It’s not the Fast and the Furious

Don’t rush it. Take it slow at first and get a feel for what they like. It’s not the Fast and the Furious btw. One of the most important things to do is for you and your partner to relax. Seriously, it’ll be fine, you got this!  Kiss your way down their body and tease their thighs and butt. This will turn them on before you start the real action. Get close so that they think you’re going to go down any second, but don’t give in immediately.

Driving them crazy

Make sure you spend time getting them aroused before you head south. When they’re ready, kiss them on the outside of their panties. Breathe hot air through their panties against their vag area. Breathe softly but warmly for short bursts at a time. You can alternate between doing this and kissing their thighs and stomach. Teasing them will drive them crazy and make them wet and ready.

Slow and steady

Start out gentle, start licking slowly then gradually speed it up. Take time to explore the whole region, teasing them with your tongue. When you begin to kiss and lick their vulva, work your way in slowly from the outside. Start by licking the outer edges of the outer lips (labia), then very slowly spread them, and lick and kiss the inner lips, and around the vagina. Do this gently, as though you were still teasing them. 

Avoid the clit, at first

Try to avoid coming in contact with their clit for as long as you can, even as you kiss their labia and vagina. When you reach their clit, lick softly and focus on the clitoral hood (just above the clitoris), since most people prefer indirect clitoral contact before they’re fully aroused.  If they grind faster as you lick them, press your tongue harder on their clit and go faster. If they grind slowly, then slow it down and try flicking your tongue softer because their clit may be becoming sensitive.

Know your alphabet

If you’re not sure which strokes are best to approach the clit, try licking the alphabet by licking the shape of every letter in the alphabet.  As silly as that sounds, it does work. While doing this, make your licks wide from time to time to cover the whole genital area, and make them small at other times, centering on the clit itself.

Suck it 

As they become more aroused, you can gently suck their clit into your mouth and flick your tongue over it. This combination of suction with a much faster rhythm will drive them crazy.

Listen and learn

Listen carefully to what they say and the sounds they make. If they sound excited, keep doing what you’re doing for as long as you can. When they seem to respond less, it’s time to try a new stroke.

Learn to hum

Closing your mouth and humming against their clit, adding vibrations as you lick, will stimulate their clit and vagina. 

Get into it

Use your entire face when you’re going down on them — your nose, cheeks and chin and move them around. Even if you’re just using your mouth, shaking your face from side to side and up and down will enhance friction in a great way.

Finger licking good

It’s important to have clean, well-groomed hands when you’re touching a person’s genitals. Keep your fingernails trimmed and filed, to avoid scratching their sensitive skin. Don’t cut your nails right before hooking up; they’ll still be too rough and sharp to touch. Everyone’s body responds differently, so you’ll want to play around with a few different ways of touching to figure out what they like best. Circle around their clit with one finger, gliding diagonally across the surface, rubbing up and down, or going side to side. Next, try using your fingers inside of them, starting with one, then moving up to two and three. Then try using one hand inside of them and the other on their clitoris. Ask them, “do you like it better when I do this or this?” Or see which approach makes them moan louder or breathe heavier. Once you’ve got them going, make sure you pay attention to their clit. Most people need repetitive, consistent clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm. Find your rhythm and don’t make any changes as they start to near their climax. Also, penetrating your partner with one finger and making a “come here” motion is a great way to locate their G-spot, which will increase their orgasm. Alternate using your fingers and licking.

Lube is your friend

When fingering them remember: the skin on their genitals is delicate. You don’t want your fingers pulling and tugging at their skin when you’re touching them, so using lube when you’re fingering them is a plus. You can use their natural fluids as lubricant (just dip your fingers into their vaginal opening), but doesn’t last as long as lube and they may feel embarrassed if they get dry. Lube will not only decrease their discomfort (and any potential pain), but it will also increase sensitivity and help your fingers move better. FYI: silicone lubricant lasts longest and feels best against the skin.

Don’t stop, they’re so close

When your partner is nearing orgasm, make sure you do everything they want you to. No matter if you have a kink in your neck or your arm’s falling asleep, keep doing exactly what you’re doing until you’re sure they’ve orgasmed.

Know when enough is enough

The clit is extremely sensitive after climax, so when their orgasm is over, you don’t want to keep licking it as intensely as you were before they reached orgasm. As they climax, continue licking, but gently taper off as their reaction begins to mellow.

Be creative