#buffyology

Like, I remembered the plot well enough- you don’t forget “it’s scary to fall in love with my substitute teacher because what if they’re secretly a praying mantis who wants to eat my face.”

But what I didn’t quite put together is that the teacher who gets killed in the beginning of the episode was probably the only person on the show who believed in Buffy as Buffy Summers and not Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Like, everyone who knows Buffy Summers thinks she’s a screw up- bad grades, no commitment to homework, skipped classes, got in fights, burned down a gym, was expelled from her past school. Only those who know about the Slayer know to overlook these blights as necessary to her fight against evil. Normal people, those who don’t know, always think she’s a screw up- even her mom.

This teacher on episode four who dies before the intro saw Buffy Summers. Saw the sharp girl in the back of the class, quick-witted, good on her feet, with all her flaws and blights and said, ‘don’t listen to anyone’s negative opinion about you. I see your potential. I see your ability. Put in the effort and show them how well you can succeed because I know you can.’

Giles is good enough- he becomes a father figure even- but it’s hinged in his belief of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, not for Buffy Summers. The way his guidance and care for Willow, for example, isn’t clouded by his belief that she must be something in the fight against the end times. Buffy the Vampire Slayer to Giles must shape up- and while played for comical relief, this is demonstrated in his inability to understand her desire to be Normal Teen Girl who tries out for cheerleading and skips fights to go to prom.

Buffy only mattered to people, only felt like she succeeded, as Buffy the Vampire Slayer- except for this random guy who dies 5 minutes into the episode and is never mentioned again.

exactly thank you spangelposting is like when they reintroduced wolves into yellowstone okay it’s necessary and healthy. its called species diversity

Okay so this is the episode where Buffy is put through a sort of graduation test for slayers because she’s turning 18 and therefore becoming an adult. The test is that she supposed to lose her powers and figure out what she’s able to do without them.

Without going into how much I hate this plot point, my issue with this episode is that she was a cheerleader before she was the slayer. She had coordination. She had athletic abilities superior to that of an average girl. And yeah, being the slayer, gave her super strength and put these abilities into overdrive, but they weren’t the sole reason for their existence.

And the way they show her losing her abilities is that she’s becoming a normal girl, and the first thing she’s supposed to lose is her coordination? The former cheerleader who still exercises daily?

Like, I’m sure someone will tell me that the plot for season 3 and Charisma Carpenter’s move to a potential Angel spinoff were already decided and the writers needed a reason why her character, who was incorporated into the gang and dating Xander, would completely leave.

And I’m sure someone will tell me Anya was only supposed to be the one episode about “the world without Buffy in Sunnydale.” (Which makes sense why she disappeared for a bit after.)

But she’s there for Xander.

Let me explain:

Xander cheats on Cordy with Willow. Making Willow and Xander be together was never the plan- drama for the plot was. So, Willow stays with Oz. Cordy would never stay with Xander after this. So, Xander is by himself, okay. But Xander has also been whiny and morally righteous at the expense of antagonizing Buffy for basically the whole show, with a harsh peak at season 3.

Being with Cordy was one of the things that humanized Xander so that he wasn’t just “a bad friend of Buffy’s” but “the boy Cordy loves.” The fact that the other characters care for Xander is his BEST redeeming quality. It does the most work.

So on the episode we see Anya come for the first time, Cordy is hurting the most. This episode sort of fast tracks her grieving process so the show can go forward, and Anya is HUGE in creating these circumstances.

However, now Xander is by himself a lot. How to humanize him now? Anya.

Xander is not emotionally mature and often has a low EQ. But next to Cordy, he’s downright Einstein. Similarly, Anya is somehow more blunt than Cordy, making Xander seem socially fluent and therefore appreciated.

And I definitely think that’s a perfect summary for why he grates my nerves. Like they portray everything he does as if it’s supposed to be good or funny or OK and a lot of the time it’s not.

But I’ve never really hated him.

And on my current Buffy rewatch, I think the pilot plot really provides room for Xander to sort of not be OK. Like I’m probably reading too much into this, but I feel like it’s valid for Xander to hate Angel when Angel is a vampire and vampires, not only have been trying to kill him since the pilot episode, but did very much kill one of his best friends, turn said best friend into a vampire, and then Xander had to stake him. Like they don’t mention it ever again, but that feels like a very traumatic moment where convincing yourself that your friend was evil is probably the only thing that is helping you get by with what happened.

Granted, a lot of this does revolve around how weird he is with Buffy- like he’s supposed to have a crush on her, but there’s also I think some specific possessiveness about her being the slayer and that not only being part of what makes him feel cool now (to the point Cordelia wishes she was never born) but also, possibly, safe?