#ch:tao

                      (858): Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza.                                  I’m a monster and I understand if you hate me forever. 

“Just one more round of shots, hyung, please?” Tao whines, his mouth falling into an impressively over exaggerated pout. It’s a testament to the power of Tao’s aegyo (or maybe the fact that Junmyeon can never say no) that the black card is handed over without much fuss from it’s owner.

Junmyeon calls out to Tao’s retreating back, “But only one more round Tao-yah!”

The younger boy weaves in and out of the crowd almost seamlessly, avoiding any major collisions on his way back to the bar. He tries to think through the haze of alcohol to how many shots he’ll need. Junmyeon who’s waiting for him across the room, Sehun twerking for a group of onlookers in the middle of the dance floor, two for Luhan who looks extra forlorn at the sight of a pretty brunette grinding into Minseok, maybe Jongdae and Yixing if they would stop making out in a bathroom stall. Still, Tao can’t help but feel like he’s missing someone and realizes just who, when said person comes barreling into the side of his body.

“Taozi!,” Baekhyun slurs excitedly. Tao takes note of the glassy eyes and loose limbs. Maybe Baekhyun should sit this round out.

“Where did you go, Baekhyunnie?” Tao asks, turning away to give his order to the bartender.

Long, thin fingers dig uncomfortably into Tao’s side as Baekhyun snuggles his head underneath Tao’s outstretched arm. “To the bathroom. Jongdae and Yixing are making out in there. Totally gross.” Baekhyun wrinkles his nose.

Tao lets his arm hang down around Baekhyun’s shoulders and gives a light squeeze. He gets a whine of contentment in response. Baekhyun vibrates with energy, like a puppy left too long inside a cage. “Well that just means more shots for the rest of us then.”

“Please tell me you have Junmyeon hyung’s black card,” Baekhyun pulls away from Tao, sounding suspiciously sober. His eyes are wide, lined with dark coal, and the shimmering club lights make them smolder. His lips pull into a smirk, and Tao knows that Baekhyun’s itching to put the coveted card to good use.

"Maybe I do," Tao answers. "Depends on what exactly you want to use it for."

Baekhyun smiles wickedly and laughs. “Well it looks to me like Junmyeon hyung is not having nearly enough fun. Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”

Ah, Byun Baekhyun, always such a troublemaker. Somewhere in the back of Tao’s mind he knows this is a bad idea, but a combination of alcohol and Baekhyun’s hopeful face drowns out his better instincts. So he turns to the other, usual boyish smile replaced by a wolfish grin, and meets Baekhyun’s eyes.

"Excuse me, bartender…"

Nearly an hour later, a pitcher filled with dark liquid (in a purplish hue) sits on the bar top. Baekhyun and Tao had created their own concoction, a random combination of different alcohols that went down much too smoothly. The bartender resisted at first, but a flash of the black card had been all it took for him to quickly relent to the boys’ requests.

Junmyeon is confused when both Tao and Baekhyun return to the group’s private booth, not with a tray of shots, but the suspicious looking pitcher.

"What took so long? Tao-yah, I thought you were getting shots?"

Tao wraps a hand around Junmyeon’s arm and bats his eyelashes. “Hyung,” he whines, “this tastes so much better. Try some.”

"I don’t know. It looks…"

"Suspicious?" Baekhyun asks, before handing a glass to Junmyeon. "Don’t worry. It’s delicious. Try it."

Junmyeon, never one to put up much of a fight, nods before lifting the glass to his lips and taking a sip. His eyes widen before he slightly nods to himself. “This is pretty good, actually.”

“I told you hyung,” Tao says, looking smug.

Always a lightweight, it takes only two of the drinks to send Junmyeon into a state of intoxication far beyond his usual; from there he provides endless entertainment for Baekhyun and Tao. Face flushed, words slurring, Junmyeon regales the pair with barely coherent ramblings about Luhan’s beauty and how he could surely seduce him with his dancing.

It’s Baekhyun who convinces Junmyeon to go after Luhan. Howling with laughter at Junmyeon’s uncoordinated dance moves and Luhan’s bewildered face, the pair decide to move on to fresh prey.

They set their sights on Sehun next, who had continued to entertain onlookers with a mixture of obscene hip thrusting, his bubble butt, and good looks. Only one drink later, he begins to strip, spurred on by the alcohol and screams of approval.

During this time, Minseok has moved on from just dancing with the pretty brunette to laughter and kissing in a dark corner of the club. Baekhyun gives a whoop of approval at the turn of events, and Tao whispers, “Good for you Minseokie hyung”, for only himself to hear. Then, almost as if sharing a brain, both Tao and Baekhyun turn to Luhan in tandem.

To say that Luhan is a mess would be an understatement. Junmyeon still hangs off one of Luhan’s arms, giggling and rambling on about something or another. But Luhan remains oblivious to the attention, eyes trained on Minseok and almost on the verge of tears.

