#clearingcobwebs

The explanation/invitation

I saw a thing while meandering on social media. It was free and it had to do with writing. It had to do with meditation. It combined meditation and writing and it was lightly guided, hassle and pressure free and so I decided to give it the old college try. I’m coming to terms with the fact that every day is in it’s own way day one.

Part Nil, The Mechanics:

guided breathing meditation 

poem/quote by Mary Oliver

Praying  it doesn’t have to be the blue iris,  it could be weeds in a vacant lot,  or a few small stones;  just pay attention,  then patch a few words together  and don’t try to make them elaborate,  this isn’t a contest  but the doorway into thanks,  and a silence in which another voice may speak.” ― Mary Oliver, Thirst

words to use as prompts or not at all

Few Elaborate Stone Iris Voice Doorway

Part I: the unedited freewrite

Stand back. Why do the words mean so much. Why do tears come earnestly to my sleep deprived eyes. Stand back in silence in order that another voice may come forward. It’s that. That’s it. The other voice that has stood in shadow, in silence. That voice, long silent, is being called to come forward. That’s the trigger. The other voice coming toward the page, the light, the center, the center, the stage, the center. The voice of the other. The one that stands behind that loves from a distance. I cannot smile though the voice leading this exercise asks for a smile to come forward. I cannot smile. It isn’t a time for smiling. It is a time for searching. In silence. In grief. In mourning. In giving over ourselves our selves our selves to that other voice, that voice that dream that thought that plan that we were told to hide away to stuff to silence to explain to ignore. Weren’t we watching in our lives in our escapes. Weren’t we seeing ourselves stand in the doorway. Block the doorway. Silencing that other voice. Normalizing, explaining, excusing. Excusing!! Excusing the noise, the blocks, the dark heavy figure barring the doorway, the voice, controlling the space. Controlling the expression. Asking it to validate itself. Mocking smiling joking. Everything passing through little cuts made in the dark. Little cuts and digs and silences like shovels heavy and hurtful blocking the doorway

Part II: Feedback/Reaction