#borkus

Sleeping in the same room with someone she barely knew felt strange but weirdly comforting at the same time. Instead of being alarmed by a strange man in her home, she actually felt more secure by his presence. And it was like that from the first moment he entered her place, something she couldn’t really explain to herself. It would have been healthy to be more careful, to feel more alarmed, to be more sceptical about that stranger with no past. But as much as she tried, she wasn’t. She couldn’t be. His presence was soothing, the way he always stayed just slightly behind her, worrying not to overstep his place in any way, the way he always tried to open the door for her, even though he was always one step behind her, the way his eyes stayed on her the entire time, listening carefully, soaking every piece of information she’d give him about Pons Ora, the diner or her place. He never interrupted, never asked inappropriate questions, and he never felt like a burden.

The first night at her place, she was a little worried if he’d be disappointed seeing how small it was or how modest it was, even though she warned him about it, and even though she made sure to explain to him that the place wasn’t her choice. Still, she worried that he’d think it somehow reflected on her and who she was as she watched him move slowly through the kitchen and observe the room.

“It’s not much, but it’s difficult here, there are no good apartments here, really, well, some are better, but they are not easy, or well impossible to…” - she caught herself rambling and she had to stop herself. She wondered for a moment why she cared so much and why she worried about his opinion. Gregor listened carefully, and as she stopped talking he turned towards her.

“I think it’s really nice. It’s your corner, your place.”

“Really?” - she said surprised.

She seemed slightly shocked and Gregor didn’t know if he said something wrong.

“What do you mean?” - he asked.

“You think this is really nice?” - she repeated in disbelief.

Gregor shrugged.

“I do. I don’t remember where I used to live, but something tells me it wasn’t as nice as this.”

She laughed.

“Gregor, there isn’t much that is nice about this place. It’s a basement. There’s barely any natural light. It’s small, and…”

But he didn’t hear the rest of the sentence. There was something about the way she said his name, or just the fact that she said it that made his heart flutter. It was a strange feeling, but it made him sentimental. It felt familiar, it felt intimate somehow, like she was an old friend… or something else. Her voice was soft and her lips plump, and Gregor felt himself getting lost in her face and that sentiment as he tuned back in:

“... but I tried to do as much as I could with it, so it’s much better than it was, to begin with” - she said.

Gregor still looked like his mind was far away, even though he tried hard to appear focused on what she was saying, his thoughts were still… somewhere else.

“Are you okay?” - he heard her ask, her face worried. “You look a little pale suddenly!”

“No, no, I’m fine, I’m great” - Gregor said, rubbing his neck, something she noticed he tended to do a lot. “I’m very thankful for this, and I’ll try to find a place of my own as soon as possible. I’ll talk to Mr Borkus tomorrow, and hopefully, I won’t be a burden to you for too long.”

Gregor’s eyes were soft and he smiled. As soon as he said that, she felt the urge to tell him that he doesn’t have to hurry but she stopped herself.

You don’t know this man, he’s a stranger.

Even though he was incredibly nice and kind and he needed her help, she had to keep repeating that he still was a stranger, since she could feel that getting used to him, and those big kind eyes fixed on hers would be very easy. She hasn’t been with a man in a while - Maker, she hasn’t been in a close proximity to an attractive man for longer than she would care to admit, so the feelings Gregor was waking up in her were familiar - just vaguely. She knew she needed to be wary of them though - he was a man she knew nothing about, and getting too attached to him could backfire seriously.

“Let me show you where you’ll sleep tonight then” - she said, trying to distract herself from those thoughts.

—------

“ Retreat, retreat! ”

The loud sound of his voice was echoing in his head. But the strange thing was that it wasn’t his voice, it only sounded like it. In fact, he was looking at himself, half covered in blood, yelling and screaming, and then turning around, seeing himself yet again running towards him, and then himself holding a blaster and shooting, while the sound of explosions overpowered his thoughts. Darkness, confusion, and the words - retreat , retreat constantly ringing in his ears, that deafening sound of bombs, voices, cries…

Gregor suddenly jumped, gasping for his breath, feeling the beads of sweat gathering on his temples.

