D: Daanah nodded again and reminded herself that this was a good change.
R: RaiqiongshÄ stomped back over and grabbed Jue's other arm, hard. He was so angry. Jue was always making him angry. Ze hated making him angry.
E: Everything went suddenly silent. Now it really was just Jue's shallow breathing and fast heartbeat.
A: "All I ever wanted was for both of us to be safe," Fiitsãn said. "Do you⊠Do you think we will be, now? Do you think things will be better now? They're supposed to get better now but do you think we'll be okay?"
She was at the point of overwhelm where she would be ripping bits of her hair out if her hands weren't occupied greeting people, and she was well sick of taking people's hands. This had better be over soon or Daanah was going to snap and lose all pretense of being grown-up and composed.
This next hand was strong and calloused. Daanah looked up, and up some more- nothing made her feel short more than meeting very tall people- to a rough, tattooed, terra-cotta face.
"I am Mightiest Sheffad." Her voice was gruff.
"I have a poster of you on my wall," Daanah blurted. She just barely managed not to add "with a lot less clothes and a lot more sweat."
Mightiest Sheffad was an arena fighter, one of the only Norves in the big leagues and Daanah's absolute favourite athlete of any sport.
Thankfully, Mightiest Sheffad just smiled, her eyes crinkling kindly. "I find that I am especially popular with teenage girls."
"You're so cool," Daanah breathed.
"You are the Favoured of Alteyr." Mightiest Sheffad brought her lips to Daanah's knuckles. Daanah's stomach fluttered as she tried not to hyperventilate. "I would be honoured to fight in your name in the upcoming Zioshue tournament."
The next person to approach her shoved a microphone in her face, which on its own made Daanah want to leap over the barrier and bludgeon them with it. "How do we know you're reliable? Your sister is a deserter."
Fiyavu Ozast.
Daanah made a sound low in her throat. Dozens of extra teeth pushed their way painfully through her gums.
She had enjoyed meeting Mightiest Sheffad, but it hadn't exactly helped her feel less overwhelmed, and how dare anyone mention Fiyavu Ozast in such a way- even remembering it was enough to get her almost boiling over again.
"Move!" Someone pulled her roughly into a doorway, and from the shock all of those teeth came back.
Daanah screamed.
"Shh. Look." A gloved hand pointed up to the roof of a nearby building.
Daanah squinted, light glaring off her glasses lenses. "What?"
"Closer." The voice was muffled, a bit, like right after Fiyavu Ozast had had her wisdom teeth removed.
"I don't- oh." There was someone laying almost flat against the edge of the roof. The light glaring off her glasses was reflecting originally off the long barrel of a gun.
"There are others, too, following you. Laying in wait."
"Oh," said Daanah again, shaken. "Who- Who are you?"
Daanah's savior came properly into her field of vision. Probably RÄmiq, a girl not much older than Daanah. She was supported on one side by a crutch, and the veins of nearly half her face were blackened like nothing Daanah had ever seen before. "Kitty."
"That's your name?" Some people were named after animals, of course, but she'd never heard of a human called that before. She'd heard of cats called Kitty before, of course, and always thought it was rather uncreative.
"A nickname."
"Do you like cats?" Daanah asked. "I have two cats. I can show you pictures-"
"Not right now," Kitty said, peering out of their alcove. "I can bring you inside a few blocks from here, if we can get there⊠How come you're out here all alone?"
"Oh." Daanah's face warmed with embarrassment. "I⊠I needed some air. Urgently. I wasn't really thinking aboutâŠ" About people maybe trying to assassinate her.
Why would she have been thinking about people trying to assassinate her? This- all of this, being Alteyr's Favoured and traveling the empire and meeting Mightiest Sheffad and apparently being targeted for assassination- was the most ridiculous, unexpected, unreal thing that had ever happened to her, like something she would make up to entertain herself on the verge of falling asleep.
"Okay," said Kitty. "Well, we can't stay here forever. She's not going to just get up and leave anytime soon."
"Okay," said Daanah. "Wait, she?"
"Slip of the tongue," said Kitty. "I meant to say⊠ai-ziu? I'm pretty sure you're being targetted by the Temple of Corysecli. Just guessing with the age though, but let's go with ai-ziu. Youngish adult seems a decent estimate. I caught a closer glimpse earlier." She stuck her head out again and looked around, then pulled it back in. "Okay, well, there's more people on the street now. It's as good a time as any." Kitty looked her up and down. "Are you wearing anything under those robes?"
"Um, just stockings," said Daanah, blushing again. "And, you know, a bra and underpants⊠The robes are pretty warm so I didn't really needâŠ"
"I didn't think so," said Kitty. She draped her coat over Daanah's shoulders. "Try and fit those sleeves into the coat's. Take off some of the jewelry- the gold in your hair-"
Kitty's hair was short and thin, nothing like Daanah's. "I can't take the clasps off right now," Daanah said. "I'd have to take down all my hair, and then take them all out one at a time, and then put it all back up, and it's not at all quick."
