a/n: im so freaked out i just saw a mista edit and i gripped my bedsheets. i need him carnally. with that in mind.. i got a little curious and in my itty bitty brain wondered who matches your freak :3
Joseph Joestar will match your freak, have you seen him?? I think it's one of those instances where you can say anything to him and he'll act shocked at first. But then he'll call you "naughty" and click his tongue at you, but he's giggling like a school girl.
Polnareff will match your freak but he also teeters between being scared and turned on at the same time. Like he'll stare at you bug-eyed and be like, "mon amie... you can't say things like that." But, like Joseph, he'll kick his feet.
Mista absolutely will match your freak, um.. because i said so! He will laugh at your advances, entertains them to the max and then he'll make a move himself. "wanna continue this in my room?" he'll ask with a smug grin. And he's lucky the others aren't around to flame him.
Jolyne is so into you and she seems like the type to playfully flirt with friends. But you take it a bit further and initiate it, she'll just match your energy. Eventually there will be some sexual tension until you say fuck it and make out.
Gyro is a TEASE! A TEASE i tell ya! First of all, he's always gonna have the last word. Second, he drags his jokes so far that I fear he nearly outmatches your freak. And he's not kidding either, no matter how smiley and giggly he is with his comments, he wants you bad and loves how vulgar you are.
Speedwagon is clutching his pearls. He'll have a heart attack hearing these words coming out of your mouth. Please, have some decorum he doesn't know if his heart can take anymore of your comments, he might just pass out. But you have him wrapped around your finger.
Erina will smile and laugh awkwardly, but shes terrified. Why would you say that?! And to her specifically, and on one end she's blushing like crazy but in the other she just wants to run away.
Doppio is scared, not because of what you said but what would the boss think? He isn't sure if he's able to control himself anyways, but in a way you kinda piqued his interest.
YES, but in the creepy weirdo way where its not fun anymore
Dio, Vanilla Ice, Mikitaka (he's just awkward lmao), Yuya , Prosciutto, Melone, Ghiaccio, Cioccolata (obviously), Anasui (he's still hawt), Gwess, Ungalo, Funny Valentine, Joshu, Toru
Dio entertains it, adds on to your comment but then he gets too freaked out that it scares you instead. He gets a kick out of making you feel uneasy because he's a piece of shit, he does it on purpose too.
Melone would act a bit scared first, but then he'd one up you and then he'd start talking about wanting to lick your stinky feet or whatever (no shame if you're into that) but sometimes it gets to a point.
Cioccolata is a freak in every aspect, this is so obvious and we all knows this. I think he scares you and you dont even have to do anything.
Anasui does match your freak and then he just takes it too far everytime but then regrets it when he'd see the look on your face change. He's uh... still trying to find a balance.
NO, you're the creepy weirdo LOL
William Zeppeli, Lisa Lisa, Kars, Wamuu, Santana, Jotaro, Avdol, N'doul, Rohan, Koichi, Kira, Abbacchio, Fugo, Trish, Diavolo, Risotto, Pucci, Rikiel, Donatello, Hot Pants, Sandman, Rai, Nijimura, Paco
Lisa Lisa is perplexed by your vulgarity and to be frank, she wants nothing to do with it nor would she want to entertain it. Thinks you're childish and would probably ignore you if you make any further advancements (if you're even alive by then). She is a lady, treat her with respect!
Kars would entertain your comment for a little bit before uttering how disgusting you are. You're lucky he didn't kill you right then and there, he has a lot of patience so you gotta play your cards right and maybe he'll play with you a little more.
Kira doesn't have time for your foolishness. Your vulgar words offend him and honestly he likes to pretend that you don't even exist to him, especially if you're coming on to him so strongly.
Diavolo is like a mix between Kars and Kira because he doesn't have time to entertain your comments. His patience is thin, you're unintentionally ragebaiting him but if you catch him on a good day, he might just give in instead of killing you.
Hot Pants wants nothing to do with you. She'll put you in your place and tell you to shut up. And you listen because whose gonna disobey Hot Pants of all people?