It took him a moment to realise where he was. It was dark but not too dark. He could see the contours of the room that he shared with a woman he just met at the diner, and he noticed that she was silently observing him from her bed across the room.

“Oh, I’m sorry, did I wake you?”- he whispered, still slightly out of breath.

“No… well, yes… Are you okay?” - she whispered back.

He slowly sat up in his bed, trying to calm his breathing.

“I had a nightmare…” - he said, more like he was explaining what had happened to himself, while wiping the sweat off his forehead.

“Yes, I could tell” - she replied, still not moving.

“Did I say something…?”

“No, you were just… shifting… and breathing loudly..:”

“It’s strange, it was a strange dream,  I saw myself everywhere I turned. Myself as wounded and dying, myself as a soldier shooting at someone, myself as someone running from it all…I just… I can’t gather what that all means…”

“Perhaps you were a soldier…” -  she said, getting up slowly as well to sit in her bed.

“Soldier?” - Gregor asked, surprised.

The way he said it, the confusion in his voice made her wonder how much he actually knew about the world around him.

“You do know there’s a war going on, right?”

Gregor looked embarrassed but he said nothing, and she realised then and there that she always had to assume that he didn’t remember or know anything about the past or the general history or the present. How does one break to someone that there’s a galactic war raging? She’d been on the outskirts of it for a while now, so she wasn’t even sure she could give him the latest state of things. But the war was out there.

“Well, it’s been going on for a while.” - she said, hesitatingly. “There’s the galactic republic, and then there’s the confederacy, the systems and the planets who do not wish to be a part of it. The war… affected places differently. Some planets which sided with separatists - confederats,  were exploited and ruined, others were bombed or the batlles were too severe. We’re on the outskirts of it here, very far away from the core of the conflict.” She wondered if any of it made sense to him.

He listened silently, his eyes getting wider, looking almost like he was suppressing himself from asking too many questions at the same time.

“What side is this planet on?” - he asked.

She shrugged.

"No one’s side really, but there are massive amounts of rhydonium here, and the confederacy was here first to exploit it - so they’re here now, and the settlements are more or less under their control. But there are so few inhabitants here that they mostly leave us alone. They only care for rhydonium…”

The way Gregor looked at her, made her remember that she needed to explain even the most basic terms to him.

“Rhydonium is a fuel source….” - she added. He was quick to nod.

“Right, right..”  - Gregor said. He had so many questions for her, but he realised that he had to take one thing at a time, otherwise all the new information would overwhelm him. He wanted to know about that strange place he ended up in, but he was also slowly realising that besides all of that, finding out about his past and his present, he also wanted to learn more about her. She started to amaze him, her calm demeanour and her patience with him. She barely knew him but she didn’t mind explaining most basic things to him in the middle of the night. He couldn’t understand many things around him, but one thing was very clear to him and that was that he could trust her.

“I’m sorry…” - he finally spoke again. “For waking you up.”

She smiled and shrugged.

“You can’t help having nightmares, there’s nothing to apologise for!” - she said, as she lay back in her bed.

Gregor was quiet for a moment.

“Good night” - he heard her say. “Again”. - she chuckled.

“Yes, good night. Sorry again.” - Gregor mumbled, sliding back to his bed.

But he couldn’t sleep. There was a war raging, and he had dreams of soldiers, bombs, and blasters. He saw himself running, ducking from explosions. What did it all mean?

Gregor was suddenly overpowered by emotions, feeling alone and helpless. He turned to his side and opened his eyes. He wondered if she had fallen asleep already. She looked so peaceful and calm. He realised that he didn’t know anything about her.

I don’t know anything about myself either. Here we are, two strangers, not knowing anything about each other, but comforting each other in the middle of the night.

Gregor didn’t know much, but something told him that things like that didn’t happen too often. That only the lucky ones find people they can be so comfortable with.