"Just pull the hood up, then," said Kitty, pulling her own hat low and her scarf high. "As far over your face as you can. Our best chance is blending in with the other pedestrians."
Daanah tugged the hood over her hair. It wasn't really big enough to shadow her face with all the space her bun took up.
"Okay." Kitty took her hand and Daanah almost pulled away, but they needed to stick together. "Casually."
She stepped back onto the sidewalk, pulling Daanah with her.
Daanah's heart raced. It felt like everyone who passed them or glanced at her was after her. Any corner or rooftop could hold her killer and she wouldn't know until it was too late.
She glanced over her shoulder. She was sure they were being followed.
"Casually," Kitty reminded her under her breath.
I am casual! Daanah wanted to snap. She wished again for Reil. She wasn't at all aggressive, but a big dog tended to warn people off a bit.
She kept walking and tugged at the roots of her hair, casually.
"Excuse me." Someone tugged on Daanah's sleeve.
She turned automatically, before she had time to think or to register the widenning of Kitty's eyes.
Then she was grabbed from behind, an arm around her neck and a hand clamped tightly over her mouth.
Daanah's extra teeth had not receded, and as spurs of bone shot from her spine, she bit. Clamped on hard and sank all those extra divine teeth into flesh. The familiar iron tang of blood spilled into her mouth. No one could deny that she was a screamer, but she was good for more than just screaming.
Being bitten and presumably lightly impaled by Daanah's spines made her attacker shove her away with a shout. Some of Daanah's extra teeth left with the hand, which was a relief of pressure for Daanah and probably super freaky for her attacker.
Daanah spun to face her attacker just as a sharp pain knifed through her.
She looked down.
Kitty's coat was slashed through. Red-tinged gold seeped through the fabric.
Gold, she realized, that was her own blood. Far golder than she'd ever seen it.
Had she been stabbed?
She looked back up, feeling the way the gold-crusted wound was already closing. Kitty had jumped in to protect her, but she wasn't doing well. Daanah had watched a lot of fights, though, and from the way she was moving, Kitty would be a good fighter if not for her left side's apparent partial paralysis.
Well. Daanah was not letting Kitty, this kind stranger, die for her.
She let out a battle cry and jumped into the fray, giving her divine body permission to do whatever it would to protect them.
And then there were bones, and gold, and teeth, and she felt more power coursing through her than she ever had but she also felt like Daanah had been shoved down and overwritten by the power.
Kitty fell backwards, her hat tipping up and her scarf falling down, and their attacker froze, eyes widening and jaw dropping slightly.
The magic took the brief opening and she pounced, spikes of bone slicked with gold drawing ever closer to the vital parts of the attacker.
Daanah didn't want to kill them. Another scream as she pulled the spikes back, back, back into her body, and it hurt, it hurt, but she wouldn't give so much control to the unthinking, amoral divinity of her body that it made her kill.
Their attacker was just staring, not at Kitty now but at whatever writhing horror Daanah was.
Suddenly someone hit them on the back of the head and they went down. Daanah didn't have it in her to focus on what was happening around her. Maybe it had been Kitty.
Distantly, as the magic still fought her but nonetheless receded into her body, she heard another voice.
"Wh⊠What should we do with her now?"
"CallâŠ" Kitty's voice. "Not an ambulance. Call someone to drive us back to the safehouse. We need a big back seat. Then⊠Ugh. I guess we'll have to call the Balance to have someone come get her when she recovers."
"And.."
"Different car, and she saw my faceâŠ"
Her body finally under control, Daanah slipped away.
She woke up laying on a worn couch in a softly-lit room. Kitty sat in a chair across from her, a sketchbook in her lap.
"Was I asleep for long?" Daanah asked.
"A quarter of an hour, maybe half an hour," Kitty said, tilting her hand back and forth. "Not long. Someone's on the way to pick you up."
Daanah recalled the stranger, and Kitty's mention of a safehouse. "Who are you people?"
"We're a TelÄso organization," said Kitty cautiously, which explained the gloves. Daanah understood her trepidation- many Senki were hostile towards the TelÄso, calling them necromancers for their death-focused religion and rituals. Daanah, of course, was not; she may only believe in Fusion Norvic Senki theology herself, but she found all theologies equally fascinating and worthy of respect.
"We're called Elyd," Kitty added.
"Oh." Daanah stiffened and sat up. "Then why did you save me?"
Kitty eyed her critically, then offered a wry half-smile. "You're doing a damn good job getting under the empire's skin if the Temple of Corysecli is after you."