Baekhyun turns to Tao, face serious, and simply states, “We need to save him,” before grabbing one of Tao’s hands and pulling him towards Luhan and Junmyeon.

"Heyyyy," Baekhyun says, leaning his head on one of Luhan’s shoulders. He nods approval at Tao, who has led Junmyeon back out on the dance floor. "Why so glum, chum?"

Luhan sniffles before looking down at Baekhyun. “Oh nothing, I’m perfectly fine.”

“I don’t think you’re fine at all,” Baekhyun grabs Luhan’s hand and looks in the direction Minseok is standing. “Is this about Minseok hyung?”

A stutter comes out before Luhan gives in and sighs, “I just don’t understand Baekhyun-ah. I’m manly, I’m good at soccer, my eyes sparkle in the sunlight…why doesn’t Minseok want me?”

“Hmmmmm,” Baekhyun takes a moment to search for the right words, “I just think that Minseok hyung doesn’t like dick? Which I mean of course sucks for you, but we were bound to have one straight friend, right?”

Luhan’s eyes raise, unimpressed. “You truly have no tact.”

“I know right!” Baekhyun’s face scrunches up and his square smile gleams in the darkness. “That’s why you love me so much.”

Luhan remains silent. Then scowls.

“Anyway,” Baekhyun plows on, “I think I know how to chase those blues away.” He pushes Luhan away from the direction of Minseok and Pretty Brunette, to face Junmyeon and Tao.

Junmyeon’s face is wrinkled in concentration: tongue sticking slightly out of his mouth and eyebrows furrowed. He appears to be doing some sort of grinding motion with his hips, but Baekhyun can’t be totally sure since he’s so offbeat. Tao stands next to him, head thrown back in unabashed laughter and arms raised up, swaying with at least a semblance of rhythm.

“See that nerd we all know and love?” Baekhyun asks and lifts a finger to point at Junmyeon. “He likes dick. And from what I hear, he’s really interested in yours.”

Luhan looks surprised, like the thought of Junmyeon having a soppy crush on him is something that has never crossed his mind. “Are you serious right now or are you fucking with me?”

"Dead serious my friend. So what do you say? Ready to go catch yourself a fish?"

Luhan is barely able to get out much more than an “ummm” in response before Baekhyun shoves him hard enough to send him careening straight into Junmyeon’s arms.

"We need to get Luhan hyung drunk," Baekhyun says to Tao, who has exited the dance floor to rejoin Baekhyun.

"I think you’re right Baekhyunnie. They look so…"

"Awkward?" Baekhyun supplies.

Tao nods, “We should make it a big one.”

The two stand at the table of the group’s private booth, and fill a glass with double the amount of alcohol they have given everyone else so far, head’s bent together in laughter. Tao looks unsure for a moment.

"Wait, are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Luhan hyung is good at holding his liquor. He’ll be fine." With a wave of his hand, Baekhyun goes back to mixing the drink.

The pair make their way back to the dance floor, where Junmyeon is still in Luhan’s arms, his face slumped against Luhan’s neck. He seems to be mumbling something, while Luhan looks vaguely terrified. Baekhyun tries not to snicker when he hands over the drink in his hand.

"What’s this?"

"Ummmm," Baekhyun stumbles.

"It’s a, uh, some drink the bartender recommended. Super fancy. It’s delicious, drink it," Tao cuts in.

Luhan looks between the two before he gives the drink a sniff, eyes narrowed. An overwhelmingly sweet smell fills his nostrils. “This better not kill me.”

"Oh don’t worry, it won’t!" Baekhyun reassures him.

Junmyeon lifts his head from Luhan’s neck to grunt in agreement. “So very very yummy.” Junmyeon trails a hand down the side of Luhan’s face. “So very very pretty.”

"Drink up Luhan hyung!" Baekhyun claps Luhan on the back before turning back towards the group’s booth, grabbing Tao’s wrist and dragging him along. “Now how about we have some fun of our own? Can’t let Junmyeon hyung’s money go to waste.”

Two hours later, Tao and Baekhyun stand on the edge of the crowd and take in their handiwork, flushed from finishing off the pitcher of suspicious (yet delicious) purple liquor.

"Well friend, I say it’s been a pretty successful night. Don’t you think?" Baekhyun asks Tao.

Sehun, shirt off and hair soaked, lays amidst a pile of bras and dollar bills. Junmyeon and Luhan are still out on the dance floor, only now Junmyeon’s tongue is firmly down Luhan’s throat. (Minseok seems to have left with Pretty Brunette.) Jongdae and Yixing, unsurprisingly, are still missing.

Tao nods before turning to Baekhyun and holding his hand out. “It was nice working with you tonight.” Baekhyun takes his hand and shakes, smiling.

Tao doesn’t know if it’s the alcohol or the way that the club lights dance across Baekhyun’s face, but he sort of wants to kiss the stupid smirk off of Baekhyun’s lips. So he does.