—----

Strangely enough, Borkus didn’t seem much interested in Gregor at all. In the coming days, Gregor kept asking him for help with finding an apartment, or about the place where his ship crashed, but Borkus kept saying that they’d talk the next day, which never really came. She heard it every time, the way he brushed him off, and she felt bad for Gregor.

He was hard-working and did everything they asked him to in the kitchen. He ended up being a great help, and both Aleani and Kinn came to like him. After work, Gregor would usually disappear, before he’d return to her place late in the evening. She didn't want to ask him about where he spent his time, but she did warn him about walking too far outside of the settlement.

“What’s outside of the settlement?” - he asked.

“Nothing really. A desert, a void. You could walk for days and you wouldn’t see the end of it, and you wouldn’t even be sure that you were walking in one direction and not just in circles.” - she replied. “Quite a few people disappeared that way” - she added.

Gregor listened for a while and said nothing. She could feel that he was growing impatient with every day and everything that was going on, and the fact that his memory still was so patchy.

“Why do you think Borkus is avoiding all of my questions?” - he finally asked her, his eyes tired.

She hesitated for a moment.

“I don’t know, but I’ve noticed it.” - she finally said. “I think… I’m sure he’s hiding something.”

“Yes, but what?” - Gregor said, desperation lacing his voice.

“Hard to tell really. But as far as I know, there’s only one thing he cares about - credits. And he’ll do whatever it takes, exploit whoever comes in his way to get it. That much I know”

“Yeah, but what does that have to do with me? I have no credits, I’ve nothing….” - Gregor replied.

“Well…”

“What?” - he looked at her, curious.

“Well, unless, you do. Unless he has something of yours or some information about you that he can cash in with time, so it’s in his interest to keep you here for as long as possible.”

Gregors eyes got bigger.

“You think?” -

“I don’t know.” - she shrugged. Was she giving him too much hope, she suddenly wondered.

“There’s no way to know, of course…” - Gregor said, almost defeated.

“Unless…” - she said again.

“Unless?”

“Well… I was thinking. Tomorrow afternoon he goes on his supply trip, and usually, that takes several hours. I know where he keeps the spare keys from his house in the diner - we could sneak in and see if there’s something there. If he has something, if he found something, it’s there. There’s nowhere else he could keep it.” - she said, feeling excited about her idea.

Gregor was silent for a while and just observed her. She suddenly thought that she perhaps overstepped her line with that suggestion - proposing a break-in, what was she thinking? He must have thought she was nuts.

“Or not, you know, it’s just a stupid idea, I didn’t really mean it…” - she stammered.

After what seemed like an eternity, Gregor looked at her with the biggest grin she had ever seen on his face.

“No, I like it. Let’s do it, let’s do that!”.

—-

The next day, as soon as Borkus left, as usual without saying a word to the rest of them, she looked at Gregor and Gregor nodded.

“Aleani” - she approached him, “Is there any chance you guys could finish off today without Gregor and me?”.

Aleani looked at her surprised - she never left work earlier, and now she was going somewhere with Gregor! He knew something was going on - but he also knew not to ask any unnecessary questions. If there was something to tell he knew she’d tell him.

“Sure, you go ahead, we’ve got this!”

“Thanks, Aleani, I owe you” - she smiled.

“You just be careful, okay?” - he said and she nodded.

She stepped outside and waited for Gregor to appear.

“How far away is his place?” - he asked as he appeared.

“Not too far, just around the corner here.” - she said and pointed.

“How do you have his keys?” - Gregor wondered as he followed her.

Well, I don’t exactly have them, but I know where he keeps them, so… “- she smiled.

She was taking an awfully lot of risks for him, Gregor realised, and wondered if he should say something, or thank her, or stop her, but decided not to. There’d be time for that - hopefully.

As they approached Borkus’ house Gregor’s eyes got bigger:

“This is where he lives? Alone? It’s huge!”