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
down with the sickness: cioccolata x fem! reader x secco
minors dni!
a/n: this isn't a request, but honestly i couldn't wait to post it. i started this piece at the laundromat in my notes app and finished it over a cocktail last night. anyways... enjoy, haha! (there may or may not be a part two to this, but i haven't decided.)
summary: visiting passione's doctor comes with some interesting consequences.
warnings: kind of dark content, pain kink, groping, medical play (?), blood & injuries, violence, probably incorrect medical terms & usage, typical creepiness from cioccolata & secco
word count: ~1.6k
“Someone was being reckless, I see.”
His words hang in the air alongside the stench of antiseptics. It was cold and clinical, much like a hospital was. But you didn’t get the luxury of going to a hospital. No, that would draw too many questions.
It was Tizzano and Squalo that suggested you come here, though it’s not like you had a choice. The bullet wound in your shoulder was deep, having torn through muscle and skin alike when the gun pointed at you ultimately fired. And while you had managed to stop most of the bleeding, it seemed wise to seek some kind of medical assistance.
If that’s what you could even call this.
Your legs dangle off the edge of the exam table table you’re seated on as Cioccolata circles you. He’s slow and deliberate with those aqua orbs never leaving you. Your lips part to respond, but the door swings open before you can utter the words.
Secco enters the mock operation room, pushing along a creaking medical cart. Your eyes instinctively flicker down towards the instruments as the light catches the metal tools lined up beside each other with a glint. There were forceps, scissors, and scalpels along with various other medical supplies that would no doubt be used in your treatment today.
Secco was watching you if not more intensely than Cioccolata was, fingers twitching against the cart before he slowed to a stop beside his master.
“Very good, Secco,” the green-haired man hums and turns away only briefly for his eyes to trail over the tools. He then turns back to you, hands clasping near his face with a wide grin tugging at the corners of his painted lips.
“Shall we begin?”
Secco moves wordlessly at Cioccolata’s side, fingers wrapping around something on the cart. It’s not until he raises the item to his face that you see what it is: a camera. The lens is pointed at your face with one of Secco’s purple orbs being hidden behind the camera while the other remains fixated on you.
Cioccolata must feel you stiffen at the sight of the camera because he directs that sickeningly sweet grin over at you now before it’s being hidden behind a mask.
“Don’t worry,” he chirps a little too cheerfully as he slides a pair of gloves onto his hands, the blue offering a stark comparison against his pale skin.
“It’s for a personal project of mine. You understand, don’t you?”
The man hums when you breathe out a ‘yeah’ in response, gaze lingering on a crack in the bare, concrete walls as Cioccolata steps closer.
“This, however, is going to have to go.”
You look down at where he gestures to your blood-stained shirt, not being able to help the heat that crawls across your cheeks.
“I’d rather not,” you speak softly, yet there’s a firmness in your voice as you shift in your spot on the table. Cioccolata watches you all the while, face no doubt still housing that grin like he knows something that you don’t. And the way Secco keeps the camera in his hands pointed on you has even more heat flooding your face.
“You want me to do my job effectively, don’t you?”
You suck in a breath and try to ignore the way your heart flutters wildly in your chest, a low sigh falling from your lips with your fingers hooking in the hem of your shirt. It’s then pulled over your head and dropped to the floor, the material crumpling in a damp pile.
Cioccolata’s eyes rake over your figure before he takes a step closer. You don’t flinch nor do you even move when Secco too moves closer out of the corner of your eye. The man in front of you hums and reaches out a gloved hand to you, and the breath hitches in your throat when his fingertips brush against your collarbone.
“This too.”
Two fingers pluck at your bra strap, giving a tug that has the strap snapping against your skin when it’s released. You finally reach behind yourself, fingers fiddling with the clasp of your bra until it comes undone.
It falls to the ground, and your nipples stiffen in the cool air. Cioccolata’s eyes drift lower, drinking in the sight of your bare torso before he’s ushering for you to lay back against the table. Goosebumps flood across your skin when your back meets the cold metal.
“Now we can begin.”
The bright, overhead lights sting your eyes as you squint up at him, eyes tracking his movements when he steps toward the cart. Secco remains silent, but he’s moved even closer with the lens of the camera now directed towards the bloody bullet wound at your shoulder. Cioccolata returns in your line of sight with a pair of forceps between his gloved fingers.
“There appears to be fragments remaining in the wound,” he says lowly, and you briefly wonder if he’s talking to the camera or you.
“They need to be removed for it to properly heal.”
