Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
ā Live Streamingā Interactive Chatā Private Showsā HD Qualityā Free Actions
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
An analysis and opinion on the current state of fandom and pop culture.
In a world where few feel safe in their day-to-day lives, weāve tried to carve out this safety onlineāweāve learned that our experiences online are up to us, that itās our job to follow, block, ignore, and engage with all the ārightā and āwrongā materials that will give us the perfect feed. The perfect, safest experience. The cleanest dash ecosystem. You donāt have to see or hear from anyone you donāt want to online, especially here on tumblr, and especially in fandom spaces.
And I do still believe itās good to curate your experience onlineāto not seek out material or people you actively hate. You wouldnāt (hopefully) do that in person, so you shouldnāt do it online.
But that does lead me to my next point: itās impossible to create a fully āsafeā space in person. And I donāt believe we should have them online, either.
Actually, I think even the language around āsafe spacesā bothers me a little. Originally, I believe the term āsafe spacesā came from the late 60s/early 70s LGBTQ and feminist movements, where they labeled gay bars or places as āsafe spacesā to be themselves in a world that ordinarily rejected, abused, or killed them for who they are. They carved out a tiny slice of the universe that would allow them to be themselves for just a an evening, a moment in time. Of course, it still meant anyone could show up in most cases. Perhaps there was some precautions put in place to try and weed out bigots or danger, but for the most part, anyone was welcome.
The term āsafe spaceā like many other phrases on the internet that were once apart of civil rights, activist, or social theory has now been mutated, transformed, and I believe, has come to die.
Or perhaps, should die. We should kill it.
(And before anyone jumps at meāI do still believe in the importance of āsafe spacesā in its original form. I do believe itās important for marginalized people to have real, in-person, safe spaces to be in whether to just exist, connect with other members of their community, celebrate, etc. I believe it is an okay thing to have some of this on the internet too.)
Now, carving out a āsafe spaceā on the internet and especially in fandom means to immediately block anyone that doesnāt make you feel incredible, have all the exact same opinions as you, and never once ruffles your feathers. It means to never see a gif of that ship you hate or artwork you find distasteful. It means taking everything personally and being sensitive and hypervigilant. And breaking friendships and mutuals quickly, over very, very small things. It means never being able to debate or have conversations of analysis. It means to never disagree, to never step outside of your own perspective.
It means to become hyper-individualistic. To create your own, tiny, fragile world. And if anyone or anything disturbs that in any way, you annihilate it immediately. You have no tolerance for anything other than something that gives you immense joy, satisfaction, and reassures your view of life or fandom. (My partner calls this āsugar in your mouth all the timeā and what they mean is you always want sweets, but to feel better, to be healthy, you need vegetables, too.)
Creating a safe space now means losing community and only tolerating, engaging, and encouraging people who bolster you specifically. And yes, you may bolster them in return, but it becomes transactional. Warped. It is all only ever about you. And how you feel. And how that person or people or community makes you feel.
I think this is why weāve seen an uptick in intolerance for differing opinions in fandom spaces (or online spaces in general). No one is allowed to disagree with each otherāyou should block and move on. If you do disagree with an opinion, that person assumes you think theyāre an evil, awful idiot and becomes defensive. Or now youāre starting drama. Thereās an inability to add to discussions. Or jump off of each other. Or to disagree in a way that isnāt mean-spirited or condescending. In college, during discussion based literature classes, I was allowed to disagree with my classmates on the text and we rarely got heated or upset with each other. Occasionally, of course, there were personal topics that sparked larger emotions or a misstep, itās always possible.
But no one was ever unsafe.
Which is why I dislike the phrase āsafe spaceā on the internet, in the modern era.
Youāre not in danger, youāre just uncomfortable.
On a more specific level, I think this is also why thereās been such an uptick in selfshipping in our corner of fandom. Weāve curated our spaces so far that it truly is just about the individual and their individual self ship. Gone are the days of sharing and connectingāunless youāre willing to engage with someoneās selfship, they will not engage with yours. It leaves us all to play dolls separately, rather than together. Thereās been a decline in fics, especially longer ones. Thereās been a decline in just general content. Now everything is individualistic. Tailored so specifically to you and only you, that it sorta leaves you isolated.
Or leaves many members of the community isolated.
Itās become fractured and lonely. Uninspiring and an echo chamber of voices that all, always, agree and love and play and talk and adore each other, by themselves.
It leaves no room for difference, uniqueness, community, or even creativity. It leaves no room for discomfort. It leaves no room to learn how to regulate yourself over something small, like a differing opinion or someone else who enjoys that same character, differently. Itās crucial that you know how to let things roll off of you in order to be in community with each other.
Community has disagreements, it has diversity of thought and art and personhood. That is a good thing. Itās possible to disagree with someone and still maintain respect, kindness, and even curiosity for them.
Beyond that, the internet, no matter how much tailoring you do, is never just for you. If you post an opinion on your blog, someone is allowed to disagree or add to that and it doesnāt always mean theyāre trying to destroy and kill you mentally. And beyond this, fandom is not just for you. Fandom has always been about community. And community should not all look, talk, act, think, and agree exactly like you.
This is dangerous and indicative of grander socio-political trends in our world and capitalism. But that conversation is for another day.
I say all of this mostly to get my opinions on the matter outāand to perhaps change minds or get people thinking. I want us to be reflective on our spaces and on ourselves. If you enjoy being in fandom spaces, it may be good to reflect on why! I think part of the reason I havenāt enjoyed it as recently is because of this hyper individualistic trend. I always enjoyed fandom as a community and place to discuss analysis, art, writing, and The Characters, together. And that just doesnāt feel as possible anymore in the xreader world that I currently live in.
Feel free to disagree with me or raise different points or thoughts, promise it wonāt make the space unsafe.
saw a staged reading/singing of a brand new very absurd and outrageous and unabashedly queer western musical. and there was a talk back after. and a girl raised her hand and started with āiām 17 and iām trying not to be mean butā¦ā
and proceeded to talk about how she ādidnāt learn anythingā from this bc apparently everyone her age knows everything ab the queer community. and also said that clearly this musical is āfor people 25 and upā bc of the raunchiness. it was CRAZY. it was totally online puritan talking points that she was regurgitating. just crazy.
unfort i do think itās a little hot if you and your ābest friendā have all this tension and lowkey ruin each others romantic relationships and prospects
there is something v hot to me about a character that you slap and their head cracks to the side and their first reaction is to then smirk or smileā¦,
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
ā Live Streamingā Interactive Chatā Private Showsā HD Qualityā Free Actions
Free to watch ⢠No registration required ⢠HD streaming
character duos that are the bullet and the gun. the attack dog and the master. the sword and the hand. the fire and the match. the axe and the executioner.