#chap 15

"I bet you would even get back with her if she asked you too! You have no backbone, Guk! You don't even understand how absolutely wrong she is for this!"

The tallest is right in that sense, if you just called Guk or texted him he would go running to you wherever you are. Somehow your ex-boyfriend feels as if this isn't real.

You wouldn't push him away like this, you wouldn't leave him alone without any explanation if you weren't frightened. The doctor must have told you something awful. Maybe you can't face reality, yet. Or maybe you don't want to face it because then whatever it is might become real.

"What're you gonna do, Gukkie? You can't stay in this apartment forever staring at your phone," Jimin asks with a soft, soothing voice.

The escort continues to stare at his coffee table and simply shrugs when Chim crouches before him making eye contact.

"God, I can't believe the women you pick," Tae guffaws, folding his arms once more.

Jeongguk feels like a mere shell at this point, every step he takes feels like he's crawling farther and farther away from you.

He can barely even think anymore, his thoughts are always solely on you. When they're not on you, he thinks about what he's done wrong.

It's been two weeks since you blocked him from you. Everyday feels like it's longer than the last.

He wishes he would have told you how much he loves you instead of whispering it in the dead of night while you slept. Maybe if he told you how much you mean to him, you would have been brave enough to not push him away. Jimin constantly tells him to stop dwelling on it but it seems almost impossible.

"You have a job," Jimin announces, busting through the apartment door.

"What?" the escort hisses, lifting his head lazily off of the couch.

"You have a job," his best friend enunciates, throwing a pair of black jeans that are piled up on the floor at his head.

If you were to see the state of your ex-boyfriend's apartment right now, you would drop dead. It's quite simply a mess.

"I didn't take a job. So no, I don't," Guk hisses, tossing the jeans off of his thigh with a rough hand.

"Applehyme wants you and only you. And me being the great guy I am told her that you'd do it so here we are. Now get dressed, you gotta be there in thirty minutes."

The escort lets his eyes flutter closed and he can't think of anything else but wanting his couch to swallow him whole. Even Hawking is staring at him with curious, sad eyes and it rips through his limbs like butter.

Applehyme only goes to one restaurant and as annoying and crude as she is… Namjoon also goes to that restaurant to get you food.

Maybe if Guk goes, he'll see your coworker. And if he sees your coworker, he can hound him to fess up what's going on with you.

As all of this works itself out in his brain, he stands up in a flash.

"Thirty minutes?" he inquires, heading off to the bathroom.

"Thirty," Chim agrees, throwing himself down on the couch.

Jeongguk finds these restaurants way too dim. It's almost as if everyone is sticking to the shadows around him while he sits at a brightly lit table with older women swarming him like some kind of plague.

He has to squint just to see ten feet from the table but the prospect of seeing Namjoon is too hard to miss.

He takes the thigh touching with a grain of salt. Miranda Applehyme seems to never keep her hands to herself but when she's paying such an exorbitant amount to do it… he never complained.

"You've missed a few of our luncheons, Jeongguk. We were wondering when we would see you again," one of the fellowship announces.

The escort has never paid attention to any of these women's names and he's not about to start now.

"Oh… Yeah," he breathes, sitting up straighter when the doors open, "I've been busy."

These women are very bad at understanding social cues, especially when they feel like they're above everyone else. They don't understand that Guk couldn't give a bigger fuck and they really can't understand that he isn't paying a lick of attention.

Your ex physically deflates when the person that enters isn't Namjoon and he shakes his head minutely at the disappointment of it all.

It was a small chance to see him and an even smaller chance to get him to talk but he had to take it.

He needs to understand what's going on.

With a sigh, he turns his attention back to his now cold plate of food and he pushes the chicken around with his fork like a child.

"Are you alright?" Miranda inquires, pushing her bangs softly away from her eyes.

"Yeah… I'm fine," he whispers, giving her a polite smile.

The afternoon with the mothball fellowship felt longer than most days and when it's finally over the escort takes a large relieving breath.

He holds open the car door for Miranda as she climbs into her Bentley and with a sullen smile, he politely nods to her.

It isn't even two seconds later when a nice, posh car rolls into the lot and as Mrs. Applehyme opens her mouth to speak, Guk slams the door shut.

Namjoon slowly makes his way out of his car in a nicely pressed three piece suit and your ex practically fumbles his own feet as he advances at your coworker.

"Oh God," Joon whines, catching sight of the man before him.

"Explain!" Guk snaps, grabbing at the lapels of his suit.