“Yes, that’s Mr Borkus for you! Tiny little basements for us, and a palace for him. Anyway, we don’t have time for that now, come on!”  - she pulled him towards the entrance, worried that someone might spot them. She unlocked the door and they slowly entered.

The house was big, not too big, but certainly huge by Pons Ora’s standards. It had a huge entrance area overlooking a dining room, and a staircase leading to the upper two floors. They entered carefully, worried that someone might still hear them, even though the house was clearly empty.

“Now, if you had something to hide, where would you hide it?” - she whispered.

Gregor shrugged.

“Upstairs, perhaps?”

She looked up and thought for a moment.

“Perhaps, let’s check it out!

Reaching the middle floor they found two extra rooms, one with a bed, and another with a big half-empty closet, that they carefully looked through. They only found clothes and some children’s toys.

“Does he have children?” - Gregor whispered.

“I have no idea. I don’t really know him.” - she whispered back, and immediately wondered why they were still whispering. “We’re not going to find anything here. Let’s check the next floor”.

As they came up to the one floor above they both squinted. It was one big vast area surrounded by long windows on all four sides. An incredibly bright light was entering the room from all sides, but the room was completely empty.

“There’s nothing here” - Gregor said out loud.

She felt her heart sink, disappointed. She was sure they’d find something, and somehow she still believed something was there. She just had a very strong feeling, like an intuition. But the top floor was empty, and there was nothing suspicious on the second floor or the entrance. Suddenly she had an idea:

“There’s a basement! There has to be a basement. There’s a basement in every house here, they’re obsessed with basements in the settlements, as there’s always something to hide around here or someone to hide from!”.

Gregor could barely keep up with her as she sprinted down the stairs and found the basement without any difficulties. As they entered they could feel the cold, moist air, almost similar to the one they breathed in every day in their own basement. It was dark, and they could barely see, but as soon as they entered they could see a large object in the middle of the small room.

Gregor stopped and she thought she heard him silently gasp.

“What is it?” - she whispered. “Something you recognize?”

Gregor shook his head.

“I don’t know. I don’t think so. Not that I can remember, but… but….”

“What?” - she whispered as she came closer to him.

“I don’t know. I suddenly had chills running through my body, but perhaps it’s the cold, I don’t know… it’s probably nothing.” - Gregor said.

“Let’s see what’s inside” - she said, as she approached the crate. It looked heavy, with a massive lid, that she tried to move but couldn’t. Gregor joined her and helped her, but the lid was simply too heavy and it somehow appeared to be welded into the rest of the crate.

“We’ll never get this opened here” - she said out of breath. “We need to figure out how to bring this back to our basement, or bring some tools over here”.

As soon as she said that they both froze. A squeaky sound of a door opening came from upstairs, followed by the heavy steps against the wooden floor. Borkus was back. Gregor looked at her, and she put her finger on her lips and nodded slowly to him, showing him to just be silent. What was he doing back so early, she wondered. Could he have known something? Did he notice that his spare house keys from the diner were missing?

All these thoughts were raging in her head for what seemed like an eternity when they suddenly realised the sounds of his steps were slowly fading, and then changing the rhythm as he started to climb the stairs. That was their cue to move, but she suddenly froze, completely unable to move. Gregor took her hand in his and looked at her. She could feel her heart beating so fast and hard that she wondered if he could feel it as well. He squeezed her hand harder, came closer to her and made sure that her eyes were on him. She gazed into his eyes, and for a split second she felt like she was washed over by a very powerful wave of calmness, her breathing synchronising with his, and her anxiety fading away. He stayed that way for a moment, and then slowly moved, holding her hand firmly. She followed him closely, squeezing his hand back. They came up to the entrance, and in three steps they were in front of the door. They couldn’t hear Borkus’ steps anymore, and he wasn’t anywhere to be seen, so they assumed he was still upstairs - in any case, there was no time to hang around to find out. Gregor opened the door as silently as he could, not pressing the button for the automatic opening as that would be too loud, but instead manually sliding them open. He showed her to step outside, which she did, slowly and carefully, and he followed. He closed the door behind him, and as soon as they were outside they looked at each other and started running. They couldn’t wait to get as far from his house as possible.