The camera whirs as Secco zooms in when Cioccolata inches closer with the forceps, the instrument hovering dangerously close to the opening. It’s then that you realize that there’s no anesthetic, nor have you taken anything for the pain that’s been shooting through your arm ever since the bullet pierced your shoulder. Aqua eyes flicker towards your face and as if he can read your mind, he’s speaking up.
“I’m afraid that anesthesia isn’t an option.”
The camera is pointed back to your face, zooming in further as if drinking in every reaction.
“You don’t even need it for such a procedure as this.”
You had a sneaking suspicion that he was lying to you, especially when the forceps slipped into the hole in your shoulder. A sharp surge of pain shoots through your arm at the intrusion, and your eyes scrunch closed in response. You swear that you can feel every movement, every nudge of the metal prongs against the exposed tissue and muscle as it digs further in. You bite your bottom lip, and a familiar metallic tang settles on your tongue.
You don’t dare utter a sound, not even a peep under their watchful gazes. A small clink has your eyelids fluttering open, gaze finding the piece of shrapnel that now sits in the bowl at your side. You instinctively try to sit up, but a gloved hand presses against your injured shoulder - palm brushing directly over the skin.
That causes you to wince with a cry of pain falling from your parted lips when you’re pressed against the cold surface again. You suck in a breath through clenched teeth, yet the pressure doesn’t move. Cioccolata’s hand remains there, and he finally pulls it away after a long moment despite how his fingers still dance along the skin with a forefinger tracing the edges of the wound.
You shudder at that, breasts rising and falling with a labored breath as your half-lidded orbs meet Cioccolata’s. There’s a hungry look in his eyes as he leans in again with the forceps.
“We’re not done yet,” he breathes out with a low chuckle and leans in closer to you as the camera is in your face again. The forceps are forced back into the wound and this time, you let out a strangled groan in response.
Secco lets out a muffled giggle, almost as if he can’t contain his excitement when Ciocclata digs another fragment out of your shoulder.
Your head is spinning now, ears ringing loudly as you swear that you can feel your heart leap into your throat. There’s another clink with yet another piece landing in the bowl. Cioccolata’s other hand dances along your ribs, nitrile fingers dragging upward. Slowly and surely, as if he were counting every single one that lay hidden beneath your flesh.
He’s watching you.
They’re both watching you with eyes that devour every flinch and reaction with the camera being only a testament to your treatment. A jolt wracks your limbs when Cioccolata cups one of your breasts, yet you refuse to open your eyes.
“Pain and pleasure…”
He’s speaking again, but the words just barely reach your ears when he harshly presses on the bullet wound again. You gasp, eyes flying open as you try to pull away from the table and the pain.
But that only makes Cioccolata press harder. His other hand remains at your breast, now stroking and circling your nipple while the other hand continues to apply more pressure to your shoulder. It’s dizzying. The sensation of the burning throughout your arm that sets your nerves alight, but there was also the stimulation at your breasts as he palms and kneads the fatty tissue.
Secco takes a breath, and the purple orb that’s not behind the camera moves wildly across your form.
“They often meld together, yes?”
His eyes flicker towards your face before he pulls away all together. The attention is on the cart now as he fiddles with something icy suddenly being placed just above your breast. It’s a stethoscope, you realize dimly - still reeling from his ministrations.
Cioccolata lets out a pleased hum at the sound of your racing heart filling his ears before pulling the equipment away.
“Just like they are now,” he concludes while peeling the gloves from his hands. You find yourself releasing the breath you were holding as Secco takes a step backwards alongside Cioccolata, but the camera is still filming your trembling body.
“It will heal. Simply wash it daily.”
You slowly sit up even despite that pain in your shoulder, and you swear that you can still feel Cioccolata’s touch lingering on your body. The camera is returned to the cart as Secco begins to push it out of the room, but there’s a final glance thrown your way over Cioccolata’s shoulder. He tugs his mask down, grinning wolfishly all the while.
Hello there! Very excited that your reqs are open again hehe
If possible, could I maybe get some headcanons for Cioccolata & Secco with a reader who has the personality of a golden retriever? Like they’re super friendly and energetic and affectionate and stuff :3
Take your time and take care! ^^
hii! of course! thank you for requesting and you take care as well <33333
You are the ONLY source of genuine warmth in their entire lives and it shows immediately. The contrast is insane. You’re all smiles and “hi hi hi!! :D” and they’re… those two.