Jeongguk isn't the only one with muscle and within a second your coworker barrels towards hjm and shoves him up against the side of the restaurant with narrowed eyes.

"Listen to me, she does not want to see you. Do you understand me? She does not want to speak to you. Leave her alone."

The words are like bullets to your ex and he seemingly slumps, almost limply, within Namjoon's grasp. When your coworker promised he'd get to the bottom of this. Guk stupidly assumed the taller blonde man would just fix everything but that's clearly not the case.

Joon pulls away sharply, fixing his suit with a huff.

"Well… wh-what's wrong with her?" Guk inquires softly, running his hands over his face.

Your coworker sighs loudly, having to look away from the man he's broken with such few words. He wants to tell him so badly but… he promised you. "She's not dying, I can tell you that much."

The escort's eyes flutter shut and Joon takes a step away to look at your ex in his entirety. He's fucking messy, although he's masking it well, the bags under his eyes tell it all.

Joon has loved you for so many years, longer than this fucking guy but he's not the one you need right now. He knows that.

You find very little comfort in his presence and you don't speak to him or anyone to try and shut the world away.

"Let's get a drink, c'mon," Namjoon sighs, heading toward the restaurant and pocketing his hands.

"A drink?!" the escort guffaws, widening his eyes as he watches the blonde man walk away.

"That's what I explicitly said. Yes."

The restaurant's bar is posh and completely filled with well off business men that have little care for anything in the entire world.

With a sigh, Guk picks up his whisky and watches as Namjoon rolls up his sleeves. The expression on the blonde man's face is one of exhaustion.

Huffing out, your coworker leans back into his chair with a groan.

"Y/N has been working so hard the past few days that it's running everyone else into the ground,"Joon announces, lifting his glass of wine.

Just to hear the way the man speaks your name, to see the adoration through his tired mocha irises makes Guk want to spit on the ground.

The blonde man notices the tension and anger in an instant but all he does is simply cross his legs confidently.

"I've know Y/N for a long fucking time. So long that… it sometimes feels like I've known her forever," Namjoon whispers, looking down into his glass. He doesn't know what he's going to say but he needs to say something.

The escort leans back into his chair, nursing the whiskey as he keeps his eyes on the older man.

"When I first met her… I grew a crush on her immediately. She was mean and vicious but she did it with poise and flare. I've been in love with her for years and she's never given me the time of day… But when you came along it was almost like it didn't even take you a week for her whole personality to change. Then I realized… I was never right for her. She looks at me like I'm some sort of background character and I'll never actually have a chance with her. I could try for seven more years and she'll never reciprocate because she doesn't care for me. I don't know if she would even call me a friend after all this time."

Guk simply watches Joon's inner monologue bleed forth from his lips like he's been dying to say this for ages.

Your coworker combs his fingers through his hair, completely at odds with what to do next. He's taking a lot on his shoulders and he's not even your significant other.

It's almost parasocial in a way.

Guk sighs softly, letting the burn of the whisky soothe his nerves.

What are you going through?

"Does she hate me? Why is she doing this?" your ex inquires hopelessly.

With a frown, Namjoon guzzles down the expensive wine. He shakes his head slowly as if he's trying to figure out exactly what he wants to do and say.

"I can't help her like you can. She doesn't… I'm not the one that she needs," your coworker breathes.

"So what're you saying?" the escort inquires, setting down his now empty glass.

"My car has black out windows so if you sit in the backseat then when I pull up to her gates the guards won't see you," Joon announces, setting his glass down and standing up.

"What?" Guk breathes, tilting his head.

"Just be quiet and follow me," the older man mumbles, rolling his eyes, "she's gonna fucking kill me, man."

A soft crying entered her ear and it got louder by the second. Seeming to go from the phone to behind her. “Dick?” she asked softly and turned around at hearing gasps. She turned around and sucked in a breath, her phone clattering to the ground beside her. “X-Xan?” she gasped out, her hands going to cover her mouth as tears started forming in her eyes.

Standing feet from her, was Xan, tears falling down his cheeks as he looked at her. Behind him was Dick and his brothers along with Mari and a couple of friends. “A-als,” he gasped out, taking a hesitant step toward her.

“Xan!” She rushed over to him as he rushed over to her. He collapsed into her arms and started crying into her shoulder as she gripped the back of his shirt tightly. “X-Xan! I-I thought-I thought you-you were dead,” she gasped out, her knees gave out and the two fell to their knees sobbing. Everyone was quiet around them, some tearing up themselves as they watched.

