#conflictedness

I like debates about morals for some reason. Probably because my favourite fictional character's stories usually revolve around his morel compass: "should I kill this man?", "Should I leave him to die?", "why can't I bring myself to do this?!". Those types of stories always get my brain going, debating what is right and what is wrong, should morals apply when dealing with hard boiled criminals, can horrible criminals change, yada yada. These always make me rethink my personal morals and think of other's perspective on morals, the subjectivity of it is just so damn complex and requires a certain level of higher thinking to fully grasp it. IDK, I like feeling smart IG.

I want to die, but I can't put my family and friends through that. But I'm really not dealing with this shit, and its only getting worse. I don't want to be selfish, but I can't be cruel.