#coronabride

3.22.21

UM HI MY WEDDING MIGHT ACTUALLY HAPPEN THIS YEAR!

Sorry I haven’t updated in a while! Since the new year I’ve started to get back into planning and becoming more hopeful for our wedding to actually happen since Gov. Baker has loosened restrictions and brought numbers back up to 100 inside and 150 outside which is perfect for our tent reception still unsure about the ceremony but we only have about 140 on our list at the moment & I think 20% will not attend. The other good news is the dance floor is open again! And finally we most likely will have a large number of the wedding guests and wedding party vaccinated which just helps so much! I pray that masks are optional for October 10, 2021.

I also took my mother in law to be out to brunch and filled her in on all things wedding and asked if she would mind making an alter piece for us or something to go on the signage and we can have a few guests or MOHs transfer those over to the reception!

We are talking to our wedding venue Saturday to go over updates and restrictions or ones lifted and just catch up since we haven’t really spoke or planned in a year. I can’t wait to feel like a bride and I’m trying to lose some of the weight I gained over this past year but my wedding dress fits like a glove I’m actually so surprised and happy it is beautiful I missed it so much! I was able to try it on at my tailor’s house and we planned out alterations and some costs. Finally I spoke with my make-up artist and hair stylist. I plan to do a “final look” reveal brunch with my mother in law, sister in law, niece and possibly my mom and maybe the Maid/Matron of honor? Not sure if I want to keep it just family. 

Tonight I was just going over my budget & would love to get some more lingerie for the honey/minimoon. I bought the cutest ring box for my engagement & wedding ring, it will be so perfect for the detail photos. That’s it for now, next will be sending out bridal shower invites & I need to choose what dress I want to wear for the bridal shower. I can’t wait for dressing rooms to open back up!

I got married on the Monday before lockdown.

We wanted to get married in May. We had something beautiful planned. People bought plane tickets, we’d signed contracts, everything was ready to go.  

But then things started getting bad.  This was before the bans on gathering, before social distancing became a mantra. We saw what was coming, though, and we knew we had to make the decision quickly.  We thought about our family and friends, putting themselves at risk to travel. We thought about the people our family and friends would interact with while traveling. We thought about the healthcare workers  who will be on the front lines of this in a few days.  So we delayed our wedding five months and decided to elope. We chose 3/18 and got everything prepared for it.

Except then Monday morning, we found out the courts were closing.

We were DETERMINED to save our right to marry (that we’ve only had for five years) from the maw of the virus. So, with one hour’s notice, two of our friends threw together the most splendid ceremony we could have hoped for. We stood in the front yard of our friends’ house.  Neighbors gathered to watch, standing 6 feet apart in the cul de sac. A little girl we didn’t know threw flowers for us. Someone brought his dog (what’s a wedding without a dog?  Boring.  It’s boring). Someone gave us a bottle of champagne. Someone else brought flowers from her daughter’s baby shower and made us bouquets, while yet another person lent me her grandmother’s pearls because we’d forgotten the ones from my own grandma.  My wife’s best friend stood by her, our hostess stood by me because my family was in other cities and states, and my sister joined on video chat. We got married mere hours before the gathering ban was handed down, and it was incredible.

I love our wedding story. It’s only two weeks old, but god I love our wedding story. In the midst of a pandemic, we got married. In the middle of heinous bigotry, xenophobia, and racism, we got married. I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow, but I know who I’ll be with.

As a wedding gift to us, please consider doing a couple of things:

1) Stay home. Flatten the curve. Even when you think that quick trip to the grocery store isn’t a big deal, trust me - it is.  Try going just once a week.  Only take what you need.  Respect senior hours.  Don’t shop at the first of the month, when people on fixed incomes get their checks.

2) We all miss our friends and family right now.  If we don’t visit them now, we will get to visit them later.

3) Find racism and xenophobia and stamp that shit out. If you can afford it right now, intentionally order delivery from Asian-owned restaurants and go to Asian-owned grocery stores. Correct people who call COVID-19 “China flu” or “Wuhan flu.” Protect our Asian community members.

4) Respond with love. Whatever you see, respond with love (and whimsy, if you have any to spare).

- Chloe Deng