From the moment you meet Cioccolata, he clocks you instantly. Not stupid, just… soft. Open. Eager. The kind of person that wants approval. And that? Oh he loves that.
Meanwhile Secco is immediately obsessed. Full on puppy imprinting. Once he got the OK from Cioccolata, he follows you everywhere like you adopted him.
You’re all smiles, bouncing around, talking a mile a minute, touching Cioccolata’s arm, laughing like he’s normal, and he’s just watching you like he’s already decided something about you.
“You’re very affectionate,” he says, tilting his head.
And you’re just like, “Yeah! I like people :D”
That’s when he decides- you’re the type that thrives under attention.
Which means… you’re very easy to guide.
If Cioccolata approves of you, Secco adores you. If Cioccolata claims you? Secco sees you as part of them.
You’re naturally affectionate, hugging them, leaning on them, holding onto their sleeves, and instead of being confused, Cioccolata encourages it.
Not gently. Not sweetly. More like: “Come here.” “Stay.” “Good.”
And you don’t even realize how quickly you start responding to it.
He praises you, but it’s controlled. Intentional. “That’s it. Just like that.” “You listen so well, don’t you?”
You light up under his attention. Like visibly. You start seeking it out without realizing. Glancing at him for approval, waiting for that small nod, that faint smile. He notices every single time.
Secco doesn’t command you like Cioccolata does, but he’s clingy. If Cioccolata says “come here,” Secco is already pulling you closer.
If Cioccolata praises you, Secco gets excited too, like you did something good for all of them.
You call them cute sometimes, because you literally cannot help yourself. Secco is absolutely thriving. You call him cute and he’s practically vibrating.
You hover near Cioccolata before hugging him, and he’ll either:
Pull you in suddenly
Or make you wait just a second longer than necessary
He likes how reactive you are. The way you perk up when he acknowledges you. The way you soften when he praises you. The way you get just a little quieter when he’s serious. You’re expressive, easy to read, and he uses that.
Secco, meanwhile, treats you like something precious but also his. He’ll cling to your side, rest against you, follow you around.
If someone else tries to get too close, there’s gonna be immediate tension. He doesn’t like sharing your attention with anyone other than Cioccolata.
You’re still super friendly with others, because that’s just who you are. Cioccolata finds that… irritating.
Not outwardly at first. But you’ll notice his tone gets sharper. His attention on you gets more intense afterward. He’ll call you back over with that quiet “Come here.” He’s reminding you where your attention should be.
Secco gets more openly jealous. Tugging at you, pulling you back, making small noises until you refocus on him. If you pet his head or reassure him, he calms down instantly.
Cioccolata doesn’t get loud about jealousy. He just… removes the problem. Or redirects you so smoothly you don’t even realize what happened.
You bring them little gifts still, snacks, trinkets, random cute things. Secco treasures them like gold. Cioccolata accepts them with a faint smile and a quiet, “How thoughtful.”
And you feel SO proud when he says that.
You’re very “I love you guys!!” energy. Secco takes it literally and immediately. Cioccolata coos at you, and he’s also filing that away for later.
Secco ends up acting like your guard dog. Always close, always watching, always reacting to your mood. If you’re happy? He’s calmer. If you’re upset? He’s restless, agitated.
They’ve both become completely attached to you in their own ways: Secco: emotionally dependent, clingy, protective Cioccolata: possessive, fascinated, in control
You are quite literally the only soft thing in their world.
Reader is a sweet nurse who’s always kind to her patients and is well regarded by everyone. What they don’t know is that you’re actually just as much of a monster as Cioccolata and Secco.
Behind your warm smile is a twisted mind that believes in killing patients because according to your messed up ideology, death is the only true saving medicine that frees the sick and injured from pain. Thus it’s your job to “help them” by giving them their deaths faster. You’ve strangled, poisoned, drowned, and stabbed so many patients that you lost count.
Cioccolata became deeply fascinated by your views and encouraged it by having you work under him and assist with his killings. You look out for the weakest patients who are closest to death and then bring them to him for his torture films. You were initially against of prolonged torture but then realized they’re gonna die anyways, and they’re already in pain. So what’s the difference. “Think of it as a ceremony before death” says Cioccolata.
