#crash test

finally posting this even though it's been like 2 weeks since i finished lmaooooooo, it's not very polished, but i think that adds to it. i really like the cover, i find that the line "and if the teto truck kills the both of us, to die by your side, oh the pleasure, the privilege is mine" get stuck in my head way too often

As part of sweeping changes made to the UK's fragmented rail industry, Great British Railways (GBR) is implementing a modernized set of certification criteria that includes safety trials for a "Complimentary Top Class," or in other words, passengers riding on top of train cars.

Drafted in response to the common practice of riding externally on trains in South Asian countries, GBR is welcoming the cultural norm in the spirit of inclusivity.

While controversial, the director of GBR assured journalists during a media scrum that the UK is crash testing its trains in preparation for its rising immigrant population: "Look, people keep asking us why we can't just put seatbelts on the roof, and the short answer is that we'd have to recertify every train in the nation," he said.

"What we can do, and what we're currently doing right now, is use taxpayer funds to procure thousands of East Indian-simulating crash dummies... you know, to get a feel for how this thing will play out on the tracks," he added.