#cog sci

Things I find interesting: I never really heard "information geometry" really exists and that I just made that concept up... After looking more closely at it, it is really the same as in my conception.

The same case was with the concept of feedback loops in chaos theory. Somewhat I didn't really care enough about chaos theory to look it up more deeply. I called them "re-cycling loops", which is actually the exact same concept as the already known 'feedback loops'...

The key why this happens is my decade-long training to calibrate and fine-tune my intuition to accurately simulate the object of focus, similar to principles of deep learning and neural networks.

Intuition is the 'coordinator' in association-based cognitive processing. Associations are 'pop-ups' from the merely subconscious side of cognition. Analogies are a special from of associations in which one reduces the object of focus to the primary main principle, and comparing it with similar principles in 'the database of knowledge' (memory). Association-based cognitive processing has a primarily unstable state, the stability is created and maintained primarily by large quantities of information that are heavily connected with each other. Furthemore association-based cognitive processing is marked by a dispersion of trains of thought into 'parallel channels', which are merely subconscious in linear (non-association-based) cognitive processing. This dispersion often weakens the strenghth of the working memory.

This also relates to the Bayesian coding hypothesis, which states that the working memory can be portrayed as a Gaussian standard distribution.

The non-linearity in the flow of thoughts then leads to self-interference between the parallel trains of thought, and turns the cognitive processes into a chaotic system. This leads to a huge similarity to the way how quantum-based systems operate.

Furthermore I am baffled that a lot of concepts/explanation models I started to create more than 10 years ago seem to be more and more correct the more I understand the underlying principles and the implications of that.

An example is a pappus' conical helix surrounded by a sperical helix (like a spiral system projected onto a horn torus);

This was the model I came up with to somewhat explain the attributes of elementary particles. Unlike in string theory, the underlying 'geometries' are not seen as literal, physical geometries, but rather a partially metaphorical version of that: Information geometry, hence, a form of statistical data.

This data is, to be concrete, a huge collection of previous interaction patterns. In ourse of time and with every new interaction the information geometry gets 'shaped', and the behavior and interaction pattern "solidifies", leading to the attributes of the various elementary particles. This 'shaping' is a result of emergence.

Furthermore, it is said, elementary particles are quanta of information, and yes, this is true in a literal manner, according to my hypothesis. Yet, this concept requires a medium, called "mathematical reality", in which the physical reality is embedded. Mathematical reality can be regarded as an "unknotted network" of information. If mathematical reality loops and knots itself, then, that is tme point where physical reality arizes.

This train of thought led me to what I named "cosmic weaving", which is about weaving sequences of imaginary numbers, creating the "fours states of reality", which relate to the four combinations of real/imaginary structures/processes. (Structure-process-complexes are, in a sense, self-interfering, self-replicating loops.)

Real processes are active interactions, imaginary processes are passive interactions, real structures are physical structures, imaginary structures are mathematical structures. Combinations of these four relate to the four 'states' of information weaving:

Time (imaginary structure, imaginary process), space (real structure, imaginary process), motion (imaginary structure, real process) and matter (real structure, real process)

In this interpretation, matter can be declared as a kind of 'folded spacetime' - just what John Wheeler defined as "quantum foam"...

So..

Beispiel:

"Wer bin ich, und wenn ja, wie viele?"

- Grammatikalisch erschließt sich die logische Schlüssigkeit dieses Satzes nicht, weil die Frage "Wer bin ich?" mit "wenn ja,..." rein grammatikalisch kaum kohärent logisch ist, denn der zweite Teil impliziert die verborgende Existenz der Frage "Bin ich überhaupt?".

"Grammatologisch" wäre in diesem Fall das Erkennen dieses verborgenen Denksegments, welches sich erst durch einen Prozess des Überdenkens ergibt.

--

Currently lt's disabling. My focus is non-existent. My clumsyness is so severe that I even refuse to leave the bed, not due to being depressed, but because I have no "brain capacity" to determine my moves properly without causing chain reactions of incidences. It is no exaggeration, but whenever I attempt to solve a problem (like a glass of water fell down..) I cause even more shitty incidences. It's the quanity and frequentation of those incidences that is disabling.