Secco was jealous of you at first for taking Cioccolata’s attention, but soon grew to like you as you were always so nice to him and would bring him all kinds of sweet sugary treats. You never talked down to him and instead treated him like an equal and he came to respect you and soon grow a crush on you.
Eventually you three became a serial killer trio. The most terrifying poly couple ever.
You’re such a wonderful help to Cioccolata since your non-threatening presence easily lures in potential victims. He always praises you for your work, making you blush.
He absolutely loves teasing you since you’re so easy to fluster. Who knew for a deranged killer, you could still be so cute?
It doesn’t help how freakishly tall Cioccolata is compared to you, making you look like a pretty doll to him. His cute little nurse! He could just squish those rosy cheeks till he rips them right off!!
Cioccolata and Secco got a lot of cuteness aggression for you.
You have a very soft comforting voice, yet say a lot of disturbing things with it.
Secco always messily licks and kisses your face and pounces on you to snuggle. You love kissing him back and giving him so many hugs. He loves it so much when you praise him.
You ask him where Cioccolata and both look for him together while holding hands. You both like to follow him a lot.
You’ve starred in a lot of his “films” as his helpful assistant while Secco is the handy camera man. You made a lot of fun memories together.
You’re most likely a stand user with a messed up stand like them. Maybe your stand looks like a cute little stuffed bear or some other doll but becomes a horrifying demon-like thing.
You’re not opposed to torturing those who get in your way or when ordered to by the boss. You can easily drop the mask and show them why your Cioccolata’s most favored nurse
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Prompt: You knew it was an awful idea, but you couldn’t help but wish for your family to at least meet the man you were with. It had felt like something you had to do at the time, and now you were regretting it-of COURSE bringing a man from the mafia home wasn’t smart-
Reader is NOT a part of Passione, but is aware they are.
Warnings: Unhealthy relationships, characters are jerks, reader does not want to be in a relationship with Melone in his part, discussion of marriage and pressure to get married, canon typical aggressive and murderous behavior (mainly Cioccolata and Diavolo), death
Characters: all of La Squadra (no Sorbet and Gelato), Cioccolata (I’m sorry he’s just so funny) Diavolo (yeah it goes about as well as you’d expect lol)
“Come back to me a while
Change your taste in men”
Formaggio: Meet your parents? Welllll…okay, he’ll do it without too much complaint if it gets you to stop nagging him. He’s not that interested in such things, hell he probably doesn’t think your relationship is even that serious yet. But if you really want to drag him to your parents’ place for some formality’s sake? Fine, but don’t expect a ring or something just because he met your folks.
Honestly…….he’s not the WORST man you could’ve brought home. On the surface, at least.
You begged him not to mention the whole “assassin of a large Italian mafia” thing. He gave you a thumbs up and a smug smirk that made you think he was going to mention it just because you told him not to.
But he has his own type of charisma, immediately friendly with your parents. He’s much too casual given the circumstances, but he’s been like that for as long as you’ve known him. And he DOES end up mentioning the “assassin of a large Italian mafia” thing when they asked what he did for a living, and he even had the audacity to wink at you after your parents laughed it off, assuming it was just a joke. UGH. He LOVED messing with you. He says he’s actually a vet tech. You have to hold yourself back from laughing out loud, remembering a few occasions where you had to liberate his poor cat from a jar or a cupboard or any other weird tiny place he found he could put it.
Well, at least your parents are convinced you got yourself a decent guy. He performed a little TOO well though. Now they’re constantly asking you about how you and Formaggio are doing, when you guys are gonna visit again, stuff like that. And at first he’s super smug about it; your parents liking him is GREAT for him because he can get stuff out of them, especially when he turns on the charm.
But that backfires on him. It doesn’t take too long before they’re asking him when he’s gonna pop the question, and he knows if he answers truthfully (he doesn’t plan on proposing. Ever.), suddenly his standing with you and your parents isn’t gonna look so good.
You wonder what’s got him in such a bad mood when he shows up at your apartment. He tells you he doesn’t want to talk to your parents as often anymore, and his unusually irritable tone makes you hesitate to ask what the hell happened with your parents.
“And quit telling them stuff about how we’re gonna get hitched, it’s NOT happening, sweetheart.”
