Jul 15
the curse of latching onto the parent that treats you the least bad
#colaposting#💫🥤#she buys me everything i want and need and takes me places even when i dont ask#we play and shes nice sometimes#and then RANDOMLY theres a switchup and im a liar and im getting smart and it stresses me out i wish she was consistent so i knew how to fee#but like… thats my mommy :( idk how to feel#luckily my father is consistently an asshole and he'll die before me and i get to live a few decades peacefully#but this isnt about him…#even when im away she finds a way to get upset… like what did i do#ik im not the problem but sometimes it feels hard to believe myself when i think that#because theres no way that BOTH parent just dont know how to love me but can love their other kids#i fear the one safe adult i have will one day see past this facade that i didnt even know i was playing#idk every other safe adult i have are dead - a plushie - or were invented by my mind as a trauma defense mechanism#it is what it is 💭#its because im black and gay isnt it wowee#vent tw#vent cw#vent tag#rant tw#rant cw#rant tag#rant tags#vent post
