book review for Clockwork Boys by T. Kingfisher
song: STFU! by Rina Sawayama https://open.qobuz.com/track/84075865
Whatever possessed Kingfisher when she was writing What Moves the Dead must have been exorcised out of her because how has every single book I've read since that has been trash?
The way the "romance" and/or lust is shoved down your throat. Chapter 4, I fucking quote "The sexual tension in the room kicked up several notches." said only because man + woman + man says he's not sworn to celibacy = sex. Thanks for telling me that because I couldn't see it lmao. (also no the hell it didn't…). The way that immediately after being saved by Caliban she suddenly wants to fuck him (and gets embarrassed when he rejects the advances, then gets mad when he explains that he didn't think she was in her right mind then.) Also, I put it out of my memory actually so fucking fast it should be studied. The main character, Slate, yk, literally thinks to herself… it pains me to type this… "raowr" when she sees Caliban after he's cleaned up. Girl…
The way that these assholes are in their goddamn THIRTIES!!!! and acting like high schoolers!? If I wanted to read stilted high school lovers, I'd go read that… these are full grown adults acting like this, which gave me so much second hand embarrassment even writing this review I still feel it.
None of the characters are likeable. Sometimes I want to give the benefit of the doubt and say, maybe they aren't supposed to be, but I shouldn't really do that every single time the characters are unlikeable lol.
Brenner is a jealous high schooler- I mean 30+ year old man who is still hung up on Slate, he also reads as incredibly edgy. Caliban is a jealous high schooler- I mean 30+ year old man who wants to fuck Slate after two weeks and they fight over her like 16 year olds. Slate is just… there. I guess. The more I think about it the more she seems like a blank….slate…. who also doesn't act like a… oh I've said it multiple times. Also the sexist kid, forgot his name. I clocked it immediately that he was going to be cool with Slate first page we see him. He's 19, and at least he actually does act his age LMAOOO
That's literally the only thing I can say about the book. Everything else is underwhelming and forgettable, and it doesn't help that this is a novella that is ONLY a set up for the second book. I sure hope it was the publisher who made such a dumbass decision and not Kingfisher, but wow that was a bad idea to separate them.