Brewery : Captain Fatty’s Beer : Moon Glow Style : DIPA / Imperial IPA / Double IPA Variance : None

10 / 10

BOOM SHAKALAKA! HE’S ON FIRE! YES! RAZZLE DAZZLE! IT”S GOOD! IS IT THE SHOES?! Ok, so the whole shoes thing didn’t really make sense but if the announcer from NBA Jam was able to scream any of the other quotes above every time I took a sip of this I’m pretty sure my life would be damn near perfect. Being that I used to be in a touring band I can really relate to this beer’s name because we were notorious for doing overnight drives and there was nothing better than driving on a dark highway with only the glow of the moon to make sure you didn’t kill a family of deer or even worse, a hitchhiker. Actually come to think of it we may have killed a few of them and by them I mean none of your business… moving on. This beer is perfection in a 16oz can starting with a super soft mango flavor with just the right amount of sweetness before some light pine and orange flavors mix in bringing a slight but noticeable bitterness before closing up with some tropical flavors with hints of resin to really take this over the top. I would have never guessed that this beer was 8.4% ABV due to how smooth and light it it just like I would have never guessed that Sinead O’Connor would start off as this cute bald chick and eventually transform into a tattooed butch looking nutcase. Please go back to the “Nothing Compares 2U” version of Sinead, please! Anyways, if you know shit about shit you should probably get your ass on the first flight to Goleta, California to pick this up because this is everything and more of what you should be looking for in the style. This is absolutely perfect for first timers due to the fact that it’s like drinking a delicious flavorful cloud broth. As for you bastard drinking crew members, it should be pretty fucking by now clear after suffering through NBA Jam and Sinead O’Connor references you should be picking this up as of yesterday so get your asses moving!

Brewery : Captain Fatty’s Beer : The Truth Style : IPA / India Pale Ale Variance : None

9.5 / 10

“You want the answers?!”

“I want the truth!”

“YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!”

You didn’t think it would be possible for me to review a beer called The Truth without quoting A Few Good Men now did you? Besides that movie the only other thing that comes to mind when looking at this beer’s name is The X-files tag line “The truth is out there” which is actually kind of scary now that you think about it. How did a TV show predict the coming of this beer all the way back in 1993 when Captain Fatty’s didn’t even come into existence until 2013, a whopping 20 years later! How could they have done that? Maybe they are psychic or maybe… just maybe… it could be ALIENS! “Gasp!” You had to have seen that coming. Anyways, I’m not quite sure that Captain Fatty’s knows the meaning of the word “little” because this beer’s slogan is “The Truth Is A Little Hazy” and this beer is down right fucking OJ. There is nothing little about this beer including it’s flavor starting with a super smooth and bitter grapefruit and hoppy flavor before some sweetness mixes in with a cloud like mouthfeel with little bursts of citrus and pine before ending with some stronger oniony and resin hops with even more of that super soft citrus flavor. I may not know many things but I can tell you one thing for certain : The truth is that this beer is fucking phenomenal and I wish I had more because it’s that friggin’ good. If you are trying to bust your way into the New England haze craze that’s been going on, pick this up because it is everything you should be looking for in the style. As for you professional bastards out there, you NEED to drink this ASAP and if you disagree than I hope you get abducted and a bowling ball sized probe gets jammed up your ass unless you’re into that kind of thing and in which case I hope they harvest all your organs. Basically, go pick this up. Thanks.