I’m feeling kinda evil and want to create a pan-Germanic anti-Esperanto. Just take the most annoying and difficult features from each Germanic language and create a super complicated and frustrating language, taking in each case the vocab that is the most false-friend-y or else has a totally different etymology than the word each neighbour language uses.
It will have the 2 different conditional moods, the complicated comma and capitalization rules of German; the random pronunciation and the 10 different meanings for each word of English; the 98453 vowel sounds of Danish, the grave accent and weird use of definite adjective/noun forms of Swedish; the general grammatical complexity of Icelandic; the random Hebrew imports of Yiddish (also to piss of the Nazis who might want to use it); it will definitely have ð, þ, ö, ä, ü, å, ø and ß. Having ø and ö is especially fun since they’re basically the same letter, it will be completely random where you have to use ø and where ö, but if you mix it up you’ll call someone’s mom a rabid chipmunk.
I love the way Swedish massacres French words (enquête -> enkät, wonderful! sauce -> sås, great!) and makes everyone wince, I delight in the way Swiss German makes you use certain verbs twice if they accompany other verbs. My language will have all of those features. Capital letters will be written in Old German Kurrentschrift, lower case letters in Anglosaxon runes.