Baekhyun’s lips feel dry against Tao’s own, but they’re warm and inviting, and Baekhyun feels so small against him. It feels….good. So Tao deepens the kiss, his tongue exploring Baekhyun’s mouth. He tastes like grape soda and bubblegum and when Baekhhyun gives the tiniest of whimpers, Tao smiles against his mouth. They separate and Tao preens a little, pleased to see that Baekhyun looks stunned, but thoroughly satisfied.

“I sort of hate to admit this, but you might be a better kisser than I am.”

Tao shrugs his shoulders in a show of nonchalance, but he looks entirely too pleased with himself. “I’m the better dancer, too,” he says and leads Baekhyun out on the dance floor.

In the aftermath of Baekhyun and Tao’s reign of terror, Jongdae and Yixing finally return from their bathroom tryst.

"Should we help them, maybe?" Yixing asks Jongdae, dumbfounded at the sight in front of him.

Luhan and Junmyeon are still wrapped up in each other, whispering and giggling into each other’s ears, oblivious to anyone around them. Sehun sits at the booth, looking dazed as he methodically counts dollar bills. There’s a black lace bra hanging around his neck.

Jongdae scratches his cheek. “I…I think they can probably handle themselves?”

"I think you’re right," Yixing slips his hand into Jongdae’s. “Let’s go home.”

Jongdae nods in agreement, and when Yixing gives him a wink he just buries his face in Yixing’s shoulder to hide his laughter.

Baekhyun and Tao don’t see Jongdae and Yixing leave the club arm in arm, too busy laughing and dancing and sneaking occasional kisses. Even though the electronic beat is thumping hard enough to vibrate their bones, Tao knows Baekhyun is pressed close enough to his body to feel his stomach suddenly give a loud grumble.

“Oh, is someone hungry?” Baekhyun laughs and pinches Tao’s cheek.

Tao, thoroughly drunk, can feel the heat of embarrassment crawl up his neck. “No,” he pouts, pushing Baekhyun’s hand away from his face.

Baekhyun stands on his tiptoes and nips at the underside of Tao’s jaw. “Now don’t pout. How about Baekhyunnie hyung buys his favorite dongsaeng a pizza.”

“I said no,” Tao growls in Baekhyun’s ear. He can feel the annoyance claw it’s way up his throat. Baekhyun just looks wide eyed and intrigued.

“Oh, getting feisty. I like it,” Baekhyun slips a hand underneath Tao’s shirt, his fingers warm and feather light against Tao’s skin. It makes him shiver.

“Baekhyun hyung…”

A hand snakes up Tao’s neck to bend his head down low. Baekhyun’s breath feels hot against his ear. “Well if you’re not hungry for pizza maybe we should head back to my place. Have something a little more to your taste.”

Tao’s mouth goes dry and all he can do is nod dumbly in agreement before Baekhyun slips his fingers through his and leads him out of the club.

Sunlight streams through the open curtain, bright and harsh against Tao’s eyelids.  His tongue feels sandpaper rough on the roof of his mouth, and his head is fuzzy; he can feel the beginnings of a headache start to coalesce around his temples. Opening his eyes seems like more trouble than it’s worth, so Tao rolls over only to hit a warm body and a large cardboard box.

“Why is there a half eaten pizza in the bed?”

“Oh you don’t remember?” Baekhyun asks, rolling over to rest his chin on Tao’s outstretched arm. “You got hungry last night and then got all pissed off when I tried to buy you a pizza. It was cute.”

“No, I remember that. And I remember leaving and taking a cab back here. But after that…” Tao trails off.

Baekhyun laughs, “Well after we got back you spent a good thirty minutes apologizing for what a monster you are, when really all I wanted to do was kiss you some more.”

Tao’s cheeks turn red and he buries his face in the pillow. “Baekhyun hyung, that still doesn’t explain the pizza in bed with us right now.”

“Oh yeah, well then you decided to buy me a pizza as an apology,” Baekhyun cards his fingers through Tao’s hair for a moment before continuing. “When you were getting your credit card out you realized that you still had Junmyeon hyung’s card, and I convinced you to buy me five pizzas instead.”

Tao’s eyes shoot open, “What?!” Baekhyun tries to keep a straight face. “Junmyeon hyung is going to kill me! And never let me use his card again.”

“Nah, Junmyeon hyung’s a softie. Anyway, once the pizzas came we ate like half of one in bed and then passed out.”

“Oh,” Tao looks abashed for a moment. “I’m sorry for ruining the end of the night. I understand if you hate me forever.”

Baekhyun sits up in bed and gives a handful of Tao’s bum a squeeze. “Don’t be silly, you have all morning to make it up to me. Plus, we’ve got all day to eat like, four more pizzas.”

Tao gives a nod of agreement and laughs sheepishly, before rolling over on his back. He’s not ready to get out of bed just yet, even though he could really do with a glass of water and some asprin. But as he watches Baekhyun pad out of the bedroom, he notices something strange.