Um…
He doesn’t usually talk THAT harshly towards you, and you don’t even know what he’s referring to.
You haven’t said anything to them about that. You let it go though. He just needs to cool off.
Illuso: Your arrogant jerk of a boyfriend loves to hear you suggest he meets your parents. It’s a huge ego boost for him. You want him to put a ring on it that badly, eh? You like him that much?Alright, alright, he can make some time for that~he’s not opposed to the idea, though you shouldn’t actually expect much immediate change in your relationship even if meeting your folks goes well.
Your parents aren’t sure what to think of your man…they want to take his smug narcissistic mannerisms as a joke but he actually seems serious.
And just something about how he pulls you to his side like he owns you rubs them the wrong way. He doesn’t seem to take you that seriously either, often dismissing what you say. He clearly wants to be in charge of your relationship, and it’s making him come off as a bully. And you seem used to it.
You know him. He’s just trying to show off. And yeah he’s never been the Best boyfriend to you, but he acts especially jerky when you’re around other people in an attempt to seem more confident and secure in his relationship.
He would be much better off being honest with himself instead of putting on these acts that just result in him looking like a crappy boyfriend. He lives up to his name, you suppose.
You say he completely embarrassed himself and you in front of your parents.
He pretends to dismiss it.
But it starts Really bothering him. And he’s got too much pride to ask you what you mean so…he’ll just let it keep him up at night.
Prosciutto: Internally he actually would like the approval of your father before he married you. But he acts disinterested and defiant towards the idea. Though if you really insist then PERHAPS he could find some space in his busy schedule to visit your dad with you.
“Try to be nice,” you requested of him as you buttoned up the rest of his shirt for him so he’d be presentable.
“I AM nice,” he grumbles back, and you can’t resist laughing out loud. Ok, sure. But seriously, be nice.
It’s bizarre to see him trying to be his version of polite, because his version of polite is to just be quiet. It’s a bit funny, he really doesn’t have anything nice to say so he’ll just not say anything at all. You have to make an active effort to not laugh at him this evening.
It goes alright since he only responds when specifically spoken to, so at worst your dad just thinks your boyfriend is boring. If you like him, whatever, your dad is fine with it. But don’t come crying to him when your lame ass boyfriend is driving you insane.
Prosciutto seems mildly pleased with himself when the two of you leave, since he got your father’s seal of approval. And you don’t know what to say when he asks you if your dad liked him (while pretending not to care in typical Prosciutto fashion).
You tell him he did just fine. As long as he remains careful about how he speaks to you around his dad, there probably won’t be any issues.
Pesci: Yeah Pesci has the common sense to think meeting your parents is not the greatest idea. What part about assassin in the mafia sounds like something they’d like?? You’re like it’s fine, just lie!
Well. Okay but. How well is that gonna work in the long run…?
You say don’t worry about it, you’ll figure it out together if it ever becomes a problem. And when you take his hands and plead with him he can’t bring himself to deny you, even though he thinks it’s a bad idea.
You know Pesci’s disposition won’t betray your deception; you know the last thing they’d think was that Pesci was actually bad news. Maybe a bit of a pushover, but definitely not dangerous.
Your parents are very convinced that he’s just some fisherman you happened upon and formed a bond with. And he seems sweet enough. A little shy, but nice.
Oh you’re so happy, your parents finally approve of a boyfriend you’ve brought home, and ironically they don’t know he’s probably THE baddest boy you’ve ever brought to them.
You kiss his shoulder on the way out the door, and he wants to know why you’re laughing so much.
You say nothing, just thinking the whole thing is funny.
Melone: It’s Melone’s suggestion that he meets your parents. You’re not so sure, worried he was going to humiliate both of you in front of your parents, and worried he was planning on proposing to you.
Yeah you liked him a lot but…honestly you felt like this relationship just wasn’t working out. He was too…eccentric. Too unpredictable. You wanted something at least somewhat stable and Melone was absolutely not going to give that to you with his disposition and line of work. And yet, you’re clinging on to him anyways, since he’s the boyfriend you’ve had for the longest, and you’re admittedly curious to see what would happen if you brought him to meet your parents.
He won’t provide for you. You know your parents are going to think the same thing….among…other things…about your eccentric boyfriend.