Their basement wasn’t far, and as they approached it she noticed that Gregor was still holding her hand firmly even though they were at quite a safe distance from Borkus' house by that point.

They ran inside their basement, the doors sliding behind them. As they entered they both panted, but Gregor wasn’t letting go of her hand. She felt he was squeezing it as they were both trying to catch their breath. She stood close to him, not trying to free her hand but wondering whether he was aware that he was still holding her hand in his. It went on for almost a minute, them just standing silently next to each other, trying to process everything that had just happened and how close they came to being caught in a break-in into their boss’ place, holding hands.

She could feel it when he noticed. His entire body stiffened, and he looked at his hand, gripping hers and then looked at her. She stood silently next to him, and she smiled, wanting to show him that it was okay. That she didn’t mind. That he was in shock, and that he wasn’t aware that he was doing it and that she understood.

But then without a word he came one step closer to her, his eyes serious and fixed on her. He didn’t release her hand, but instead took her other hand as well, now firmly holding both her hands in his, as his body closed any little distance left between them. He was tall, towering over her, her eyes looking up to meet his. She felt how both their breathings calmed and slowed down, as his chest gently leaned against hers. His body was firm and she could almost feel the heat radiating from him. She was lost in his intense eyes and the way they all of a sudden hungrily lingered on her lips. She instinctively lifted her head up as he moved closer to her, feeling his soft beard on her chin as his lips gently touched hers.

Pons Ora wasn’t a place where anyone asked any questions. It was an unwritten rule everyone lived by. A mix of people and aliens of all species from all the corners of the galaxy, all running from something or someone. It was a way of living there, a certain silent respect for everyone’s privacy - or just a way to avoid more trouble than necessary.

There wasn't much to see in Pons Ora. It was one of the settlements on Abafar, a remote desert world in the Outer Rim. Colourless and bland. Grey houses stacked against one another in no particular order, with a pale orange sky surrounding them. There was a landing strip at the outskirts of the town but no one ever seemed to ever take off from that place. The ships would only rarely come by, bringing supplies and leaving immediately. The settlement was surrounded by an endless Void, a vast desert, so vast that no one from Pons Ora was ever able to see its end. Rumours said there might have been other settlements on Abafar, but the attempts to locate them, riding across the Void for days in speeders, all failed.

Occasionally, settlers found ships that crashed in the Void and sometimes they’d manage to save the passengers, but the ships tended to be in such bad conditions that they could never be repaired.

It was how she ended up there. Many rotations ago. Not that many for her to forget everything from her past, but there were nights when it certainly felt like it. After a while a place like that made you start forgetting everything that had happened before, and sometimes that felt comforting. Other times she’d lie awake at night and long for her home, cherishing every single memory that still was imprinted in her mind. Longing for her family. For the life that seemed gone forever.

A place like that didn’t have that many opportunities for a woman like her. There was one bar in the whole settlement and it had enough, almost too many waiters, so the owner offered her a job as a dancer. But she was never a dancer, she never enjoyed dancing and she was never any good at it. Besides, dancing in front of people, men, mainly of questionable past did not classify as her dream job.

Another opportunity was the diner, ‘Power Sliders’. It seemed cleaner and more straightforward. One night, she mentioned to the owner, a Sullustan named Borkus, that she was a talented cook, and the next thing she knew, she was hired. She usually worked the morning shifts, preparing breakfasts and caf. Mornings were also the busiest, so it was never boring and work made time go faster. In the afternoon, after she’d finished her shift and cleaned her kitchen, she’d walk home which wasn’t very far - nothing was in Pons Ora - prepare some light dinner for herself, and watch holo-dramas or read a book. It became a routine that she enjoyed most of the days. She didn’t make a lot of friends. People usually kept to themselves. Getting closer also meant revealing a part of your story, and people were there because they didn't want their stories revealed. So it suited her just fine.

