#blue memory arc

Chapter 12 of the official Black Butler Anthology has Sebastian pretend to be Ciel's childhood friend for the day (the "osananajimi" trope in romance anime, even teases him playfully)

Sebastian, as himself, likes holding Ciel's hand, and walking side by side with the Young Master... But Ciel doesn't think it's possible to hold hands with Sebastian like this because he isn't human... Or at least they can't, because of their current roles and circumstances.

He does not allow himself to succumb to such illusions.

Sobbing hands and knees on the floor rn, once again plugging in Hallucination because I keep hurting myself thinking about how they believe it's not possible for them to hold each other's hands, as master and servant, as demon and human.

Thinking about Sebastian having inner conflict, wondering if it's such a sin as a demon to enjoy holding his master's hand, a simple touch of affection. So unbecoming of a servant and yet indulging in it every chance he gets... Dancing with him, carrying him, helping him into/out of the carriage.. what would it be like to hold his master's hand in his own, without pretense nor necessity?

They can never walk side by side, that's the way things are. And yet...

To want this much...

It is interesting to think about Joker and Beast's interactions this way, by literally reading Joker as "Ciel" (words in blue), and Beast as "Sebastian" (words in red):

"Sebastian" (represented by Beast) wants them to change course. And seems almost desperate about it. "Ciel" (represented by Joker) is surprised and does not seem to take "Sebastian's"/Beast's emotions seriously.

"Sebastian"/Beast no longer wants to see "Ciel"/Joker in pain. But "Ciel"/Joker is stubborn and dismissive, which devastates "Sebastian"/Beast.

Disclaimer - I probably rambled a lot on this. It became longer than I wanted, but it's finally here!

1. Caelum Phantomhive

After much thought, rethinking, and research, my conclusion regarding O!Ciel's real name is: Caelum (pronounced "KAY-lum"). Therefore, the twins would be Ciel & Caelum Phantomhive.

And I'd like to delve a little deeper into that.

Let's start by comparing both names:

- The name Ciel is of French origin and means "sky" or "heaven". It is also linked to the Latin word for "heaven" (caelum). The name evokes a sense of infinity, ethereal beauty, and purity. It also represents a sense of freedom, elevation, and celestial beauty.

- The name Caelum is of Latin origin and (like the previous name) means "sky" or "heaven." It also has the specific meaning of "engraver's chisel," which comes from the faint southern constellation called Caelum Sculptoris ("Engraver's Chisel"). Therefore, in addition to a celestial meaning, it is also related to a tool.

(Seen as “Cela Sculptoris” in the lower right of this 1825 star chart from Urania's Mirror)

Caelum is a faint constellation in the southern sky, introduced in the 1750s by Nicolas Louis de Lacaille and counted among the 88 modern constellations. Its name means "chisel" in Latin, and it was formerly known as Caelum Sculptorium ("Engraver's Chisel"); it is a rare word, unrelated to the much more common Latin caelum, meaning "sky," "paradise," or "atmosphere."

It is the eighth smallest constellation and subtends a solid angle of about 0.038 steradians, slightly smaller than that of Corona Australis.

Due to its small size and location far from the plane of the Milky Way, Caelum is a rather barren constellation, with few objects of interest - Wikipedia

This is a chisel. It is used to cut, carve, and shape hard materials such as wood, stone, and metal. It is a tool with a sharp blade that can be used manually with hand strength or by striking with a hammer, or mechanically, as in pneumatic hammers. There are also specific surgical chisels for dental procedures, used to remove bone or to assist in tooth extraction by severing periodontal ligaments.

I would like you to keep this information about the chisel in mind, because I will be referring to it again later.

2. The Birth and Childhood of the Phantomhive Twins

Well, Vincent Phantomhive mentioned that the name chosen for the twins was met with strangeness by the family, due to how unusual they were for that time. And, between us, it's a good thing they were named the way they were, because otherwise we would probably be following the story of James & John Phantomhive – which, although beautiful names, don't have the same appeal as the ones we know.

But, back to the subject:

I'm assuming that Rachel and Vincent had already discussed possible names for the baby if it was a boy; and one of the chosen names ended up being Ciel. As mentioned above, this is a name that evokes the qualities of infinity, ethereal and/or celestial beauty, purity, freedom, and elevation. A different name, but with a certain refinement, ideal for a future earl, especially one from the Phantomhive family.

Only now they had two. (Oh, yeah, O! Ciel teaching us from an early age to expect the unexpected). So a name with the same meaning would be a way to symbolize the bond between them. Something they both could have in common.

