Jason indoctrinates Damian
Tim: Hey Dami? Damian: Ya? Tim: When you first came to the Manor, why did you speak like that? Damian: Hello, why are we being racist? Tim: NO I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT YOUR ACCENT- Damian: uh huh and what are you talking about? Tim: The fact that you speak straight out of an SAT vocab quizlet Jason walks in and immediately turns around. Both Tim and Damian spot him Damian: Todd, care to join the discussion? Jason: I'm good thank you I just gotta analyze the DNA of the um coffee, k bye- Damian: JASON GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE Damian: IT'S BECAUSE OF HIM Damian: YOU FEAR MONGERED ME ABOUT THE SAT FROM THE RIPE AGE OF 7 Damian: I HATE YOU Damian: I HATE YOU SO MUCH Jason: As your designated English tutor, I felt as if it was necessary for your future success Damian: YOU READ MARY SHELLEY SO MANY TIMES I ACTUALLY HAVE IT STUCK IN MY BRAIN Jason: WELL THERE WEREN'T ANY NURSERY RHYMES IN THE LEAGUE AND well mumbling Frankenstein was really personal to me Tim: on the floor laughing WAIT SO JASON BASICALLY CONDITIONED YOU TO HAVE A CLASSIC LIT PARLANCE Jason: indignant LIES AND SLANDER. IT'S NOT MY FAULT HE DIDN'T PICK UP ON CASUAL ENGLISH IT'S NOT LIKE I SPOKE FORMALLY 24/7 Damian: YOU BARELY SPOKE AT ALL YOU HAD A SELECTIVE MUTISM Jason: HEY, I BETTER SEE YOU GET AN 800 ON THE READING & WRITING SECTION ON THE SAT THOUGH Tim: SO IT'S FOR THE BEST? Damian: YOU JUST REFUSED TO TELL ME IT WASN'T NORMAL I THOUGHT EVERYONE IN NEW JERSEY SPOKE LIKE THAT Tim: genuinely choking on his laughter NEW JERS- NEW JERSEY??????? LIKE THAT????????? PFFFFFFF
Tim: I was so confused when you first showed up, I thought you were possessed by an Oxford Lit professor or something. That or you really wanted to get that 1600 on the SAT Damian: You literally aren't even that far off Damian: First Jason basically is an Oxford Lit professor, just with guns and insecurity Damian: And second, he told me that College Board created the SAT to rank people based on intelligence and that the dumb ones get outcasted from society and of course my brain was like ah I need to ace this test to prove my worth Damian: HE TOLD ME TO SPEAK LIKE THAT TO 'PRACTICE MY VOCAB' Damian: I LITERALLY USED A QUIZLET TO MEMORIZE THIS Tim: JASON YOU WERE LITERALLY PROJECTING Jason: WELL IT'S NOT LIKE I COULD TAKE THE SAT SO INSTEAD I WAS LIKE I CAN DO IT VICARIOUSLY THROUGH DAMI
Jason: You should be grateful I didn't make you use archaic language like 'thee', 'dost' and 'hath' Damian: WELL ARE YOU HAPPY NOW? Jason: No, I'm euphoric