There were few regulars at the diner. An older Twilek gentleman who always brought the same copy of the newspaper that he’d just laid down next to his caf and eggs. He was very particular about that, the newspaper had to be on the left side, the plate in the middle and the caf cup to the right. She often thought how there must have been an article in that copy that was of great significance to him. Something he didn’t want to forget, something he cherished, and something that comforted him.

Then there was a zabrak couple who didn’t talk much, but who were genuinely nice to everyone when they did. A rodian and an ithorian who always sat next to each other and always talked about same things. They’d come around the same time, sit at the same table, order the same food and keep the same conversation. There was also an older lady who’d sit at the counter for hours, drinking countless cups of caf, and barely ever interacting with anyone. She observed them all, even though she almost never came in contact with any of the customers, but she felt like she knew them and she often wondered about the lives they led - and used to lead.

Borkus owned a few apartments in the settlement, or rather what he preferred to call apartments. They were just basement units that were divided into rooms, and he rented them out to her and two other workers at the diner. He never told them what the rent was, but he took a substantial cut out of their paychecks claiming it was only part of it. She knew it was wrong, and she knew it was a lie. She lived in a tiny place with barely any natural light, a cold and a moist basement, with a kitchen and a tiny room. She didn’t complain and she didn't need more - but the rent for that place couldn’t have been more than a few credits - and it would have been difficult to find someone who would pay that much. But nice apartments were almost impossible to come by in Pons Ora, so she didn’t have much choice.

One day changed all that. Her life in Pons Ora, her routine that until that point seemed so solid and unshakeable. That morning started just like any other morning. She woke up early, before the daylight, and made herself caf and got ready for work. One of the other workers, an older man called Aleani, usually got there first, opened up the diner, and started prepping the breakfast. But that morning something was different. As she entered the diner she could hear more voices and she could hear Borkus’ voice which was unusual - he was usually the one who arrived last, sometimes an hour or two after everyone else. As she entered the kitchen, she saw Aleani, Kinn, a young cleaner, and Borkus standing around a dark man she has never seen before. The man looked confused and kept his eyes on the floor. She stood still for a moment, wondering what was going on and why there was a stranger in her kitchen. Borkus never allowed anyone besides the staff to come anywhere near it.

“There she is! Are you planning to come in or are you just going to stand there?” - she heard Borkus’ voice. Everyone turned and looked in her direction, and she caught the stranger’s eyes. He was beautiful, so beautiful that she felt her cheeks blush all of a sudden. The stranger observed her as she entered the kitchen cautiously.

“Hello!” - she said, although it sounded more like a question. It was a question! Who was he? What was he doing there?

“We have a new dishwasher!” - Borkus announced, pointing towards the new stranger as if reading her mind. She quickly exchanged looks with Aleani and Kinn, none of them clearly having any clue what was going on. For all the time they were working there, Borkus never once showed an interest in employing anyone else at the diner and the job seekers were countless. Any stray that ended up in Pons Ora would eventually find its way to the diner in the search of a job and credits. Why were they suddenly hiring a new dishwasher that they didn’t really need, and more importantly who was he? None of them saw him before.

“But I usually wash the dishes, Mr Borkus, does that mean…?” - Kinn was the first to speak but he was quickly interrupted.

“It means nothing. You will share your work. I need you to help clean the front now as well, so you’ll have more time for that” - Borkus said. He turned towards the stranger and pointed to Kinn: “He will show you what to do.” - he said as he turned and left, not willing to answer any further questions.

The stranger just stood in the middle of it all, not saying anything. It was clear he was shy and uncomfortable with everything, but she had a strange feeling that the whole situation he found himself in wasn’t exactly his own fault. Kinn gave her a confused look, not really knowing what to do and whether the stranger’s training was to start effective immediately.

