#burnerphone

Solo headcanons:

Steph was a hidden pregnancy, nobody knew she was there until her mom (Georgina) went into labour - her parents didn’t want children

Becky was one of her first nannies but only lasted a couple months as Solomon found her really soft and annoying, so as soon as Georgina died, she was fired

She and Grace first met as babies but neither of them know it

Steph was a pretty spoiled child

Shop is her favourite class and the only one she’s consistently getting good marks/attendance for

Mr. Houston is her favourite teacher

Is part of the Smoke Club but isn’t frequently there as much these days

Had a very big Heathers phase, still kinda does

She also had a Hunger Games phase before that and got really into archery, took up classes. Her aim is extraordinarily sharp

She’s actually really athletic and good at a handful of sports, she just doesn’t really bother in school anymore

She is a really avid music listener but cannot read sheet music or play instruments for shit

Really into rock specifically

The online girlie™

Loves horror - films, TV shows, games - and has always been really invested in creepypasta

May or may not have told some scary stories to the Monroe boys’ at the country club and scared them shitless

Seriously, if Steph was in charge of the prank, she could have given Max a heart attack

Is actually really good at debate because her father made her take classes and she gets plenty of practice when getting involved in internet drama

Clearly wins a lot of arguments against him now that she’s older, which gives her the power and cockiness to just wave away his influence and orders (until he gets at her phone of course)

She also is really good at politics

She’s actually really close with Jason and Kyle - childhood friends, basically her older brothers

Cheats at games

Is the “Dakota” in their group’s DND (see StarKid Rolls the Dice)

She’s dyslexic

Was diagnosed late in high school as Solomon was convinced she was just stupid and making excuses as to why she couldn’t do her work

Steph and Miss Tessburger do secretly care about each other. Neither will admit it. Wouldn’t go as far as mother-and-daughter relationship, but definitely tone their bitchiness (to each other) down if they notice the other is having a bad day

Steph puts her money into crypto. Sorry, I can’t imagine Solomon knows what it is or why he’d bother with something so silly

Fidgets with her rings a lot

Is really confident in her own skin, as she should be because she is so beautiful and literally has the school falling after her

Is actually a really good photographer

Her Insta page is undeniably killer

Someone get this girl a proper camera though because the phone can only do so much

In middle school, she, Brenda and Stacy did wear pink every Wednesday

She is incredibly well travelled - having had the money to go anywhere and her father only taking the best holidays - and she really enjoys travelling

One of the taller girls

Claims she doesn’t do dressing up because it’s lame, but gets really into Halloween

Flawless makeup and hair always

People haven’t seen her otherwise for years

Once bribed Grace to let her paint her nails in exchange for having to listen to Grace tell her about the bible. They keep doing this. Steph wipes it all off at the end of the school day so Grace doesn’t get in trouble with her parents

Has a lot of opinions on Spotify Wrapped (both general and hers specifically)

She and Zoey are near identical, leading to the latter always getting mistaken for Steph (as the more well known of the two because local celebrity, the Mayor’s daughter) but Steph has been mistaken for Zoey once or twice by Sam. Kicks him every time

Doesn’t like fake nails

Is a very physical person, especially when showing love

Spends a lot of money on her loved ones

The most competitive person

Lautity:

Pan for pan!

Steph makes a lot of corny pan related jokes, Grace finds them really funny

Again, Grace fell first, Steph fell harder

Steph tries going to church with Grace but really struggles with it

She will, however, attend events at church (bake sales, charity auction, etc) and just messes with the pastors by asking silly questions

Insert Mariah’s “Yah, Father!” here

Is probably Mark and Karen’s least favourite person for that reason

Don’t worry, she gets on really well with Grace’s aunt, Lucy. These bitches talk so much gossip and shit on Grace’s parents (and the Jerries because fuck them)

It’s because of Lucy they met as babies but that’s a story for another time

Grace tries watching horror for Steph but doesn’t like it, spends most of it curled up and hiding in Steph’s side. She still agrees to watch every time

Steph watches documentaries with Grace and asks her questions throughout because Grace talking about her interests is precious

The nerds help Steph write a love note for Grace

They then help Grace make a meme for Steph

Steph has tried and failed to play Grace’s flute

Steph buys Grace sheet music for the dumbest songs (Never Gonna Give You Up, Coconut Mall, All Star, the Mii song, etc) and has her play them for the group, forcing the nerds to listen to them and then tell Grace how good she is

Ruth makes them go see Wicked together as a friend group, purely to have Grace and Steph unknowingly go as Elphaba and Glinda by just wearing their regular clothes/colours. Steph, having definitely seen stuff for the film is prepared, they both show up dressed as completely different movie characters

(Steph went as Jessica Rabbit and Grace went as Sleeping Beauty)

They also didn’t watch the movie at all because they spent the whole time staring at each other and kissing

Burnerphone (Lex x Steph):

The only Steph ship where she loses her dominance

Lex won’t put up with her entitled, rich girl bullshit and will tell her when she’s being a brat

Steph will be more of a brat in the hopes of getting told off for it in the bedroom

They knew of each other when Lex was still in school and interacted in passing but that was about it

They met later through Ziggs at a party

Smoking buds

Lex gets on fairly well with Steph’s friends, though they are awkward because Lex is the epitome of “older, cool college girlfriend” in spite of not in college

Steph smuggles Lex into all the senior events they missed (homecoming, lock in, ditch day, prom, graduation) - probably bought Grace off to keep her quiet about it

Same music tastes

Gets on really well with Hannah

Steph doesn’t really do kids but she makes an exception here

Sends Hannah a photo of a random spider she finds almost every day with the caption “dude, is this ur webby?”

She has absolutely dragged Pamela for filth, if not gotten physical, in most of their interactions

Pamela is convinced Lex is dating Steph just for money

Steph only goes to Toy Zone to flirt with Lex and annoy the fuck out of Frank by shooting him with a nerf gun

Lex isn’t comfortable with a lot of fancy, expensive dates, so they usually just drive out somewhere quiet and have a picnic together

Steph convinces Lex to audition for plays in Hatchetfield

Firephone? Firelight? I don’t know what their ship name is or if they even have one but (Brooke x Steph):

Essentially the more chaotic, less chill and pyromaniac version of Burnerphone

They are Grace’s worst nightmare and honestly Miss Mulberry’s too (and half the HFFD and HFPD)

Smoking buds

Brooke brings out Steph’s impulsivity to its full power

Steph encourages Brooke’s don’t give a fuck attitude

Personally responsible for all the fire alarms going off in Hatchetfield High

If these two both leave to go to the bathroom together, you might as well grab your shit and head outside now

They are big time gossipers

Definitely get into the most insane situations

Seriously, playing Never Have I Ever with them is an experience because you get to hear about all their stories which are really good but totally nuts

Probably meet up when being sent to the Principal’s office, go off, make out and then come back like nothing happened

Queens of the Smoke Club