“I-I was,” he croaked out. “I-I was-so-I was so scared-that-that you were going-going to be upset-or-or something,” he gasped out and felt Alya shaking her head against his shoulder as she cried.

“N-no! I could-never! I’d never be angry-or-or upset with you,” Alya replied into his shoulder. “B-but how did?” she asked, pulling back to look him in the eyes while one hand wiped away her tears.

“I-later,” he said and she nodded, cupping his face in her hands, wiping away his tears before pulling him in again for a hug.

“I’m just glad your safe now,” she whispered, holding him close.

“Hey Als, there are a couple of people here that you need to thank,” Dick called and Alya pulled back and tilted her head at Dick.

“Who?” she asked and Dick placed a hand on both Damian’s and Mari’s shoulders and gently pushed them forward.

“These two. They were the ones that brought him home to you safely,” he said and Mari smiled shyly while Damian looked a bit uncomfortable with it but nodded to her. Alya stumbled to her feet and made her way over to the two and pulled them into a hug.

“Thank you,” she breathed out as she held them tightly. Mari responded to the hug immediately and returned it. Damian was slow to respond and a watery laugh left Alya at how awkward the hug Damian gave was. She pulled back and patted Damian’s shoulder reliving him of giving a hug. “Thank you guys, seriously. This is the best surprise I could ask for.”

“You’re welcome, Alya,” Mari said beaming at her as Xan finally stood up after taking a moment, an officer helping him with tissues. Xan stood behind Alya and patted her shoulder. “Sorry to cut this short. But, we still have one other person to surprise,” she said and Alya nodded.

“Of course, of course. Go surprise Lana with the best surprise ever. But before you leave, can I quickly ask, who is this?” she asked looking at the italian with Mari that had her hair pulled back in a hald ponytail that went into a braid, on the sides of her face, she had some hair in messy loose tails, with blunt bangs. The girl in question waved shyly as she stepped forward.

“Hey, I’m a friend of Mari’s and Xan’s. Name’s Lila,” she introduced and Alya nodded and shook her hand.

“Nice to meet you, Lila,” she said with a soft smile before leaning in close. “You better treat Xan right, otherwise there will be words,” she whispered pulling back with a pleasant smile. Lila meanwhile had a blush on her cheeks as she nodded to her words, figuring she did not want to see what happens if she breaks Xan’s heart. That is if she started dating Xan to even have that risk. Ya, she first had to start dating Xan.

“See you later, Alya!” Mari called happily as the small group then headed toward the door.

“Grayson!” Lingo called out and Alya turned to their superior.

“Yes, Captain Lingo?” Alya asked and Lingo glared at her.

“Not you, Grayson, the other one. Where are you going? You need to get back to work,” he called and Dick winced.

“Sorry, sir. But I asked ahead of time to have the rest of the day off,” he said.

“Not with me. Get your butt back in here we have work to do,” he said and Dick sighed as he moved away from the group.

“Sorry, Mini D. I’ll see you tonight,” Dick said softly, patting Damian’s shoulder.

“But sir,” Alya started and Lingo turned to glare at her.

“No, buts, Detective,” he said and Alya gnashed her teeth together as she took a deep breath.

“No, sir. I won’t step down. He went to Commissioner Gordon and asked for the rest of today off to spend time with his little brother who returned from a trip out of the country. He was granted that by Commissioner Gordon, and you denying that is undermining the Commissioner. I don’t think the Commissioner will enjoy hearing that Captain,” she said glaring at Lingo in return. “So I suggest, Captain,” she had venom dripping from her lips as she said his title, “that you allow Dick to continue his requested day off unless you want Gordon to hear about this,” she finished and Lingo nodded. A smirk painted her lips as Dick beamed at her, pulling her into a hug.

“You’re the best Als,” he whispered before bounding out of the precinct. The others followed behind him quickly, nodding to Alya who smiled at them as Lingo ran back to his office.

“That man is horrid,” Sarah said and Alya had to nod agreement.

“Ya, makes me regret turning down the position while back,” she said and Sarah looked at her confused.

“You did the test?”

“Ya, got into the top 5%. But I declined the position. Should have accepted, then we wouldn’t have to deal with him,” she replied quietly with a sigh. “But that’s in the past. Get back to work.” With that, Alya went back to her desk and picked up her discarded phone and went back to work after sending Dick a text.

