#ce's thoughts

It's such a good episode. Different from the format they usually go for, and it was fun to see it unfold.

It really shows Emily strength and it hints once again at the fact that she is way too composed and tactical for someone coming off of a desk job (although it has been almost two years by then). But again, her strength. One hell of a lady.

It also shows how much her and Spencer care for each other and I love it. The way Spencer just stares and doesn't have to say anything for her to understand how he feels. And even though she took a hell of a beating and he's unharmed, she still reassures him.

I admire Prentiss for taking the fall and admitting she was the FBI agent. I honestly think it was the best way to go. Spencer already established a rapport with Cyrus by admitting his leadership impressed him at the beginning of the episode, which Cyrus appreciated. Plus, he often showed he was good at playing into the unsubs' games, like he did by making Cyrus believe he understood what he was doing. And Emily is very strong under pressure. She knows how to keep her cool and could establish a better rapport with the women.

Hotch saying he can't go in and he didn't know how he would be able to take it if something happened to Reid or Prentiss. Papa Hotch <3

I found it strange to hear Prentiss say "where is the man I came in with". Not that Spencer isn't a man, but I'm so used to everyone calling him a kid.

Emily is hurt, and yet she still insists on going to get Reid when she has no weapon or vest. Did I say how great she is?

How the hell did Spencer and Derek get out in time. The daughter had the remote in her hand by the time Spencer yelled to run.

Emily's visible relief when she spotted her boys coming out. Her and Spencer hugging. And then Spencer holding her close. <3

Heartbreaking that the whole thing started with a mother wanting to save her daughter, yet she still lost her.

Again with Emily reassuring Spencer! Strong woman! And Spencer. How the hell can this man say so little, yet express so much.

I was getting slightly emotional when Spencer, overwhelmed with grief, ran out of the cabin as soon as "It's Gideon" fell out of Hotch's mouth.

And then the moonlight caught on Penelope's bedazzled blue uggs boots.

Spencer made a shiv (that what they call it?) and I thought it was to defend himself, but my smart boy went and faked an attack on his own person to get isolated. You go, boy. The only place he can possibly catch some Z. I have a hard time getting over the proud smirk when the guard pulls him off the ground.

I wonder how his stay in the prison would have been if he hadn't poisoned the drugs. Glad he just caused some damage, not killed people.

He looks on the verge of tears when Emily tells him about his mom and tells him to stay isolated. The way his face is so tight.

Emily is a boss! The way she defends her case in front of the judge (alright, maybe a bit too emotional) and against that counsellor, yes! Show them who's in charge!

Penelope, my love, you can't leave (although I get it... I could never go through all that she's been through). Thankfully I know Reid won't die, so her resignation won't go through.

The way Spencer's face melts right back to his soft self when he realizes JJ is there to get him out.

He waits for the door to open without even realizing it. </3 I think it's good he isn't allowed to go with them at Lindsay's location. I doubt he is stable.

Cat is a boss villain though. I dislike her person (I don't like bad people), but it's a great character and she's interesting.

Oh wait, the Cat/Reid face-off is in this episode? (Turns out it wasn't.)

Emily's comments about the place she wanted to buy were just too... Heavy. I remember having this weird foreboding feeling when I first watched the episode. It felt like she was talking about the team, or her place with the team. Cracks in the foundation. Turns out, I was pretty much right. Not surprised Morgan was the one to call her out on it first.

When Will walks into the bank and Morgan and Prentiss have to physically restrain JJ. Man, she knows how to tug at my heartstrings.

Shoutout to what I think might be the only time we see Penelope in an FBI vest. I like it.

I only just realized how Erin and Aaron sound similar. I thought JJ said Erin.

Can we take a moment to appreciate JJ's hand-to-hand combat skills? The way she disarms the gun? The rounded kick (or whatever it's called)?

Also shoutout to Emily's cool analytic skills! Ignoring Hotch and getting Will ot if this mess.

Okay, but the ending breaks my heart all over again, with Emily is just walking around and looking at her friends, and then dancing with each of them. The song doesn't help.

They all look stunning in their dresses and suit. Unfair.

Spencer and Henry. Heart = melted.

Also, I only just realized Strauss was there, at JJ and Will's wedding. It doesn't really makes sense to me, considering they lowkey all dislike her? Maybe it's just a work thing, not a person thing. But then again, I guess after going through what they all went through together... And knowing Rossi was secretely seeing her...

Almost evey time I spot her, she's dancing with Rossi. Subtle, guys.

It's so sweet to see Emily dancing with everyone, laughing with them <3 but when the three girls dance together... I don't know, there's something really heartwarming about it.

The way Hotch and Emily dance together is weirdly intimate... Weird tension.

I had a little walk down memory lane, yesterday, with my friend of eight years. We met on tumblr after I asked questions about a concert she was also going to.

She looked at my blog for a better idea of who I was (back then, a mixture of Glee, Harry Potter, and random funny posts), and hesitantly reached out, apologizing at the same time for doing so.

I'm glad she did. I never thought it was weird. But I always think it is when I do the same, so I understood. I was just really happy to talk to someone. We were both respectful and we had common interests that allowed us to fall into a comfortable back and forth of emails, so it was just really nice.

We were both careful, knowing that the internet hides a lot of danger, so we both agreed that we wouldn't share any personal details. No photos, no names. All we knew was that we were both going to that concert and we both lived around the same area.

But then, the temptation blurred our determination. "If you see red skinny jeans..." "A blue bag with white polka dots..." And after several hours of waiting in the sun, by the Phoenix concert theatre, and with several more hours ahead still, I walked along the line of fans and spotted the blue, polka-dotted bag.

It was a relief to see that the little information we'd allowed ourselves to share had been true. And that day, a wall came down.

We started occasionnally visiting each other, and we kept on chatting online several days a week. Whenever I was struggling and didn't know who to turn to other than the dark hole that tumblr can sometimes be, she would remind me that she was there. I really hope I was able to do the same for her.

We were there for one another as we grew and crossed different stages of our lives (surprising how many things can happen in only eight years...). Our common interests faltered, occasionnally replaced by new ones. We both stepped away from tumblr, I came back, she didn't. We'd sometimes go months without reaching out, until one of us eventually did, and it always felt like there had been no pause in the conversation.

We have a rare understanding. It's a very honest friendship, and it's refreshing. I'm very grateful to have her as a friend, and I'm grateful that even though she sees all my flaws, she still voluntarily offers her friendship. She's one of the rare few people that I feel a good level of comfort with.

Eight years... It feels like we couldn't have met that long ago, but like I've known her for so much longer...