And sure enough…
Your parents are dragging you into the kitchen wondering where you found such a sick pervert. You didn’t really think a guy like that was gonna make you happy, did you? And he didn’t even make good money? Sheesh. Please do better. Find literally anyone else. Please. You don’t want to deal with it, but they have a point that you should stop leading him on and just break up with him.
Melone thought it went great because he tends to hear what he wants to hear. And now he’s wrapping his arm a little too low down your body, confidently telling you you’ll love the ring he picked out for you~
Good freaking grief, what a mess-
Ghiaccio: He knows he Should just go along with it and finally meet your parents, but he Really doesn’t want to. Doing that means you might expect him to marry you, or spend time with your family; two things he does Not want to do, at least right now.
But ok. He’ll remind you that you’re one of the few people who know him well, so if you think it’ll be alright…then fine. He’ll trust you.
Honestly, no matter how well you thought you knew him, you could never tell what exactly was going to set him off. But you were sure your parents could easily say something that could drive him insane…and you knew it’d look really, Really bad if you told your parents to mind what they said around your boyfriend because he had severe anger issues…
Yeah, he does come off as a bad boyfriend, with the way he holds your hand or wrist way too tight and guides you around, or always seems on the verge of screaming at you, and tapping his foot in irritation when he’s otherwise holding still.
He refrains from actually losing it, but you know he found the whole thing annoying from the way he sped home, practically breaking the steering wheel from his tight grip.
He does NOT wanna talk about it, he doesn’t wanna hear what your parents thought because he Knows it wasn’t good and you better not think this’ll change anything in your relationship drastically. You don’t want to open up that conversation with him, so you stay quiet. Stressing him out further is literally the last thing you want to do.
Risotto Nero: He can’t believe you’re actually serious about him meeting your mother. He’s not exactly a gentle man, both in appearances and personality. But if you really want him to, then it’s not a big deal to him, but he wants to make sure you know it’s not gonna go so well.
He’s calm and capable of holding a conversation, but still. LOOK at him. He’s not the traditional definition of boyfriend-
Your mother is initially very frightened by his appearance, understandably so, but he just tries to have a conversation like a normal person and Yeah he’s pretty stoic but…he seems ok. He certainly took the time to get to know you. He understands you well. He’s surprisingly aware of your mood, able to tell when something’s bothering you or making you uncomfortable even when you’re not being obvious about it. He’s not particularly affectionate or sweet, very blunt when he asks you: “what is it?” when you seem unhappy, but his intentions aren’t to sound mean or impatient. It’s just how he talks.
Once your mom realizes that, she thinks he’s a sweet enough man.
Risotto honestly hasn’t ever had to think about visiting a partner’s parent, so he just doesn’t mention it after that. Though he’s not entirely opposed to seeing her again, he would like to remind you that he Is the leader of an assassination squadron, and your sweet mother would probably not be happy to find out about that.
Just keep it in mind, please: he’s no longer suited for such social activities, no matter how much he pretends for your sake.
Cioccolata: SHEESH. You canNOT be serious. He looks at you like ?????? Really???? He’s not exactly. Welcome in society anymore. And there’s no way you’re not aware of that, right???? Well you don’t Really care but for tradition’s sake you wanted to do this. Didn’t matter what your family thought, but you felt the need to get it over with. And well…he’s surprisingly not opposed to marrying you if that’s what you really want. You already live together, beyond Secco you’re literally the only person who can stomach being near him for more than five minutes, and he’s wealthy enough to easily afford a ring for you. If you don’t make it a big deal then what the hell, sure; he’ll marry you.
You knew bringing him to meet your family was gonna go super well because that morning started with an argument after you told him to not bring Secco along.
And when you do eventually get Cioccolata to your parents’ home…yeah. When you said he was a“surgeon” they were expecting something. Different. Very convenient you left out the “former” part of that description.
He makes them incredibly uncomfortable, and it’s not long before he’s being asked to leave and never interact with you again.
You’ve gotten used to Cioccolata’s insanely sadistic personality, but even you felt a shiver of disgust when he passed you a chilling smile that was asking for your permission for him to hurt your family. You knew he’d do it anyways if you don’t intervene, so after an extraordinarily uncomfortable half hour you’re dragging your terrifying boyfriend out the door, already accepting you’d probably not be talking to your family again anytime soon.
