#bobxjohn

Yelena: Who pissed you off? Bob: glowering John smiled at a guy. Yelena: …so? Bob: John doesn’t smile. Not like that. Not at other people. John: walks in Hey Bob— Bob: instantly softens Hi :) Yelena: this is disgusting.

John: I am NOT jealous. Bob: You glared at a lamp because it was near me. John: THAT LAMP WAS SUSPICIOUS. Bob: It was literally plugged into the wall. John: EXACTLY. WHY WAS IT SO CLOSE TO YOU. Bob: …Do you want to sit next to me? John: NO— Bob: John: sits next to him immediately Bob: Yelena: I swear I’m raising toddlers.

Bob: why’s he talking to you? John: …he asked for the time. Bob: WELL HE CAN ASK ME THE TIME TOO. John: you weren’t even in the room. Bob: I COULD’VE BEEN.

John: Why are you staring at me? Bob: I’m trying to figure out how you manage to look like a golden retriever and a war crime at the same time. John: …thank you? Bob: You’re welcome. Yelena: that was a compliment in bob-ese.

John: Bob, if you’re gonna confess something, just say it. Bob: …Okay. John: Bob: I stole your protein bars. John: THAT’S your confession?! Bob: And also I might be in love with you but the protein bars felt more urgent. John: YOU— WHAT— Bucky: walking by The bars were more urgent?? Yelena: Priorities. Bob: He gets scary when he’s hungry. John: YOU’RE TELLING EVERYONE I’M SCARY?? Bob: …You literally threatened the vending machine yesterday— John: IT ATE MY DOLLAR. Yelena: god I love this soap opera.