“I… erm…I’m sorry” - the man suddenly spoke. His voice was raspy and deep, and his eyes were now nervously looking to make contact with any of them. “I hope I’m not creating any kind of trouble here for anyone, I…I…”

“It’s alright, you’re not” - Aleani was the first to speak. He was the diner veteran, working there longer than any of them. She never knew his entire story, as one should never ask for anyone’s story on Abafar, but she knew enough to know he was a good and kind man. And Aleani could sense that the stranger needed help, whatever his situation was. It was still very unclear why he was there in the first place, but they all could sense that they wouldn't get an answer to that question any time soon. So they needed to find a way to work together at least for the time being.

“This is our chef” - Aleani pointed towards her and the man nodded. “She makes the menu, but the menu is usually very simple. We help her with anything she needs. On a particularly busy day, we might chop vegetables, or make caf.”

She was silent the entire time and observed the man. There was something about him, a feeling like she had seen him somewhere before although she knew the odds for that were nearly impossible. Still, he elicited a sense of familiarity along with kindness. She liked him instantly in fact, but she was wary of that emotion and she was afraid to show it. They knew nothing about him and if Borkus brought him in, knowing all the shady business he was involved in and that none of them knew much about, it was best to remain cautious about the whole situation.

“I’m kind of a manager here, but I also help with serving, as does Kinn.” - Aleani continued - “and also with cooking, cleaning, washing, whatever is needed. The mornings are busiest, but lunchtimes can also be crowded. But as you’ll see, this is a small settlement, so even when it’s busy, it’s busy by Pons Ora’s standards. It’s doable. But still, we’re a team here, and we help each other.”

The stranger kept nodding as he carefully listened. He was tall, dark and really beautiful. Every time she caught his eyes she felt her cheeks slightly blush for some reason, which annoyed her. His eyes were big, expressive and kind, and his face was framed by a long bushy beard. She couldn’t shake the feeling that she somehow knew him from somewhere like she saw his face on a picture or a poster, or the holonet, but there was no chance to place him at the moment.

Just as Kinn was about to show him where everything was, Borkus appeared at the door again, interrupting everyone:

“He’ll be staying with you.” - he turned to her.

She wasn’t sure he heard him well.

“Excuse me, what? He’ll be staying with me?” - she repeated.

The stranger looked at them awkwardly as he shifted from one leg to another. He really didn't want to impose on anyone but he was in an unfavourable situation.

“Yes, you have the biggest apartment” - Borkus said, annoyingly still calling the places they all lived in ‘apartments’.

“Mine’s the biggest? Seriously?” - she said and turned to Kinn. “What are yours like if mine’s the biggest?”.

Kinn didn't say anything and continued to show the stranger where everything was. Borkus turned and left, as unceremoniously as he came in, not interested in further discussions.

She raised her arms more to herself, wondering why her peaceful life was all of a sudden beginning to take a different turn. Up until minutes ago, she was ready to dive into her daily routine, and now there was a beautiful stranger working and living with her all of a sudden. She hasn’t been this close to an attractive man in… best not to think how long, she thought. How was she going to do this?

Kinn was explaining about the different cupboards and where everything went but the stranger didn’t seem to have been listening to him at all. He was looking in her direction and finally excused himself and came closer to her.

“Hey, listen” - he said and startled her. “Sorry, sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you…. Listen, I don’t want to make anyone’s lives complicated here, so I can just sleep here in the kitchen, there’s no problem!”

Maker, there was something about this man. True, she didn't want her life uprooted and more complicated than necessary, but at the same time, there was something intriguing and pleasant about this man. The way he spoke, his soft voice and his unthreatening, almost helpless demeanour made her not want to object too much to the new arrangements. She felt like she’d known this man longer than she was aware of and it was a strange feeling. On top of that, this was the first thing that had ever happened to her in that uneventful place, and it almost felt like it was meant to happen. Like this was the reason she was there in the first place. It was an irrational feeling, but a strong, unexplainable one.

“No, look, we’ll figure it out, somehow, it’s fine” - she stammered, still not being able to hold his gaze for longer than a mere moment. His eyes were intense. “Borkus is right, there is an extra couch back at my place, and of course, you can stay there…. So, no, don’t worry about it.”