Yeah they’re definitely gonna think you’re dead. And that was the Tame version of Cioccolata they saw-you haven’t been able to mellow his personality out at all, but you pride yourself on your ability to get him to behave himself…to a degree.
But now that that’s over with, you really wanted that ring. You really must’ve become desensitized to him at this point, with the way you clung to his arm as the two of you left, whining and nagging him to finally marry you because you’ve been dating for so long and he still hasn’t proposed-
Same guy who killed people literally just for his own pleasure-
He brushes you off like you were just begging him for money again, assuring you he’d get you a ring when he found the time for it. Keep nagging him and you might actually get your wish this time.
Diavolo: Such a sweet, naive thing…he’s really hit the jackpot with you. You really wanted him to meet your family? Have you not been paying attention? He doesn’t want to be known by anyone…but you thought that maybe your family would be an exception…And with how passive and even eager he seemed to meet your family, you honestly thought you were right.
You’re not surprised when Doppio ends up being the one meeting your family instead. But it works out well. Doppio is a hit with your family, he seems sweet and reasonable, and his clumsiness was endearing in a way.
You’re glad it all went well, not thinking anything of the evening.
But you had given Diavolo your parents’ address, and through that, access to their names, and the names of anyone else in your family if he did just a bit of research…
Your anonymity is just as important to him as his own if you’re to be in a relationship. You can’t have a family, you’ll only need him on the path you two are taking.
Act out all you want if you’re upset when your entire family disappears in a matter of days, if you decide you want to back out on him now he’ll just send you to join them. Even if you were an enjoyable companion, if you put his identity at risk he’s not gonna let you walk away.
-
Title is from the song “Taste in Men” by Placebo
Hmmmmm need to actually do a full fic sometime…I still have something in the works for Diavolo but I need to put it all together lol. Finally doing that thing where you just write what you have ideas for, and then work on the other parts later and honestly it’s been working great, would recommend.
Super inconsistent lengths again lol someday I will figure out consistency-
i need everyone that writes to write Seccolata x reader please i want to be with BOTH OF THEM AT THE SAME TIME NOT JUST ONE OR THE OTHER.. god.. is this just too much to ask..
🍋 I’m back to throw my requests in your face >:3c I’ve been watching golden wind and I may or mayyy have not seen you really like secco and cioccolata when you got asked about your favorites..heh 😎
Sfw or nsfw id love it if you came up with some x gn!reader head-canons for them both!! ^_^ separately 💔 (secco freaks me out but my friend loves him) thank you again :D 🍊
I do really like them, idk why though 😭, Of course!! I hope you enjoy!!!
Secco:
Protective Side: Despite his chaotic personality, he’s extremely protective of you. If someone messes with you, he’s the first to act, though in his own bizarre, panicked way.
Odd Affection: Secco expresses care in strange, roundabout ways, like carrying your things, “accidentally” blocking people from bumping into you, or giving you weird little nicknames.
Clueless Flirting: He tries to flirt but it comes out hilariously awkward. “Y-you’re… uh… scary, in a good way… and I like it…”
Jealousy Quirks: If another person gets too close, he panics. Not violent, just… flailing and defensive, muttering under his breath while glaring at them.
Comfort Moments: Secco actually becomes a little softer around you. If you’re upset, he might awkwardly rest his hand on your shoulder or wrap an arm around you like a weird, protective bear.
Training Partner: He loves showing off his Stand and teaching you tricks, turning chaotic combat into bonding moments.
Cioccolata:
Obsession Level 100: He’s absolutely fixated on you. He’s drawn to everything you do, even the mundane, and expresses it in a creepy-cute way.
Over-the-Top Attention: Buys you extravagant gifts “just because” or spends hours explaining something you mildly like in excruciating detail.
Playful Taunts: He flirts through teasing, like pretending he’s judging your taste in food or books, but in a way that draws you in.
Dangerous Charm: Even in everyday situations, there’s this thrilling edge around him, you’re never fully sure what he might do, but he frames it as affection.
Affectionate Gestures: Likes to hover near you, leaning in slightly when he talks, or brushing hair from your face with a deliberate slow motion.
Protective/Obsessive: He freaks out if someone else shows interest in you, making it obvious he “owns” your attention in the most unnerving way.