And here I'll pull some of the information we have from the manga:

"One twin is like a mirror image of the other, therefore, for those who don't know them well, it would be practically impossible to tell the difference."

Well, Ciel and Caelum share the same meaning, as we could see above ("heaven" or "sky"), but the pronunciation of the names is quite different from each other:

CIEL - pronounced "see-ELL"

CAELUM - pronounced "kay-LUM"

So, just by pronouncing the name, we can already notice a difference. However, even with different names and pronunciations, the meaning of something that refers to the ethereal and the celestial is something that both share; so we can say that here the order of things was "altered," but with its essence maintained:

"The twins were identical in a certain aspect, but completely different once you look from another point of view"

Another strong difference, once the twins were observed, was that one of them was more "extroverted" than the other. R!Ciel could converse with people, mingle, and take the lead without problems. O!Ciel, whether due to shyness or something already linked to his fragile health, was better at following, obeying, and letting others (mostly his older brother) take the lead.

It's worth remembering that, if nowadays people who communicate more easily seem to get "ahead," imagine what it was like in Victorian times, especially considering the Phantomhive family's position in society. Children of nobles were expected to communicate exceptionally well. To be strong, confident, and decisive. So for O!Ciel, who was the way he was in childhood, he was practically the same as "his" constellation:

Small. Distant. Uninteresting. Boring. Not as bright as others.

It's hard not to wonder how he would have fared if things hadn't taken the turn they did. How he would have lived if that tragedy on his tenth birthday hadn't happened. But unfortunately it did, and it changed everything in his life and his brother's.

And I'm going to end this post here and do a part two later; this ended up being longer than I imagined it would be...

“You shouldn’t be here,” Sieglinde says, her gaze quickly darting behind Lizzy. I shouldn’t have opened the door to begin with. No one, except for her maidservant—nobody from the Phantomhive household, it appears. “What are you doing here?” “Won’t you let me in, Sully?” Lizzy asks, calm and composed with a teary smile and all. The ends of her ponytails are soaked through with rain, and the hands holding her skirt just above the ground trembles. “Please?”

Sometime after the Ciel that she knows disappears, his maybe-ex-fiancée shows up at Sieglinde’s doorstep.

Hey Anon ! Do you mean this scene ?

Well, I have an explanation, but I doubt it's what you're expecting. ;)

In my opinion, this scene is actually maybe more understandable if you consider the Munchausen by proxy theory [x][x], on top of the RCMT.

Basically, both theories emphasize that 1) real!Ciel was pathologically obsessed with our!Ciel and wanted him to "stay by his side forever", leading to 2) real!Ciel trying to control our!Ciel, maybe even going as far as to more or less poison him, so that our!Ciel would have to let his twin take care of him, becoming very thankful to him, thus furthering their bond (in real!Ciel's mind).

Want a proof that this theory is likely ? In ch138, Ciel realized, after that one month of abduction and torture, that he didn't get sick at all, despite living in terribly harsh conditions (cold, lack of food, physical and emotional abuse, etc).

And the one big element missing from that awful month compared to their peaceful days at home ? It's real!Ciel "taking care" of him, bringing him tea and food for his health.

Don't get me wrong, with the circus arc, we know that our!Ciel definitely had a weaker constitution that he inherited from Rachel. However, he was also probably chronically poisoned by his older brother on the side, which is why he definitely got better from the moment real!Ciel was not able to bring him food and beverages anymore.

Let's rewind back about that scene you were asking about from ch131, now : Rachel and our!Ciel were sick, so Vincent and real!Ciel, with Diedrich, cooked food for them.

Then later during the night, our!Ciel was couching, so real!Ciel brought him milk.

The following day, our!Ciel's fever was not that bad but his cough was terrible so Rachel forbade him to go boating -> how s w e e t ! more time and occasion for real!Ciel to "take care of his little brother", nurturing that special bond between them, because they're made to be "together forever". Except...

our!Ciel acted selflessly, as it is a great quality of his [x] [x] [x], and insisted the family went to enjoy a day outside, since Rachel was doing okay, while he spent the day with Tanaka.

TL;DR In this scene, I think real!Ciel expected Rachel to say our!Ciel wouldn't be able to go boating, since he's the one who triggered the coughing, leading him to spend the day taking care of his little brother yet again (in other words, controlling him), except that he didn't consider our!Ciel would strongly insist for the family to go without him.

I told you it might not be what you expected as an answer. :) I, for one, am quite convinced that real!Ciel had a pathological behavior since childhood, that is ten times amplified now that he's a bizarre doll.