Alya: Lana should be on her lunch break by the time you get there. So go to the cafeteria

Dick: Got it! Thanks again!

Alya: np

~~~~~~~~~~~~(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lana set her plate down with a sigh. She was excited to go home after she ate lunch. Usually, she ate at home, but after that test, she needed the comfort of a crappy slice school pizza and a chocolate bar. The steady hum over the cafeteria of students talking quietly went silent and Lana started looking around wondering what caused it. Please no villain attack, she thought as she realized everyone was looking toward her, the door behind her. She turned in her seat and a look of shock crossed her face.

Her chair scrapping against the tile echoed throughout the room as she stood up. Tears started gathering in her eyes as she covered her mouth with a hand. Her other hand raised up shakily. “X-Xan?” she called out softly, her voice cracking. Xan was nodding frantically in the door as Damian and the others stayed outside, letting the moment happen.

“I-its really me,” he whispered, tears having never stopped falling even as he tried wiping them away. A gasped out sob left her as she stumbled toward him. He saw as her knees gave out and caught her in a hug. A hug that returned tightly as they fell to the floor crying. Nothing could leave Lana besides sobs as she held him close.

As the two hugged each other, they didn’t hear the whispers springing up. The others watching tho, they could hear and looked at them. Most were happy that Xan was back but they were wary. It was a fair concern but they hoped that wouldn’t be a problem. Lana’s sobs slowly quieted down so she was only breathing heavily as she pulled back, wiping away the tears that Xan shed while he did the same for her.

“I-I’m so glad your ok,” she whispered and Xan gave a small nod.

“Hey,” Dick called softly, crouching down next to them, placing a hand on each of their shoulders. “Why don’t we head back to your place, Lana,” he said and she nodded.

“O-of course, let me just,” she trailed off and smiled softly when she saw that Jason had picked up her bag with Tim grabbing her sad excuse of a lunch into a container. “Thanks,” she whispered as Xan then helped her up and they walked to the cars. “You don’t need your cars.”

A couple looked confused while the others had ‘Oh duh’ looks. She smiled softly as she quietly told Xan about some things that have gone on while he was away as they walked to the apartment complex across from the college. That had Lila and Adrien also having the ‘oh’ face as they realized why the cars would be redundant.

She unlocked the door for them and crouched down immediately. Everyone but Dick looked confused at that before a small brown tabby ran straight into her arms. Soft coos left Lana as she stood up and walked into the apartment and the others followed behind. “This is Cocoa, Alya adopted her for me a month ago,” she introduced and sat down. Xan sat down next to her on the couch as Tim handed her the container of her lunch. She nodded to him in thanks and started eating it, knowing Xan had something to get off his chest.

~~~~~~~~~~~~(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧~~~~~~~~~~~~

By the end of it, Lana was hugging Xan close once more. He didn’t tell her everything. Didn’t tell her how he suffered. How he was killed so many times. Why Joker attacked and killed him. He didn’t think he’d ever tell her. He gasped softly against her shoulder.

“I’m so sorry you had to face that,” Lana whispered softly, hugging him tightly while Lila held Mari’s and Damian’s hands tightly as she processed what she heard. She barely breathed as she watched the two interact. She couldnt stop herself anymore and rushed over and hugged Xan’s back tightly with a gasp. Tensed up at that, and glanced down to see Lila’s ars around him.

Oh ya, she was here, he realized with a grimace, probably should have given her a warning or something. Was not planning on telling her so soon. But oh well. He moved a hand down and gave Lila’s hand a squeeze.

“It’s ok. Mari’s grandpa helped me so much. It doesn’t bother me much anymore,” he whispered and Lana pulled back with a hum and cupped Xan’s cheek.

“That may be, I’m still allowed to say sorry you had to go through that,” she replied and Xan nodded slowly.

If only you knew the real truth. How broken would you be then? Possibly too broken. She can’t ever know, he thought sadly, keeping back the tears with a soft sigh and nod to her answer. While tears still pooled in his eyes, she didn’t comment on them.