My sensory problems are severe as well. Both sensory processing is deficitary as well as the "output" via motoric control of my body.

Whenever I fail 90% in what I do, I always remember all the shitty degrading comments I received.

I had a bit of self esteem, but thanks to severely desinterested psych workers I have lost my self esteem entirely.

Everyday I hear these comments in my mind and I have nothing to hold against it. I have no counter-example. I have so few experiences where I could achieve something, where my kind of thinking was even wanted.

Constantly being deemed as dumb and whatever is painful when you know you can be smart - with a bit of self esteem and trust in yourself, with just few affirmative words - and an option to advance your knowledge and skills.

Having no options to use my knowledge and skills - and especially not being able to improve and work on them makes me sad. Additionally, working on expanding/improving my knowledge and skills could help me with my self-esteem.

It's saddening.

In the last months I could not train my mind enough to remain functional.

I need daily mental workout to remain a basic level of functionality of basic cognitive abilities. It's like a person with muscular dystrophy - they have to train hard everyday just to remain at a basic functionality.

My verbal and communication skills severely decreased over the last months. Whenever I attempt to write something - may it be poetry, philosophy or about STEM topics it turns into utter gibberish shortly after I started writing.

Even basic grammar becomes deficitary. Word finding problems are severe too.

My brain is super slow. Processing information is filled with more errors than i am able to detect and correct via metacognition. Even basic perception is exhausting because of this. In moments of severe exhaustion my vision becomes double (double pictures) and if I continue the exhausting task (mostly tasks that require much working memory capacity) I become delirious and then fall asleep while doing the task... mental overload... mental shutdown. Mental CPU used by 100%.

The dissociation aspect in my cognitive processes makes it all too difficult, as, well, my memory is like a server having multiple co-existing sub-systems - each of them is also errorous. And sending information between the servers, as to use this analogy, is a very "mental-CPU-exhausting task"...

.... hmmm I might want to write an article about cognitive processes in general - and how it is with my own sensory as well as memory processing. Some weeks ago I started doing short explanations of analogies between cognitive processes and "computer and math terms".

I also want to use pseudocode to depict some "working mechanisms" of my cognition, so to speak.

(I made these many months ago:)

Additionally, my English suffers as well, because I constantly switch between the languages in my mind - The bilingualism requires too much "brain power", and often I come up with mixed German-English word-gibberish. I don't even recognize I switch between the languages if I talk with a person who us unable to comprehend/speak English.

Additionally, when I construct my sentences far too many synonyms pop up in my mind - and too many options how to deliver my thoughts/put my thoughts into sentences occur simultaneously - which results in a kind of entangled soup clot - and I mix all these chains of thought together and it becomes utterly incomprehensible in the end.

What sort of phenomenon is that?

And for the programming part: In regards of my very bad working memory and being prone to soo many awful errors due to high uncertainty in my porbability-based thinking, I start to create my own programs/apps to help myself. As for my theoretical/science/math work, I try to write an algorithm helping me create itself, the algorithm turning into my helpful thinking aid.... So yes, that's how my transhumanist vision becomes reality haha...

We start tiny and slow. But it works.

Furthermore, with all that I can also start to help other people maybe in the future. Neurodivergent people have to suffer far too much. And a large amount of that unnecessary suffering can be reduced by getting proper accomodations. But this even lacks due to autism being so badly understood, even by professionals. This is no blaming, but 'autism research' should NOT be about 'curing' autistic people(which is ableist bullshit! There is nothing to cure, other than ignorance and stigma of society), NO, it should be about understanding these phenomena well enough to offer and create the best accomodations and make life quality better for each individual and their very unique needs! THIS should be the point in autism research! To ensure the best accomodations to make life more life-worthy, to help us being integrated as FULL human being, and treated with respect and tolerance, with dignity. Not ableist middle ages-like propaganda which a lot of it seems to be...