The stranger smiled which made his whole face look even friendlier. She averted her eyes yet again from him, gazing at her feet.

“Are you sure? It would only be temporary of course, I want to find my own place, it’s just… I just got here, and I… I don’t exactly know where to start… or how.” - the stranger started rubbing the back of his neck and she suddenly looked at him.

“You just arrived here?” - she asked. It’s been a while since the last newcomer.  “How do you know Borkus?”

It was strange for someone who just arrived at Abafar to score a job at the diner right away. Especially when they didn’t need any help. She wondered if she was asking too much, but if he was going to stay at her place she decided she needed some answers.

The man shifted from one leg to another, looking quite uncomfortable.

“I… I’m not sure.” - he finally said.

“What do you mean?” - she asked, not removing her eyes from him.

“I don’t know… I…I don’t quite remember. It’s the strangest feeling, but I don’t know. I don’t know how I ended up here. And I don’t remember where I came from.” - He seemed almost ashamed all of a sudden, and he kept shifting from one leg to another. His voice was lower now, and he came one step closer to her, signalling that his admission was only meant for her.

“You…you don’t remember?” - she said, stunned. “You don’t remember anything from before?” - she repeated.

“No” - the stranger shrugged. “Nothing”. He looked at her almost apologetically.

“So.. you don’t know how you know Borkus?” - she investigated further.

“I don’t know. I mean, I know that my ship crashed here, and I think I was unconscious for a while, and then the next thing I remember was Borkus, then riding on a speeder with him and arriving here last night.”

“Do you think Borkus knows something about where you came from?

“I don’t know, but that’s my only hope for now. I think he knows something, so I think it’s best to stay here, close to him. Where would I go anyway? I mean, as far as I understood it is not easy to get off of this planet anyway.”

“No, no it isn’t…there aren’t any ships, and the ones that rarely arrive and bring supplies won’t take anyone.” - she said, feeling more and more concerned about the man. “I’m sorry, that just sounds… tough. Not to remember..”

“It is. I have some flashes… something… like earlier today, it was a face, someone’s face but it looked very much like mine but it wasn’t me… But it was very real, and I’m sure it was someone from my past… But, I couldn’t really remember anything more than that. It's strange!” - he stammered.

“That must be really hard!” - she whispered for some reason, more to herself. Abafar was a tough place, the Void and the endlessness surrounding it often playing tricks on one’s mind. One thing that helped everyone get by was the connection to the previous life, the memories of how life used to be and hopefully how life could be again. It was the hope, hope gave everyone the strength and the courage to keep going in a hopeless place such as that, far away from everything and everyone. Hope that things will change. Hope that things will get back to normal and that those precious previous lives somehow will get restored.

But that hope couldn’t exist if you didn’t know what normal was for you. When you didn’t have any memories, nothing to anchor you, no past or home to look forward to. And she couldn’t imagine how difficult that would get for him once he settled there and once he experienced how tough Abafar and the uncertainty could get. Not knowing how she could help the stranger, she was overwhelmed with nothing but compassion for him. But she never trusted Borkus, and she was almost certain that he must have known more about the stranger than he cared to admit. He had some reason, some interest in bringing him in and not revealing what he knew about him. That must have been the way to find some answers at least, and knowing how Borkus was manipulative and generally difficult, she thought the stranger alone didn’t stand any chance of getting them on his own. She could probably help him to get some truth out of Borkus, but she knew it would take time. In the meantime, she should do anything in her power to help him get settled there. The strong determination she felt confused her for a moment and she shook her head lightly as if trying to shake that feeling off. She had to help him. It would be the one meaningful thing she could do in that meaningless place.

“Do you know your name?” - she asked suddenly, something she never asked anyone on Abafar before. People either told you their names or they didn’t, real or fake ones, but questions about it were never asked.

The stranger raised his eyes that sparked for a moment as he caught her gaze.