“We should get Mari and the others back,” Damian said quietly and the two nodded understanding. With a little coercion, Lila pulled away and was led away by Mari and Adrien with Damian and his brothers trailing behind them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dick looked at his phone a bit shocked. Babs looked over at him and watched as his face went from curious to a soft and sad look. “Sorry,” he said getting up from the table to answer his phone. “Hey-’

“Dick, I-I don’t know what to do. He-he shouldn’t have had to go thru that! He should have had a normal childhood! Worrying about grades! If the girl he had a crush on liked him back! Annoying his older sisters! Practicing to get his driver’s license! Not this! I know that Damian faced the same, but, hearing that it happened to Xan! God! How do you react? What do you do?! I need help Dick, please. Xan doesn’t act like it’s hurting him anymore but I just-how do-what do I do?” Alya spoke quickly, her voice cracking as she cried. She couldn’t believe everything Xan went thru. He didn’t tell her everything but told her more than Lana when she left the room. And he only did that she told him she knew Damian’s past and everything about his family. Something Damian told him the basics of when they were talking in Mari’s room.

“Hey, it’s ok, Als. Take a deep breath in now, ok thats it. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8. Now exhale, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8. That’s it, in now. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8. Out, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8,” Dick said counting out the breaths as Alya did them with gasps. He could admit, it shocked him to hear Alya so distraught and upset. He hasn’t seen her cry like that since Xan first disappeared. She was usually so calm and sure minded that seeing her unravel was offputting. She didn’t even cry when she broke up with Cole. granted, that was a mutual thing realizing they were better friends, but still, she hadn’t reacted much to it. When he was confident she was calm, he stopped counting, which had gone on for quite a bit. “There, ok. I know this isn’t what you want to hear, but...you have to let him come to you. I know that sucks, that you want to help immediately, but you can’t Als. I’m sorry but you can’t. You need to trust Xan. Ya, he was gone for 8 years. But, he was with Fu for a year. He’s helped Xan heal so much so that he could come home without worrying about messing anything up while here. You just gotta let him know that if he ever needs you, that you’ll be there for him. That’s all you can do. It’s what I did for Damian, it’s what you’ll have to do for Xan.” Alya sniffled over the line, nodding along to what he was saying as she wiped away the remaining tears.

“T-thanks Dick. I-I’ll do that. God, why is this so hard?” she said with a ragged breath.

“Who knows, Als. It just is. But I’ll be here for you whenever you need me, you got that?” he asked and a soft, watery giggle left Alya.

“Ya, I know that. Seriously, thank you, Dick. You’re the best,” she whispered quietly as she finally wiped away all the tears.

“I know, but why don’t you go back and hang with Xan. I bet he really wants to spend every second he can get with you.”

“I will. I just needed to get some advice while they looked for a movie. See you at work tomorrow.”

“See you then,” Dick replied with a smile as he ended the call. He turned back to Babs and saw the slight frown on her lips. “What’s wrong?” he asked softly.

“Should you really be promising that you’ll be there for Alya whenever she needs you? You know you can’t promise that,” Babs said and Dick nodded slowly.

“I know that. And Alya knows that as well. She knows that I’ll do what I can when I’m available. But why does that bug you?” he asked and Babs looked away from him. He was glad that the others were in the den right now. He did not want them to hear this apparent disagreement.

“Well, it seems that your willing to do anything for her. I get that she’s your partner at the precinct and close friends. She’s the only one I trust to keep your butt safe. But, this just seems a bit extreme. Would you do this for any other close friend of yours?” Babs asked seriously and Dick hummed softly and he crouched down in front of her and placed a hand on her knee.

“I would. And you know that. Her being my precinct partner changes nothing. It just means we’ve helped each other more than some of my other coworker friends. But I would go out of my way for each of them,” he replied and Babs looked down at that.

“I don’t know. It seems like this is more than just helping out a friend. You seem to be doing more for her than anyone else. I need you to really look at yourself and ask if she’s just a friend,” Babs said with a sigh. She rolled back away from Dick and started toward the deck. She wasn’t blind, she could tell there was something between them. Possibly more. It hurt, but she also knew they were drifting away slowly.

She wanted to see if they could fix it.

But she could see that they wouldn’t.

It hurt, but, not as much as she thought it would.

As long as they were both happy.

Mari-aculous @MDC_Designs The surprise went well!! I’m glad to have made their days so great!! #specialmoments #reunion #surprises *two pics. First is of Alya and Xan hugging on the precincts floor crying. Second is of Lana and Xan hugging on a cafeteria floor crying*

Im not crying @actingfordays It was so sweet but jesus im still crying #notcool #crying #toosweet #sosad

Dick @FlyingGrayson It was amazing, your so great Mari. Als may have said it in few words, but she’s very grateful to what you did #sweetangel #sunshinechild #toosweetforus

Mari-aculous @MDC_Designs I know Dick, I know. I’m glad to help!